Someone Needs To Write Headcannons Of The Bnha Boys Reacting To The 'peel Me An Orange Challenge' Right

Someone needs to write headcannons of the bnha boys reacting to the 'peel me an orange challenge' right fukin now

stop unfollowing me im pregnant and it’s yours

Your Naga Lord saves your Mother

A/N: I've had this oneshot sitting in my drafts in a while, combining some old asks

Naga Lord (Leander) x F Maid reader

Word Count: 6K

General Plot: You and your family are staff in the house of a Naga Lord. Things go sideways when your childhood friend's father falls for you mother.

W: Description of murder, yandere behavior, spitting, otherwise sfw soft yandere fluff

More SFW fics here

“Hurry up now,” your mother said brightly as she ladled a bit of porridge into a bowl for you to eat. “Master Dervin will be cross if you're late with his breakfast.” 

Though the two of you were mere servants in the Naga Lord’s home, she always fed you first before you had to do your duties for the morning. 

She glanced up as you scarfed down your breakfast, her eyes warming as they met your father’s. 

“Good morning, my favorite ladies,” he said, kissing her and ruffling your hair. 

“Papa! I have to work!” You pouted, but he just snickered, stealing your spoon and taking a bite of your porridge. 

“Don't bother making yourself neat for that snake bastard,” he chuckled as his hands slid around your mother’s waist. 

“Charles, please. Someone might hear, and we'll be out on the street!” 

He shrugged. As you finished your meal, your mother arranged the morning dishes for the Naga family on a silver cart, taking a moment to smooth and repin your hair before you were to serve them. 

Your father was sure to spit in Dervin’s bowl when your mother looked away, making your eyebrows jump. He put a finger over his lips, winking at you. 

“I'm off to the stable,” he said, grabbing an apple as he went. “Have a nice day, my pretty girls!” 

You blinked at the contaminated bowl, wondering if you should throw it out. 

“What are you staring at?” Your mother chided, pushing the cart towards the door. “Get along; I can hear them coming down the stairs.” 

You hurriedly fixed a pleasant but distant look on your lips as you wheeled the cart into the dining room. 

“Good morning, Mr. Leander,” you said to Dervin's only son, as he was the first to enter the dining room.” 

“You’re radiant this morning as always (Y/N),” he beamed, taking his spot at the table. “but stop calling me ‘mister’ you never used to.” 

Your ears heated as you placed his breakfast in front of him. 

“It's not appropriate, sir. We were children then. You're to be the master of the house and will be married soon. I'm sure your fiancee wouldn’t appreciate-” 

He cut off your words with a sharp hand. 

“Don't speak of unpleasant things,” he grumbled. 

“Apologies, sir.” 

“Stop calling me-” 

The arrival of his mother cut off his own words. She was a lovely Naga, sharing Leander’s white hair and sapphire blue eyes. Like his, her tail was a shocking electric blue.

“Stop prattling with that servant, Leander,” she snapped. “She has work to do. You're bothering her.” 

Mrs. Elanore was not a pleasant woman, but she didn't like you servants to be harassed by the males of the house. Whether it was actual concern or jealousy, you didn't know, but your mother, especially, appreciated it. 

Dervin, her husband, took every opportunity to corner her, trying to ply her with gifts and sweet words. Your mother was having none of it, which is why you delivered their meals, not her, and why your father spit in his food. 

You nodded, thanking Elanore as you served her the tea she liked. 

“Where is that imbecile?” she muttered, referring to her husband. “There are so few things I ask of him, but he can't manage the simplest tasks. He is to arrive on time for every meal. There must be some decorum in this household! 

Her sharp blue eyes flicked to you. 

“Go get him (Y/N).” 

Leander slid in front of you like a vibrant  blue flash before you could even respond. 

“I'll go, mother. (Y/N) has her work, as you said.” 

She gave him a tight nod, and you took the opportunity to finish setting the table for their return. 

“I should fire your family,” Elanore mused. “your father would be happier, don't you think?” 

You glanced up for a moment to find her eyes traveling over your form. 

“You and your mother are too pretty to be maids,” she snorted. “You'll only cause trouble wherever you go.” 

“Our family has served yours for generations,” you muttered, scared she might put you all on the street. “My grandparents died here, and so did theirs.” 

 “Just like a human,” she hissed, baring her teeth. “Servile and obedient. You’d think you’d have found something else to do in all those years.” 

“Apologies, ma’am,” you said, looking at your shoes. 

She waved a dismissive hand at you, sipping her tea. 

“It’s in your nature. There’s nothing to be done. You and your mother are good at your jobs at least.” 

