YES YES YES Please Read This If You Have The Time

YES YES YES please read this if you have the time

i know for certain that i write unrealistic sex. also, i agree with ppl above—i totally use fanfiction as a way to indulge my preferences or kinks while bypassing most of the aspects of sex irl

communication! consent! safety! preparation! protection! are all absolutely key in real life sex!

try to remember that fiction is not fact—nor is it always going to be applicable to you or your partner(s) personally.

doing your research and crafting a safe sex environment is always more important than attempting to experience something unrealistic and getting hurt in the process. 🥰🥰🥰

Sex stuff you probably won’t learn from fanfiction and/or porn:

Erotic fic and porn can be a lot of fun! But if you aren’t being provided with adequate sex ed through other channels (comprehensive sexual education, frank and open discussions with trusted adults, etc.), turning to fanfic and porn for your understanding of sex is gonna leave some major blindspots and may leave you with some unrealistic expectations. While there’s nothing wrong with these kinds of erotica, they are fictional and tend to leave out a lot of the more realistic, human parts of sex - they serve a great purpose, but that purpose isn’t primarily educational. The following is an incomplete list of some things you should probably know about sex that a lot of fic and porn tends to leave out:

It isn’t always super hot or super sweet. Sometimes it’s super silly. Or sometimes it’s sort of mundane and you’re both simply scratching an itch. That’s fine too. (Hell, sometimes you’re talking about comic books while boning and your partner is laughing that you’re getting REALLY ANGRY about spider-man while they’re going to town on you.)

You will probably not climax at the same moment. It’s a sweet idea, but extremely hard to coordinate, and if all your concentration is going into coming at the exact same moment, you’re probably not enjoying yourselves as much as you might. 

Sometimes bodies make weird, goofy noises. Squelching, slapping, air-escaping, un-sexy noises. It’s okay to laugh at this. 

Hell, it’s okay to laugh during sex in general.

Sometimes you fart. Sometimes you fart while someone is going down on you and it is embarrassing as hell. This isn’t the end of the world. Embarrassing body things happen. Heck, sometimes, with anal, there’s a little poo. You get over it.

Sometimes sex is… kinda bad? This doesn’t mean it’s assault, or something traumatic – sometimes it’s consensual but just kinda bleh and not what you hoped for. The best thing to do (if you’re talking about sex with a partner and not just a hook up who you can not call back) is talk to them about it. Figure out what went wrong, what you enjoy and what you don’t, and communicate what techniques you do and don’t like. Also don’t be afraid to stop someone in the middle of the sex act you’re not enjoying and offer guidance on how to help make it good for you too. (Side tip: masturbation makes great research into what you personally do and don’t enjoy sexually)

You won’t enjoy every sex act. Not every body is wired to find every thing pleasurable. You might find anal does nothing for you. You may find g-spot stimulation just makes you really anxious that you’re about to pee. You may not enjoy giving or receiving oral. You’re not broken if you don’t like something that every pornstar or smutty fanfic protagonist seems to have earth-shattering orgasms from. Everyone’s got nerve endings in a range of places – it’s quite literally, different strokes for different folks.

On that note, not all orgasms are earth-shattering. Sometimes it just feels warm and nice. That’s fine too. 

Sometimes, if you’re neutral on a sex act and your partner loves it, you can suck it up for them, and they’ll suck up something they’re not crazy about for your pleasure in return. But communicate preferences with each other! Know that when a partner does that thing you love that they don’t get much from, that it’s an act of care, and vice versa. 

Falling asleep in each other’s arms right after wild passionate sex seems really romantic, but dried and crusty fluids are gonna be a bitch in the morning. Also, after sex, you should both (regardless of your equipment) go pee to clear out the urethra of any gunk or bacteria to reduce risk of a UTI. 

Putting a towel down on the bed before sex means you don’t have to sleep on wet funky sheets. (it’s also verrrrrry useful for period sex if you or your partner menstruate.)

A lot of people don’t like dirty talk, or rough sex. Always ask first. (Fanfic on the whole does a better job than porn at showing communication, but a lot of it is still highly fictive on this point)

PROTECTION PROTECTION PROTECTION. Use condoms, dental dams, etc. not just to prevent pregnancy, but to reduce risk of STIs. (Yes, even couples with the same genitals who don’t need to worry about pregnancy).

Lube is great and very important, but random goopy things around you are not good lube. Random oils especially, since oil doesn’t flush out well and can trap bacteria inside the body – oil-based lubricant also degrades condoms. Use lube specifically designed for intimate purposes. Water-based and silicone-based lubes help sex feel really good!

Bigger isn’t necessarily better. A lot of people with vaginas don’t enjoy the feeling of being repeatedly punched in the cervix by a monster cock. Some people enjoy a larger size when being penetrated by an appendage or toy and some don’t.

Bodies are hairy. Genitals are hairy. You may get a pube stuck in your teeth at some point. If your partner is WAY fuzzier than porn ever led you to believe they’d be, well, that’s normal. 

Not everyone loves the taste of ejaculate. Sometimes it’s nasty (flavor tends to vary from person to person depending on their diet, but sometimes you just really don’t like it no matter what. Some of us hate the taste of peanut butter. People don’t always like things). It’s okay not to swallow, or to request a penis-having partner warn you so they don’t ejaculate in your mouth (in fact, it’s polite for them to do the latter). 

If you’re gonna have shower sex, get one of those rubbery mats for the shower floor that gives you traction, because otherwise it’s super embarrassing to call for an ambulance while dripping wet and naked because you slipped and accidentally broke something and your partner got a concussion while you were trying to bang in the shower. 

