- Me, After Reading Harry Potter And The Cursed Child

- me, after reading harry potter and the cursed child

the olympians: zeus, poseidon, hades

Terminator trolley lady

rewatching Philosopher’s Stone after Cursed Child

All Was Well (Before “Cursed Child”)

Honestly, the most basic problem with Cursed Child, even as a concept, is that it takes a shit on pretty much everything that we learn in the epilogue.

In the epilogue, Albus and Rose are clearly very close; Albus is anxious to even go to Hogwarts without her. In Cursed Child, Rose is a stuck-up little snot who won’t talk to him for years just because they got sorted into different Houses and he won’t shun a boy whom she doesn’t like. 

In the epilogue, Albus and Harry have a good relationship, as seen by the quiet father-son moment that they have before Albus boards the train. In Cursed Child, we find out that that moment was apparently a fluke, because their relationship is actually strained and dysfunctional. (Also, for some reason Albus hates his parents’ nickname for him.)

In the epilogue, Albus really, really doesn’t want to be put in Slytherin, and yes, I get that this is the same Slytherin-bashing that we’ve gotten the whole series, but the point is, Harry assures Albus both that the Hat will take his wishes into account and that it doesn’t really matter anyway. In Cursed Child, it turns out that no, the Hat doesn’t care a jot what Albus wants, and being in Slytherin exacerbates all sorts of problems that Albus has both with Hogwarts and his father.

I know that stories need conflict, and I’m not saying that Harry and Albus can’t ever fight or that everything has to be totally perfect. And I know a lot of people find the epilogue shmaltzy, but I actually really liked it because, after all that darkness, it gave the series a happy ending. But in Cursed Child, we need to retcon every bit of happiness away to justify a stupid story that rehashes all of that old darkness. You can argue that, hey, all of these problems get sorted out by the end of the play…but if that’s the case, why did we need the play to begin with? These problems were already sorted out nine years ago when the epilogue first came out!

Harry Potter and the Cursed Child fucks up a lot of canon facts, but it’s just as bad with the ending’s tone. The epilogue literally ends with “All was well,” only for this play to come along and say, “Well, except everything, apparently.” 

I'm not sure if this person really knows how to read...

I don’t understand why the OoTP were so accepting of Tonks, when they treated her aunt (Bellatrix) like crap the whole time.

(Tech’s note: I mean it might have something to do with Bella being a murdering Death Eater and them being a group wholly against that?)