Your cheeks warmed at the backhanded compliment. It was different when Dervin or Leander complimented you. She acknowledged the skill that had been passed through generations, not how you looked. You and your mother knew how to run a house. Your masters needed structure to maintain their dignity. With little to do, they would become depressed slobs if you didn’t keep everything running efficiently.  At least, that’s what your grandmother told you. 

Slithering through the wide doorway, Dervin and Leander settled into their spots at the table, and you took your place in the corner, waiting in case one of them needed something. The two male Nagas looked very similar in their features, handsome with a strong jaw and wide shoulders, but Dervin’s hair was jet black, as were his eyes. They always appeared blank and cold, which frightened you. Elanore wasn’t warm, but her gaze reflected an expressive nature, not a monstrous stillness. 

Your eyes watched him take a bite of his breakfast, trying to hide the disgust that roiled in your stomach. 

“Where’s your mother?” he snapped after a few big bites. 

You didn’t speak at first, your eyes drifting to Elanore for permission. She answered for you. 

“She’s in the kitchen where she ought to be. The servants are my business as the Lady of the house. Don’t bother yourself with their whereabouts.” 

“I pay them,” he barked, but she ignored him, turning her attention to Leander. 

“You’re to visit Iris today, Leander. I’ve purchased a gift for you to bring your fiancee.” 

She snapped her fingers at you, and you hurried to her side to take the small package and walk it around the table to her son. 

“I don’t wish to bring her any gifts,” he snorted, not even taking the gift from your hand. “She’s not my fiancee.” 

Elanore rubbed her temples. 

“The two of you are infuriating, you know that? You have one job, Leander. You have to marry well and produce an heir.” 

She waved a finger at you. 

“You can keep your little maid as a comfort doll if you like, but you will do as I have arranged.” 

“I’m a grown man, mother. I don’t have to do anything.” 

Electricity crackled between their eyes as they engaged in a silent power struggle. You stood awkwardly to the side, still holding the gift. 

“I’m sick of this! I do my very best to advise you two idiots on the proper way to conduct yourselves, and you act like spoiled children!” 

Her tail snapped faster than you could see and struck Leander across the cheek with a crack. Blood dribbled down his pale skin, and his eyes hung on her, the warm blue turning to ice. 

“I should have never married a common husband like you,” she snarled, turning her ire toward Dervin. Vulgarity and Mediocrity are in your blood, and you’ve infected your son!” 

Dervin’s black eyes flashed. 

“My mediocre blood saved your foolish noble family from destitution. Thanks to my benevolence, you are able to live in the house your family has owned for generations. If not for me, you’d be begging on the streets, pleading with your relatives to take you in as a servant.” 

“Fools,” she snarled, picking up her tea and slithering out of the room. 

“Bring your mother to me,” Dervin demanded when she was out of earshot.

You let out a trembling breath as you thought up a lie. 

“She went into town this morning for groceries, sir,” you said, knowing he’d never lower himself to search for her in the kitchen. 

You screamed as the bowl he was eating from sailed across the room, shattering beside your head. 

“Father!” Leander shouted. 

Dervin gave him an amused but cool smirk before turning his attention to you.

“Send her to my room when she returns,” he barked and stormed out. 

You leaned against the wall, panting as you mentally checked yourself for harm. Leander’s warm hands cupped your cheeks, looking you over. 

“Did he hurt you?” he asked. 

Your gazes met, but words wouldn’t come, so you shook your head. 

“Don’t be afraid,” he said, his warm arms wrapping around you and pressing you to his chest. 

You inhaled the spicy scent of the soap he used mixed with his own natural fragrance. 

“I won’t let any harm come to you.” 

When he pulled away, you found yourself looking at your feet, trying to avoid his gaze. 

“Oh, I’m sorry. I dropped the gift,” you muttered, picking up the broken box. 

You plucked the pretty hairpin from the shards of ceramic, seeing it was still whole. 

“I’ll find a new box,” you said, trying to slide around him. 

He stopped you with a hand on your shoulder, curling the other around your fingers. 

“Keep it,” he said. “I’m not marrying Iris. My mother has no say in the matter, despite how she likes to posture.” 

Your gaze shifted to the red slash bisecting his cheek. 

“Let’s get this cleaned for you, sir. It will be a problem if it gets infected.” 

He frowned but followed you to the kitchen. 

“Is everything alright?” your mother asked as you pulled the first aid kit off a shelf. 

“Good morning, zhingha,” Leander said, greeting your mother with a kiss on the cheek.

