You Young Vampires Will Never Understand How Good You Have It These Days. Back In My Day, We Had To Drink

“You young vampires will never understand how good you have it these days. Back in my day, we had to drink blood with radium and asbestos in it, and we liked it.” “Okay, grandpa.” “I mean, we glowed in the dark for WEEKS after that, and we never complained.” “Okay, grandpa.”

follow forthefuns for more funny stuff

writers be like; anyone gonna write this story? and then not wait for an answer. and then not write it either

Send this to all your favorite moots and pass the pumpkin round! KEEP THE PUMPKIN TRAIN GOING 🎃🖤🎃🖤🎃 :)))

Punkin??? I’m honored!!

Don't you worry about my pronouns. My pronouns are pretty standard. Worry about my adverbs. My most frequent ones are "omniously", "haphazardly" and "obliviously".

is anyone else constantly afraid they’ll be “caught” doing stuff they’re obviously allowed or even supposed to do