Pillow Talk

Pillow Talk

Astarion x F! Tav

18+ complicated/developing feelings, intimacy, heavy petting, urgent sex, dry humping, public sex (kinda), dirty talk, coming in pants (m!), implied trauma, miscommunication, tenderness, porn w/o plot

Tav innocently offered to help Astarion with his morning routine. But things get very close, and Astarion is shocked how her sweet face belies the sinful mouth she has...

-

"So you fill in your eyeline, right?"

He looked up from his book.

"Pardon?"

She was wiping the stray blood off of her neck with her fingers. Startling him when they slid into her mouth.

They had struck up a routine, he drank and she stayed to chat or just lay in quiet in his tent for a while.

This platonic exchange was new to him, but he found it surprisingly comfortable. Even looking forward to seeing her. Big doe eyes peeking under the flap of his tent, asking for entry.

She pointed good naturedly at him, licking her fingers clean. His eyes locked on her mouth.

"Your eyes. Your lashes are naturally white, yeah?"

They were, but he was a mite distracted.

Tav was... deceptive in nature. All eyes and lips. Her voice a bright chirp. Freckles and dimples. A beauty that was fit to the innocence of summer.

But as he got to know her found that she was more debauched. Always willing to cause chaos, down for anything.

Even shocking him sometimes with the things that would come out of her pouty flushed lips.

The contrast was... interesting.

"Why do you ask?" He intoned, looking back to his book in feigned disinterest.

"Well, I could help. It must be hard without a mirror."

"Interesting. And what would you gain from this exchange?"

She rolled her eyes. "I'm not trying to fuck you Astarion."

He blinked.

She had brushed off his advances by turning the tables before. He came at her with honeyed words and she called his bluff, upping the ante with crude huffed words in his ear until he walked away flustered.

It vexed him to no end. To not only be bested but also how her words shot straight to his groin.

"You sure about that?" He smirked, unable to help himself.

She smiled Cheshire at him. Started pulling her shirt open. "You want me to make you scream, Astarion?" The last of her words coming out a loud moan. A dare.

"Would you pipe down?" He admonished, voice coming out a harsh whisper.

She giggled, closing her shirt again. The sliver of the curve of her breast hidden again.

His ears were flushed, closing his book.

She sat back, legs tucked under her. All innocent again.

"So...?" She sing-songed.

"Okay, fine." He huffed, acting terribly put upon.

"Yay!" She chirped.

He bit back the smile forming on his lips.

"If you so insist, you can assist me in the morning. Now begone from me, demon."

She giggled again, high rising bells. Waving her fingers at him as she retreated from his tent.

Gods, what a nuisance.

Completely ignoring the tightness in his leathers he blew out the candle.

The sounds of morning accosted him, groaning in his tent.

He lifted the flap to get some air but laid back down with a dramatic flop.

From the window of his tent, he watched his campmates mill around.

Only Karlach excitedly preparing for her day, greeting with big smiles and hands clasped on shoulders. Everyone else a smeared facsimile of alertness.

Tav was still in her long sleep shirt, but mostly put together. Hair in a long plait down her back, face washed. Talking to Halsin, though he couldn't hear their conversation. Halsin's eyes gazing down at her in clear desire.

She had to crane her neck to look up at him, basically standing on tiptoes.

At one point, she lifted her arms to stretch above her head.

He saw the druids eyes dip to her arched chest hungrily then back up to her eyes, carrying on the conversation.

Astarion felt a heat in his chest. Then shook his head.

This was none of his concern. She was beautiful, of course their campmates wanted her.

She looked over, seeing his tent open. Her eyes brightening. Opening her mouth to say something to Halsin then bouncing away towards him.

He saw how the druids face slightly fell and felt a petty thrill in his chest.

"Good morning~" She sung. "May I come in?"

It felt good, if not foreign, to be asked permission.

"Of course, darling."

She climbed inside with a little wiggle.

He turned to his chest, pulling the small washbasin out.

As he began his morning routine, she laid on the floor of his tent, snuggling down into his newly freed blankets with a happy sigh.

She had to know how adorable she was.

He reveled these moments, where it was just them in a comfortable silence. It was intimate, but in a way that didn't make him feel like he was drowning.

He rubbed his face clear, his unmade hair falling down into his forehead. Sighing.