The word meant “mother” in the Naga’s old language. He had never considered his biological mother his; when he was a boy, he got quite attached to yours. He spent most of his time in the kitchen with you, playing and avoiding Elanore’s tantrums when you were children. The two of you had made the pantry your fort, and you’d put on little shadow plays while you lay on the floor together. 

Your mother’s eyes focused on his wound, and she clucked. 

“Poor thing, come bend down where I can reach you. You’ve grown into such a tall man,” she said, taking the kit from you and pulling out the correct supplies. 

You hopped on the counter, swinging your feet as you watched her disinfect and bandage the cut. 

“What mother in their right mind would do such a thing to their son,” she muttered as she worked. 

She already knew who’d done it because she treated Leander’s wounds often. When she was done, she patted him on the head like when he was a little boy. 

“That’s better.” 

“We should go into town today,” he said. “My father is looking for you.” 

She frowned, a flash of fear streaking across her face. 

“Don’t worry. I’m supposed to be visiting Iris. We can take the carriage, and you can visit with your friends instead. Go have Charles ready it.” 

She nodded, giving him a wan smile before she hurried to find your father. You hopped off the counter and headed to do your chores while your mother was safely out of the house. 

Before you could make it out the door, Leander’s thick, electric blue tail coiled around you. 

“Ah, ah, you’re coming too, saiya,” he cooed, dragging you into his arms. 

Your heart thumped at the silly nickname he’d given you as a child. The word meant “little bear. " When he was young, he was fascinated with your round ears compared to his, which pointed at the end. As they had so often back then, his finger traced the arch of one as he hummed his pleasure. 

“Sir, you shouldn’t,” you whispered, but Leander was too pleased with you in his arms. 

He dipped his head, nibbling at your ear. 

“I should eat you up, sweet little thing,” he whispered, making your body explode in butterflies. 

He carried you out the back door to the stable, where your father was busy arranging the horses to pull the carriage. When he saw you tucked behind Leander’s large biceps, he frowned. 

“Put my daughter down. She’s not your doll,” he said, his tone more curt than he probably should have been with a family member of the house he served.  

Out of only politeness, you were sure, he set you down. Your mother let out a light, silvery giggle, patting your father on the shoulder. 

“Oh, don’t be so strict, Charles,” she said. “He doesn’t mean any harm by it.” 

As Leander tugged you by the hand into the carriage, you heard your Dad lower his voice, so he thought the Naga couldn’t hear. 

“I don’t like those snakes touching her. They are far too familiar. Miss Elanore’s grandfather would never have allowed him to fondle her the way he does. Things were the way they should be when he was around.”

Beside you, Leander snorted, rolling his eyes. 

“He also drove the family to bankruptcy,” he muttered under his breath. 

“Listen,” your father went on as he helped your mother onto the seat next to him, and still unaware you could hear him quite clearly. “I’ve been talking with the Willards about (Y/N).” 

“The Willards?” she asked. “The tailors?” 

“Yes, they have a boy about (Y/N)’s age. Apparently, he has taken an interest in her, and his father approves. He thinks a girl raised as a maid will make a dutiful wife. I think we ought to consider it. We can visit while we’re in town today.” 

You remembered the Willard's son Joshua from when you were sent on errands to pick up clothes for Elanore. He was a handsome young man, though a little on the skinny side. He seemed nice enough. Still, your cheeks burned, and you folded your hands tightly, hearing your parents plot your marriage. 

“I don’t know, dear,” your mother hummed. “Do you really think it’s a good idea?” 

He let out a grunt. 

“I’d do just about anything to get our girl away from that snake. He’s only going to ruin her, string her along, and throw her away when he’s bored. They’re all the same. The Willard’s can give her a good life.” 

You felt Leander stiffen beside you. As the carriage took off, his tail wrapped around you so tight you whimpered. He glanced down, his face darkening to a cool blue. 

“I’m so sorry,” he muttered, loosening his muscles but not letting you go. 

He gently unwrapped the hairpin, clutched in your palm, and busied himself fastening it to your hair. 

“So pretty,” he murmured, greedy eyes eating you up. “I won’t let anyone else touch you (Y/N).” 

You weren’t sure if that was supposed to be comforting. You’d always liked Leander. He was very handsome, and as children, you’d been inseparable. However, you also realized the massive gap between your two worlds. You were just a maid, and he was the only son of a wealthy lord. It wasn’t meant to be. Your father had explained to you many times before that Leander only doted on you because he was immature and unwilling to grow up. He thought he could still play make-believe with your life, and he warned you to be wary of him. 

Feeling raw and confused, you tried to keep your eyes out the window, focused on the passing countryside as you made your way toward town. When your father stopped to park the carriage, he nodded to your mother as you climbed out. 

