Im Not Sure Why Im So Obsessed With The Worm. Im Not Sure Where It Stemmed Form But Golly Me, Do I Love

I’m not sure why I’m so obsessed with the worm. I’m not sure where it stemmed form but golly me, do I love the worm

rose~ pumpkin and babybel wrapper 🤍🦭

YIPPEE ^^ thank you kenny that’s so sweet of you!! 💕

Sunny d mint pumpkin :) for that colour game thingy

awww thank you raph ^^ for me you’re: pumpkin, mint, and rose~ !!!

also why do i scare you sometimes lol? just curious, not at all upset with you!! /genq /nm

coca cola lighttt

how i look

short ace4ace travnat thing !

around 1k words. ace4ace travnat, pre-transition travis, teen timeline, happens during the wilderness but they’re actually good at communicating for plot reasons, internalized aphobia/acephobia

(might rewrite/rework eventually to have more plot lol…feedback is much appreciated!!!)

Travis was used to feeling inadequate. His father constantly berated him for his less-than-masculine attributes or for his hobbies and interests. Travis knew from the age of seven that he would never be enough for his father. He also knew he wouldn’t be enough for his peers, as Bobby Farleigh and the other asshole kids in Wiskayok spread the rumor that he had surgery so he could suck his own dick. The implication was there, loud and clear.

Travis did this so he could suck his dick. Travis sucks dick, and he knows no girl will ever want to suck his.

Perhaps the rejection Travis faced from a young age could explain why meeting Natalie was such a breath of fresh air for him. Nat was in a similar boat to him regarding a lack of parental and peer acceptance. Her peers spread nasty rumors about her, ones saying that she was a slut, or that she was the one who shot her father, having gotten away with his murder.

Travis didn’t really care about her past. All he cared about was how she sat and listened as he told her what Bobby Farleigh did and that she had helped him get the ring for Javi. He cared that she didn't look at him like some sort of freak, as if nothing was redeeming about him. He cared that she looked up at him, her face flushed and her dimples showing, before they both leaned in and had their first kiss.

Travis didn’t care what other people thought about her. Nat didn’t care what other people thought about him. It was a mutual agreement and attraction. So, when they got close enough to the point where there were mentions of their sexual relationship, you can understand Travis’ anxiety about the situation.

Travis had never been enough for anyone but Natalie. He had also never slept with anyone before and, much to his chagrin, never even considered the idea that he would want to sleep with someone. Travis had never had sexual feelings, dreams, or anything else the boys his age spoke of. In truth, he could care less about sex. Still, it was a necessary part of any relationship—he would put up with it if he had to.

But the anxiety crept in, and he found himself feeling inadequate once more. Travis had never slept with anyone, but Nat had. Nat probably had many wonderful experiences with smarter, more handsome, experienced guys. He convinced himself that Nat would only be disappointed by him, so he had been avoiding the topic for as long as he could.

And now, here he was, making out with Nat. Usually, he was much more relaxed, but he couldn’t help but be nervous. He was scared, sitting rigidly and fiddling with the hem of her shirt. Eventually, she pulled away, looking him directly in the eyes.

“Are you okay?”

Travis stares at her lamely, nodding his head. He tries to look more into it than he is, but he feels no attraction to what they’re doing. He loved kissing Nat, but right now, he’d much rather lie with her in bed, with Nat running her fingers through his hair. Travis shifts uncomfortably.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” he asks, the question coming out much harsher than he intends. He’s defensive, nervous that he’s already screwed it all up. Nat looks down at him softly.

“We don’t have to, uh, do anything. If you don’t want to, I mean,” Natalie says, and Travis’ face flushes.

“I can do it,” he says guardedly, pride slightly hurt from the insinuation that he can’t. Nat’s brow furrows.

“I’m not saying you can’t. I’m saying you don’t want to.”

Travis squirms under her intense gaze. She’s surprisingly adept at reading him, despite how briefly they’ve known each other in this way. He averts his eyes from hers, unable to handle the eye contact in his vulnerable state.

“I just– I don't want to, like, ruin our relationship if I’m…not good at this,” he admits, cheeks tinged a crimson color. Nat’s eyes soften further, and she runs her fingers through his hair, something she knows will relax him.

“But…you want to?” She asks, a curious lilt to her voice. Travis thinks for a minute. Does he want to? He’s always been told that his first time will be great, a marker for when he truly becomes a man or some bullshit. But…thinking over the entirety of their relationship, Travis finds that he hasn’t thought about sex with Nat once.

Nervous that it’s some sort of trap, he asks the counter-question, “Do you want to?”

She blinks in confusion, almost as if she’s not used to being asked if this is something she wants. The idea makes Travis feel a little nauseous.

“Not really, “ she eventually mutters, “I could care less if we have sex right now,” she shrugs, although her hands are shaking, and her bottom lip is twitching like she’s ready to apologize and take back everything she’s said. Travis stares up at her. He can’t decide if it’s because she knows he’ll be bad or because she genuinely doesn’t care.

“Do you…not like sex?” He asks. Nat flinches, staring at the wall.

“No,” she mumbles, “I don’t.”

They’re both silent for a minute, Nat staring at the wall and blinking back tears while Travis stares at her in fascination. He’s never actually met anyone else who thinks the same way he does about this.

“Me neither,” he eventually stutters. Nat’s head snapped in his direction, and she looked at him, bewildered.

“What?”

“I don’t– I don’t care about sex. It, uh, doesn’t really seem…appealing?”

Nat nods, urging him to go on. Travis swallows nervously.

“I’ve never really thought about it, other than something I had to do. So, uh…if…if you don’t care, and I don’t, we can just, like, kiss instead?”

He’s afraid he’s messed up when she doesn’t say anything and just stares. Then, she kisses him gently and tenderly. He reciprocates, and the two hold each other close. Maybe they were weird. Perhaps they were freaks of nature. Despite it all, neither truly cared. As long as they had each other, they could be strange together in peace.