Hey Riri

hey riri <33

your new jisung fic, i can't even put it in words. of course it's so beautifully written like always,

but also i'm going through something similar too right now, and to find this beautiful fic exactly now was just so nice and comforting. So just u know, i can't really explain it, but this fic means a lot to me.💕🥹

hi anon <3 (✨)

I know how difficult is to go through all of this, but we can do it <3 Thank you for your beautiful words, they mean the world to me.

I am very insecure about myself, my future, my values.. It’s very hard for me these days and this blog is helping a lot.. you all are helping me so much. I’m so grateful. I’m not having a good time, mostly because of school and bullying, but I know it’ll be over as soon as I go to university (next september). But, you know, I’m stressing so much.

The situation at home is also fckd up. I can’t rest and I have strong anxiety problems. But I’m trying to improve.

Also, if I can count on you make sure to know you can count on me!! I’m always here if you need me and I’m happy that you found this comforting <3

I’m happy if you find my blog a safe place, it’s my most important goal 💞 I wish to be someone who you can count on, not just a normal stranger.

Even if you want to be friends, my messages are always open! Don’t be scared <3

Thank you again 🩷.

I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS OMG, one of the best ive ever read!!

ᯓ★ 𝐂𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭 ― 𝐇𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐠 𝐇𝐲𝐮𝐧𝐣𝐢𝐧

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖

𝙋𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜: idol!Hyunjin x fem!reader

𝙒𝙤𝙧𝙙𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩: 3,2k (got a little carried away lol) — 𝟮𝟮 𝙢𝙞𝙣 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙

𝙂𝙚𝙣𝙧𝙚: angst, comfort

𝙏𝙒/𝘾𝙒: hurt/comfort, reader's insecure and hyunjin is being oblivious most of the time

𝘼/𝙉: This is also a request. I normally don't really like reading angst but writing it is so much fun lol. Hope you'll enjoy this one!

⤷ 𝘏𝘺𝘶𝘯𝘫𝘪𝘯 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘺.

⋮ 𝗠𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖

You were heading to the studio with lunch for Hyunjin and the others. He didn’t reply to your texts all morning so you thought you’d surprise him and the others with lunch. You know how they can be when they are busy, so they probably appreciate it if you bring them something to eat.

You entered the building and down the hall to the studio they’d probably be at. Stopping in front of the door, you see it was not fully closed. Raising your hand to knock before entering, your hand comes to a halt when you hear your boyfriend’s voice.

You didn’t mean to eavesdrop, really. It was just that his voice was a little louder than usual, and you happened to stop by at the wrong time.

“Man, it’s so annoying. My phone keeps blowing up and she won’t leave me alone,” you could hear him let out a frustrating groan. “Sometimes she’s just… too clingy, you know? As if she can’t do anything by herself. ‘S driving me crazy.”

Murmurs followed your boyfriend's confession, but your heart was pounding so loud to hear their responses. Hyunjin said it so casually, but his words hit you like a punch to the gut.

Clingy? He thought you were being too clingy?

You thought you were just showing how much you cared for him — it hadn’t felt like too much. But now it felt like you overstayed your welcome like everything you did and every touch had been one too many.

Fighting back the sudden tightness in your chest, you swallowed hard. You stood by the door for a minute gathering your thoughts, before silently turning around to walk away. Your heart now aching with a newfound distance you weren’t sure how to close.

Apparently, your lingering by the door hadn’t gone unnoticed by one of the members. Felix saw something from the corner of his eye and before he could say something, he saw you turn around and walk away from the studio.

He frowned at the words of his friend and the thought of you possibly overhearing him. “She just cares about you,” Felix spoke up before getting out his phone to text you. He didn’t get a response from the older boy, at least not a verbal one.

You arrived back home when you heard your phone going off. Could it be Hyunjin? Did he text you a lie about how he was just busy and didn’t see your texts coming through?

You hated this. You hated this feeling of being lied to. If he thought it was too much, he should have just said so instead of going to his members behind your back.

Sure, he can vent to his friends. It’s not like you don’t do this with your girlfriends. But complaining about your partner and being actually hurtful? You wouldn’t do that.

You set down the bags that contained the lunch boxes before getting your phone out of your purse. It was Felix, asking if you just stopped by. He had seen you turn around and walk away instead of coming in.