"What I wouldn't give for a working mirror." He grumbled.

"Well, let me see. I'll paint you a picture." She smiled, looking up at him from his bedroll.

Though he couldn't see himself, he suddenly felt exposed. Knowing his face was bare, his curly hair free of pomade and unruly from sleep.

He turned and looked down at her with a slight frown.

She sat up and took him in.

Of course she looked radiant. Her bare face giving her an even more entrancing layer of beauty.

He tried to not squirm under her gaze.

"Well, your eyes are very beautiful like this, the contrast of red and white suits you. Your lips are full and arched. Jaw sharp."

Her eyes drifting up to his hair. Tilting her head and smiling wide, her dimples on display.

"And your hair is so cute like this. Like a big sheep." She giggled.

"I am not a big sheep." He huffed. "How dare you."

She bit her lip, still smiling at him. "Altogether very handsome. It's a good look on you."

He suddenly wanted to kiss her and blinked away the thought in shock.

"So are you going to let me do your eyeliner now?" She asked, clearly excited.

"You know what you're doing?" He asked, handing her the smudging pencil.

"Just because I don't usually wear makeup while trudging through the woods doesn't mean I don't know how to use it." She teased.

"Well some of us can afford to take less effort it seems."

"Careful, that was dangerously close to a compliment." She laughed. "Here, lay back."

He laid against some propped pillows and she straddled over him.

Her face coming over his, gently holding his head still.

He knew she meant nothing by the position or the closeness. But his heart still phantom pounded.

"Look up." She hushed, lining the bottom of his eye with sure hands.

"You know, I get why you feel strange about your appearance." She spoke softly, face stern in concentration.

"People are weird about me too. Most people only give me the time of the day if they want to fuck me."

His eyes had drifted up to the roof of his tent but came back to hers at that.

"Fuck me then forget me. Thought that was how things were going to be for me for a long time."

She sighed. "Maybe it still is. If we didn't have tadpoles to keep us together I think half the camp would be culpable."

She had taken the air out of his lungs. Unknowingly mirroring his own thoughts to him.

"Sorry, that's not your problem." She murmured, switching to his other eye. Her tongue sticking slighty out of her mouth in concentration.

It wasn't, and yet he felt guilty. After all, he still was planning to seduce her. It hadn't been working, but still.

"And what if someone wanted to be with you and stick around?" He hushed.

She looked at him, pausing. Then smiling sadly.

"I don't know. I've never gotten that far." She shrugged. "Could be nice. Or a nuisance, depending on the person."

He laughed low in his throat.

"Okay, done." She leaned back, admiring her work.

"Oh, wait." She hushed, leaning forward again, lips so close to his he could feel their heat. Fingers smudging gently along the outer corner of his eye.

He leaned up thoughtlessly and slid his lips against hers.

She froze in shock, then slowly leaned into him. Moaning softly.

He cupped the nape of her neck, pulling her into him. Suddenly hungry and needful.

Aware of the tent flap still open, he turned his body over hers, shielding her from view.

Didn't need all of their companions spying on them, did they?

They pulsed into each other, all heat and slick. Tongues twisting, desperate pulls of hands. Panting.

His mind was full of nothing but spinning desire. A heady miasma of need.

He couldn't maintain decorum anymore.

With an impatient huff he kicked the tent wall, the flap falling closed.

Pulling his shirt off of his head he dove back into her. Lost in her velvet mouth, the lamb's ear skin of her thighs. All the soft little sounds she was making, sweet bird cries.

His hands pushed under her sleep shirt, gripping onto her plush hips. Pulling her into him with a low moan. Grinding his hard length into her soaked underclothes.

Her head fell back, gasping out choppy breaths.

He could tell she was trying to be quiet and it ignited more flames in his pelvis.

"Do keep your voice down, darling." He teased in her ear. Pushing her sleep shirt up more, cupping her breast.

She leaned forward and ran her tongue up the point of his ear, panting hot.

His eyes hitched back, groaning.

"I thought we were being quiet." She teased.

Evil. Evil woman.

"Oh, you're being nasty again?" He chided, hips rolling of their own accord now.

He was trying to maintain the upper hand here but he was flushed and panting. His purpose narrowed down to getting more, more, more.