She held out a hand to you. 

“Darling, I need you to come with me. We’re going to stop at the tailor’s,” she said, carefully avoiding Leander’s gaze. 

He, however, would not be tricked. 

“How convenient. I need to stop there as well,” he said with a grin, tugging you back towards him with his tail. “(Y/N), keep me company as we walk so I don’t get bored.” 

Your father gave him a deep grimace but was silent as he finished tying up the horses and escorted your mother by the arm down the busy avenue, walking a few steps ahead of you. You watched the two of them whisper to one another as you made your way to the Willard’s shop. 

“Greetings!” Marshall Willard said with a grin when he saw you and your parents enter the shop. 

His eyes jumped to the large Naga next you, and he winced just slightly before calling his son.

“Joshua! Come greet our guests. I’ll help the customer.” 

Joshua appeared from the back, giving you a pleasant smile. 

“Mr. and Mrs. (Y/LN). It’s wonderful to see you,” he said politely. “Can I offer you some tea?” 

Meanwhile, his father greeted Leander. 

“Young Lord Szake! What can I help you with this morning?” 

You moved to follow your parents to the kitchen with Joshua, but Leander pulled you back by the shoulders. 

“I’m here to buy (Y/N) some dresses,” he said, pushing you gently in front of him. 

Everyone in the room looked at you, and your cheeks burned. 

“What? Why, my lord?” you stammered. 

He tipped his head at you.

“If you’re to be my personal attendant, you can’t follow me around in threadbare wool dresses. You ought to represent the Szake family well.” 

“Personal attendant?” you parroted, confused. “But I’m just a maid.” 

“Not anymore,” he declared. “Every Lord has a personal attendant to handle the paperwork and their calendar…those sorts of things.” 

“But isn’t that normally a man?” Mr. Willard asked. 

Leander beamed at him, a cold smile full of hate. 

“(Y/N) has known me since I was just a child. She knows everything about me. I wouldn’t dare trust anyone else with my personal affairs.” 

Your father frowned. 

“Nonsense,” he barked. “(Y/N) is going to be married and have a domestic life, as she should. You’re a wealthy Lord; I’m sure you can find a qualified candidate.” 

Joshua nodded beside him. You looked up at Leander, eyes large. 

“I can’t be your personal attendant, sir,” you added. “It’s not proper. What will people think?” 

He smirked at you, his long, strong fingers pinching your chin so you had to look at him. 

“Fine…If your father insists you have a domestic life, you shall.” 

Your shoulders wilted with relief, and you let out a breath. 

“Oh, thank goo-” 

“As my wife.” 

Everyone in the room’s eyes were as wide as saucers. 

“What?!” they all said at once. 

Leander gave Mr. Willard another bitterly cold grin. 

“Measure her for dresses fitting the station of a Lord’s fiancee.” 

“Absolutely not!” your father said.

“Lord Szake will never allow of this!” Mr. Willard pointed out. 

“She’s to be my fiancee!” Joshua hissed, taking an incensed step towards Leander. “My father has already approved it!” 

Leander’s gaze shot to him, danger reflected in his irises. 

“There are not words on this plane to describe how little I care about whatever arrangement your families have worked out. (Y/N) will marry me, and you will dress her properly.” 

He sank into his coils, pushing you in front of Mr. Willard, snapping his fingers. 

“Now.” 

You saw the man’s jaw tick, but refusing Leander’s request would only be bad for his business, so he pulled out his measuring tape and approached you. Not sure what was happening, you gave him a pleading look, begging him to say something. Reading your confusion and fear, his stare shifted to one more gentle. 

“Lift your arms, please, miss,” he said quietly. 

The room was dead silent while he did as he was told. Joshua and your father glared at Leander, who seemed entirely unbothered, while your mother appeared uncertain. You watched her suck in a deep breath, straightening her shoulders before she approached the Naga, speaking in hushed tones. 

“Sir, are you sure this is wise? I’m not opposed to this match. I-I know…I can see you love her…I’m only worried for (Y/N)’s safety. Such arrangements between classes rarely work out well. Your fellow nobles will never accept her. Would you subject her to their cruelty?” 

For a moment, he seemed to be considering her words, eyes sliding to you. 

“My family has never been accepted into our peers good graces. You know my father was a common merchant. My mother married him out of desperation. She traded her noble title for his fortune. People’s opinions are only that. Opinions. (Y/N) and I will face the same prejudices together. Do you wish your daughter to continue her life as a maid or-?” 

He gave Joshua a dirty look. 

“Or become a servant to a husband who can never love her as I can?” 

