I Might Have Something For You Then--

I might have something for you then--

"It's gonna be you or me, Daniel." he whispers, his voice so fucking close. I was beginning to think his knife was more than a courtesy, and the heaving of his chest right behind me made it difficult to focus. Warm, wet blood, slowly dripping down my neck; he was a master of his art, truly, and my limbs grew weak as my weight shifted onto him. His breath, his heartbeat, my favourite sounds, he's warm through all these layers and--

"Raph~" I trace my fingertips along his jaw, underneath his blush. He was cute. "I can't." his earthquake of a growl, deep and soft, surrendering. He halts, taking in my smell, licking off the blood. He's mine, and he knows it, beautifully mine, with me wincing in pleasure, the promise to be good. We will ruin us, someday, but it will have been for love.

i think having a sharp object held to my throat can be very very romantic. intimate. sexy, even. this is because i am normal.

A fantasy world with an industrial revolution, where Gods are hunted like whales were.

People against piracy fail to realize that no, I can’t just ‘buy it.’ They stopped making DVDs and Blu-Rays. They’re barely offering digital copies for download. I am not spending money I could use for food or bills to pay for a subscription service just so I can always have access to a beloved piece of media. Especially not when the service will remove media on a whim without concern for how the loss of access to that piece will make its artistic conservation nigh impossible.

For example, I recently learned that Disney+ had an original film called Crater. It’s scifi, family friendly, and seems cool - I would love to buy it as a holiday gift for my little brother! But: it’s exclusive to D+ and THEY REMOVED IT LITERALLY MONTHS AFTER ITS RELEASE.

The ONLY way I can directly access this film is through piracy. The ONLY available ‘copies’ of this film are hosted on piracy websites. Disney will NEVER release it in theaters, or as something to buy, and it may NEVER return to the streaming service. It will be LOST because we aren’t allowed to purchase it for personal viewing. If I can’t pay to own it, I won’t pay for the privilege of losing it when corporate decides to put it in a vault.

So yes, I’m going to pirate and support piracy.

This reminds me of the determination I had to learn if I wanted to heal.

I will build a home.

I will rebuild and rebuild, time and time again. Even if it's hard sometimes. And it's working.

Home with a Capital h

I will build a Home,

Where the walls aren't always listening,

Where the silence isn't born of rage and hurt and all the emotions left unsaid,

But of a peace, only those who are true to themselves can have.

I will build a Home,

With all the space my kids will need to grow into themselves,

And some to spare.

I will build a Home,

With the doors always open for you,

A cup of coffee for your worst day,

For when you can't face the world,

I'll be your shield when you have to rest and hide from your demons.

I will build a Home

With all the patience you taught me,

And all the happiness I've learned to share.

– Evyona Gray

In a year we’re going to look back and realize we were too hard on ourselves just like we do every year and curse ourselves for not learning the gentle hand of our grandmother and how her view of us never changed even when she saw the worst of us she still remembers we are still that sweet child she met so many years ago