"Oh you want nasty?" She purred.

She pulled on the waistband of his leathers, pulling him into her harder. Hips meeting his in time.

"How would you want me if we fucked? Hmm maybe you would bury your cock in my throat and let my sweet tongue lap at your underside till I was gasping."

Oh Gods.

His eyes squeezed shut, hips pistoning into her.

"Mmm, or maybe you'd want me on all fours, my slick greedy cunt taking your cock. Slamming your hips into my ass, seeing it jiggle with your thrusts."

She pulled his hand to her ass to make her point, suckling down on his ear.

He bit back a moan, hand gripping into the round plush flesh of her ass. Panting into her neck, bending her leg out with his. Pulling her open for him.

"Hmm, maybe not those." She hushed into the shell of his ear. "Maybe you want me to lick your nipple, suckling it in my hot tongue. Lave my tongue over your chest until your arching your back so pretty for me."

His breath caught in his throat, cock unbearably hard. Hips stuttering into her.

"Ohh," She smiled, looping a leg around his hip. "That's it."

She pulled down with her leg, his hips melded with hers now.

Grabbing a fistful of his hair she pulled taut, bending his neck open.

He was dangerously close, the hair pull nearly sending him over. Stifling the moan caught in the back of his throat.

"How hard would you shake for me when I fucked my fingers into you? Milking the agonizing pleasure from you. Spilling your spend in gushes on my bouncing tits."

He whimpered, gripping down into her hips and began spilling in thick ropes. Biting down into her shoulder to not cry out. Hard pulsing strikes of near tortuous pleasure. Ripping up through his body with merciless talons.

She held him steady as he shattered over her. Hushing encouragement into his ear.

His eyes had started to water, a lump suddenly in his throat. Startling himself.

He allowed himself one more moment of her warmth before pulling away. Sitting up and facing away from her. Forcing his breath slow and even.

"Hey," Her voice soft, pulling close to him but not touching. "Was that too much? I'm sorry."

"No, you were devine darling. Just needed to catch my breath. You wore me out, you wicked thing."

He held his hand hard to his chest, steadying himself. You're safe. You're here. You're safe.

She was quiet behind him, then planted a soft kiss on the curve of his shoulder, rising up.

"I've overstayed my welcome." She said knowingly. "Sorry. I'll be out of your hair in a second."

He wanted to tell her that wasn't it. That wasn't it at all. He actually wanted her to stay, lay in that quiet again. But his body was all sharp edges, bristling.

She slid his shirt back to him and left his tent. "I'll keep my distance from now on, don't worry."

The way she said it, with a certainty of wrongdoing, like accepting a punishment. His heart ached for a moment.

Like she had wronged him.

The sweet thing.

No. No, he would find a way to fix this.

~

First Zev of 2024 :> I will always come back to drawing him~

Kinktober Update!

Just a few things 🥰

I've updated my fic's work title on AO3!

When I first posted, I hadn't fully committed yet to doing all of the one shots with Vistri and Astarion. But now I am!

It went from

"EverythingIsAlreadyKinky - Kinktober 2023 with FicBrish"

to

"EverythingIsAlreadyKinky - Kinktober 2023: Oops! All Vistarion"

(very small, self-satisfying change there lol)

Also! Two new one shots have been added!

Both featuring Tav, or non-Dark Urge/Nurge, Vistri.

"Stay A While" [AO3] [Tumblr]

"The Truth of It" [AO3] [Tumblr]

Snippets below! (18+ only; Explicit)

"Stay A While"

(Act I - Forest - early into first sleeping together)

