Answering 21 Questions And Tagging 21 People :))

answering 21 questions and tagging 21 people :))

,,,except I won’t be tagging 21 people,,, maybe just like four lol, just because I don’t know 21 people to tell this to but I was tagged by @onlyjunho. thanks for the tag, love <3

name: zai

nickname: zai is the nickname, lol, since I still feel kinda iffy about putting my actual name out on the internet... 

gender: female

star sign: I’m a sagittarius, but I don’t believe in horoscopes and astrology

current time: it is currently 9:49 p.m., and I have a few assignments to finish before knocking tf out haha

fave artist: ummm I don’t have a set one, because it keeps changing, lol but if I had to pick one, then definitely lolo zouai.

song stuck in my head: wave by ateez... I love it

last movie I saw: a bollywood movie called mardaani (meaning masculinity)

last thing I googled: just now, “mardaani definition” ahaha

other blogs: I don’t have any other blogs, this is the only one

do I get asks? I’d like to say I get them often but no, I don’t. my inbox is fairly empty for the most part.

reason for url: because I think xiao dejun’s absolutely and utterly sweet.

following: too many people to write out, lol but a lot of talented and creative individuals, definitely.

average sleep: ok so I’m kind of anal about it but I need to make sure I get at the very minimum 7 hours of sleep every night, at least on the days I have to wake up early the next morning for class. 

lucky number: I don’t think I have one, I’ve never really thought about it.

currently wearing: an atlanta hoodie because it’s freezing, then a t-shirt of my college and a pair of plaid pajama bottoms, and llama fuzzy socks :))

dream job: I would definitely love to work for a company as a businesswoman, and travel a lot, too. like international marketing or smth.

dream trip: I would really like to visit a country that’s rich in history, like turkey, or italy.

fave foods: so for people who know know me, they know how big of a foodie I am.. and I love a lot of different foods, but thai curry and rice... that’s the stuff that I LOVE.

instruments: I’ve never played an instrument before, but if I ever have the chance to, I’d love to learn how to play the piano. I think it’s a beautiful instrument, that creates beautiful music.

fave song right now: my current favorite song is HANDS DOWN black swan by bts OH MY GODD.

I tag @hwayoungscorpioshin, @chajvnhos, @arckook, @junholy and @lublycho (you guys aren’t obligated to do this, of course) and as always, to whoever would like to do this. 

coterie: the poker chip (1/2)

gang!x1 x fem!reader

pairing: cha junho and y/n

a/n: mentions of violence and cursing, so proceed with caution.

you held the poker chip out in front of everyone, making sure each of them could see it. before anyone says anything, you’re determined to figure out whose this is; there’s a guy who shows a defeated reaction, muttering something to the guy next to him. that guy’s face remains unchanged. you rule him out too, there’s no way this is his. there are a few of the guys who show relieved looks on their faces, and you rule them out too. who is it? seungwoo clears his throat, “it seems like you’ve picked junho, y/n. junho, go ahead and brief her. the rest of you, come with me, I’ve your assignments. junho, I’ll contact you later for yours.” and all but one of the boys follow seungwoo out of the room. the one you ruled out early on turned out to be the owner of the poker chip. he approached you, with the same blank look on his face and reached out his hand to introduce himself. you shook his hand with a confused look in your eyes. he seemed to notice, and he started, “you must be thinking why I didn’t react when you chose my object. come with me, I’ll explain it to you.” and he turned on his heel, before heading towards one of the many corners of the mansion. you followed him step after step, and he began to speak. his voice was low so in order to hear him clearer, you caught up to him, now walking side by side with junho. “first and foremost, I’m cha junho. I’m twenty years old, I have been a part of x1 for roughly three years now, but I’ve been in the business since I could walk.” you go down a hallway that gradually gets darker; are the lights dimming, or is there an overall absence of light from this area? it sure as shit can’t be that they can’t afford electricity. junho continues walking, and your pace starts to slow until finally, he comes to a stop. “what business, you’re probably thinking, right?” he says, and digs in his pocket, fishing out a key and sticks it in what you can assume is a keyhole (not that you could see much). “was it hand-reading, or were you a psychic?” you sarcastically answer him, and he stays silent before answering, “I’m not sure what you meant.” inhaling sharply, you tell him that it was a joke, and you explained that the joke was that he was saying all the things you were thinking aloud like he knew what was going on in your head. now that you had to explain yourself, the joke lost some of its humor which made you furrow your eyebrows. “ah, I understand now. please know that I don’t really get sarcasm, so if you use it with me, I’ll probably have no idea what you’re talking about. I’m very straightforward.” wow, this is the guy you were stuck with? a breathing machine? your luck is fantastic. “I should be a bit clear about what I do,” he started and opened a door, before getting to the side. “after you.” you step into the dark room before a light flicks on. this reveals a myriad of different weapons along a huge wall, and in front of it is a table that holds multiple weapons as well. “holy shit. what- what is all this?” you breathe out, your eyes wide with surprise. “this is the business.”

