Bippity Boppity Bow Chicka Wow Oww! Youve Been Visited By The Shameless Hoe Fairy, And Now You Must Share

🧚🏻‍♀️✨Bippity boppity bow chicka wow oww! You’ve been visited by the Shameless Hoe Fairy, and now you must share a hoe drabble about:

Johnny Storm + realizing his feelings for you are real and strong because you’re the first person he’s ever missed while you’re apart 🥺

A/N: This is my first time writing for Johnny Storm so please let me know if I did okay!

"Johnny, what the hell?!" Sue's voice rang from the shared kitchen.

"Whatever it is, I didn't do it" Johnny yelled from his room.

"You were the last person in the kitchen!"

"It still wasn't me!"

Sue storms to Johnny's room to find him in his bed, hugging a sweater you'd left behind a few visits ago. "You're really gonna lay there and try to convince me that you, the last person in the kitchen, after I cleaned it this morning, are not responsible for the half-assed attempt at baking I just walked in on?"

"Well excuse me for trying to do something nice for everyone," Johnny whines.

"What's gotten into you, Johnny? I swear I've never seen you like this."

From further down the hall they hear Ben, "lover boy just misses his girl is all."

"No, I don't," Johnny shouts back at him.

Ben snickers, "I can't see you but I know you're cuddling up with her shirt, ain't you?"

Johnny throws your sweater to the side before pouting, "NO!" Sue smiles fondly as Ben breaks out into a laugh.

At that moment the front door opens, "I'm home!" Richard calls out. Sue turns to greet him but is distracted by Johnny shoving her to the side to run to the door.

"Wait, where's Y/N," Johnny asks. "She was supposed to come back with you."

"Yeah," Reed confirmed. "She wanted to go home and get some rest."

"But..." Johnny can't think straight.

Reed continues, "I asked her if she wanted to come over but she told me, the last time you two went out, you said you wanted some space." Reed shrugs, "I guess she's just giving you what you want."

Johnny starts pouting and angrily grabs the keys to his motorcycle before storming out of the apartment.

Your apartment feels cold and quiet as you enter. You miss Johnny but you don't want to bother him, especially after he said he was feeling a little "smothered". You flinch at the memory.

"Ugh, one thing at a time," you tell yourself as you start putting your things away. It was a long trip and you feel exhausted. Maybe a shower and some sleep will cure your ills.

A shower certainly does help but you still find yourself feeling lonely. Maybe Johnny was on to something. Maybe you do spend too much time with him and not enough alone. You put on some pajamas, order delivery from your favorite pizza place, and settle in on the couch for some alone time.

Too soon to be the pizza, you hear an insistent knock at the door. Confused you head over and look through the peephole. It's Johnny! As soon as the door is open he's pulling you into a deep kiss, complete with a warm hug.

"I'm so sorry," he says when he pulls away. "I'm so sorry I said I need space. I don't need space, I need my head examined. I missed you so much. So much more than I've ever missed anyone. I'm sorry I tried to push you away."

You gently rub his cheek while giving him some reassuring coos. Neither of you realized the door was still open until the pizza arrived. The two of you settled on the couch to eat. You thought to sit on the opposite side but Johnny pulled you close, until you were practically sitting on his lap.

"I need you to know," he whispers after finishing a slice, "why I said what I said." You turn to face him, making sure he knows he has your attention. "I've...I've never been one for things like long-term relationships. No one who knows me thinks I'm even capable of anything more than just...casual hookups or convenience relationships, like you and I have."

You nod your understanding and he continues, "I was trying to keep that reputation when I told you we were spending too much time together. But this last week, without you being around at all? Fuck, I, I have to admit, I'm in love with you."

His confession leaves you wide-eyed, "you really mean that?"

"Yes," he replies with a look you've dubbed his "serious face".

"I accept your apology, and your confession," you hum. "But you owe me."

"Name your price, Fire Lily," he breathes.

"You have to give me back the sweater your keep in your room."

Updating to make sure tags are included:

@alicedopey

New Postion

Smutty/filthy. Please be warned. Age gap. This just had to happen as I have a soft spot for broody men. Sorry

Please leave comment below

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Lunch Visitor

Pairing: Aesop Sharp x Professor!Reader Requested? Nope, this is a little self-indulgent piece tbh Plot: Aesop has been stopping by your classroom during lunch lately.

