We Need To Forgive Ourselves For All The Things We Didnt Do. All The Things We Should Have Done. You

“We… need to forgive ourselves… for all the things we didn’t do. All the things we should have done. You can’t get stuck on the regrets of what should have happened.”

— Mitch Albom

where my mind has been as of late

I am never happy, I am only ever distracted, at varying degrees, from a persistent sadness.

-penned by j. m. medna (2024)

I want too much and nothing at all

- penned by j. medna (2024)

someone show jeongguk this

K.E.N-Digit: ‘Hand Signs of Love’ (2019)

At some point you realize that not even your own mother will accept you for who you are. For all your shadow and darkness and hatred and impurity.

Like everyone else, she sees only what she wishes to see. A perfect child born from her womb and raised through her love. It’s an infraction to even consider they could have raised them wrong, could have raised a monster. Don’t show your faults lest you anger the master.

Take your truth and burry it down, somewhere in the graveyard of your heart. No one would know anyhow.

Rehearse your platitudes and repeat the same old saccharine words that everyone loves to hear. No one ever really wants to sit with your fears and doubts and talk them through with you. No one ever really wants to be discomforted, distracted from their own protagonistic narrative to attend to yours.

Swallow it. Smile. Try not to say too much. Be perfect.

Nothing matters anyways.

I’m just going to live in silence. I’m only going to be true when alone with myself. I’m the only one who accepts it all; the good, the bad, the in-between.