Stay With Me, Please

stay with me, please

warnings: SELF-HARM, ATTEMPTED SUICIDE, mention of death, depression, language

a/n: please do NOT read this if you are sensitive on the topics in listed above. I do not support the topics. if you feel alone, call the suicide prevention hotline: 1-800-273-8255. please remember that you are loved, and when times get tough, it’s just a rough patch in your life, but it’ll be over with soon. look on the bright side of things. treat yourself with love and care. i love you all ♡

*i personally have never had an experience on this topic, but a very close friend of mine has, she took therapy and is better than ever now. feel free to talk to me by clicking ‘ask me anything.’ i myself have suffered from depression. i tried to cut myself and was only able to cut my fingertip. i have a habit of not eating a lot of food and trying to stay quiet, not to attract attention to myself. nobody knows about it, not even my family or close friends. i know it’ll get better. i will make a post just on this because i’ve typed too much of this on my lil’ fic here, which have more parts to come, so enjoy!*

masterlist

pt.1 | pt. 2

Tears fell from your eyes as you looked at your wrist. The razor blade was lodged into your arm, causing the red, warm, liquid rapidly spill out. You kept going until it was 8 cuts.

The bathroom floor had patches of blood covering it, but most of the blood made it into the sink. You used a hand cloth to wipe up all the red stains and washed the cloth in the sink. You made sure there weren’t any red spots left in the sink, and continued on to prepare a bath.

You slowly sank into the warm water, the blood from your arms colouring the water red. As you sat there, the tears flowing down your cheeks slowly started to come to a halt.

Then, you heard the familiar sound of your front door opening, “Darling? Are you home?”

In a rush, you stood up and out of the bathtub, and drained it. You washed it over twice to make sure there was no more opaque, red, liquid floating in the tub.

He must’ve heard the water run because the next thing you knew, he was opening the bathroom door.

Luckily, you already had slipped on his hoodie, covering your somewhat bloody scars.

“H-Hey, Tommy. You’re back early.” You stuttered, still uneasy from earlier.

“Y/N, darling, I’ve missed you! I came back to surprise you!” Tom shone, the smile on his face widens.

“What’re you doing in the bathroom?” He questioned, looking confused.

“I was just, um, taking a bath.” You excused.

“In the middle of the day?” Tom connected eyes with you, trying to break through your protective shield. You noticed his motives, and quickly look away.

“Yeah, what’s wrong with taking a nice, warm, bath in the middle of the day?” You falsely giggled.

“But, you said that taking baths in the afternoon was dumb?” Tom tried to remember.

You bite the inside of your mouth, silently cursing yourself out because you did tell him that before.

“Just was tired, let it go?” You sighed. He could feel the tension, so he let it go.

For the following weeks, you continued to cut, while Tom started to notice the loss of energy you’d have when he came back. He also started to notice the small things, like you had had a hard time falling asleep, or you would always wear his hoodies or your long-sleeved clothing items.

One day, Tom woke up to the great smell of eggs and toast coming from the first floor.

“Love?” He walked down the stairs. To his surprise, he saw you making his favourite breakfast meal. “What’re you doing?” A smile flashed across his fatigued face.

“What d’you think, you doofus?” Your giggle was fake. If only he knew that this was his last breakfast with you.

You placed the toast and eggs onto the white plate, handing it to him. Then, you poured him a cup of coffee to enjoy with his “extravagant” breakfast. You ate the leftover eggs and drank some coffee.

“I gotta go, love, but I’ll be back later,” He kissed your forehead. You took in his affection while you could.

“Tom,” You called out before he could leave the flat, “I love you,” You quickly, or tried to, walk over to him and give him the most passionate kiss you could.

“I love you, too, darling,” He chuckled.

“Bye,” You smiled and waved.

“Bye, love,” He rolled his beautiful, brown eyes.

Tom found your actions weird since you hadn’t been this affectionate ever, especially for the past few weeks, but he ignored his suspicions, and happily drove to work.

Once he was out of your sight, you ran, the fastest you’ve ever been, up the stairs, and into the bathroom. You pulled out the large blade and started cutting large, deep, cuts into yourself. Every place you could possibly cut, you cut. You were so numb from the pain, you didn’t feel the impact when you fell to the cold, tiled, floor.

