SAS Rogue Heroes X Blackadder - Life

SAS Rogue Heroes x Blackadder - Life

Paddy Mayne (Jack O'Connell) & Eoin McGonigal (Dónal Finn) in SAS: Rogue Heroes Season 1 Episode 2

[ want ] for a kiss to lead to something more for Paddy/Eoin?

Uh, so I went somewhere slightly different with this than perhaps was intended, but sometimes boys need to be soft and learn things about each other. Hope you enjoy anyway!

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“Read me something, Paddy.” 

Paddy’s lips twitch at the command, eyes narrowed like he is on the verge of saying something, until his eyes skate over the edges of Eoin’s face. Whatever he finds there, and Eoin can’t imagine it is anything pleasant, not this evening after the day that has been, makes his expression soften to the kind of faint concern that on anyone else would set his teeth on edge. His knuckles drum on the edge of the bed he is lying on, fabric shifting beneath the movement and Eoin knows he can take the invitation to sit, to lean himself back against the metal frame and rest his forearms on his knees, head buried in crossed arms. His best friend, as sharp-eyed as a kite, has surely not missed the shiver in his shoulders, but he does not say anything else and Eoin thinks, as he finds himself often thinking, that there is nobody in this world or any other that he might love more.

“‘I wish I could remember that first day, first hour, first moment of your meeting me.’”

He sighs, breathing frustration out to the air, as Paddy begins to speak. Rossetti, Eoin knows. He sniffs, nose pressed against his wrists. His watch strap digs into the side of his cheek as he turns, observing Paddy as he reads aloud. It’s an odd choice; Paddy has never been fond of her, though Eoin likes her well enough. It should be no surprise they like their romance painted in different colours. Paddy’s blood stirs for the horizon. These days, Eoin reckons, his blood might only stir for Paddy.

When the poem is finished, Paddy turns the page and does not look at Eoin. He begins another, then stops.

“I can continue,” he says, “if you’d like.”

“Yeah,” Eoin replies. 

“It’s been a long day,” Paddy says. Despite himself, Eoin’s mouth quirks up at the edge. 

“Go on, Paddy,” he says again. “Would you?”

He feels the edge of Paddy’s thumb stroke against the back of his neck, a soothing, friendly gesture that nonetheless sparks heat down his spine. He lets himself press back into it, stretching, baring his throat to the caress. Above him, Paddy swallows, and keeps reading. 

They stay like that for some time more; with each line, Eoin feels his black mood melting away, powerless against the cadence of Paddy’s recitation. His heart beats heavy in his chest, but the sharp pangs of anger, the piercing irritations of the day’s failures, these have all quite dissipated somewhere beyond this space, where there is room for nothing but the two of them and the small book in Paddy’s rough fingers. When he moves his hand away to turn the page again, Eoin could almost whimper, bereft of the touch until it returns, feather-soft and warm comfort once more.

Paddy, he doesn’t quite say, though his lips move with the word like he’s in church again. He closes his eyes, feeling the weight of the hand against his jaw. He could nuzzle into it, he thinks, he wants to, wants nothing more than to rest his face in the curve of Paddy’s palm, to let himself be held like some precious thing, and so he does. What Paddy might think, what Paddy might do, these are thoughts for the next moment. What he does know as sure as his own name, is that Paddy will never turn on him. 

“What are you doing, Eoin?” Paddy asks, after a pause. His voice is low, thick with questions that Eoin doesn't feel like answering.

“Keep reading,” he replies instead, lips brushing against Paddy’s skin. He kisses it for good measure. Something golden and giddy is beginning to bleed through his veins. “Do that for me.”

There is silence for a moment more, before he hears Paddy laugh softly, incredulously. 

“All right,” he says. 

Eoin kisses his palm again and then lays his cheek against the same place. “Thank you,” he says.

“Hush lad,” Paddy replies. His voice is wavering, though Eoin isn’t quite sure why. There has never been a moment that has made more sense. 

“‘Love me,’” he begins again. There is a long breath. “‘Love me, for I love you’.”

Love me, Eoin echoes silently, though he wonders if Paddy can hear it anyway, for I love you.

i’m kind of obsessed with how paddy looks at eoin here. he truly wants that cookie sooo effing bad.

Eoin McGonigal (Dónal Finn) in SAS: Rogue Heroes Season 1 Episode 1

excerpts from when i heard at the close of day, walt whitman