Haarlep Listening To The Muffled Sounds Of Raphael Doing His Lil Musical Number While Getting His Ass

Haarlep listening to the muffled sounds of Raphael doing his lil musical number while getting his ass beat by the adventurer they fucked earlier.

Bg3 as unhinged posts 24/?

Part 23

I saw some posts speculating why Raphael looks the way he does. Not only he does not look like Haarlep (don't tell him that), but also cambions are not supposed to age past their twenties according to DnD 4e lore. Not sure about 5e tho, but that' irrelevant.

Some people supposed that Raphael's look is an illusion he puts on to make himself seem more mature and imposing. While I like this theory, let's be real: Raphael is exactly that type of person who claim they look so unbelievably young they have to show their ID to buy alcohol.

Like this man will have a meltdown if you call him daddy.

And then the truth was revealed to me in a vision.

*girl who wakes up at noon voice* how is it this late already

Wyll is so fucking funny and no amount of acknowledgement about this could ever be enough. He's literally walking around being so casually hilarious completely under-the-radar. He calls Halsin a "thick hunk of an elf". He once accidently implied that he was fucking an ogre instead of killing it and then proceeded to absolutely stumble his way through explaining. He gets excited by Lae'zel talking about carnal pleasures. He canonically tells his pessimistic thoughts to shut the hell up. He volunteers to babysit Shadowheart's hypothetical werewolf babies as long as she gets him gloves. He tries to give Gale a hero moniker like his own. He jokes that his father, the Grand Duke of Baldur's Gate, can't spell. He calls Astarion "Mister Fangs". He makes up storybook chapter names for his own fucking adventures. As a child he got chased by the Flaming Fist for stealing fruit, nearly drowned trying to find mermaids in the harbor, and almost successfully broke into the Counting House. He reads monster erotica, and is not ashamed to tell you about it. He ranks eating pudding among life's greatest moments. He will, without shame and completely unprompted, meow at you. He is 24 years old.