Loki Of Asgard - Tumblr Posts

frigga: what do we say when someone disagrees with us?

loki: that’s homophobic

frigga:

loki: someone take me out

mobius: like on a date?

loki: no, i meant—

mobius: *looks at them with hope*

loki: yeah, yeah, like on a date

loki: i would walk through fire for my family

loki: well, not FIRE because that’s dangerous but a super humid room

loki: but not TOO humid because my hair

loki: mother, there’s a monster under my bed and it’s really ugly

thor from the bottom bunk: i can hear you

loki: they died of natural causes

mobius: they were stabbed multiple times

loki: well it’s natural to die after that

loki: i accidentally indulged in too much ‘me time’

loki: turns out, i’ve been reported missing for 6 months and presumed dead by most locals and national authorities

loki: i swing both ways

loki: violently

loki: with a dagger

loki: come get some, motherfuckers

thor: help me, please

loki: i’ve got two words for you

thor: i bet they won’t be helpful

loki: your problem

thor: i was right

loki: you can trust me

thor: i don’t even trust the way you just said that i can trust you

thor: is it just me, or do all of your plans involve some horrible web of lies?

loki, lying: it’s just you

loki about mobius: this is crazy, but i’m having feelings again. like some kind of 14-year-old kid or something. you remember feelings, right?

thor: yes, i have them every day of my life

loki: you do?

thor: are you saying you don’t have feelings?

thor: we’re going to defeat them with the power of friendship!

loki: we’re not friends

valkyrie, holding her sword: we're going to defeat them with the power of incredible violence

loki: is it still murder if i give them a heads up?

mobius: that’s called a threat

loki: damn

loki: they hate me because i’m gay

loki: also because i have been murdering the locals but mostly because of the gay thing

loki: love is a weakness. it’s an evolutionary mistake

sylvie: you’re literally making a valentine’s day card for mobius right now

loki, pointing a glue gun at her: you’re on thin fucking ice

sylvie: why are you ignoring mobius?

loki: i’m playing hard to get

sylvie: why would you do that? you’re already hard to want

thor: you know, there are times when i think you don’t take me seriously

loki: really? there are times you think i do?

thor: hold on! i'm having one of those things... a headache with pictures

bruce: what?

loki: an idea. he’s having an idea

mobius: why do you always see the worst in people?

loki: because people are the worst

thor: guess what i’m about to get

loki: on my nerves