You quickly typed a reply, saying you did want to stop by but forgot something at home. It wasn’t really a lie that he would believe, but at this point, you didn’t want to talk about it.

Your heart felt heavy and when you finally sat down on your couch, you felt the pressure behind your eyes building up.

Maybe you were overreacting? No, this was a valid reaction to something that felt so hurtful. This started a spiral of overthinking.

Were you really that clingy? And was it so bad that he might consider breaking up with you? He knew your last boyfriend said one of the reasons he broke up with you was because you were so overbearing towards him. But it was just because you love to show people you care about them.

In the beginning, Hyunjin assured you multiple times that you weren’t overbearing. He said he loved it when all your attention was on him and that you made him feel so loved and special with every little thing you did for him.

So what has changed?

You had hoped your afternoon would be filled with spending some time with your boyfriend, his friends and good food. Instead, it was filled with overthinking and tears.

In the days that followed you tried to act as if nothing was wrong. You tried to continue on, but his words echoed in your head and it made it impossible for you to be as relaxed as before.

Hyunjin could feel you were pulling back slowly, creating distance between the two of you.

The thing that stood out the most was how your frequent texting went from constant texting him things to a few texts a day to almost radio silence during the day.

Normally, you’d always ask him how his day was going, if he needed something to eat, if you could stop by to see what they were working on and even random things you’ve seen during the day that reminded you of him.

Now it felt like you only texted him out of necessity and not because you wanted to talk to your boyfriend.

The week continued, and it seems like the rift between you and Hyunjin has grown even wider. The tension kept knotting in your stomach and your hands kept fidgeting when you were alone together.

You were asleep, or pretended to be, when Hyunjin left for work and the dinners you had together were being eaten in an uncomfortable silence.

You cancelled a date night with the excuse of not feeling great and went straight to the bedroom. You didn’t come out for the rest of the night, leaving Hyunjin alone with his thoughts.

He felt like you were on edge, but he couldn’t figure out why or what had happened for you to be acting this way towards him. The sudden coldness and distance.

He had to admit, he missed your blabbing during dinner, or when you’re watching a movie and you tell him random fun facts about it. He just could not dwell long on your behaviour, because work still demanded a lot of his time and energy.

This resulted in the members deciding to go out to dinner together when they finished the last remaining details for the comeback. Felix suggested asking you along too; he got the feeling from his friend that something was going on between you.

Hyunjin hasn't talked much about you and what you guys have been up to lately, but he hasn't seen you in the studio during lunch lately either. You would normally come to surprise your boyfriend and the members while they were working hard on their comeback.

This also raised suspicions that you might have overheard Hyunjin's harsh words.

That brings you to here right now, at a table in a fancy restaurant, sitting next to Felix and Hyunjin. Your hands started fidgeting again, a habit you picked up the past few days.

Hyunjin sitting next to you, oblivious to your fidgeting, laughing and chatting with his friends - like hadn’t shattered your confidence with one careless comment.

“Hey, are you alright?” Felix’s voice was soft as he leaned closer, his concern clear. You gave him a small, forced smile.

“Yeah, just tired,” you mumbled. The lie felt heavy, but the ache in your chest felt even heavier.

Hyunjin’s laughter pulled your attention back to him. He looked so carefree and completely unaware of the hurt he’d caused. That’s what stung the most—how easy it was for him to say something that lingered with you, while he didn’t seem bothered at all.

Did he really not notice? Or does he not care enough to do something about it. Then again, you didn’t know if you should bring it up to him.

Felix spoke up again, “I haven’t seen you at our studio during lunchtime lately. What’s up with that?”

His attention was fully on you, trying to figure out what was going on in that head of yours. The question seems to caught you off guard. He observed you telling a forced lie to him about your absence. Suspicion confirmed.

Your eyes strayed quickly to Hyunjin but it seemed you didn't want to focus your attention on your boyfriend. His attention went to your hands, which were still fidgeting. He knew now that you indeed heard your boyfriend tell his members that he thought you were clingy and it was eating away at you.

This needs to be resolved quickly, he thought, but he didn’t want to intervene right now. It seems like you need a friend in this moment and he wanted to help you not have the troubling thoughts in your head for a moment.