Your mother sighed. She lifted her hand and smoothed a bit of hair that had come out of place as if he were her own son. 

“Please…for me, be serious about this if it is what you intend to do.” 

He tipped his cheek into her palm. 

“I will never betray your daughter zhingha.” 

Your father let out a strangled noise, marching out the front door, slamming it behind him. 

Joshua, who had been pacing in place, stomped over to you, grabbing you by the arm to face him. 

“Is this what you really want (Y/N)? A snake for a husband?” 

Before you could answer, Leander’s tail shot out, jerking him away from you and tossing him into the wall. 

“Don’t touch her!” 

The young man climbed to his feet, clutching his ribs. 

“You nobles can’t just take whatever you like! (Y/N) belongs with us!” 

Leander slid across the room like an elegant blue river, lifting Joshua up by his throat. 

“Do not address my fiancee by her first name again. If I see your eyes on her, I will gouge them out!” 

Joshua’s furious face told you he didn’t plan to back down. His father dropped the measuring tape, hurrying to rescue his son. 

“Of course, he wont’ My Lord,” he said. “You’ve made your intentions quite clear. Yes, Joshua?” 

He gave Leander another long look before he gave in. 

“As you say, My Lord.” 

Leander dropped him, returning to his seat near you, and jerked his head at the tailor. 

“Continue,” he snarled. 

“Go to the back and help your mother,” Mr. Willard said to his son.

Joshua gave you a last lingering glance before he disappeared. 

–

You arrived back at the mansion in a very different dress than when you'd left. Leander had insisted on buying you and your mother matching readymade dresses from the shop window while you waited for the fourteen others he ordered to be made. The soft peach satin fabric was the nicest thing you’d ever worn. 

The first thing you heard as you walked in the black door was the smashing of ceramic. 

“Stay here,” Leander said. 

Your eyes quickly flicked to your mother, who grabbed your hand and pulled you into the pantry, peeking out through a crack in the door. 

“Father?” Leander called, opening the door to the dining room. 

He ducked as a vase flew past, smashing to pieces on the stove.

“That bitch!” You heard him screaming. 

He shoved past his son, dark eyes jerking around the room. 

“Father! Calm down! What's happened?” 

“Where is the human woman?” he snarled. 

You and your mother slipped back into the shadows, trying to be as silent as mice. 

“Father! She’s not back from shopping yet. Please, tell me what’s happened.” 

His eyes narrowed, but seemed satisfied with his answer. 

“It’s your mother,” he snarled. “She’s gone.” 

“Gone?” 

He bared his fangs at his son. 

“Don’t parrot me like a dumb animal. The damn woman left! She stole the gold in the safe and disappeared! No one’s seen her!” 

He paced on his thick tail. 

“She must have paid off the townsfolk. No one will tell me where she’s gone!” 

“Has she made off with our fortune?” 

His father glanced up at him. 

“Of course not; I keep the majority of our money in the bank. Only you and I can access it. I planned for this possibility but never expected her to do it! She only got off with our emergency fund…but it was enough to live well for a long time. When will the human woman return?” 

“I don’t know, father,” he said. “But whatever you need, I can help you with it.” 

He waved a clawed hand. 

“I don’t need anything done! I’m going to marry the woman. I should never have agreed to marry Elanore. I won’t make that mistake again. An obedient human wife will suit me better.” 

Leander let out a cold chuff. 

“She’s already married, father!” 

“Easily fixed,” he hissed with murder in his eyes. 

“You can’t be serious!” 

He tried to push past his son toward the door leading out to the stable. Leander blocked his way, his icy irises determined. 

“I can’t let you do that, Father,” he said, his tone low and even. 

Your father came marching through the door a moment later, unaware of the drama playing out. He froze where he stood, eyes immediately focused on the two Naga, staring one another down. 

The opportunity in front of him was too tempting for Dervin to resist, and his tail shot out, a victorious smile on his lips. You couldn’t stay the scream that erupted from your throat, your mother rushing past you to protect her husband. 

Dervin’s focus shifted to her, and Leander lunged at the same second. Caught off guard, he threw his father to the floor, and they quickly became a writhing ball of tails and arms. 

“You’d betray me too, son?” he gasped as he tried to overpower Leander. 

You smelled the coppery stench of blood as sharp nails scraped each other's skin. More than willing to help, your father picked up a heavy cast iron skillet, making his way around the hissing Naga, quiet on his feet. 

There was a resounding crunch as the skillet descended on Dervin’s head. He flopped to the floor, limp. Blood leaked in a pool around him, but he still dragged in a wet breath. Before anyone else could move, Leander snatched a kitchen knife from the rack, jamming it through his chest. Dervin let out his gurgling last breath and then was still. 

