I Forgot How Excited Little Kids Get For Parade Candy. Like Dude, Youre Hyped? I Am Also Hyped, Im In

I forgot how excited little kids get for parade candy. Like dude, you’re hyped? I am also hyped, I’m in a fucking parade. And I get to choose how much candy YOU get.

Aziraphale shielding Crowley from water

and Crowley shielding Aziraphale from fire

I wonder what everyone was doin’ in Boston today in 1919…

There is this guy I like next to who wears these dirty, ugly, slightly broken, yellow Crocs every. Fucking. Day. That’s not the issue. The issue is that bro’s feet are hardly in the shoe. He’s really walkin’ around, stepping on the sides. If you’re gonna wear the shoes, actually WEAR the shoes.

Croc Boy wasn’t wearing the Crocs today?? My life is a lie.

Today, I was once again wronged by Emily. Why she sees reason to do this? I am unsure. She claims that I am a homophobic communist. She then told me to go back to where I came from. I am Russian and Native?? We’re in the America?? I’m not a communist?? Emily, you make me my eyes cry.