“Will you watch?” “As I hold you tight,” he offered. It was overwhelming. Astarion didn’t want a performance, not the kind she was used to, but something candid, completely her. He wasn’t asking her to curate his pleasure, he demanded she create her own. She never showed anything like it to anyone before. Accustomed to one type of role, she stepped into something unfamiliar. And not even a role, but the actor in their bed alone at night. Vistri’s hand travelled between her legs. She felt Astarion spread them further apart, holding her steady with a grip on each thigh. She was close to him again, held and admired; the only thing he wanted in the moment. Her fingers traced his lustful expression onto her soul, encircling herself in his web with every stroke. Determined to trade her life for a little death, she exposed her aching need to be coated in his poisons. She closed her eyes. “Open them, darling. I want you to watch me, as I watch you.” Her breath skipped with her choking heart as she met his gaze. Astarion looked as raw and exposed as she felt. His eager fangs rested on pouting lips. She leaned forward to lick them. “No, no, dear. You’ve got to earn that,” he cooed, “With your ecstasy.” She moaned stupidly, “Okay.” Vistri was everything his hand had been slapped away from these past 200 years. She ran through his thoughts entirely on her own. His body forced him to comply instead of the other way around. Sure, he was using her at the end of everything. She was by no means the first to surrender, but there was something sweeter about hers, and not just because she was his to savor. This time he was actually having fun. “Does it feel good, dear?” he grinned. She tossed her neck and sighed. Her eyes closed for just a moment before snapping open again to obey him, “Yes.” Astarion kissed her neck, and she moaned, leaning into it. He whispered into her ear, “You think you’re in control, but I’ve got you tangled up.” “You do,” she panted, “You do. All yours.” “My, but you put on a show,” his warm tongue wrapped around her lobe. His breath gently broke over her skin. It was like watching her layers peel back in a way he hadn’t seen before. Reading her eyes, Astarion watched them become saturated with the whole of her. The void in them brightened from her dim presence, and the light grew with her gratification. Shy at first, she stepped and then stomped into herself. Until there it was in those violet depths, the core of her on a silver platter, ready for him to devour.  Vistri let his name slip lazily from her lips.

"The Truth of It"

(Act I - Mountains camp - Vistri's first time being vulnerable and opening up about herself to Astarion)

The way she shivered was her answer. Astarion grinned and stroked her throat with the tip of his nose. From the base of it to her chin, and sealed his gesture with another longing kiss. She was his. Even if it meant degrading herself. Being his little slut, bent over and drooling. He moaned on the next stroke of her tongue, overcome by the whim to fuck her senseless. His mind reeled with possibility. Just how far would she go for him, out in the open air, with the others just off into the distance? How could he give her a taste of a life that was worth living? “Get yourself off for me, dear.” “Here?” Vistri asked, grinning. Her heart pounded faster than it already was. They weren’t exactly discreet, but only ever touched each other tucked away in the woods or his tent. Here, out on the cliff where anyone might see… It was like he was claiming her. Like maybe some small part of his mind, or some feeling deep down, knew how important she was going to be to him once he realized his truth. That if he asked her to cum in the open air under the evening glow, she was worth something. “The sun is disappearing, and I’ll cover you.” Her grin grew wider, even reaching her eyes. She tried to tug one of her arms free from his grip. “Ah, ah! No hands." She looked at him curiously. Maybe he’d changed his mind about her. Maybe he had a delightfully naughty idea. Maybe this was the start of his attempt to toss her off the cliff. He unwrapped one of her legs from around his, and slid his thigh between hers, “Use me.” “Okay.” Showing her how to proceed, Astarion rubbed himself against her middle. She bit her lip and began to roll her hips. Her obedience was like a drug, and they passed it with their tongues where it melted into them and infected their minds worse than those tadpoles ever could. “Good,” he praised, just above a whisper. He fondled her neck, and the hand he let go of shot to his curls. His fangs throbbed, so ready to take her that he gasped as if biting into something hot whenever they touched her skin. She made a sound he had to shush, it was too personal and way too explicit. “I can block you from view, but I cannot stop your sound.” She nodded, sighing and rocking against his thigh. “All the pieces come together,” he said as she pleasured herself on him, “You’ve always given yourself to me so willingly. Let me bite you. Now I know why.” Vistri tossed her head back, craning her neck, and sighed, “There are worse things than dying in the arms of someone pretty.” “And if I had killed you that night?” “I hope you would have drunk me up.” A full, wanting, warm acceptance of himself—Not just his charm, but the monster, the ugliness in him. She wanted all of it, treasured all of him. He’d never been good enough for anyone before, just a disappointment under an illusion. But she made him feel like a god. He groaned, composure slipping, “Ohfuckme…” “Okay.”

Bad Dream part 2 (final)

part 1

Masterlist

Honestly in terms of good childhoods it's a small gang. But there's a lot with mid childhoods.

- leliana is a mid. A kind family to care for her but still an orphan.