You and your mother clutched one another, sinking to the floor. Neither of you knew what to say or do, but your father and Leander didn’t need any prompting. 

“Help me with him,” your father said, slipping his arms under the dead Naga’s. “We’ll bury him under the pig pens.” 

Leander grunted his assent, lifting the majority of the weight as they maneuvered the body outside. 

“Come,” your mother whispered, trembling. “The blood.” 

You nodded, filling the mop bucket with water before pulling every towel from the cabinet to mop up the mess. 

“What now?” you found yourself whispering, though there was no reason to. 

She shrugged. 

“That’s for Leander to decide. He’s the Lord of this house.” 

By the time they returned, you’d scrubbed everything to a sparkle, the only blood left staining your new dresses and the towels.

“Take those off,” your father said. “We’ll burn the linens.” 

The two of you nodded, slipping the heavy dresses over your shoulders until you only wore the thick shifts underneath. Leander helped you out of your shoes and slipped the red-splattered stockings off your feet. 

Your father gave you and Leander a long look before he spoke. 

“Take your fiancee to bed,” he said. “She shouldn’t have seen all this. I trust it won’t happen again.”  

Leander returned a tight nod, and something passed between their gazes. They’d forged a silent agreement. 

It wasn’t until your mother and father left out the back door to burn the rest of the evidence that the tears came. It was a relief Dervin was gone. He would have killed your father and hurt your mother, but it was still horrific. 

“Shhh,” Leander hummed, scooping you up in his arms. 

He carried you upstairs to his bedroom, curling into a tight ring to settle you in the center. His arms wrapped around you, and he pressed your head into his chest. 

“Everything is going to be okay now,” he said softly, carding the strands of your hair with his long fingers. 

“Lei, are we all going to jail?” you sniffled, his childhood nickname falling past your lips all on its own. 

He chuckled, his eyes sparkling when they met yours. 

“No. My mother did us a favor. If anyone asks, they’re touring the countryside until they're entirely forgotten.” 

“What happens now?” you asked. 

He tipped your chin with his thumb, dipping his head to slip his lips against yours. They were so warm that you felt your jaw's tension melt away. His eyes searched yours when they parted, carrying a lightness you hadn’t seen in many years. 

“I’m going to marry you, and your parents will move out of the servant’s quarters. Your father and mother have earned their place in the Szake family. We’ll find some new staff.” 

You nodded, his hair forming a smooth curtain blocking the world. 

“Sleep now,” he hummed. “All is as it should be.” 

Despite how you wanted to keep your eyes open, they slid shut against your will. 

—

“Would you like lavender or rose tea, Miss (Y/N)?” your new maid asked as she opened the tea box in front of you. 

“Rose,” you said, turning your attention back to the catalog in front of you. 

You sat comfortably in the rose garden, enjoying the sunshine as you planned your wedding. It had been a month since the terrible night that Dervin died. When Leander had informed the merchants of the town that he was getting married, they’d sent piles of samples and booklets for you to look through. You’d never realized there were so many options! It was a little overwhelming. Since you’d come from humble beginnings, it felt strange spending so much money on decorations and lace, but Leander informed you it should be a grand occasion and not to spare a cent. 

“Um…Miss (Y/N)?” one of your maids said, looking slightly frightened. 

“What’s wrong, Lily?” you asked, concerned. 

“Well…there’s a Miss Iris at the door looking for you. Should I bring her?” 

Leander was out for the day, meeting with one of his importers, so you weren’t sure what she could want. 

“Of course, bring her here.” 

A minute later, an elegant Naga came slithering into the garden. Her curly violet hair was pinned in a pretty updo and she wore an elaborate pink dress, covered in ribbons. 

“Hello, Miss Iris,” you said, waving for her to take a place at the table. “Can I offer you some tea?” 

Her brow was drawn, and she looked you up and down. 

“So…you’re who he picked,” she pouted. “Over me.” 

Your ears burned, realizing you were speaking to Leander’s former fiancee. 

“There’s no competition,” you said. 

She snorted. 

“Obviously not.” 

She narrowed her eyes at you, and you expected a verbal lashing. You were a mere maid, after all. It was absurd Leander would take you as his fiancee. She sucked in a deep breath, and her expression suddenly softened. 

“How…How did you do it?” 

Your eyebrows jumped, confused. 

“Do what?” 

She looked around, uncomfortable. 

“Can I tell you a secret?”

You took a breath as your maid politely poured her a cup of tea. 

“I suppose so…If you’d like.” 

