Springthings - Lightly, Lightly—

the confirmed allie fleur method to stop crying or being angry is to spell 'be like a duck let it roll off of your back'

i love you

        her journal? willow's journal? if she weren't drooping, she might've gasped, comically and oversized and so, so genuine. she wasn't sure if she had a way to describe willow and her writing, she doesn't think she had the words anywhere inside her, but she imagines that willow does. she's filled with words, maybe in the way that allie is filled with flowers. but allie doesn't garden the way willow writes. willow doesn't tend to her sentences, her desires. sometimes, she wonders if willow's words tend to her.

        she thinks of that book, that book that made allie's heart turn so severely she felt as if she could never eat again, and at the same time like she had to stay with willow forever or she might just wither away. allie, not willow, would wither. willow was strong enough to write about it, but allie wasn't and could never be. even the feeling that crept from those pages felt paralytic. clearly, willow wasn't the one that needed her.

        but that kind of sick- that kind of sick isn't a person, it's possessing, and it's scary, but it's not a person. and it's not willow's fault, nor is it true. but even if it was, it wouldn't be.

        she cradles willow in her arms, twining around her and tangling fingers in her hair. " i know you, i love you, i like you, and i'll like you for always, i don't care what she said. you're- you're not sick. you- you were just- it- i don't understand. i don't understand. what was sick? you were just- it was just- it was just a thing. things happen and you- you got caught up and you couldn't get out, that's not sick. "

“ unpossession. ”

Willow whimpers, the guilt incomparable. She can't help that she's like this, she tells herself, she was born with it. This dark cloud. Over the years it's cultivated itself into a storm that follows her, cold winds pushing everything far away from her -- But Allie's staying, Allie is clinging on, Allie is so desperate to bring the sun back when Willow can't even remember the last time she saw it.

"Taylor read my journal," Her voice cracks, she realises how childish she sounds. But it's all she can say to stop apologising for how she's made Allie feel. "I had to run away. She knew everything. She made me-- she made me feel so ashamed."

Allie wouldn't, though, would she? She wouldn't understand it either, but that would be better than Taylor betraying her trust and choosing to take it all in the worst light. Taking it all in bad faith. Willow bows her head, pressing her wet face against Allie's neck, throwing her arms around her body.

"Like if anybody really knew me... they wouldn't like me anymore, I-- I was happy, before. She said I was sick. I-- I thought I was free. I felt free--"

now whys it kinda giving.....

@riagan.

        " you're the prince? " she says, dreamily, leaning forward with her hands holding up her head. her hands, the only thing holding up her head. dizzyness has enveloped her like a hug, something warm and tender and familiar. " they don't even make princes in people land! you're, like, so cool. "