- varric maybe? His family was at least middle class and his brother was a dick but it seems okay?

- for the environment they grew up in iron bull and Sten had relatively good childhoods. The Qun has tons of issues but the fact that they have no bad memories to speak of makes me say mid.

- Josephine's family is outwardly well off but we know it's an illusion and the amount of parentification she is under would give me an ulcer. Still mid.

- Wynne might also be mid? The circle is oppressive but she seemed to do well within the system. For similar reasons Vivienne might be mid. The environment isn't good but nothing specific to them as people made it bad. Whereas for comparison we know anders suffered in the system and therefore had a bad childhood.

- Cassandra was orphaned young but did live with family who cared for her. Mid.

I honestly can only think of one good childhood. And even then it might be mid.

Merrill. Merrill grew up in a small caring community where she had friends close in age (Mahariel, Tamlen) and she would have been a cherished member of the clan due to her magic. And her relationship with Marethari is very sincere in their love for each other. It's as an adult that it falls apart which is what makes her leaving more heart breaking.

a few people suggested leliana is the one who had a good childhood and i do have to respectfully disagree. like there are definitely worse ones for sure but i don’t think good is the word i would use

Seeing stars

Welp, I wrote more porn.

Astarion x F!Tav/F!Reader

18+, smut, porn with plot, porn with feelings, jealous Astarion, soft dom Astarion, dirty talk, fingering, PIV, elf ears and more! Humour, banter and fluff mixed in per usual. Tav failing several insight checks in the process.

I also poke fun at the in-game romance mechanics, and Wyll's Act 2 scene in particular.

This is the last time they have sex before the "I want us to be something real" conversation.

Approx. 2,900 words

“You won’t believe the ludicrous encounter I just had with Wyll.” 

You burst into Astarion’s tent. Well, it was ‘Astarion’s’ tent only notionally at this point. Yours still stood, but it now served solely as storage space for your assorted junk. You had effectively moved in with Astarion, having first coerced him into replacing the wooden plank and bloodstained rags he slept on with some sensible rugs and blankets. 

Astarion lounged half-naked on one of the bedrolls, reading something by candlelight. 

“Oh?” he looked up at you. “Do tell.” 

“First the massage you promised earlier,” you said sinking down onto the floor of the tent and stripping off most of your clothes. “My back is killing me after carrying everyone all day.” 

“Oh please...” he rolled his eyes. “I recall you nearly walked into your own cloud of daggers, again, and would have if I hadn’t pulled you away in time. And then you blasted Lae’zel off a cliff. It’s a wonder we haven’t kicked you out yet.” He shook his head. “And if you’re carrying anyone, I’m the one carrying you.” 

Still, he sat up as you laid down on your stomach.  

“Who do you think you’re fooling with this modesty, darling?” he murmured, noticing that you’d kept your underwear on. “Just lose it now,” he added, as he slid it off, leaving you completely naked, before he settled over you, his fingers commencing work on your shoulders. “So what happened with Wyll?” 

“I was making my way back here, and found him... performing some kind of jig by the campfire, pretending like he didn’t know I was there.” 

“The ‘Blade of Frontiers’, dancing alone in the middle of camp?” Astarion snickered. “Did you mock him? Please tell me you mocked him.”  

“Well... I was going to, but then he asked me to dance with him, very earnestly.” 

“That scoundrel...” he mused. “And let me guess - you agreed, didn’t you?” 

“Oh trust me, at that point it would have been more awkward not to dance with him, I had to play along.” 

Astarion scoffed, with a chuckle. 

“Do you always go along with whatever people want from you just because it would be too awkward to say no?” 

"I try not to – last time I did, I ended up with a vampire who won’t stop sucking me dry,” you deflected. “I figured there was no harm in indulging him. Besides, I don’t see you dancing with me. It was kind of nice,” you teased. 

“I hate dancing,” he said. 

“Right,” you said. “I’m sure you hate dancing just as much as you hate poetry, flowers, art, cats... What else?” 

“Children,” he answered. “I also can’t stand children.” 

“No, that one I could see being true,” you grinned. 

“So anyway, you two dolts pranced around the fire to the sound of crickets, then what?” 

“And then he tried to kiss me,” you admitted, with a sigh. 

