Im Proud Of You - IM SOBBING STOP -

im proud of you - IM SOBBING STOP -

to love and be loved | jeon wonwoo

SYNOPSIS. in which wonwoo tells you about his first (and only) love. PAIRING. jeon wonwoo x gn!reader GENRE. fluff, hurt/comfort, friends to lovers WARNINGS. self-doubt talk on reader's end, self-indulgent wooweee, this was painfully hard to write lmao n have no idea if any of this makes sense WORD COUNT. 1.6k

requested from anon: Hiiiiiiii first of all congratssss for you 2k. For the event, ive been thinking the same exact story with wonwoo and #6 from list 3 - #6: “You’re not hard to love, nor are you unlovable. You just… Need to let me in, and let me show you you’re just as worthy of love as anyone else is.”

notes: i'd quite literally do anything to have these kinds of talks with wonwoo ☹️☹️. anyway i hope u all enjoy this <3 hits close to home >< tysm anon hehe <3

join the 2k celebration!

"Hey, uh, Wonwoo?"

"Mhm?"

"...have you ever been in love?"

A cricket chirps into the evening air right after you ask, and you suddenly feeling like you're holding in a long-winded breath. Then you hear a loud crunch by Wonwoo from the crackers he was snacking on, and you blink up to him wiping away the corner of his mouth. There's the slightest glimpse of a curve to his lips that you manage to catch.

He silently offers you a cracker in your direction, the anticipating silence between the two of you growing thickly. You take the cracker from his hand, muttering a quiet thanks, before nibbling on it absentmindedly.

The night is absolutely beautiful right now, swearing that you could spot and make out the constellations above if you squinted hard enough. The distant chirping of crickets is the only sound that breaks the silence as the coolness of the night rolls in, carrying with it slight breeze that whispers through the leaves overhead the balcony of your apartment.

"I have."

You swiftly turn your head to him, eyes widening intriguingly. "You have?"

The chuckle that leaves him is somewhat awkward, a tad bit hesitant. He crumples up the bag of crackers and sets it aside, chugging down the last sips of his drink and setting down the empty can as well.

"Did you... ever confess to them?" You ask, suddenly feeling curious, though there's a bit of disappointment at the tip of your tongue.

You swear you could see the thoughts swirling around his head. Wonwoo keeps his eyes fixed up to the night sky. There's a distant look in his eyes, as though he's peering into some past moment that only he can see, before he shakes his head, a faint smile crossing over his lips.

"No, I didn't," he answers calmly. "They were too far away, so... I just chose to admire them from afar."

You lean back against the wall behind, your shoulder momentarily brushing against his. "Did they know you?"

Wonwoo purses his lips together. "Mhm."

"Well, you missed your chance!" You exclaim, prodding him playfully with your elbow. "I can't believe you let them get away, dude. Like right through the little cracks of your fingers. You could've been in a relationship by now."

This earns you a low, playful scoff from Wonwoo. "Are you assuming that they loved me back?"

Immediately, you feel the heat crawl up your neck and to the tips your ears.

"Well, um... Yeah, I am," You admit sheepishly, letting out a small sigh. "I mean, who wouldn't fall for a guy like you? You're nice and... charming. I think anyone would be lucky to be loved by you."

There's a silence that falls between the two of you, one simply more than just comfortable yet denser than ever, because the thought of being loved by Wonwoo seems to linger longer than you notice. You steal a glance at him, seeing his face still turned upwards towards the night sky and the moonlight reflecting on his glasses. Strands of his dark hair blow across his forehead in the breeze. You can't quite decipher his expression, but a flicker of something𑁋perhaps surprise, maybe even amusement𑁋dances on his features for a brief moment.

He finally turns back to you, a small, hesitant smile playing on his lips. "You think so?"

"Yeah," You confirm, nodding lightly. "Absolutely."

Wonwoo still keeps his eyes on you as you glance away, seeing the way you fidget with your hands in your lap and smoothing out the creases in your pants nervously. He glances down at his own hand and back at yours, lips pursing together in contemplation, but only folds his fingers back together the second you reach over him to grab the crumpled-up bag of crackers. He feels a little bit too warm in his sweater right now.

"Are you okay?" he asks.

A crunch echoes through the air. Then another. And another.