Aesop started coming to your classroom during lunch a week ago. He didn't stop by every day, but every few days or so. It was curious, and you were wondering why he suddenly had free time to visit you. During lunch, he normally tended to his duties in the classroom while the students were away for a while.

The first time he came by, he asked you about a potential new potion he was thinking about teaching to his students. You gave him your opinion of course, but instead of leaving after getting an answer, he stayed and sat with you for the remainder of lunchtime.

Today when he stopped by, you were sipping on some tea made from a tea blend that Mirabel had given you, and munching on some custard tarts while you worked on grading the arithmancy homework your students had turned in.

"Did you come by to help me grade this homework?" You call out when you hear the door open, because although your back was turned to it, you knew it was Aesop.

"There's a reason I chose to teach potions and not arithmancy," Aesop replies as he approaches the table you're working at, and you can't help but grin at his words. Normally that's the closest thing to humor you're going to get out of him.

You turn to look up at him as he sits down, and you offer him a soft smile before you motion to the tea pot that was sitting nearby.

"Tea?" You ask, and he gives you a silent nod before you begin to pour him a cup, and you slide it and the saucer over to him. "Mirabel made the blend for me. It's delightful," You tell him as you lean back in your seat, and watch him take a drink from his cup. He looks pleased with it.

"You know, you always tell your students that you're too busy to speak when class isn't in session. But you have time to sit here with me?" You ask him more as a joke, but you could swear you heard him chuckle.

"Perhaps I'd rather spend my free time with you than entertaining their questions that I've answered countless times," He tells you with a slight raise of his eyebrows, and you were just hoping he would miss the blush that rose to your cheeks.

"What are you trying to tell me, Aesop?" You ask him, hoping you would be able to get more out of him.

He actually chuckles then, and he takes another drink of his tea before he sets down the little cup. By now he has an... affectionate look in his eyes.

"I'm trying to tell you that I'd like to see you outside of work, Y/N. Let me take you out one day,"

While you were hoping for this response from him, you couldn't help but still feel surprised by it. You send him a little nod, and he smirks slightly before he leans forward and snags a tart from your plate.

"Splendid. And I'm going to take one of these since you depleted my stash of toffees that were in my desk," He tells you, and your eyes widen slightly; you didn't think he would notice that you would take one... or a few when you would stop by the potions classroom.

Troublemakers ~ Aesop Sharp x Gaunt!Reader

Summary: Just a little story of Aesop and his best friend and childhood sweetheart going on an adventure that turns out to be more than they could take on, which ends up as one of the catalysts between them losing contact after Hogwarts… Only to end up meeting against, at the most unlikely of places, over a decade later.

“I am SO bored.” Y/N sighed dramatically, plopping on the couch next to her best friend, Aesop Sharp, a particularly brilliant half-blood that excelled in DADA and Potions especially. It was no surprise that the two would always pair up for Potions, they were a terrific duo and the teacher always praised them. “Not much room for new adventures, unfortunately.” the boy with long, chestnut hair nodded his head in agreement. “There is so much exploring to do at Hogwarts, but we’re stuck here, with no lead.” Y/N suddenly turned to her friend, grabbing him with the arms desperately. “You’re the future Auror, aren’t you? You’re supposed to smell danger and adventure! Do something!” the poor boy looked weirdly at her, putting his hand over her wrists and suspending them in mid-air. “Calm down, you little troublemaker, I’ll think of something. I  always do, don’t I?” he offered a mischievous smirk. “Now, how about you stop bothering me and you do something useful with that energy of yours - Like, for example, retrieving THAT book you promised me?” no doubt, he was referring to her having promised to sneak into the restricted section of the library to find more advanced potions and dark arts spell books. After all, how better to know how to guard yourself against the dark arts, if not by learning about them? That is an Auror’s job. “Right. I almost forgot.” the girl muttered, nodding lightly. “A’ight! What’s the time… Ah, yes, just the perfect time for a raid. I’ll see you tomorrow - At our spot.”