He switched up the conversation with a different question to ease your mind, and you seemed to be eager to change the topic.

And this did work for a while, you were having good food and good conversations with the rest of the group. Except for Hyunijn, and it didn’t go unnoticed by him.

After the dinner ended, and everyone went their separate ways home, you fell back into an uncomfortable silence again. The car ride home seemed to last hours when it was in fact only a 20-minute drive.

Hyunjin tried to place his hand on your leg, but you just slightly turned your body the other way and faced the window the entire ride home.

When you stepped foot into your apartment, you immediately headed to your bedroom to change into your pyjamas. Hyunjin still was a little confused and watched you disappear into the bedroom.

Deciding to confront you about the distance he felt, he went after you. You were already in the bathroom, removing your make-up.

“Hey,” Hyunjin’s voice was cautious, a little hesitant. “Is something wrong?”

You didn’t answer him straight away. Your eyes found his and you looked at him through the mirror, before settling back to your own reflection to continue removing your make-up.

Should you admit that you’d heard everything? The hurt twisted inside you, mingling with the fear of pushing him away even more.

Finally, you turned to face him, your voice barely audible. “Do you really think I’m clingy?”

The question clearly caught him off guard, he just stood there and blinked at you. It seemed like he wanted to say something, but the words didn’t leave his lips.

The silence followed by your question was suffocating and it made you second — no, triple—guess all the thoughts and emotions you’ve felt for the past days. The reaction he gave you made your mind wonder if you might be overreacting to five simple words.

‘Sometimes she’s just too clingy’.

You felt so vulnerable, but you couldn’t hide your unspoken thoughts anymore. Your eyes stayed focused on Hyunjin. He swallowed thickly before parting his lips to speak. “You’ve heard?”

He had no idea you were at the studio, or near the studio when he was venting to his members.

A sad and tired sigh left your lips and you turned your attention back to your reflection, continuing your skincare. It felt weird, acting as if it was just a normal question, meanwhile the words chipped away at your confidence.

“It’s just... sometimes...” His voice finally broke the tension, but it didn’t sound as sure as you’d hoped. Running a hand through his hair, frustration flickering across his features.

You could see him trying to find the right words, but every second he hesitated only making your chest tighten more.

“What? Sometimes what?” you pressed on. “I’m sometimes too much? Am I too close all the time? Overbearing? I can’t do anything by myself?” Though your voice was quieter now, he could hear the hurt and uncertainty bleeding through.

He winced slightly at your words and pressed his lips together. He let out another sigh, “No, it’s not like that. I- I didn’t mean it like that. It’s just…” He trailed off, trying to find the right words.

You didn’t respond to his words, just waiting for an explanation as to why he said you were ‘too clingy’ and ‘couldn’t do anything by yourself’. But the explanation never seemed to come, the words stuck in his throat.

Though, you weren’t sure what you wanted to hear. His silence felt louder than any explanation he could have given.

“I was venting, and I just… I didn’t know you heard that... I’m sorry.” Frustration was seeping into his features. “It doesn’t mean I don’t care about you or- or what you do!” His voice softened and his eyes searched yours.

He didn’t know whether to take a step towards you and reach out or keep his distance, though the latter option is something you already succeeded in the past few days.

It didn’t feel good enough for you. The words fell flat between you, without meaning. You felt your chest tighten again and the suffocating feeling in your throat came back. The burning sensation of fresh tears behind your eyes was building up, ready to be released down your cheeks.

Turning away from him and nodded, “I get it, Hyunjin.” The man winced at the sound of your voice and hearing his name coming from your lips. “It’s fine. My ex said the same things, I’m used to it by now.”

It wasn’t fine. You weren’t used to it, not by a long shot. But you didn’t know if you could handle hearing more, or even if you wanted to.

Pushing past him, you went back into your bedroom. Turning on the lamp on your bedside table, you pulled back the covers and got into bed. Hyunjin lingered in the bathroom, trying to gather his thoughts on how he could explain to you he didn’t mean it like that.

He didn’t mean to hurt you, it was just in the heat of the moment and being stressed out because of work didn’t help either. Not that it should be an excuse.

You reminded him of the words your ex had said to you tugging at his heartstrings. That hurt. He knew it was a bad and rough break-up for you.

Even though it was so significantly small for him, something said in passing when he was stressed, holds an entirely different meaning and feeling for you.