"I've just been kinda... thinking a lot lately, I guess," You reply slowly, quietly. "And it sort of makes me sound desperate in a way, but there are times I just wonder if, um... if anyone has ever felt the same way about me."

Wonwoo tilts his head slightly. "Love?"

"Not just love, but... seeing me, you know?" Being able to talk about this out loud makes your chest feel heavy. "Since it's hard these days to find someone who sees you for who you are, not for who you can be. I... I just feel like I'm hard to love sometimes. Hell, maybe even unlovable. It’s hard to break out of that mindset when things get hard again.”

A thoughtful quietness seeps through the nighttime breeze, which sends goosebumps up and down your skin, but you don't mind it because you know that Wonwoo is listening either way. And the more you think about it𑁋the thought of knowing that he's here, with his presence is right next to you𑁋it seems to comfort you more than you notice.

There's a small hum of acknowledgement that you hear from his end, unsure if it's just your imagination or if he's actually responding as your mind feels a little jumbled up right now. But then Wonwoo shifts beside you, his arm lightly pressing against yours.

"But I... I think I've reached a point in time where I can say I love myself a little more than a few years ago, or last year, or even just yesterday," You continue to ramble a bit aimlessly, chuckling dryly to yourself. "It’d be nice to share that with someone too, you know? To finally get over this loneliness. But it's not entirely a sad loneliness or a happy one. It's, like, uh... both put together, I guess."

A few moments of silence pass. You feel Wonwoo gently nudge your leg with his.

"I'm proud of you."

You peer up to look at him, mind nearly going blank from the way he's gazing at you. Or maybe it's just the moonlight that's making him appear so... picturesque. "What for?"

"For loving yourself, silly," Wonwoo muses almost cheekily, and the delighted tone that you catch makes your stomach leap. "Even if it's just by a small percentage than yesterday, it's still okay. You're doing good. I want you to know that."

You're doing good. It's just those three singular words that has heat forming in your eyes that you somehow manage to blink back before anything could spill, and hearing it come from Wonwoo feels different. There's a vulnerable sweetness to them, a sincerity that catches you off-guard. You force a smile𑁋a grateful one, nonetheless𑁋before it shifts into a frown.

And Wonwoo catches it right away. "What's wrong?"

Your lips form a thin line, pressing together in thought. You refuse to acknowledge why you think your heart feels slightly... jealous.

"I hope whoever you loved before knows how lucky they are one day," You say to him. "if you're still in love with them, that is..."

Wonwoo stills for a minute, pensively. "I am."

"You are?"

"I never stopped."

You stare at him for a few moments, an eyebrow lifted in disbelief at him, before crossing your arms together and letting out a small, incredulous laugh. "Then you should've said that you're in love with them, idiot."

Wonwoo sucks in a breath.

"I'm in love with you."

You blink instinctively, once, twice, three times, momentarily thinking that Wonwoo's presence might somehow disappear into thin air. But he's still there𑁋a certain softness in the way he's looking at you, a gentleness that seems to wrap around you like a warm embrace𑁋waiting for you. His words suspend heavily in the air, and maybe the world is also holding its breath just as you are too.

"And... You're not hard to love, nor are you unlovable. You're far from that," Wonwoo continues, voice tender, fond, and soft as a lullaby. "You just... need to let me in, and let me show you you're just as worthy of love as anyone else is."

You could only sit merely frozen at this point, throat tightened and jaw dropped in shock among many other weird, fuzzy feelings happening throughout your body. Something between relief and disbelief. Hope and hesitancy. Comfort and uncertainty. You have the capacity to run yet you choose not to𑁋you're letting him in, letting the warmth of his words seep into the cracks of your doubt.

Your mind reels dizzily, almost like the world has been tilting away off-balance.

"You... You're in love with me?" You repeat, almost dumbly, because you cannot seem to fathom anything that's been said in the past few moments. "All that talk about earlier... about who you..."

Wonwoo hangs his head down low, rubbing at his neck in a bashful manner. "It was about you."

"And you never... you never told me?"

"Honestly, I'd like to think a part of it was you being a tad bit oblivious." And then he just simply grins, his nose crinkling along with it. "But that's okay. Watching you slowly figure yourself out made me realise that maybe I needed to find myself a little more too."

You open your mouth to say something, but nothing comes out, and you could feel the heat of embarrassment spreading painfully throughout your face. At first, you have the urge to brush it all away as a silly misunderstanding. Maybe laugh it off, retreat back inside, and go to sleep pretending all of this didn't happen. But the sincerity in his eyes stops you.