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Sharpuary day 18: cold

18+ MINORS AND THOSE WITHOUT AGE IN BIO DNI

tags: @illiana-mystery, @iobsessoverfictionalmen

warnings: swearing

I frowned as I stepped closer to Aesop. Black stood in the middle of the impromptu training exercise, dressed in head to toe furs while the rest of the teachers struggled to stay warm. Warming charms were constantly muttered under breath but it wasn’t doing much good to fight the cold.

“You frozen yet?” Aesop asked softly as black droned on in the background.

“Yeah.” I shivered. Aesop opened his coat and let me duck inside it with him. The warmth I found there made me sigh in contentment. “What the fuck did you do to this thing?” I asked as he wrapped me up in the fabric.

“Warming charm.” He said. I narrowed my eyes at him but kept my mouth shut. Instead, I tucked myself under his arm and wrapped my arms around him. Aesop rubbed his hand along my back trying to warm me up more. Not long after, black let us trudge back into the castle. Aesop opted to use the floo network instead. When we got to his rooms, a fire roared to life.

“damn this feels good after nearly freezing to death out there.” I moaned as I laid down on the rug in front of the fire. Aesop chuckled as he put his coat over the back of the couch.

“You want to know my secret?” He asked. I nodded as I sat up. Aesop sat down and pulled a small lantern out of his coat pocket. “Fire making spell.” He laughed as I grabbed the lantern out of his hand.

“Aesop sharp you devil!” I laughed. He shrugged. “Damn. No wonder you were the only one who wasn’t freezing. I’m so doing this next time.”

“I don’t know. I kind of enjoyed sharing body heat with you.” He shrugged. I climbed up on the couch next to him and kissed him softly.

“I did too.” I admitted. “I’d rather freeze than not do that again.” Aesop hummed in agreement before pulling me in for another kiss.

Casual (pt. 2) >> Johnny Storm

pairing: johnny storm x popstar!reader (no use of y/n)

word count: 3k

summary: Johnny always meant to keep it casual with you but unfortunately for him, he wasn't so good at sticking to his word this time.

warnings: reader gets dangled off the empire state building but i think that's it-

a/n: @fwskullz asked me to write a part two so here it is! sorry it took so long, i did in fact move to college-

“So I really messed up.”

Even though the concert had finished a few minutes ago, Johnny’s eyes were still glued to where you were just performing center-stage.

“No kiddin’, Bic-Head,” Ben chuckled. “I ain’t never seen any of your exes so ticked off ‘atcha. And you’ve had a lot–and I mean a lot–.”

“Thank you, Ben,” Johnny growled, whirling around to face the other man. “We get the point!”

“I don’t know how you’re going to get out of this one, Johnny,” Suzie winced. “She looked really upset with you.”

“I didn’t even know the two of you broke up,” Reed blinked, always the one out of the loop.

“Technically we were never really together,” Johnny halfheartedly defended himself.

“Johnny,” Sue cocked a skeptical eyebrow at him. “She wrote a song about you called ‘Casual’. I think it’s safe to say that’s precisely what she’s mad about.”

Johnny groaned, covering his face with his hands.

“I’d better go talk to her, huh?”

Ben clapped him on the shoulder with mock sympathy, briefly knocking him off-balance.

“Yeah kid, I think you’d better.”

⭑*•̩̩͙⊱••••✩••••̩̩͙⊰•*⭑

You were backstage in your dressing room after the show, seated in front of the vanity mirror as you brushed out your hair, when there was a knock on your door.

“Come in!” You called in reply, putting your brush down nonchalantly as you were used to these sorts of various intrusions preceding and following a show.

You watched the door through its reflection in the mirror and leapt from your seat when you saw the first person through the door.

“Sue!” You cried happily, dashing over to wrap her in your arms. “I didn’t think you were coming!”

It was sort of true. You really didn’t think she was coming, but only because you’d forgotten that you’d invited her in the first place. As you held her in your arms, the day you delivered the tickets to her began to trickle back into your memory. It must have been at least four or five months ago now but even still, you can’t believe you forgot. It wasn’t until you heard the door shut that it finally occurred to you: if she was here, then most likely so was–.