Astarion’s hands paused for a moment before resuming their work, slightly harder than before. 

“Well look at you, receiving the Duke Ravengard’s heir’s attention. Moving up in the world, hmm?” 

“I didn’t let him.” 

He laughed. 

“Is there even a single person left in camp that hasn’t tried to get into your pants, darling?” 

You had to think for a moment.  

“Are we counting Volo?” 

“Sure.” 

“Then just Karlach and Withers.” 

“Gods, I fucking love Karlach,” he murmured. “Don’t tell her I said that.” 

“Why? Getting jealous all of a sudden?” 

Astarion was silent for a few moments. 

“I just don’t understand it,” he said. “You’re with me every night. I’m at your side every day. They see us. They hear us. Still, they don’t take me – or you and me – seriously. Tell me, is there something about me that screams: ‘Please, go ahead and take my lover for yourself. Come on in and snatch her right out from under me, I don’t mind’?”  

Perhaps you’d made a bad judgment call when you thought Astarion would find the absurdity of the situation humorous rather than offensive. Still, you had to bite your cheek to keep from laughing at the dramatics he added to the delivery of the last few lines that left his mouth. 

“Stop laughing,” he said.  

“I’m not laughing,” you laughed.  

“I can feel your back muscles twitching in your efforts.” 

“Well, they’re aware this all started as a joke. Perhaps they never realised that it’s long stopped being one?” you offered. 

Astarion’s hands had been moving lower and lower along your back. They had now reached your ass and continued to rub, stroke and squeeze, as you let out a soft groan. 

“That’s not my back, Astarion.” 

One of his hands kept squeezing an ass cheek, while the other dipped to stroke you between your legs. He gave a satisfied hum when two of his fingers entered you effortlessly. 

“Maybe if they could see how wet I can make you just by rubbing your back they’d reconsider how much of a joke this is,” he said, his voice low. He continued to pump his fingers in and out – you were almost embarrassed by the loud squelching sounds that came out of you. You moaned and tried to lift your hips higher, but your legs were encased between his thighs, pinned down on the bedroll. “Do you think you’d be reacting this way to young Ravengard, darling?” 

“Stop it,” you hissed. “You know I don’t want anyone but you.” 

“Stop?” he pulled his fingers out, to your dissatisfied whine. You looked back to see him studying your slick on his fingers. “I should go smear this on his face right now... The audacity to try to get his hands on what is not his.” He licked his fingers clean instead. He turned his attention back to you.  

“Maybe if you were more vocal about your devotion to me the others wouldn’t make these mistakes.” 

His hand returned between your legs, spreading your wetness and slipping lower to tease your clit.  

“I could be... encouraged... to be more vocal about it,” you breathed, trying to grind against his hand.  

“Yes... I should make you scream my name, so they all know who you belong to.” 

His fingers returned inside you, teasing you with shallow strokes.  

“You can try,” you taunted him. 

Astarion let out an indignant huff and shifted to spread your legs open with his knees, simultaneously placing a hand on your back to firmly hold you down. You expect to feel his cock enter you, but he continued to stroke you with his fingers, turning his hand to curl them downwards.  

“Is that a challenge, darling?” he asked, his voice dangerously low. “You should know better by now than to bet against me,” he said, continuing to flex his fingers inside you. 

It started off pleasant enough, but rapidly grew into... more. And more. You weren’t sure what he was doing but whatever it was, it was just about making you see stars. 

You sputtered as the new sensation started to take hold of your whole being.  

“Ast… what..”  

You couldn't manage anything coherent, as his fingers continued to dig into you, gradually picking up speed and pressure. You started to squirm to try to get away despite yourself, but he simply put more weight against the hand on your back, securely pinning you to the bedroll. 

“Always getting yourself into situations you're not prepared for…" he murmured. "You're not talking your way out of this one.”

His fingers were relentless. You were worried you really would scream and wake everyone in camp. All you could do was bite down on the pillow, hoping that it would muffle your drawn-out moans. 

“Let go, darling... I know you want to.” 

It's not so much that you let go – rather, all your decorum was ripped from you, as your muscles convulsed, the orgasm rolling through your entire body. You panted and shuddered, trying to keep quiet, your hands clutching desperately at the covers beneath you, trying to hold on to anything like your life depended on it. 