You lick your dry lips, the cool night air beginning to feel a lot less suffocating.

"Did you?" You ask vaguely, before shaking your head repeating, "Did you... find yourself?"

Wonwoo lets his eyes roam over you, taking you in, before leaning back on the wall and bringing his gaze back up toward the night sky. Your eyes refuse to leave him, and perhaps this is what it's like to admire someone from afar and close up all at once.

The two of you take a deep, deliberate exhale together.

"Yeah," he answers, smiling softly. "I think I found myself right where I want to be."

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violently sobbing- this is adorbs

☆ WONWOO BOYFRIEND HABITS

pairing: wonwoo x reader

genre: headcannons, fluff, established relationship

a/n: 6th part of the seventeen boyfriend habits series (requested) !! sent an ask to suggest the next member! ask to be on the taglist or fill out the form!

back to seventeen boyfriend habits masterlist!

☆ always offers you his shoulder to lean on whenever you yawn

you first met wonwoo in one of your classes, he was seated in the row just behind you. when one day, you were begging one of your friends to send you the notes because you had fallen asleep during your two hour long lecture, wonwoo slowly came forward and lent you his perfect notes, pushing his glasses up his note cutely. you thanked him and bowed so much it almost embarrassed him. after that day, wonwoo realized that you often fell asleep in class and his friend, your seatmate, told him that you normally didn’t get much sleep because of homework and your part-time job. he also realized you both took the same bus so after a lot of hyping up from his friends, he asked if you wanted to sit next to him. whenever you took the bus (with wonwoo by your side), your eyes would close minutes after being seated and your head would fall on his shoulder, leaving the poor boy frozen in place so as to not wake you up. you falling asleep on his shoulder soon became a habit and even years later, wonwoo would always offer you his shoulder whenever he saw you yawn.

☆ softly bites you when he gets the urge

all the people close close to wonwoo have been at least one time the victim of his biting habit. of course, it’s not that bad of a habit but it sure is unexpected. wonwoo, the guy who’s too shy to speak to people and who prefers staying home reading and playing video games over going out, biting people?! where did that nonsense even come from, that’s what you thought to yourself when one of your mutual friends warned you. the latter had noticed the two of you getting closer and thought he should tell you before it was too late (read: before you were going to get bitten). you just brushed it off and decided it was only a joke until you witnessed it yourself. and when a few days after that, you were laughing along with wonwoo and he leaned forward, teeth inches away from your arm, you could only nod confusedly as he seemed to ask for consent by making eye contact. it was a small bite and it didn’t hurt so when he retreated and blushed with an embarrassed smile, you just patted his head, confirming you weren’t mad.

☆ plays absentmindedly with your jewelry

wonwoo has always liked jewelry, he thinks it completes an outfit and he often finds himself stopping in front of jewelry stores. so when you two started dating, it was a given wonwoo would be obsessed with the way the jewelry would look on your skin, the pretty piece of accessory making you shine even more. his first gift to you was a piece of jewelry too and he sighed in relief when you jumped to give him a hug. it was with a big smile that wonwoo helped you put the accessory on. for wonwoo, you wearing the jewelry he’s gifted you is one of the greatest things in the world and he often stares at where the jewelry is, sometimes adjusting it when it’s not in place and sometimes just holding the little piece in his hand, always giving you a kiss close to where it is. and sometimes when he’s been staring at the accessory too long, his hand absentmindedly slips between the jewelry and your skin, playing with it between his fingers, a lovesick grin on his face at the feeling of your skin.

☆ warms up the towels before you shower after a long day

you and wonwoo started talking in the middle of the summer and officially started dating when winter was at its peak. wonwoo would often joke about how the winter helped you two get together and you laughed along every time, but sometimes you do in fact thank the coldest season for having played a big part in your relationship. it all started when the two of you got snowed in at his apartment after having been soaked by the snow a few hours prior. so when you finally arrived at his home, legs jelly from having sprinted, taking a shower was the first thing on your mind. and wonwoo let you go first, picking out some clothes of his you could wear, preparing some hot beverage for you and heating up your towel so that when you’re done, you wouldn’t have to worry about anything at all. it’s something that made you fall even more in love with wonwoo and you thanked him with a kiss, officializing the relationship. From that moment on, whenever you came back to your shared apartment after a long day, wonwoo would prepare everything after you slipped in the shower or bath, throwing your towel in the damper for a few minutes before helping you dry off when you were done.

