Im Making A Playlist Of Sherlock Holmes Video Essays And Stuff On Youtube.

I’m making a playlist of Sherlock Holmes video essays and stuff on youtube.

Like any adaptations I just want sherlock videos lmao

I feel like there aren’t a lot of youtube retrospectives about sherlock

Ok no, listen to this

We all know about the whole 7% solution thing in the Holmes books, right? No one missed that. (BBC Sherlock fans, no this is not about Sherlock. This is Holmes.)

And he states that he only uses it as a stimulant when he is out of work. Ok. But you can’t just give up on addiction that fast, even if your name is Sherlock Holmes. So how did he do it?

I have a theory: the man was on crack half the time.

I love the Holmes books, I’ve read them all at least a dozen times. And you can’t tell me they don’t read like a tumblr post 75% of the time. Or like an interaction between Will and Jem from The Infernal Devices. I mean in modern language, they would go something like this:

A Scandal in Bohemia

Watson: How are you going to find the photograph?

Holmes: Idk, probably set the house on fire

The Red Headed-League

Holmes: Hey, Watson, got a gun?

Watson: Yeah, you asked me to.

Holmes: Good.

Watson: You don’t? What did you bring with you?

Holmes: A whip.

The Speckled Band

Watson: So… there’s a leopard

Holmes: Yes.

Watson: What do we do then?

Holmes: Pray to God and run.

The Cardboard Box

Susan Cushing: That box has severed ears in it!

Holmes: Yeah, but look at that salt though.

The Naval Treaty

Percy Phelps: This is a very important letter, I can’t lose it, there will be a war if it gets out, I got brain fever and almost died when it was stolen-

Holmes: Sorry, I couldn’t find it. 

Percy:…

Holmes: April Fools!!!

The Final Problem:

Moriarty: *threatens Holmes*

Moriarty: *follows him to Reichenbach to kill him*

Holmes: Cool, can I write a letter?

The Empty House

Holmes: I died… not really.

Holmes: Time to scare the shit out of Mrs. Hudson, I miss her.

Watson: I thought you were dead!

Holmes: It appears that the rumours of my death have been greatly exaggerated… by you.

The Priory School

Holmes: I sold my principles for 6000 pounds.

Watson: Whhaaatt??

Holmes: He’s just a rich white man, how much can it hurt?

Black Peter

Holmes: *enters with a harpoon*

Watson: Where the hell have you been roaming with that thing?

Holmes: I was trying to stab a pig.

Watson:…

Holmes: It’s not as easy as it sounds.

Charles Augustus Milverton

Watson: Okay, we’re supposed to steal this letter.

Holmes: Yup.

Watson: Except there’s this woman in front of the man we’re supposed to be stealing from, and she’s rambling about how he ruined her life.

Holmes: Yup.

Watson: Holmes, what do we do? Should we leave?

Holmes: No, let’s wait, I’m kinda curious how this is going to turn out.

.

.

.

Lestrade: Holmes, I need your help with this murder-

Holmes: Sounds like Watson did it.

Watson: 😶😶

The Second Stain

Lestrade: Look! The stain on the carpet doesn’t match the stain on the floor! Can you explain that, huh?

Holmes:…

Holmes: Bitch, someone rotated it.

The Bruce-Partington Plans

Holmes: Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Call 911!

Watson: Holmes? Everything all right? Did something bad happen? 

Holmes: No, nothing bad happened.

Watson: Then what-

Holmes: My brother is coming here.

Watson: But what-

Holmes: MY BROTHER IS COMING HERE

The Dying Detective

Holmes: I was dying.

Holmes: And now I’m not.

Watson:..

Watson: I feel like murdering you myself right now, not gonna lie.

The Devil’s Foot

Holmes: I think this is a deadly poison.

Holmes: Let’s both of us try it.

His Las Bow

Watson: I thought you retired.

Holmes: I did. But the level of jackassery here pulled me out of it.

Watson: Well, that’s true, there’s a war…

Holmes: I leave for 5 minutes and it all goes to shit.

Three Garridebs

Watson: Holmes, don’t hurt him!

Holmes: But he shot you!

Watson: Yeah, but-

Holmes: He shot you!

The Illustrious Client

Watson: Holmes, I heard you almost died! 

Holmes: Nah, I’m fine. What do you know about pottery?

Watson: What?

Holmes: Pottery, Watson. Specifically, Chinese Pottery. I want you to research on it.

The Blanched Soldier

Holmes: I want to write a story.

Holmes: And I don’t know how. 

Holmes: *writes the story*

Holmes: This is a pile of horseshit. I miss Watson.