Your eyes flew open over Sue’s shoulder and you immediately locked eyes with the blond man leaning against the doorframe, flanked by Sue’s boyfriend Reed and his best friend Ben. You gave Johnny a pointed sneer as you pulled away from Sue, stepping around her to first embrace Reed and then completely ignore Johnny as you sidestepped him to plant a kiss on Ben’s cheek.

“What, no greeting for an old flame?” Johnny opened his arms toward you.

You turned, considering him for a moment before plastering on a fake smile and approaching him slowly. Instead of the warm embrace he expected though, as soon as you got close enough you greeted him with a hearty slap across the face.

“Thought that when I told you to go to hell, the ‘and stay there’ was implied,” you snarled.

“Okay, that’s fair,” Johnny cringed, rubbing his cheek which was now burning red. “I deserve that.”

“You deserve worse than that but seeing as your family’s here, consider it a compromise.”

You turned to the other three who were watching you with a combination of shock and awe and smiled, gesturing at the seating around the coffee table at the center of the room.

“Please, sit! It’s really been too long since I’ve seen you three.”

You led the way, occupying a plush armchair while the other three squeezed onto the couch across from it. Johnny, who you were very purposefully not looking at, hovered somewhere back across the room, investigating the space as you spoke.

“So what mayhem have you three been getting into across the galaxy?” You smiled conspiratorially.

“Oh you know,” Sue waved you off. “New planets, weird plants, alien races—the usual. You on the other hand have been on a world tour! I want to hear about that.”

“Oh gosh,” you giggled, allowing yourself for the first time in months to have missed this—missed them. “Wow um, performing a lot, of course. Partying at night, writing on the rare occasion I have downtime. Speaking of, what did you guys think of that new song?”

“Personally, I loved it,” Ben chimed in immediately, smirking patronizingly at Johnny. “I mean, that last part—“

“The outro?” You suggested.

“Yeah, that!” Ben agreed enthusiastically. “Absolutely brutal. I’m sure whoever you wrote it about feels real sorry now.”

“Thank you, Ben,” you replied earnestly. “Even if he didn’t care about me before, I’m sure he does now.”

“I always cared about you!” Johnny piped up indignantly from the corner.

“Did you guys hear something?” You asked the three sitting across from you. “Must have been the wind.”

“That’s really mature, you know that?” Johnny snarked.

“Oh, that’s rich coming from you!” You snorted. “Now please keep it down over there—I’m trying to catch up with the members of your family who aren’t lying, manipulative pieces of shit.”

“Okay, that’s enough,” Susan stood up, Reed and Ben following suit.

“Wait, Sue, I’m sorry,” you quickly apologized. “I was out of line, just—.”

“I didn’t say he didn’t deserve it,” Sue sighed, crossing to your side of the table and kneeling to rest your hands in hers. “Look, I’m not sure what happened between you two and I’m not going to pretend I do. Whatever you’re feeling is valid and I have no doubt it’s probably justified too. But just… do me a favor and hear him out, okay? He’s a boy and he’s stupid but he has a good heart. Whatever happened, he feels awful about it and he wants to fix it. Just give him a chance to explain himself, please?”

You glanced over Sue’s head to where Johnny was watching the exchange. When he saw you looking, he pressed his hands together and mouthed ‘Please?’. As much as you hated to admit it, you couldn’t deny the flicker of affection that sparked in your chest.

“Fine,” you conceded, standing to open the door for Sue, Reed, and Ben. “You get five minutes and then I’m either letting you three back in or kicking you all out.”

They followed you to the door and out, Ben first, then Reed, and then Sue after she stopped to hug Johnny and whisper in his ear: “You're welcome. Don't mess this up.” When they were finally out the door, all three gave Johnny various pointed looks as you shut it behind you, leaning against it with your arms crossed and eyebrows raised in reluctant anticipation.

“Look, I was an idiot—I am an idiot,” he opened.

“This is a surprise to absolutely no one,” you quipped. “Go on.”

Johnny sighed, running a nervous hand through his blond curls.

“I didn’t realize you were the best thing in my life until you were gone.”

“I broke things off with you months ago, Johnny. Why here, why now? You could have called.”

“Would you have answered?” He asked genuinely.