perm. taglist: @0x1lovebot @fairybinie @blaqpinksthetic @odetoyeonjun @pockyandme @soobin-chois @soobisms @junityy @kaimal @laylasbunbunny @jaeyunverse

svt bf habits taglist: @baldi-2 @soov @ggyulicious @enhacolor @shuabby1994 @mariecoura @rosellerinfrost @jaemicr @just-here-to-read-01 @inmynewwrld @bigbossbennett @pearlygraysky

please do not copy, repost or steal any of my work. all content belongs to @odxrilove

OMG I LOVE THIS SO MUCH FINNALLLLYYYY I am a firm believer that has would be so soft towards his s\o just like this fic istg im bouta sob

minghao smiles at you the moment he sees you're awake. "morning, sunshine."

"what did you put in that tea yesterday?", you frown, even though you're still a bit asleep and your whole body feels as relaxed as it possibly could.

"just some herbs my mom taught me", he holds your shoulder, massaging your flesh and smiling when he sees that you weren't as tense as the night before. "feeling better?"

"the world could end right now and i wouldn't even flinch. i'm so relaxed~"

hao chuckles, pinching your arm.

"great. there's some left, it's in your favorite bottle. take to the office with you."

minghao has to convince you to go to work; he has to kiss you a few times to wake you up properly, so you won't be late - but, damn, he's also so glad that you're feeling okay.

inspired on the tea i drank last night bc wtf, i'm feeling like i could levitate with how relaxed i am (thank god).

AWHHHHHH T-T

[ 💿 ] . . .TAPE 7

함께라서 웃을 수 있고 / 너라서 울 수도 있어 / 그렇게라도 못할 게 어딨어 / 언제 어디에 있어도 / 함께하지 못해도 우린 늘 그렇듯 / 웃음꽃 피워요 / 그대 미소에 봄이 돼줄게요

☁️ "smile flower" by seventeen

being loved by lee jihoon means being safe. he may not be a person who speaks loudly about his love or shows it through physical affection, but despite the lack of these things, you know that you will always be safe with him. he always covers the corners of sharp places so you don't bump into them and get hurt, he always walks on the outside of the sidewalk, he always has a change of shoes with him when you're wearing high heels, he carries your bag when it's heavy so you don't strain your shoulder. it doesn't even need to be mentioned that when you're at a party where there are a lot of people, jihoon always has his arm around your waist, and if he sees someone bothering you, he quickly shoos the uninvited stranger away with a not-so-nice expression on his face. the best part of it all? doing all of those things are so natural for him that most of the time he doesn't even realise he's doing them.

being loved by lee jihoon means you will always have someone to hug. jihoon has his limits when it comes to physical touch and he's not afraid to talk about them and openly admit when he feels uncomfortable with it. while as for you - there are no limits for you (you can say that this is one of your partner privileges). of course, he sometimes needs space from you when he's overwhelmed, but that's completely normal. however, you know that you can always, always hold his hand, hug him, wrap your hand around his bicep, or lean your head against his shoulder. in that aspect, he's like your anchor - when you feel overwhelmed, sad, or when your anxiety is bothering you, you know that you can always turn to jihoon. it's kind of a mystery to him how just his touch can calm you down, but if that's the way it is, he's more than willing to be there to hold you when you need it.

being loved by lee jihoon means being his muse. yes, this might be cheesy but it's true - you inspire him like no one else. there is something about you that no one else in the world has, and jihoon will be forever grateful that you are with him despite his demanding job, when sometimes you don't see each other for months and you only see each other through facetime. the way you support him, through thick and thin, the fact that your dates most often involve you sitting in his studio, the fact that sometimes you have to put up with his moods due to work - he will never be able to repay you for it. that's why you inspire him to create new music and lyrics, because in his mind this is the only way he could be able to express at least a hint of how grateful he is for having you in his life.

being loved by lee jihoon feels like a quiet night when everyone is fast asleep, like a goodnight kiss, like two hands holding each other with no intentions of letting go, like the waves hitting the shore, like the gentle voice of your lover singing you to sleep.

“i like myself better when i'm with you.”  - mitch albom, tuesdays with morrie

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