Once the feeling subsided, you came back to your senses to find Astarion hovering over you, kissing the back of your neck and shoulders, grazing them with his fangs, almost but not quite hard enough to draw blood. You felt his erection rubbing against your hip. 

“Has anyone fucked you like this before?” he whispered hoarsely into your ear, his breath ragged from his own arousal. “Tell me.” 

“No,” you gasped, trying to catch your own breath.  

“I thought so,” he whispered with a smile, kissing your neck before he sat back up. 

You turned back to look at him over your shoulder. He watched you with a self-satisfied grin, his fingers returning to stroke you lightly between your legs once more. 

“Do you want me to do it again?” he purred. 

A part of you wanted to wipe that smug grin off his face after what he just put you through. Another, much larger part, wanted nothing more than to submit yourself to whatever he would do to you.  

“Yes,” you admitted sheepishly. 

“Turn around...” he narrowed his eyes mischievously. “I want to see your face this time.” 

You flipped around onto your back, under his watchful gaze. His eyes never left yours as he stroked your slit, teasing your engorged clit with his thumb, before his fingers slipped back inside you. 

You found yourself mewling in anticipation before he really even started doing anything.  

“So eager,” he smirked. “So wanton...” 

He curled his fingers again, moving his whole hand to mercilessly claw into a sweet spot you didn’t even know existed inside you.  

You tried to relax into and accept this sensation, now that you were familiar with it. A growing pressure kept building at the bottom of your stomach. It was too much. It was entirely too much. You couldn’t take more of it. You couldn’t- 

“Let go, I’ve got you...” His whisper sounded so tender in sharp contrast to the depraved way he was handling your body. 

You sobbed as what you hoped was cum gushed out of you, your legs quivering.  

“Good girl”, Astarion laughed with glee, bending down to place a kiss on your lips, continuing to stroke you lightly, “Your body reacts so perfectly to me... Do you want more?” 

“You... I want you...” you groaned, biting his lip. 

“If that’s what my good girl wants,” he purred, discarding what was left of his clothes.  

You groaned as his cock entered you, rocking your hips against his, trying to find that feeling again. 

“So wet and needy for me...” he goaded you. “I’ve completely ruined you for anyone else, haven’t I?” 

He held absolutely nothing back as he fucked you, lewd insistent sounds of skin slapping on skin combined with your shared grunts and moans disturbing what was likely otherwise a silent night. 

“Anyone awake knows exactly what I’m doing to you right now,” he rasped, voice thick.  

Your walls clenched at the thought, making him shudder and sigh as well. 

“You like that thought, don’t you..? I know you do,” he continued. “So shameless...” 

Despite yourself, you whimpered, clenching again as another orgasm started threatening to overtake you. 

“That’s it... Come for me again,” he groaned. “Come for me, my love.” 

‘My love’..? Just a figure of speech, you thought. You’d thrown that phrase around, jokingly, but it’s never sounded so... raw. You wanted to hear it again. You wanted to keep hearing it.  

“Your what?” you gasped.  

He didn’t answer. Instead he caught your lips in a deep, devouring kiss, pinning your arms over your head.  

Your body gave in and you trembled under him, caught up in waves of pleasure again.  

He released your arms and eased his movements once you rode out your high, but kept kissing you, hungrily, unwilling to release your lips from his.  

Clearly, no further words of love would follow, you thought to yourself with a tinge of both relief and disappointment, deciding to let it go. 

“You’re so good to me,” you managed, breaking your lips from his. 

“Aren’t I just?” he groaned, speeding up again to chase his own release.  

You kissed your way up his jaw to his ear, pausing to nibble on his earlobe.  

You couldn’t see it, but a ditsy, open-mouthed smile started to play on his face. 

Astarion gasped with a sharp intake of breath as you continued further, running your tongue over the inside of the shell of his ear. 

“Oh sweet hells,” he sighed with pleasure, immediately grinding into your harder. 

You smiled as he tilted his head, just about pressing his ear against your lips. 

“Do you like that?” you whispered in his ear, running your tongue over it again, lifting your hands to run your fingers through his hair. You knew he did. You just wanted to hear him say it.  

“Yes... Don’t stop...” His words sounded like a desperate plea. 