“God dammit, Johnny, you could have tried!” You forced down the lump in your throat. “As someone who stopped seeing you because I didn’t feel wanted, you’re not doing a great job of convincing me I was wrong about you.”

Johnny hung his head, knowing you were right. Hell, he didn’t realize he missed you until a couple of hours ago—how was he going to convince you he really wanted you back? But the next thing you said gave him an idea that would either make or break your relationship depending on how well he stuck to his word.

“I mean, how would you even start a relationship with me right now, Johnny?” You thought out loud. “I’m on tour, I’m in a new city every day. And it’s not exactly like you can drop everything and follow me around given your line of work.”

“I have an idea.”

You looked very much like you didn’t trust him as far as you could throw him, but you looked intrigued too. You nodded, urging him to continue.

“I’ll wait for you.”

You barked out a disbelieving laugh.

“You’re kidding, right? Johnny, I’m on tour for the next three months. You’re telling me you’re not going to see a single girl that whole time?”

“That’s exactly what I’m telling you. You think I can’t do it?”

“No, Johnny, full offense but I really don’t think you can.”

“So I’ll prove you wrong. And when I do, you’ll owe me a date.”

You squinted your eyes at him, not believing him at all but willing to let him at least try.

“Fine,” you sighed. “If you can wait for me—and I mean really wait, I don’t wanna see you with another girl in the tabloids or on Instagram or anywhere—then I promise to go on one date with you. No promises after that.”

“Yes!”

He pumped his fist and you shook your head exasperatedly, extending a hand for him to shake.

“You’ve got yourself a deal, Lowell Spencer.”

“In the spirit of apologies, I’m going to let that slide.”

“How kind of you.”

You shook on it.

⭑*•̩̩͙⊱••••✩••••̩̩͙⊰•*⭑

If you had known three months ago that your deal with Johnny would end in you being dangled off the Empire State Building by New York’s villain-of-the-week, you might have reconsidered your decision. You hadn’t even been in New York when you woke up that morning—you’d been preparing for the final performance of your tour in Los Angeles. Unfortunately for you though, distance is nothing to an alien who can create portals out of thin air, and thus instead of celebrating the final night of your tour with thousands of your adoring fans, some space freakazoid was threatening your life in front of millions of people on live television.

You didn’t even know what the guy wanted. He’d been monologuing obnoxiously at you since he yanked you from your dressing room and through the portal to New York but apparently there weren’t any public speaking classes in space because you had absolutely no clue what he was on about. Odds are, he probably wanted to take over the city or something but whatever it was, you only hoped that Johnny would figure it out in time. The man (if you could even call it that… what were aliens’ stances on gender?) holding you hostage had made it very clear that you were the bargaining chip for Johnny specifically. As it were currently though, the flamebrain in question was nowhere to be found. Three of the four were gathered high up in the air on one of Sue’s invisible forcefield things but it was evident that wherever Johnny was, he was too preoccupied to come save your life. Figures.

You couldn’t really hear much over the combination of blood pumping in your ears and the wind rushing by but from what you could see, it appeared as though everyone around you was doing an awful lot of talking as opposed to saving like you were hoping for. Thinking on it though, given that you were over a thousand feet in the air, how much saving could the other three really do without Johnny? It wasn’t like any of them could fly. Did this mean you were doomed? Your train of thought seemed to be corroborated by the sudden rrrrrrrip of the back of your bodysuit that the villain was suspending you by. The tear didn’t rip through the costume completely but you squeaked pathetically as the separating fabric dropped you closer to your impending doom a thousand feet below.

Realistically, you realized you should have alerted the Three to your escalating problem but in the adrenaline of the moment, you couldn’t bring yourself to open your mouth, let alone make any voluntary noise or coherent commentary. How did they (and Johnny) do this every day? Performing for crowds of thousands was a walk in the park compared to this. This was horrible. If you made it through this, you were going to tell all four of them how grateful you were for the sacrifices they all made on their mental health.

Once again, your train of thought was interrupted by a bigger, louder rrrrrrriiiip as the costume tore some more. You tried harder to say something, anything but looking down and seeing the city over a thousand feet below you stole your breath in a not-so-pleasant way that had you both choking and hyperventilating at the same time. You managed to tear your eyes away from the ground and over to the Fantastic Three-Fourths but by the time that happened, you were only able to squeak out a “Help” before your costume split clean in half and you were falling backwards through the New York City skyline.