You lay in bed staring at the window, silently letting the salty tears run down your face, and onto your pillowcase. From your position in bed, you reached out to turn off your light. The darkness engulfed you.

Hyunjin came into the bedroom after a minute. You felt the bed dip behind you, and he softly reached out to you. He rested his hand on your shoulder, trying to be comforting to you.

He could hear your breathing, uneven and heavy. Without seeing your face, he knew tears were rolling down.

The moonlight is peeking through the see-through curtains in front of the window., and it lit up your face. Right now, that was the only light in the room. You stayed quiet, not trusting your voice to say anything to your boyfriend.

“It’s not fine,” he murmured, almost like he was talking more to himself than to you. “I didn’t mean to make you feel like that.” When he didn’t hear anything from you, he continued.

“I just…” He exhaled slowly, clearly struggling. “I didn’t know how to explain it. Sometimes, when I’m stressed or overwhelmed, I don’t know how to handle things. But it’s not about you. It’s never about you.”

His words hovered between you. The sting of what you’d overheard lingered, reminding you of how easy it was for him to call you clingy in front of the others.

You wondered if he even realized how much that had hurt, or if he was just trying to smooth things over now that he knew you’d overheard.

“Then why say it at all?” you whispered, barely able to keep your voice steady. “If it wasn’t about me, why say it like that? Why make me feel like… like I’m too much?”

Hyunjin looked pained, his eyes flickering with regret as he gently pulled you to him in the dark. “You’re not too much. You never are.” At his words, you turned to face him.

Carefully he reaches for your hair to brush the loose strands from your face. “I know it's not an excuse to say I was stressed, but I really didn't mean it. The past few days I felt the distance between us and it ate away at me. I didn't know what was going on and what I had done to make you distance yourself from me.”

Your silence urges him to continue, “I didn't know how to bring this up, but I understand why you've been so distant these past few days. I was just venting to my friends without realizing this could hurt you. Especially after your break-up with your ex, I'm so sorry...”

His fingertips traced the side of your face before wiping away the tears that ran free. You swallowed hard, you wanted to believe him. You really did, because it is normal for people to vent about their feelings, good and bad.

But another part, the part that heard him so casually say you were clingy, kept you guarded.

Your hand reached out for his that was still lightly tracing your face, “I don’t want to feel like I’m smothering you, Hyunjin. I just… I don’t know what to do now.”

“You know, I missed your random texts. The one you always send if you see something that reminds you of me. And when you ask me how my day is going. The boys also have been asking about you, y’know.”

The sincerity in his voice made you look up at him. “They miss you at lunch too, just like I do.” For the first time since this conversation started, you saw the cracks in his usual confidence.

“It really hurt, the way you said it so casually too. And it felt like a punch in the gut after you know what my ex said to me. But it is my insecurity, not yours. I just need to figure out how to deal with it.”

He gently shook his head. “If you feel hurt about what I said, that is completely valid. I know it is an insecurity of yours, and I shouldn’t have been so casual about it.”

You let out a sigh and initiated intertwining your fingers with his. The small act brought a soft smile to his face. Watching your features, being lit up by the moonlight, he felt his racing heartbeat calm down.

“We’ll figure it out together baby. If I feel like I don’t need a distraction during work, I’ll put on my do-not-disturb mode on my phone, okay?” His words made you nod in agreement.

“And I will try to communicate my feelings more, especially when it comes to something like this. I realize now that I just have to talk about this when it bothers me.”

In response to your words, he nodded. “I love you, baby, so much.” Before you could respond he drew you closer, his lips brushing yours in a lingering kiss. “I love you too Jinnie.” You tugged him closer, kissing him with tender, quiet softness. You finally felt the tightness in your chest melt away.

He wanted to do better for you. His hand in yours felt like a promise—one he wasn’t going to let slip away.

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖

Ⓒ︎ 𝗶𝘁𝘀𝗮𝘀𝗶𝗹𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿. 𝘈𝘭𝘭 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦𝘥. 𝗗𝗼 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘳𝘦𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘰𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘺 𝘮𝘺 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘵.

fwb han jisung x reader

a/n: Han wants to stop being fwb and you think you are going to loose him, but it’s all a misunderstanding.

warnings: panic attack, angst but fluffy end

<><><><><><>

You were sprawled on your bed, phone resting loosely in your hand as you stared up at the ceiling. The past few months had been a whirlwind—countless late-night meetings, shared moments, and heated exchanges between you and Han Jisung.