Moaning and screaming wildly during sex is fun but it will make the neighbors in the apartments adjacent to you hate you. Make choices accordingly. 

i fucking love jjk’s subtle design

how gojo’s domain actually looks like they’re inside his eye

~ perfection ~

mmmmm i’m not crying i’m nOT

rengoku wants to give his wife babies this wants to start a family that HOW ABOUT some headcanons of when he's Actually A Father. I want Nice, Warm, Cuddly, Dependable Daddy Rengoku!!

I SAVED THIS ASK SPECIFICALLY FOR TODAY BC IM SEEING MUGEN TRAIN TODAY AND BECAUSE I NEED RENGOKU FLUFF TO WARD OFF THE RENGOKU ANGST THAT MUGEN TRAIN WILL BRING

RENGOKU AS A PAPA OHHH MY GOD..... did somebody say world’s best dad bc lord he is THAT. he’s so kind and passionate and doting and he just has so much love to give, both towards his Beautiful Wife and their children!!!

i like the idea of rengoku with a big family. i can’t really see him stopping at just one kid— i think he wants to make lots of babies with his dear wife and have a big family that’s just full of love and (clenches fist) oh my god no okay pls give this man a big family. please have lots of healthy babies with him bc there’s nothing he wants more than a sweet, happy domestic life with you i swear

you know those baby carriers that hold one baby against your chest and one against your back? pls consider: rengoku with that on and holding two of your kids in it and walking tall and proud like the happy papa he is....

nobody, literally nobody:

rengoku: LOOK AT MY DEAR CHILDREN (whips out his wallet and shows them all the pics he has of your children) OUR YOUNGEST DAUGHTER SAID HER FIRST WORDS LAST WEEK AND I COULDN’T BE PROUDER OF HER!!!!!! (proceeds to talk in depth about each and every one of his children for the next hour)

no okay you all laugh but i’m serious. rengoku is so proud of everything his kids do and he wears the fact that he’s a father now with pride and talks nonstop about his kids to anybody who asks and even people who don’t ask. he talks about his kids as a form of icebreaker conversation, really. he’s just so good. he’s so good and perfect and he wants his kids to know how proud of them he is and how much he loves them at all times, and he’s certainly more than happy to praise them nonstop!!

once the kids start reaching their teen years, the praise becomes embarrassing and “cringey” (in that “ew mom don’t tell me you love me in front of my friends they’ll think i’m a loser” teenager way) for them, but rengoku doesn’t stop even then. there’s nothing more important to him than making sure his family feels loved, special, and safe.

okay so you know how sometimes your parents do little things just to embarrass you? i don’t mean embarrass in a bad way, i mean like, just telling you that they love you in front of your friends and laughing when your friends do that slightly mocking/slightly comedic exaggerated “OMG AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW” because my mom did this when i was a preteen lmao

i bring this up because i think rengoku absolutely tells his kids he loves them in front of their friends, but not with the intention of embarrassing them-- it doesn’t even cross his mind. 

he’s just so genuine and loving that he does for no other reason than to simply remind his kids that he loves them-- even when they do the “omg daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad stop” thing that preteens do, he just smiles and says it again because he loves his kids so much and he wants to make sure they always know that!!! (;_;)

please consider rengoku as the stereotypical dad in movies that’s like “if you want to date my daughter you need my approval” dad because i think this is a very important concept. rengoku being overly protective of his daughters once they start goin on dates in middle/high school..... (sobs a little bit)

ABSOLUTELY, HOLY MOTHER OF CINEMA

Demon slayer: Mugen Train was a God. Damn. Masterpiece.

The music was absolutely stellar. And the art was on par with fuckin Howls Moving Castle - even better if you ask me.

This movie DESERVES to be at the top for years if not decades to come. I cannot even begin to describe the emotions and connections I felt from this beautiful movie and I’ve literally already had a whole night to think about it.

Please. Do yourself a damn favor. Go. See. That. Movie.

Anyways I'm so sorry to everyone but now that I've seen The Demon Slayer movie I'm not going to consume another piece of media for a long time and rengoku is my favorite character I love him so much

So, India is dying.

Look, I know a good number of you are from the US and things aren't amazing there either, but my country is literally on the brink of collapse. So I'd love it if we could talk about that for a minute.

If you can't do anything else, please just read and reblog.

A second COVID wave has taken out the healthcare system. There are no more hospital beds. There's an oxygen shortage. There's a critical vaccine shortage. The Central Government has thrown its hands up and is passing the baton to the State Governments to do what they can.

There are over 16 million covid cases. A record 330,000 new cases reported yesterday - comparable to the US at its peak. 187,000 dead as of today.

There is no plan.

Mass cremations are taking place. The cremation grounds are running day and night and they are short on wood. People are watching their loved ones die while waiting for a hospital bed, and then they're unable to give them the proper burial rights.

Hospitals are overwhelmed. Patients are being confined, two to a bed. They're the lucky ones.

We are on the verge of people dying in the streets.

This is the second-most populous country in the world. The largest democracy. A country that encapsulates over 15,000 years of recorded human history and has endured everything from famine to invasion to colonisation.

We might be at the end. This might be the thing that does us in.

People are dying.

People are dying.

People are dying and there is no plan.

More good news? Variants are popping up. A double mutation strain has shown up. It is resistant to current vaccines. This will not go away. This is the devastation they warned of when the anti-maskers were out protesting the minor inconvenience of covering their face in public.

My country is on the verge of an emergency state. Our government has failed us. This is as dire a situation as it ever could be.

Look. I don't do much with my life. I write fics, some of you have read them and that's pretty much it. I spend my days with my head in the clouds because that's where I like to be.

But two days ago, my grandmother tested positive, had to be taken to hospital and the ambulance caught fire.

She barely made it to the urgent care she needs.

So, here I am, using whatever meager platform I have to cobble this request together. Because I have to do something.

If you can, donate.

Or spread the word.

Help. Please.