you turn back around, and leaning against the doorframe is junho, with a revolver spinning on his finger. once he notices your gaze, it comes to a halt perfectly, and he lifts the gun in front of his face, before finally flitting his gaze over to you. “I chose the poker chip because like the card game poker if you bluff enough, you can win. in other words, if you keep your face blank enough, you can win.” you carefully lean against the table, making sure none of the numbers of blades are near you before you shift your focus back on junho. “I don’t understand.” junho puts the revolver back on its place, then he starts, “my job in this team is to kill. I’ve killed many people, and almost every time, I’ve gone unnoticed. I’ll do the job and disappear. that’s how I’ll get away with it and the reason why I get away with it is because I keep a poker face. even if I miss one little thing, I’m off the hook because they say, ‘he doesn’t look like he did it.’” your gaze freezes in fear because you wouldn’t put two and two together; even if he didn’t tell you any of this, you would have never guessed he was a killer. “do you remember the death of that one big business guy a few months back? the one who owned that building in the city? well, he asked us to borrow some of our weapons, and he ended up trying to sell them to a third party who just so happened to contact us.” junho starts, and the image is blurry in your head but you remember it. it was huge and all over the news that they never found the killer, and then your eyebrows rise in realization. “was that you?” and he nods. you let out a noise of astonishment. that just means one thing: he is great at his job. so you tell him that. “wow, you’re really good at it, then. I wouldn’t have even dreamed that you, uh… do what you do, let alone being the face of the nation’s most memorable assassinations.” and you see the first instant of emotion on junho’s face when he gives you a weak smile at that. “thank you for the compliment. it seems very bad, but I promise, I only kill the bad guys. and that too, after I get the background check and face details from dongpyo and wooseok.” your attention goes to the weapons neatly lined up on the wall, and you’ve watched movies and tv, but you’ve never seen weapons like these before. retractable blades and god knows what, your eyes wandered in wonder and you breathed out, “wow, how do you get access to these weapons?” junho shrugged, moving to stand next to you and mumbles, “well, we have our…source, who’s in charge of making the weapons for us, and by ‘us’, I mean eunsang and me, since we deal more with the violent stuff. of course, you could easily read emotions across his face, which is why seungwoo hyung assigned this position to me.” and as your eyes scan the intricate details on said weapons, and the small x1 emblem twinkles under the lights on the ceiling.

“y/n, I have an important question for you,” and you turn towards junho and urge him to continue. “well, you’ve chosen me to work with. and now you’re also aware of what I do. what do you think you’ll be able to assist me with?” you completely forgot about it for a minute. you couldn’t possibly come up with what exactly you’d do if you worked for junho, besides… helping him with the killings. “I’m not entirely sure what there is for me to do, besides, uh, killing. but I don’t think I’m comfortable with that yet.” junho sighed understandingly, then started, “I won’t do that to you yet. hmm, let me think.” just then, junho received a notification from his phone, diverting his attention from you momentarily. “it’s from seungwoo hyung, he’s calling me to his office. you stay here, it shouldn’t take longer than ten minutes. feel free to look around, just don’t touch anything, as you may injure yourself. I will leave you to it, then.” and he stepped out, leaving you in this…chamber of weapons. what would you do, exactly? you’re sure there is more to this job than killing. the research, the disguise, but that stuff’s taken care of by wooseok and dongpyo, but maybe you could help them with that. or maybe you could be like a… secretary. no, that doesn’t fit with his job. “what the fuck am I gonna do here…” you mumble aloud, and you huff and sit on the ground, which seems to be the only safe space where you could trust yourself to sit. just then, junho opened the door and found you on the floor, your eyes focused on a corner, in thought. then it hits you; who is there to make sure things are going well, and junho goes unnoticed? junho makes sure of it to some extent, you’re sure, but what if you helped him out with that. “junho, I think I have an idea. what if I’m like your guide, or something? like I’ll tell you about your surroundings and I’ll help you run through things smoothly, overall. I don’t trust myself with a weapon yet, as you may have noticed.” and junho stands still, eyes blinking at a constant speed. the air in the room remains quiet and awkward, before he breaths out, “that sounds like a good idea. I guess it makes things a bit easier for me, too. I’ll be able to focus on the job at hand instead of having to worry about what’s going on around me.” you stand up, and your eyebrows go up and junho blinks back at you robotically. “so, does that sound good?” junho nods and says, “we start prepping for our next mission tomorrow, so please be awake by 7 in the morning. I will see you soon, y/n.” and you leave the weapon room and head to yours, excited for what awaits you the next morning.

a/n: ahhhhh there we have it! sorry it took so long, everyone! a LOT has happened over the past few weeks; I was out of town, then x1 disbanded, then I had some personal problems going on and then classes started back up so there was really no way for me to send this out sooner, so thanks for being patient with me! nevertheless, I hope everyone enjoys it, and it’s good to be back on the writing scene!

the aesthetic is unreal 😫🥺🤧❤

NCT 127 Gift Song {Dreams Come True}

this whole time since the disbandment news i hadnt cried yet… but knowing one of the boys called the ceo to ask for them to be a part of the 10 minute meeting that would decide whether they split or not… 

they fought so hard to stay as x1. they wanted to stay. and they were ignored, while the public called them beneficiaries of corruption

the agencies that did this to those kids are fucking heartless

I-

Jongdae had the AUDACITY to make an album about loneliness and heartbreak only to go home and enter the loving embrace of his soon to be wife’s arms. He said ‘Y’all lonely bitches need quality sad songs and I’ll provide that but that ain’t me lol’

:(((

hangyuls instagram vid…. guys im in tears