Friends with benefits. That’s all it was supposed to be. It had started innocently enough—two friends, both single, both needing some kind of distraction. But somewhere along the way, it got complicated. You had your suspicions, but you kept brushing them aside. You didn’t want to think too much about the way your heart skipped a beat when he texted you, or the warmth that bloomed in your chest when he smiled at you during quiet moments.

You checked your phone again, expecting a message from him. He usually texted by now, either asking to come over or just making small talk, but today it was radio silence. Maybe he was busy with work, you reasoned, trying not to let your mind wander to darker places.

As you scrolled mindlessly through your notifications, the familiar chime of a new message broke the silence.

Your heart stuttered at those four words. Nothing good ever came from a conversation that started like that. Your fingers hesitated over the keyboard before you replied.

The dots indicating he was typing appeared, then disappeared. A minute passed, then two. Your stomach churned with unease, fingers tightening around your phone.

You stared at the words, the meaning sinking in like a weight dragging you down. You blinked, trying to process it, even as your mind went numb. Stop?

Your throat tightened, a wave of panic swelling in your chest. Did he mean he wanted to stop seeing you altogether? Did he regret everything? The nights spent laughing, the way he’d pull you closer, his fingers tracing patterns on your skin like you were something precious?

“Oh.” That was all you could manage, your fingers trembling too much to type more.

The dots appeared again, but the message took longer this time. He was thinking carefully, that much was clear, but all it did was fuel the anxiety now rising in your chest like a tidal wave.

You read that sentence again. And again. Your heart pounded in your ears. Different things? You thought you were on the same page. You thought the nights spent talking and laughing until the early hours of the morning meant something to him too. But apparently, you’d been wrong.

A bitter taste settled on your tongue as tears stung your eyes. You had been careful to guard your feelings, to not let yourself fall too hard, but somewhere along the way, you had. And now it was crashing down on you with all the force of rejection, suffocating and inescapable.

You sent the message quickly, afraid if you waited any longer, the tears would blur your vision too much to respond. You didn’t want him to see how much this hurt. You didn’t want him to know he’d broken you, even if it felt like he had.

Another message came through.

A humorless laugh escaped your lips as you stared at his words. Too late for that. You were already hurting more than you thought possible.

You pressed send before you could overthink it. You needed to get out of this conversation. Your head was spinning, chest tightening with the weight of everything unsaid. You wanted to cry, to scream, to curl up in a ball and pretend this wasn’t happening.

The dots appeared again, and you felt your heart clench. Please don’t say more, you thought. I can’t take more.

“it’s not your fault”

Your vision blurred, and you dropped your phone onto the bed, curling your knees up to your chest as the panic set in. He didn’t want you anymore. He was done. Maybe you were a distraction, maybe it had never meant as much to him as it did to you, but the end result was the same. You were losing him, and it hurt more than you’d ever imagined.

Your breathing quickened, each inhale sharp and ragged. The walls of your room seemed to close in, your chest tightening as if the very air around you was suffocating. You tried to take a deep breath, but it was shallow and shaky, your vision tunneling as the panic attack took hold.

You clutched at your chest, trying to ground yourself, but it was no use. Your head was spinning, thoughts racing too fast to catch. This can’t be happening. He’s gone. He doesn’t want you.

Somewhere in the back of your mind, your phone buzzed with another message, but you couldn’t bring yourself to look. Not now. Not when everything was falling apart.

---

Jisung paced back and forth in his apartment, his phone clenched tightly in his hand. He hadn’t expected things to go this way. This wasn’t what he wanted. He had thought—no, hoped—that she would understand, that she would let him explain. But he had fumbled it. The words had come out wrong, and now, it felt like he was losing her.

He ran a hand through his hair, frustration bubbling up inside him. This was exactly what he had wanted to avoid. He hadn’t wanted to hurt her, but the truth was, he couldn’t keep going like this. He’d fallen for her. Hard. What had started as something casual had turned into something so much more for him, but he was terrified of scaring her away. He thought ending things might be easier for both of them before his feelings complicated everything.

