It Feels Like A World Gone Mad. Theres Nothing You Can Do About It. You Have Always Worn Your Flaws

❝ it feels like a world gone mad. ❞  ❝ there’s nothing you can do about it. ❞ ❝ you have always worn your flaws upon your sleeve. ❞ ❝ i was left to my own devices. ❞ ❝ these are the things we lost in the fire. ❞ ❝ i want you to be happier. ❞ ❝ this is how it feels to take a fall. ❞ ❝ now you’ll be missing from the photographs. ❞ ❝ i miss you more. ❞ ❝ i’ll be dancing at the funeral. ❞ ❝ i am the lesser of two evils. ❞ ❝ i will love you ‘til the end of time. ❞ ❝ words are all we have. ❞ ❝ i hear you calling in the dead of night. ❞ ❝ if you had your gun would you shoot it at the sky? ❞ ❝ will you come down at all? ❞ ❝ can you feel it? ❞ ❝ there’s an albatross around your neck. ❞ ❝ can you stand the person you’ve become? ❞ ❝ there’s a hole in my soul. ❞ ❝ i’ll see you in the future when we’re older. ❞ ❝ cross my heart and hope to die. ❞ ❝ we were lying in the middle of the road. ❞ ❝ well,  they always sounded empty. ❞ ❝ we made the best of what we had. ❞ ❝ now you carry it with you. ❞ ❝ so many people passed me by. ❞ ❝ you warmed me to my core and left me wanting more. ❞ ❝ now it follows me every day. ❞ ❝ i feel guilty. ❞ ❝ living without you is driving me insane. ❞

rainy spring days 🌦

Welcome! This is an independent roleplay (written & visual narration) blog of Tamlin, High Lord of the Spring Court, from the ACOTAR series. | This character was created and then slaughtered by Sarah J. Maas. The writing will be a mix of canon and non-canon compliant. All original writing here is penned by CeCe. My main blog is @positivelyruined and my original writing blog is @ruinedruminations.

I am a pro-Tamlin writer. I will not tolerate character bashing. As most pro-Tamlin fans are, I am anti-feysand.

My accepted ships include: Feylin, Tamcien, Brilin, Feytamcien, Tamgwyn, Tamlin x OC.

Pairing possibilities that I will be picky about: Tamsand. (I write Rhysand as a primary villain and his love for Tamlin as largely unrequited. Tamlin saw Rhysand as his first true friend. Keep that in mind when requesting.)

I am willing to work with any of these; however, please don’t force a ship or romance on me as a writer.

The Fae Code & Roleplay Guidelines | Please respect my boundaries

• Character abuse will lead to a swift block. As will anonymous threats, or bullying.

• I rarely write smut. I prefer not to. If I choose to, I will only write 18+ with someone who can prove they are 18+. This is a firm boundary for legal reasons.

• Please be patient. Being a good writer takes time.

• Please don’t repost my writing — it’s incredibly precious to me. Reblogs and likes are more than welcome!

• Be original in your own writing. Don’t plagiarize off myself or others.

• Don’t godmod. In roleplay, write only your chosen character’s perspective and dialogue. I will contribute all that Tamlin has to offer.

• Take your time.

• Ask questions if you need help.

• Send, but don’t spam.

If you have read and acknowledged this, please comment with a Spring Themed emoji below.

4, 15, 16 for the character ask

Ask the High Lord | Character Portrayal Questions ✨

4. Favorite line

“I love you,” He whispered, and kissed my brow. “Thorns and all.”

15. Worst thing they’ve ever done

During one of the most intense battles between the humans and the faeries, Tamlin found himself protecting a group of both human children from a terrible onslaught of beasts. He managed to winnow eleven of them to safety. By then, the conflict had been over twenty four hours. Even his great wells of strength were fading. The twelfth child waited for him in a nearby church, hiding between the benches. He arrived just in time to place his hand over the little boy’s mouth before he screamed in terror and alerted the nearby fae. Yet, they saw him anyway. Tamlin’s ability to fight was greatly barred by the child’s instinct to run away. As he struck the killing blow to one of his own, the little one ran in front of him and accidentally ended his own life on Tamlin’s blade.

He didn’t scream. He simply looked his guardian in the eye and thanked him for trying.

Tamlin screamed.

He screamed while holding the tiny, bloody body and watching life fade out of it.

He screamed in the night when the images forced their way back into his mind.

He still does — in his heart — every time he walks through his own village and sees a small fae playing in the sun.

The worst thing he’s ever done was not save the last one when even the last of them deserved to be saved.

16. Deepest darkest secret they won’t even admit to themselves

Tamlin blames himself for his mother’s death. His father was a senselessly violent man, who had two sons by the time that his mother conceived him. For nearly all his life, he listened to his father berate her over his existence. Often, his father claimed that she had cheated with another behind his back. These senseless allegations started before he was born. Six months into her pregnancy, his father attacked his own mate and she nearly lost her own life — not to mention her child. After that, she moved as far away from the manor as she could and into a cabin on the shores of Lake Naimore, which bordered the Winter Court.

This was where his mother birthed him and raised him for the first three years of his life. When he was five, the High Lord of Spring demanded a paternity potion — which quickly backfired in his face.

Tamlin was his son.

Faced with a son whom he’d never wanted and a mate whom he’d all but destroyed his connection to — Tamlin and his mother were reluctantly welcomed back to the Spring Court.

She was very protective over him. The abuse often continued.

Tamlin was often the one who bound up his mother’s wounds after she came back from a conversation with his father. Then, he transformed into a barrage of tiny animals to help her smile again.

The stress slowly took its toll on her. She retreated more often into her chambers as he grew up, but his loyalty never wavered.

His mother held one powerful card over his father — a secret, one that the High Lord never wanted discovered.

This kept Tamlin safe from his physical tirades except for once. The one time that he looked his father square in the eyes and said, “One day I will be big enough to hit you back.”

His mother died when he was eighteen. “It was her heart,” they said. “She’d gone through too much.”

No. Tamlin thought to himself. It was me. If I had never been born, she would still be dancing with the roses.

i'd rather die on my feet ,

then live on my knees .