“Y/N? Darling? Where are you? I forgot my phone here. Could you grab it from the room?” Tom’s voice rang through your ears.

No! He can’t be back. No! Go away, Tom! Please.

“Babe? Where are you?” You could hear his heavy footsteps rushing up the staircase.

Please don’t come in here, please don’t come in here, please don’t come in here.

Tom pushed the door open, practically running to my side.

“Y/N? Love? Are you there? Please respond!” He shouted, tears rapidly falling from his eyes.

I caused him pain.

“Stay with me! I love you, Y/N.” His voice cracked.

“Hello? Yes, I need an ambulance! M-My girlfriend. She’s dying. She cut herself and the blood won’t stop coming out. She’s becoming pale! Please hurry!” He sobs into the phone.

“Stay with me, please. I love you,” He kissed your forehead. Then, darkness.

The faint sounds of the ambulance sirens vibrated through your head. Then, you heard Tom’s voice.

“Don’t go, baby, please don’t,” His voice was quivering.

“I love you, so many people love you. Please stay.” Tom’s hand tightens around yours.

Lies. Nobody loves me. No one will. No one has. I’m alone.

how’s your day going? i opened up tumblr to see that i has over 100 notifications 🖤 thank you guys so much for the support 🥰

☽ masterlist ☽

all rights reserved © tomthesoftie - do not repost without credit, translate, or claim as your own

angst - ✧

fluff - ☼

nsfw - ☆

☁︎ requests are closed ☁︎

✴︎ masterlist deux ✴︎

❖ prompt list ❖

T O M    H O L L A N D

B L U R B S / O N E - S H O T S

karma ☼ | tom makes a joke that doesn’t end in his favour

i don’t even know you anymore ✧ | your relationship with tom goes downhill, but will fate reignite this love?

insecure ✧ | self-consciousness can be a bitch sometimes, and when tom comes home, it has to act out

i didn’t do it ✧ ☼ ☆ | tom is left to supervise the Holland household, but something goes wrong

slurp ☼ | tom gets slurped

holiday friendliness ☼ | you are enjoying your day when you literally bump into tom (tom x male!reader)

english terms ☼ | tom uses english terminology during your family dinner, leaving you and your family confused

blessing ☼ ☆ | y/n gets locked out of the house naked and a perverted tom just happens to be there

mystery skater ☼ | tom is awestruck by a gorgeous mystery woman at the rink

dominance ☼ | y/n gets caught recording tom singing and tries to get her phone back

falling ✧ ☼ | tom goes through a harsh breakup with y/n and everything’s going downhill

sex playlist ☼ ☆ | y/n finds out about a little secret tom kept from her

the clouds ☼ | tom admires y/n in her peaceful state

shitty days ✧ ☼ | y/n isn’t feeling herself for a few days. all goes wrong for her

protective ✧ ☼ | y/n is tom’s sister and in a relationship with a clout chaser

late night cuddles ☼ | y/n has a nightmare and tommy is there to help her... with cuddles

why ☼ | tom comforts y/n through her the rise of skywalker depression 

pregnant ✧ ☼ | y/n holland has a pregnancy scare

quarantine ☼ | self-isolation with tommy boy

lover of mine ✧ ☼ | frat!tom took his relationship with y/n for granted, but can he fix it?

this is awkward ☼ ☆ | tom and y/n get caught mid-love making

trick shot fail ☼ | tom accidentally hurts y/n while practicing trick shots

cake ☼ | tom loves cakes, especially y/n’s

what do you want to eat ☼ | tom has a slight slip up and doesn’t realize he said he wanted to eat y/n

my fault ✧ ☼ | mob!tom leaves y/n alone at a party unprotected and she encounters a problem