But her messages had been so cold. So distant.

He cursed under his breath, opening their chat again. His last message sat unread, and he frowned, his fingers hovering over the keyboard.

He sent the message quickly, hoping she would reply, but the minutes ticked by with no response. His stomach twisted with unease. Something wasn’t right.

Without thinking, he grabbed his keys and jacket, heading for the door. He had to see her. He had to fix this, before it was too late.

---

The knock at your door was distant, a faint sound that barely registered through the fog of your panic. Your breathing was still shallow, chest tight as if the weight of the world was pressing down on you. You were trembling, lost in your own head, when the knock came again—louder this time, more insistent.

“Y/N?”

That voice. Even through the haze, you recognized it. Jisung.

You wanted to ignore it, to stay curled up in your bed where you could pretend none of this was happening. But a small part of you, the part still aching for him, wanted to open that door.

“Y/N, I know you’re in there. Please.”

His voice was softer now, pleading. You could hear the worry in it, and something inside you cracked. You stood shakily, legs weak beneath you as you made your way to the door. With trembling hands, you unlocked it and pulled it open.

Jisung stood there, his eyes wide with concern the moment he saw you. He stepped inside without hesitation, gently taking your arm to guide you to the couch.

“Hey, hey,” he murmured, sitting beside you. “You’re okay. Breathe, okay? Just breathe with me.”

You shook your head, trying to catch your breath, but it felt impossible. Your chest was still too tight, each inhale sharp and shallow. He sat closer, his hands gently resting on your arms as he spoke softly.

“I’m here. Just focus on me, alright? Look at me.”

You forced your eyes up to meet his, and his expression was soft, full of worry and something else—something that made your heart ache even more.

“That’s it,” he said gently, guiding you through deep breaths. “You’re doing great. Just keep breathing.”

It took a while, but eventually, your breathing evened out, the panic slowly ebbing away. Your chest still felt heavy, but at least you weren’t suffocating anymore.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, voice barely audible.

Jisung frowned, shaking his head. “Don’t be. I should be the one apologizing.”

You looked away, your throat tight. “You don’t have to. I get it. You don’t want this anymore.”

He was silent for a moment, and you braced yourself for the inevitable confirmation, the final blow to your already broken heart.

But then he spoke.

“No,” he said softly. “That’s not it at all.”

You blinked, confused, and turned to look at him. His expression was serious, but there was a softness in his eyes that you hadn’t seen before.

“I never meant that I didn’t want you,” he continued. “It’s the opposite, actually.”

Your heart stuttered in your chest as his words sank in. He kept talking, his voice low and careful.

“I’ve been trying to figure out how to say this for a while, but I didn’t want to scare you off. I thought if I kept things casual, it would be easier for both of us. But the truth is, I fell for you, Y/N.”

You stared at him, speechless.

“I didn’t want to keep going like this, pretending I didn’t care, because I do,” he said, his voice cracking slightly. “I care about you so much.”

Tears welled up in your eyes again, but this time, they weren’t from panic or pain. They were from the overwhelming relief and hope that blossomed in your chest at his words.

“You… you love me?” you whispered, barely able to believe it.

Jisung nodded, his eyes never leaving yours. “Yeah, I do.”

For a moment, neither of you spoke, the weight of his confession settling between you. Then, before you could stop yourself, you surged forward, wrapping your arms around him in a tight embrace. He held you just as tightly, his face buried in your neck as you both breathed each other in.

“I love you too,” you whispered, your voice shaky but sure.

Jisung pulled back just enough to look at you, his eyes searching yours. Then, slowly, he leaned in, pressing his lips to yours in a kiss that was soft and full of all the things you hadn’t said before now.

It wasn’t rushed, or desperate like so many of your past encounters had been. This was different. This was love.

When you finally pulled away, he rested his forehead against yours, both of you breathing heavily but content.

“We’ll figure this out,” he whispered. “Together.”

You nodded, a small smile tugging at your lips. For the first time in what felt like forever, you believed him.

Together.

They Accidentally Bring Up an Insecurity| Chan

Gah finally trying to finish this set of fics!!