“I’m relieved.” 

“Relieved…why?” 

She sipped her tea, thinking before she spoke. 

“Because I don’t particularly care for Leander. In fact, I don’t like him at all. He’s…very…intense. He kind of creeps me out. He only spoke of you when we were out on dates; it was incredibly boring and awkward. Not to mention…the way he talked about you…He was fixated on all of your little ticks. Did you know he carries a lock of your hair around with him? And sometimes your stockings! He showed up one day elated because you’d accidentally sneezed on him and used his handkerchief to wipe your nose! He was cuddling it like a treasure!” 

Your ears heated. Where had he gotten a lock of your hair? You’d never given it to him. 

“He what?” 

Iris waved her previous statement away. 

“Anyway, I wouldn’t have liked him even if he hadn’t. He’s just…too much like a Naga male. Once they have something in their mind, they get…obsessed. 

Our parents arranged our marriage. I hate that tradition. I’d never force my child into a marriage without love. That’s how you get murdered by some enterprising mistress!” 

You blinked, unsure if you should be offended or not, but she went on.  

“Honestly, there’s…someone else who has my interest. Only…he’s not a noble Naga.” 

“Oh! That is a puzzle, isn’t it?” 

She nodded, stretching her hand across the table to touch yours. 

“That’s why I need to know how you did it! How did you win over Leander’s parents? Maybe if I can tell Joshua how to do it, I can…I don’t know…” 

You giggled. 

“Joshua…Willard?” 

Her violet irises flared. 

“You know him?” 

“Ah…yes…but not well. He seems like a very nice man.” 

Her eyes glazed over, wistful thoughts playing in her mind. 

“He’s so kind and considerate. I’ve never met anyone like him, so gentle. A few weeks ago, I went to pick up a dress, and he helped me. His hands were so soft, and his voice was so sweet. Every night since then, we’ve been meeting in secret! I know he’s the right one and he thinks so too! 

I don’t want to brute of a husband. I want a kind person who I can talk to. That’s why I have to know how to convince my parents not to marry me off to some…stranger!” 

You weren’t sure how to answer. 

“I think…You should do whatever you must to protect your beloved,” you said. “I can’t tell you exactly what to do because it will be different for you. We’re all different in different circumstances.

She looked a little disappointed. 

“What I do know, though, Iris, is that if you love one another, you will find a way You two are adults, not children. No one can make you marry someone you don’t want to. It’s only a matter of how far you are willing to go, what sacrifices you will make to have the life you want.” 

She nodded, thinking. 

“But…” you started, pausing to sip your tea, “What if your parents went on a little vacation?” 

“A vacation?” 

You shrugged. 

“Once you’re married, you’re married,” you said. “Maybe by the time they return…if they return… you’ve sorted your affairs.” 

The two of you shared a knowing look, and she brightened. 

“I like you (Y/N), you’re very clever! You’ve given me hope! Is there anything I can help you with in return? I want us to be friends!” 

You smiled, picking up one of the catalogs. 

“Yes, actually. I have no idea what is proper for a lady. Can you help me? We can plan our weddings together.” 

She beamed at you, taking the catalog. 

“Of course!” 

A few hours later, Leander came slithering through the garden. 

“Iris? What are you doing here?” he asked, his shoulders stiffening. “I thought I made it clear…” 

Iris snorted and waved him away. 

“I’m not here for you,” she said, raising her nose at him. “(Y/N) and I are planning our weddings.” 

“Your wedding?” he asked, and she grinned. 

“Yes! And now that you’re here,” she wrinkled her nose at him. “I think I’ll be off.” 

She leaned down and kissed your cheek. 

“Thank you for your advice (Y/N). I’m going to talk to Joshua,” she said before sliding past Leander without saying goodbye. 

“What was that all about?” Leander asked when she was gone. 

You shrugged. 

“True love, I guess.” 

He pulled you into his coils, peeking over your shoulder at the catalogs on the table. He ran a finger over the things you’d circled. 

“Lei, can I ask you something?” you asked. 

“Anything, love.” 

You twisted around to look at him, narrowing your eyes. 

“Did you tell Iris that you were excited I sneezed on you?” 

“Ah…noooo,” he lied, his whole face darkening to a deep blue. “Wh-Why would she say something silly like that?” 

You giggled. 

“Of course not,” you said, patting his chest. “I must have misheard her. Can I borrow your handkerchief? It's a little warm out here.” 

He passed it to you and you daintily patted your forehead, handing it back. His eyes widened at the little scrap of fabric in his hand and he hastily stuck it in his jacket pocket. 

