The-bear-and-his-sunbird

Gale

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Headcanon that spawn Astarion eventually becomes a writer. I know this goes against his one "well I don't care much for literature" quip, but like, I can see why in the midst of those 200 years he wouldn't care for it. He's not someone who tries to escape his existence through fantasy. He's too pragmatic for that. So stories would seem trite to him.

I imagine it doesn't start with books-- it starts with a scathing letter to the editor of the Baldur's Mouth he writes on impulse when he happens to glance at some ridiculous article proposing, idk, a monument to Gortash or something else that catches his ire. Of course, it's a sensation at first because he's one of the great heroes of the Netherbrain battle, but also… he's hilarious. Elegantly savage. Astarion loves words, ok. Random poetical shit just comes out of his mouth. He loves to play with phrasing, double entendres, all that. And before he knows it, he's being offered a weekly column in the Mouth on whatever catches his fancy. Sometimes it's goings-on in the city. Sometimes it's a cheeky advice piece based on a letter sent to him by a reader. Everyone is begging for a tell-all of the heroes' adventures, of course, but he politely declines.

And then when he and Tav are traveling, looking for a way for him to walk in the sun, he starts, essentially, travel-writing. Starts to stretch his prose, his descriptions of the fantastical places they find. And the book that comes out of that is what establishes him as a capital-A Author. After 200 years of being told to shut up, of no one wanting to hear it, he is getting praised for his words, and JUST his words. It would be a revelation to him, being seen as worthy like that.

What kissin my bois in the middle of the city streets feels like

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