15 months, wasted ✧ ☼ | y/n is cheated on by her former partner and goes to tom for comfort

i won’t say i’m in love ☼ | y/n learns to accept her feelings for tom after being heartbroken by another

man child ☼ | soft moments with y/n and soft!mob!child!tom

pillow talk ☼ | tom and y/n can’t sleep

cruel envy v.1 v.2 ✧ ☼ | fwb!tom fell in love with y/n even though it was against the rules *two different pov: ‘her’ and ‘you’* 

during conferences ☆ | mob!tom getting naughty during his meetings

irreplaceable ✧ ☼ | y/n accidentally break something of mob!tom’s and becomes worried that he’ll be mad at her

at peace ✧ | as a contract killer, y/n is trained to a high extent but what if it all goes wrong and her life comes crashing down

plank over me ☼ ☆ | y/n has an idea for tom and her to attempt but it takes a steamy turn *mild smut*

sweaty tease ☼ | after a hot day gardening, y/n needs to shower but tom wants cuddles

birthday sex ☆ | y/n surprises thomas with some morning birthday sex

taken for granted ✧ ☼ | y/n hears mob!tom talking about her behind her back and feels betrayed / hurt

in each other’s arms ☼ | y/n and tom were enemies ever since childhood. they get locked in a room together with no way out. cold and late at night, they have nothing to do but sleep

you lied angst ending fluff ending ✧ ☼ | mob!tom is kindest person y/n has ever met, but when it comes to tom’s job, he’s ruthless. y/n doesn’t know this, though. tom tried to prevent her from ever knowing, but one day... *alternate endings*

oral lesson ☆ | y/n leads tom through oral sex

missing him  ✧ | tom left to film cherry for 4 months and hasn’t contacted y/n, his girlfriend, since. she doesn’t react well to this *eventual fluff*

stay away from me ✧ | mob!tom’s horny ass takes any chance of a good fuck, sadly, it isn’t with you  

the worst of you ✧ | “give me the worst of you ‘cause i’ll want you anyway” in which you are in a toxic relationship with frat!tom

their suspicions ☼ | harry, haz, and tuwaine begin to notice a change between you and tom, so they come up with a plan. make tom jealous

the three words ✧ ☼ | fwb!tom let’s the three forbidden words i love you slip out in his state of euphoria and hurts his best friend, y/n

for the best ✧ | richkid!tom had a past relationship with a girl he was in love with. the love was mutual, but you came in a broke them apart. you begin to notice your faults and put tom ahead of you, although tom may not agree with this decision

cocky head ☆ | y/n and frat!tom are shoved in a closet together when tom “second head” needs release

fractured trust and broken friendships ✧ | to keep up his reputation, tom manipulates y/n, his best friend. one day, she runs late to school and overhears tom boasting about it *panic attack warning*

a stupid mistake ✧ ☼ | “This wasn’t an argument between to lovers anymore; it was an interrogation between a surprised victim and the devil.” mob!tom 

failed surprises ✧ ☼ | left alone for days, waiting for her mobster boyfriend to come back from his “business trip,” y/n loses contact with tom and worry overpowers her logic

skin ‘n teeth ☆ ✧ | “bite me” mob!tom x brat!reader

exam motivation drabble ☼ | there isn’t really a story to this. really, it’s, hopefully, a motivator for students, whatever age, to work hard in school and life. i hope this helps you destress and find your comfortable environment to study in. *destress blurb* 

two-for-one reward ☆ ☼ | hard work always pays off, and the reward always varies mob!tom 

her hidden crystal tears ✧ | keeping a relationship under covers isn’t an easy feat. when a popular, successful jock of a college, who has many obsessive fans, dates an average student, they decide that it’s better to keep their relationship secret due to safety reasons, but when the jock starts to become more ignorant of how their s/o is feeling, what might happen to their barely stable relationship? jock!tom 

let them flow ✧ ☼ | after the collapsing of an unhealthy relationship, each side begins to improve and thrive, one for the other, one for themselves. coincidentally, they meet at the same dreaded party that led to the breaking of their relationship. will this unfortunate series of events lead them to opportunity? (alt. ending to her hidden crystal tears) jock!tom

bilateral contracts ☆ ✧ | a relationship turned contract… or has the relationship always been a contract? no longer does it matter, just kiss and make break up koh!tom

