Volunteerfelinedetectives - Ellington Feint Stan ༺♡༻

Some portraits I did for practice

shit i’ve heard chemistry majors say

- *student in a lab coat, cutting in the cafeteria line* YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND I DON’T HAVE A LOT OF TIME MY EXPERIMENT IS GOING TO CATCH FIREEEE

- *loud pop*    student, in very calm voice: well that was painful

- lab assistant, seeing me frantically pulling on gloves: oh no. what did you do now

- professor: come on guys, don’t hate on social sciences majors… it’s not their fault they were born this way

- so i was grading your tests last night. i wanted to kill someone.

- you have five minutes until the end of class to finish the test. but i want to go outside for a smoke, so three

- *section of lab report titled “applications of compound”* i heard that a drug cartel used it to dissolve bodies, should i list that?

- “i’m synthesizing this compound in my next lab class, what kind of stuff effects the success rate and yield?” “dunno man, it depends on your karma”

- based on my recent lab assignments, i have come to the conclusion that the professor wants me to get killed

- dude, Fehling’s solution contains glucose, what if it tastes like lemonade?   *proceeds to dip finger in and lick it*   well that was a disappointment. the potassium hydroxide makes it kinda bitter.

- professor: you’ll understand this concept in your fifth year   student: sir, this is a four-year program   professor: oh, then never

consider: teenagers aren’t apathetic about everything they’re just used to you shitting all over whatever they show excitement about

can someone please be proud of me like fuck I’m trying

This is critical information for any ASoUE blogs that follow me, I hate Lemony Snicket (the character not actual Daniel Handler) with a passion that rivals the burning of Wolf-Rayet star WR 102 and I will take every chance I get to shit on him. No I don’t take criticism. No I’m not sorry.

flan and natasha were all flan and natasha needed btw