Harry: I Think Malfoy Was Created For The Soul Purpose Of Making Me Miserable.

Harry: I think Malfoy was created for the soul purpose of making me miserable.

Hermione: [sarcastically] Yes. Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy decided to have a baby, not to produce their pureblood heir and have a family but to put a force on this planet to make Harry James Potter as miserable as possible.

Harry: So you get it then! Perfect!

Hermione: [incredulously] Really? THAT is what you took from that?

Harry:

Hermione: [sighs] I'll just add this incident to the list of reasons Ron and I think you're in love with him and move on with my life.

Lol wut

when dumbledore dies he catches fire and a tiny naked dumbledore is reborn from the flames like a phoenix 

Inter-House Friendships #3

Hufflepuff: *swimming and splashing around*

Gryffindor: *diving and flipping off the docks*

Ravenclaw: *floating quietly on a conjured raft*

Slytherin: *lying immobile face down in the water*

the most iconic harry potter character is easily blaise zabini’s mother who was so beautiful she got away with murdering each of her seven husbands, all of whom had left her their fortunes when they died. by the time husband #3 died, it was probably really obvious she had a hand in their deaths and yet! four more men decided she was worth it! four more dudes decided dying was an ok sacrifice for her! lmao she is just as iconic as helen of troy, perhaps even more so 

worst traits of the houses

gryffindor: gets too heated in discussions because they're passionate and will fight u on their opinion. hIDE

hufflepuff: will also fight u but is smol

slytherin: most likely to make awful ur mom jokes

ravenclaw: HELLO NAUGHTY CHILDREN IT IS DISCOURSE TIME

me as a history teacher in 20 years

me: so i said yesterday we'd be talking about wars

me: and since today is may 2nd im gonna be talking about a very special one

me: the battle of hogwarts