Leander might be a weirdo, but he was your weirdo and you wouldn't have it any other way. 

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My dear Charlie

Succubus Tailor Headcannons —º•º•º•º•º•

At first he doesn’t take much interest in you when you first move into their town, taking you as just another resident he can consume when wanted.

He knows the other nonhuman residents of this monstrous town will consume you in less than a few days, they have no self restraint and have always gotten rid of humans as soon as they came.

But as he sees that all residents have taken a liking to you, he starts to regret not claiming you the second you came here. Why, you’re the perfect muse! With everyone liking you, of course they’d buy whatever you wear.

The town and its residents often visit the tailor, but now they visit even more ever since you started to go there.

He takes every chance he gets to caress and touch you. “Oh, dearest, it’s just to check your size!” Is the best excuse he can come up with whilst caressing your waist and engraving the size of it in his mind.

As said before, he’s visualized you in countless outfits, including wedding and provocative ones. He even stays up at night designing perfect outfits for you that he knows would look wonderous on you.

Vampire Lawyer Brothers Headcannons—ºº•ºº•ºº

The two brothers are very possessive, and if not for their curse of not being allowed to enter your abode without permission, you would’ve already been in their manor.

Surprisingly, they’re very gentle and understanding, as much as they are manipulative and deadly.

Their charms are deceiving, and don’t fall for it one bit, lest you find yourself trapped underneath the two in the middle of the night.

Countless times, they’ve stalked you at your job and at the other little adventures you’d go on throughout the quaint town.

You’ve woken up to soft knocks on the window thousands of times just to see the twins standing there, watching you intently.

They’ve offered you blood countless times as a way to court you, but it never works because you’re a human and don't drink blood.

They are both very successful lawyers, ones you could turn to if you need a little help with getting out of trouble. They’re very persistent on you asking for their assistance.

They might even go lengths to frame you just for you to ask them to represent you in your court. Not like you’d need it, however.

Anthropomorphic Moth Judge Headcannons —º••º•º••º

As said earlier , you won’t be needing help in court, because the judge too is obsessed with you!!

He lets you get away with so many crimes, it’s unbelievable; fraud, tax evasion , loitering , speeding tickets , assault , robbery , disorderly conduct , murder , all of it.

He brushes them off as accidents, the most jail time he’s ever given you was 5 hours in a holding cell.

Even so, the jury are also obsessed; their beady eyes always trained on you and seeing the greatness in your mere essence.

At the mention of your presence, it’s as if all of their antennae perk simultaneously. They can’t help it!! They get so excited when you’re around.

Any other person that goes against you in court will probably be getting jail time, for a reason that the jury and judge made up together.

People have always suspected that the jury had been tampered with, the judge too , and their suspicions are correct. But they weren’t paid , no no, they’re just enamored by your mere presence.

And safe to say that if you ever go to jail, your bail will be paid within seconds. Courtesy of the jury, of course.

Zombie Trashman Headcannons —ºº•ºº•ºº

The man is quite literally a hunk of meat; with those decaying muscles taking out trash and picking you up is no stress whatsoever.

He can’t speak coherent English, but that doesn’t stop him from expressing his emotions through physical actions. It hasn’t been one second where he hasn’t touched you every time he has come around your block.

From holding your waist whenever you speak to him , to grabbing a fistful of your hair and making you look up at him whilst you speak, his actions are most of the time misunderstood.

He comes off as aggressive sometimes, but he’s in all reality being gentle with you. Only you, however.

Whenever another resident is being disrespectful toward you, he intentionally dumps their trash on their yard and doesn’t pick it up.

He will be petty just for you, that’s a given.

He rummages around trash for rotting or raw meat, just for snacks. Though, ever since you found out this information you’ve started to leave little packages of raw meat near the trash bins just for him.

He takes this as a sign that you want to be his mate, so he drops off sweet little gifts as well.

He counts them as wedding gifts.

Archangel Priest Headcannons —ººº‹ººº‹ººº

Forgive him father for he has sinned.

The second he laid his eyes on you, he forgot all rules of being an angel above. He’s started to become more corrupt, allowing you to get away with things most do not.

He’d always remind you of how much of a sinner you were, even if you were doing something mundane, even though you didn’t know what you had done to wrong him.

But he knew. He knew exactly.

You knew what you were doing; enticing him in such a way that he had lost faith in his lord and savior.

You had clouded his thoughts and averted him from his path to holiness.

Soon enough, he had become so obsessed that he had started to see you as his god, losing all faith in the one he had praised so dearly once.

He’s found himself accountable for multiple disappearances of people who hadn’t adored you like he has.

The last thing they ever see is the light of death.

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