You continued to gently nibble on the edge of his ear, soft moans escaping you from his movements. 

“That’s it, take what’s yours” you groaned, as his hips crashed into yours harder. 

His breathing and movements were becoming more and more frantic.  

“Astarion...” you whispered, grazing the shell of his ear with your lips. 

He let out an uncharacteristic whimper, all his usual composure slipping from him, as he bucked his hips, fucking you with quick, shallow thrusts.  

“My sweet...” you breathed against his ear. 

He came completely undone, spilling into you with forceful, jagged thrusts, before finally stilling. His whole body seemed to melt into yours as he stayed on top of you, trying to regain his breath. 

You wrapped your legs around his hips, not wanting to let go of him yet, but he didn’t seem to be in a hurry to lift himself from you either. Instead he trailed light, tender kisses from your neck up to your lips.  

You delicately traced the contours of Astarion’s face with your fingertips, running them from his cheekbone down to his jaw, as he leaned into your caress, gazing into your eyes.  

Astarion parted his lips slightly, as though to say something, only to seal them again. He tilted his head to kiss your knuckles as your fingers gradually made their way back up, to run through his hair. Eventually he spoke. 

“You would really choose me over the more... blatantly obvious options you have at your disposal here?” he asked quietly.  

“Haven’t I made that abundantly clear already..?” 

“Well of course you have – no one else is this good,” he said with a tired smirk. 

“I’m not talking about the...” you blinked. “You know I’m not with you just for the sex, right..?” you frowned, looking into his eyes. 

He looked away, slipping out of you and moving to lie down next to you.  

“Is that so?” he said softly.  

You found yourself suddenly feeling rattled. Was he simply fishing for compliments again, or had you been utterly oblivious to just how deep his insecurities ran this whole time..? 

“You have a wealth of other qualities that I... enjoy and appreciate,” you said, somewhat lamely.  

Astarion propped his head up on his hand and raised an eyebrow at you quizzically. There was a hint of vulnerability in his eyes despite his outward nonchalance.  

Oh for fuck’s sake, you thought. I’m not ready for any serious conversations now, especially not with cum running down my thighs.  

You turned away to grab something to wipe yourself down with. 

“A gentleman would clean up his own mess, by the way. Not one of your strong points. But you do have some virtues that make up for it. For instance... I can leave cheese unattended around you, knowing you won’t eat it.” 

Astarion went to pinch the bridge of his nose, sighing.  

“You’re a treasure trove of useless information,” you continued. “But unlike some of our companions you usually keep it to yourself.” A hint of a smile played on his lips at that.  

“Your hand feels nice and cold on my forehead when I have a headache.” You laid back down next to him, mirroring the way he was lying. 

“You always smell nice, especially for a dead guy. You never hog the mirror.”   

“What about my hair, won’t you mention that?” he smiled. 

“No, fuck your hair, it makes mine look awful in comparison.”  

He chuckled at that. 

“I do rather adore the garnet puppy eyes though,” you murmured. “What else... You make me laugh, and, more importantly, I make you laugh – which is great for my ego,” you continued.  

“As long as you understand that I’m usually laughing at you,” he countered. 

“Prick... Then there’s the fact you’ve saved my life four times.”  

“Seven,” he said quietly, looking into your eyes.  

“Five.”  

“It’s seven, dear, I counted.” 

“Whatever. When it comes to battle, you’re silent but deadly,” you said. “Like a-” 

Astarion’s hand covered your mouth.  

“Do not finish that thought, darling.” 

You grinned from behind his palm.  

“I think we can be done with this conversation,” he said.  

“Wait, wait, one more...” you laughed. “You’re eccentric, unpredictable, often irrational. I never know what’s going to come out of your mouth.”  

You smiled as Astarion groaned dramatically, covering his face with one hand.  

“Knowing I’ll get to spend another day in your mad company gives me a reason to get up in the morning,” you added, softly. 

“Come here, you sweet fool,” he whispered, drawing you against him.  

You hugged him tightly. It took so long for him to start initiating these embraces that wouldn’t lead to sex... You relished each one.  

Tomorrow, Astarion thought to himself, unbeknown to you. I have to tell her tomorrow.  

~~~~~

Follow up bonus scene

This work is part of a series - here is the master list

Next in series - Confession

AO3

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