M U L T I - C H A P T E R

stay with me, please pt.1 pt.2 ✧ | tom doesn’t know his girlfriend had depression ever since she was a child, until one day something goes terribly wrong *suicide warning*

moonlight pt.1 pt.2 pt.3 ✧ | the king of hell ignores his significant other for weeks and is caught flirting with other girls, how will y/n react? *indefinite hiatus*

admitting pt.1 pt.2 pt.3 pt.4 ☼ | enemies to lovers!tom falls for the girl that he despises and that despises him, but he won’t admit it, to himself or her *hiatus*

laundry day pt.1 pt.2 ✧ ☼ ☆ | y/n has a shitty day and goes to the library in very skimpy clothes because it’s laundry day *eventual smut*

is this seat taken pt.1 pt.2 ✧ ☼ ☆ | y/n is just trying to enjoy her art class, but frat!tom has to come and ruin it *eventual smut*

cheesy spoilers pt.1 pt.2  ☼ | tom can’t help it when he spoils things, so spoiling his valentine’s gift isn’t a surprise

nothing can go wrong teaser pt.1 ✧ ☼ ☆ | “i have a proposition to make. get your tutor to fall in love with you.” *eventual smut* frat!fuckboy!tom x tutor!reader

the right decision pt.1 pt.2 ✧ | you and tom grew up together but always as enemies — nothing more, nothing less. as you grow older, you must realize it’s time to be mature. you either must throw tom out of your life or take him in as an ally. which will you choose? prince!tom x princess!reader

her blood-stained bodysuit pt.1 pt.2 ✧ ☼ | all you wanted was to help your mobster boyfriend. you never expected your plan to go all wrong and result in failure. when you return home with blood soaking your suit and drying in your hair, how does Tom react? mob!tom x assassin!reader

I N C O R R E C T   Q U O T E S

jar of cookies ☆ | dirty joke 

ho ho, the mistletoe ☼ | tom being a shy baby 

blindfolds ☼ ☆ | y/n and tom being a kinky couple

sex is like math ☆ | math, but sexual

i want to be more ☼ | tom’s proposal

graduation reward ☆ | reward for graduating

P E T E R    P A R K E R

B L U R B S / O N E - S H O T S

getting to your head ☼ | y/n gets called a slut and peter’s there to comfort her

I N C O R R E C T   Q U O T E S

thicc bih ☼ | anthony stark and stephen strange concerned for their son

Sorry for all these asks but I'm a guy😅😅 what for mob!tom meeting a male!reader when they're both on holiday? And Tom is just fascinated by the reader and they start talking and become friends?

holiday friendliness

a/n: sorry for not writing this earlier :’(

masterlist

I walked through the filled streets of London, admiring the beautifully made architecture around me.

Colorful lights blinked all around town, decorating the streets. Bells jingling and happy chattering of children roaming the streets were the only sounds heard. The holiday season: the best time of the year. Everybody’s filled with glee and spirit.

I inhaled the refreshing smell of gingerbread cookies, collecting the moments of this hectic winter day. While enjoying the view, I bumped into a masculine figure. A small “oof” came out of my mouth. Looking ahead of me, I saw the well known mobster: Tom Holland.

I quickly apologized with fear, “Oh my, I’m so sorry. I wasn’t paying attention, it’s my fault. I was just enjoying the view of this wonderful winter day, a-and I didn’t see you-”

“It’s okay, mate. I get it, who wouldn’t enjoy a cozy winter day like this?” His deep, accented voice soothed every tense muscle in my body.

“Right,” I sighed, “so what are you doing out here? Especially on such a busy day.”

“I could ask the same for you,” he looks at my slightly muscular body up and down, “say, do you have any plans for today?”

“N-no,” I stuttered as blood rushed to my cheeks.

“If you’d like, we could go out and get some tea or coffee, on me,” Tom winks, “some one on one time for us lads.”

Hey lovey, I just wanted to check up on you and hear if you were doing okay? 💕 I hope whatever you’re going through gets easier, lots of love XX

I’m doing great, thank you for caring 🖤 how are you doing, hopefully you are doing wonderful 👼

update 🖤

I’m so sorry for not posting part 2 of moonlight, but I got sick and then I didn’t use my laptop for this whole week because my father took it away, so I think I’m just going to type it on my phone. I’ll try to get it up by the end of this week. thank you for bearing with me 🥰