I’d write about the long stories too, but my fingers are hurting now.

this is absolutely so real bc me too

fjskjfkd there is so much going on here

At first I was all “oh Holmes is into art as well as music!!” but then noticed the “of which he had the crudest ideas”

So Watson is just “he wouldn’t shut up about art but he doesn’t know SHIT”

Meanwhile I find it endearing to see an example of Holmes hyperfixating on something without being an expert on it. One of us one of us one of us—

I hate hate hate Holmes adaptations that make him invincible Need I remind you:

"His words were cut short by a sudden scream of “Help! Help! Murder!” With a thrill I recognised, I rushed madly from the room on to the landing. The cries, which had sunk down into a hoarse, inarticulate shouting, came from the room which we had first visited. I dashed in, and on into the dressing-room beyond. The two Cunninghams were bending over the prostrate figure of Sherlock Holmes, the younger clutching his throat with both hands, while the elder seemed to be twisting one of his wrists. In an instant the three of us had torn them away from him, and Holmes staggered to his feet, very pale and evidently greatly exhausted." (Reigate Squires) "With this permission I stole into the darkened room. The sufferer was wide awake, and I heard my name in a hoarse whisper. The blind was threequarters down, but one ray of sunlight slanted through and struck the bandaged head of the injured man. A crimson patch had soaked through the white linen compress. I sat beside him and bent my head. “All right, Watson. Don’t look so scared,” he muttered in a very weak voice. “It’s not as bad as it seems."" (Illustrious Client) "Holmes’s quiet day in the country had a singular termination, for he arrived at Baker Street late in the evening with a cut lip and a discoloured lump upon his forehead, besides a general air of dissipation which would have made his own person the f itting object of a Scotland Yard investigation. He was immensely tickled by his own adventures, and laughed heartily as he recounted them." (Solitary Cyclist) "“My collection of M’s is a fine one,” said he. “Moriarty himself is enough to make any letter illustrious, and here is Morgan the poisoner, and Merridew of abominable memory, and Mathews, who knocked out my left canine in the waitingroom at Charing Cross, and, finally, here is our friend of to-night.”" (Empty House) "Well, he has rather more viciousness than I gave him credit for, has Master Joseph. He flew at me with his knife, and I had to grasp him twice, and got a cut over the knuckles, before I had the upper hand of him. He looked murder out of the only eye he could see with when we had finished, but he listened to reason and gave up the papers. Having got them I let my man go, but I wired full particulars to Forbes this morning. If he is quick enough to catch his bird, well and good. But if, as I shrewdly suspect, he finds the nest empty before he gets there, why, all the better for the government. I fancy that Lord Holdhurst for one, and Mr. Percy Phelps for another, would very much rather that the affair never got as far as a police-court" (Naval Treaty) ".... Of course I knew better, but I could prove nothing. I took a cab after that and reached my brother’s rooms in Pall Mall, where I spent the day. Now I have come round to you, and on my way I was attacked by a rough with a bludgeon. I knocked him down, and the police have him in custody; but I can tell you with the most absolute confidence that no possible connection will ever be traced between the gentleman upon whose front teeth I have barked my knuckles and the retiring mathematical coach, who is, I dare say, working out problems upon a black-board ten miles away...." (Final Problem) Plus he fought the boxer McMurdo (prior to the events of the Sign of Four) so he must have gotten hit then too

OH MY GOD 😭😭😭

Can I talk about the end of Granada’s “The Six Napoleons” for a second?

Because I know in the canon something similar happened, but to see it on screen- Broke me.

So, after this whole case where Lestrade’s being Lestrade and excited about maybe getting the case right when Sherlock didn’t, and then Sherlock proves him wrong once again-

Lestrade acts like Lestrade does.

He’s so different than people like Athelney Jones or the others who mock and belittle Sherlock (even when proven wrong). Because he just handled that let down with so. Much. Grace.

He claps, as soon as Sherlock does the big dramatic reveal, rather enthusiastically.

And then-

And then.

He walks up to Sherlock. And says, “…everyone, from the oldest Inspector to the youngest Constable, would be proud to shake your hand.”

You can see Sherlock’s face in that scene- how the words hit him. John has often said that he is as “sensitive to flattery as a young girl is to her looks”, and that coincides with a sensitivity to kindness.

There are few people who have gotten to know Sherlock. Fewer still who treat him with kindness.

Lestrade has just handed Sherlock one of the highest compliments he could ever give the detective.

Without manipulation, malice, or ulterior motives.

Then, Lestrade walks away, leaving to conclude the business at the Yard with no idea of receiving anything in return. After all, he has just made a few jokes and sly comments towards Sherlock’s crime-solving skills. Even though he has just delivered genuinely felt accolades, he doesn’t expect anything from it. Who would, when giving such a thing?

But Sherlock rushes off to where Lestrade is just stepping out of the door, and holds out his hand.

He is offering what Lestrade told him would be the highest honor for anyone and everyone in the Yard.

…I’m not okay-

TLM Part 2