Pancakemanyo-blog - Ezekiel - Tumblr Blog

reblog to fucking bite the person you reblog from

WHY DID NO FUCKING SAY ANYTHING

survived checking my bank account. i deserve a little treat

So fucking accurate

Can someone just send me $10,000

Pour one out for a real one.

Kink isn’t shameful because of the weird sex stuff. That part’s rad. It’s shameful because it is technically improv. 

This blog is a safe space.

Nazis, TERFs, pedophiles, bigots, Tr*mp supporters, Islamophobes, exclusionists, queerphobes, and anyone who can’t reblog this post, etc, do not interact. I will block you.

tired: mermaids are all women

wired: much like elves, merfolk are mistaken by sailors for being all women because they have long hair and are very pretty

being a manager sucks balls half the time but the cashier kids im in charge of trust me enough to dick around in front of me so ive been keeping a running list of the shit they say that makes me laugh randomly: -"guys, is it cheating if you play fortnite with your ex" [4 seperate others, immediately]: "YES" -"there must be like… infinite sentences" -"bro what bro what the fuck bro what's that mean bro why'd you say that bro what" <distraught response to a girl randomly greeting him with 'hey there big boy' in an old timey transatlantic news reporter accent

Funny part of the bottom surgery process is when the doc asks you for your specific wishes. Cause there's like a lot of options in how deep you want it and how functional it all needs to be. I was like "I wanna fuck good" and he was like "yeah girl I can do that" and I was like "my man"

Bros before hoes?

@paradoxical-machine

Can we stop acting like two people deeply loving each other has to mean they have something romantic or sexual going on? Can we stop talking as if platonic love just can't be that deep? Because that's not true. Platonic love can be just as deep, and sometimes even deeper, than romantic love. What I'm saying is, we need to stop putting romance on this pedestal and act like every other form of love is less important.

"autistic couples are so cute!! their little relationships are so adorable🥺" u would not say this if u saw the sex we have

This could save lives so I thought I’d share!

Meme of the day

Not aroace but this image is amazing. Take me reblog

"No guy wants a girl who-" "No guy is gonna want you if-"

original image from @sirompp

ah no can’t hang out today i’m gonna smoke weed and jerk off yeah it’s gonna be an all day thing sorry actually wait do you want to watch

trans girls will be like “yeah i mean my voice isnt that good” and then make noises that activate the prey drive humans haven’t had for thousands of years

But what if they don't give me validation that I did a good job? I should probably work faster to make sure the manager doesn't get mad at me

being anticapitalist with a strong work ethic is so fucking embarrassing like my managers don't deserve this

The CIA tries to kill Clark Kent, not because they know he’s Superman, but because he’s a really good journalist. They keep making it look like an accident, but every plan fails. It’s a comedy as the CIA can’t figure out why their attempts always go wrong.