If anyone were to ask you, you would most definitely not recommend freefall. Why anyone would do this willingly was beyond you. If it wasn’t before, skydiving was definitely off your bucket list now. Though you guessed that maybe it was different when you chose it as opposed to having it thrust upon you in the form of some deranged, costume-wearing alien. Forget gratitude, you thought. I probably won’t live through this but if I do, I’m going to give Johnny a real piece of my mind. 

When you asked Johnny about it later, the thing he said haunted him the most in the nights that followed was the sound of your screams as he pushed his flames to grow hotter, stronger, begging them to help him gather velocity and just please god get to her in time—. You don’t remember screaming. All you remember is the force of the wind against your back and the brightness of the sky above as you plummeted rapidly toward the concrete below. It happened in the blink of an eye—one moment you were certain the puffy clouds above would be the last thing you’d ever see, and the next, your vision was bombarded with red hot flames and your stomach swooped as you were swiftly grabbed around the waist as Johnny changed direction.

He flew you both around the corner so the Empire State was out of sight before making your descent back onto solid ground. You swayed on your feet for a moment, Johnny’s arms shooting out to catch you when your knees inevitably buckled. He pulled you in even closer to him, tucking your head securely into his chest, and you allowed it for a beat as you caught your breath before suddenly tearing yourself from his grasp and pounding your fists against his chest.

“Where the hell were you!” You seethed. “I almost died, Jonathan Lowell Spencer Storm!”

“I know, I know,” he tried to take hold of your wrists, gently caressing them with his thumbs, but you ripped them away to continue beating your fists against his chest.

“Three months ago, you said you would wait for me but here we are three months later and you couldn’t care less that I was being dangled over the edge of the freakin’ Empire State Building—!”

“I was in LA,” he defended as you continued talking over him.

“—So much for second chances, huh? What’s your excuse this time? You were away visiting your hot model friend in Ibiza?”

“I was in LA!” He repeated louder this time, trapping your face between both of his abnormally warm hands and tilting it to face him.

You stopped short, taking in a few breaths as your mind struggled to catch up with his claim.

“What the hell do you mean, you were in LA?” You squinted at him in suspicion. “I thought superheroes didn’t take vacations, what were you doing in LA of all places?”

“Waiting for you to perform,” his eyes stared into yours with a devotion so intense you almost didn't believe you were looking at the real Johnny.

“What?” You blinked in disbelief. “Johnny, if this is a joke, it isn’t funny.”

“I’m not joking, sweetheart.”

The corners of his lips tilted up nervously, self-consciously. You didn’t think he was capable of it, but there he was. Your eyes flickered rapidly between his, trying to catch him out in a lie, but you couldn’t find one. You couldn’t help it—you kissed him. And damn, if it didn’t feel good after over a year of angst and pining that you thought would never be requited. After a moment of letting your mind run away from you, you pulled away from him, resting your hands over his pounding heart and your forehead against his.

“Wait,” you panted. “You really haven’t seen any other girls in the last three months?”

“Haven’t had to when I knew I had you waiting for me.”

He went back in for another kiss but you used the leverage of your hands on his chest to hold him away from you.

“Ah-ah-ah, not so fast, you temptress.”

He chuckled darkly, eyes fluttering lustfully between your eyes and your lips.

“You swear you haven’t seen any other girls since I last saw you,” you confirmed.

“Not one,” he squeezed your hip affectionately. “I swear it.”

You couldn’t help it any longer. You sunk your fingers into his golden curls and pulled him back to your lips, smiling when you felt how he melted against you. Unfortunately for you though, this wasn’t the time for your happy reunion. Johnny frowned and looked adorably confused when you pulled away again.

“What did I do now?”

You giggled, giving him another peck for the road before gently pushing him away.

“You gotta go save the world, Flamebrain,” you backed away with a flirty wink. “I’ll be waiting.”

And even through all your hardships, as Johnny flamed on and flew back toward New York’s newest resident space loser, you couldn’t help but feel like the luckiest girl in the world.