I Do Beat Him Up A Lot. For Spike That's Like Third Base.

 I do beat him up a lot. For Spike that's like third base.

Like Fleabag, Crashing is sharp and darkly funny. It’s bursting with sad and self-conscious people awkwardly grappling for a connection.

I just finished watching Crashing and yes yes yes give it to me I love that trope I love it so MUCH!!! People trying to find connection with each other and stumbling through life one awkward, messy situation at a time?? And then realising that they're all aching for the same feelings fundamentally and learning to love their life and the people around them?? Sprinkle a bit of found family on there and it's OVER for me I'm DONE IT'S ALL I NEED

Please go inside. BRIDGERTON, 2.07

Absolutely insane lines to just drop in the middle of an academic text btw. Feeling so normal about this.

[ A Critical History of English Literature, Vol. 1, Prof. David Daiches, first published in 1960 ]

I'll be honest, my biggest takeaway from the sneak peek wasn't, "Yes Pen, read him for filth!" It was, "Oh Pen is totally shame spiralling out of control." Because yes, Penelope has every right to be upset with Colin and tell him why she is upset, but most of the emphasis in this scene is on just how much Penelope hates herself. She doesn't believe Colin when he compliments her dress (a direct parallel to scenes Pen has had with Marina and Edwina in the past), she calls herself a spinster even though she's only 19 (I'm willing to bet Portia refers to Penelope as a spinster at some point before this scene), she assumes Colin sees her as an embarrassment, and again she points out that even though she managed to change her wardrobe, she is still a laughingstock.

This whole scene does way more to demonstrate Penelope's insecurities than it does to paint Colin as someone who needs to grovel for forgiveness. If anything, Colin is handling the situation maturely. He openly communicates his feelings, he doesn't deny what he said, and it's clear he wants to work through the issue.

Penelope is so unhappy with herself that she's taking it out on him more than she should. It's easier to blame him for the one thing he said rather than force herself to look inward. But I think once Colin comes to her again with his plan to help her find a husband, this is going to shift. Penelope will be put in a position where she will have to reflect on those insecurities and Colin will be the one with her on that journey.

Which brings us back to Nicola talking about Penelope putting Colin on a pedestal. He might be off of that pedestal after what he said last season, but she still doesn't view him as a fully flawed human being yet. Once Penelope forgives Colin at the end of 3x01, it's going to open up her eyes and allow her to see Colin as a full human being and as her equal (not as her idol). This is how we get "You're my mess," and "You're the imperfect man of my heart."

what am I supposed to do with this