Bangchan x Gn!Reader

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The studio was a second home by now. The soft hum of equipment, the flickering lights of the soundboard, and the distant rumble of music playing through Chan’s headphones. You had been here countless times before, but tonight felt different- heavier. Chan’s sighs, the way his fingers tapped nervously on the keyboard, all of it told you that something was off.

You watched him from the couch, phone forgotten in your hands. He hadn’t said much since you arrived, and his silence was unsettling. You could imagine the look he had on his face. His brows furrowed, his lips pouting but also somehow in a straight line at the same time and also pursed.

Finally, after what felt like hours of him brooding in front of the screen, hands hovering without touching a single key, you spoke up. “Chris, is everything okay?”

He didn’t turn to look at you right away. His fingers twitched above the keyboard, hands still hovering just above the keys as if he was debating whether to say anything at all. A long sigh escaped him before he slumped back in his chair, his eyes staring blankly at the monitor. “I don’t know,” he mumbled. “Just…feels like I’m not doing enough.”

The words hit you harder than they should have, but you kept your face neutral. You had heard Chan talk like this before, the weight of responsibility pressing down on him like a constant storm cloud. But tonight, it felt more personal, like his doubts were cutting into something deeper.

“You always work so hard, though,” you said softly, trying to find the right words to ease his worries. “Everyone sees it. The members, the fans, everyone.”

Chan let out a bitter laugh, shaking his head as he swiveled his chair to you. “That’s the thing. I don’t think I’m enough. I feel like I’m always faking it, just doing what I can to stay afloat. One day, people are going to see right through me. They're going to be disappointed.”

You frowned, your heart aching at how harsh he was being on himself. “That’s not true. You do more than enough. You-” But your words faltered as something shifted inside you, a familiar knot tightening in your chest. "You won't disappoint anyone Chris. You haven't and you won't."

Chan’s self-criticism, the way he doubted his worth, resonated too closely with the insecurities you kept buried. If someone like him-talented, hardworking, and loved by so many- could feel this way, then what did that say about you?

If Chan didn’t feel like he was enough, how could you ever feel like you were doing enough to support him?

You swallowed hard, trying to push the thought away. This was about Chan, not you. He needed reassurance right now. But the insecurity had already latched on, creeping into the back of your mind.

“I’m serious, Chan,” you continued, trying to keep your voice steady. “You’re amazing, and you’re doing more than anyone could ever ask of you.”

He sighed again, rubbing a hand over his face. “I wish I could believe that.”

You wanted to say more, to keep comforting him like you always did, but doubt tugged at you, making your chest feel tight. Maybe your words weren’t enough. Maybe you weren’t doing enough to show him how much you cared.

Chan stood abruptly, pulling off his headphones. “I need a break. Let’s get out of here.”

You blinked, surprised by the sudden shift, but nodded. “Yeah, sure. Where do you want to go?”

He shrugged, grabbing his jacket. “Anywhere but here.”

You stood and followed him out of the studio, but the knot in your stomach only tightened as you walked side by side through the darkened halls.

His doubts had stirred something in you, and now, you couldn’t shake the feeling that maybe you weren’t showing your love well enough. Maybe that was why he felt like this- like he wasn’t enough.

The night air was cool as you walked together, the city buzzing quietly around you. Chan hadn’t said much since you left the studio, and you didn’t push him. Sometimes, he needed space to sort through his thoughts, and you respected that.

But the silence only made your mind race.

You ended up at a small diner a few blocks away. It was nearly empty, the late hour ensuring you’d have some privacy. The bell above the door jingled as you entered, and Chan slid into a booth, his shoulders still tense, his eyes distant.

You sat across from him, fiddling with the edge of the menu but not really reading it. The weight of unspoken words hung between you both, heavier than ever. You swallowed the knot stuck in your throat.

“I don’t get it,” Chan muttered after a long pause, breaking the silence. He was staring at the table now, his fingers tracing absent patterns on the surface. “I should be happy. I should feel grateful for everything I have, but I just… don’t, sometimes. I feel like I don't deserve any of this.”

Your heart clenched at his words, the knot in your stomach tightening painfully. The doubt in his voice mirrored the doubt that had been growing in you since the studio. You bit your lip, trying to find something- anything -to say that would make him see his worth.

But then his next words hit you like a punch to the gut.

“Maybe I don’t deserve the love people give me,” he said quietly, almost to himself. “Maybe I’m not doing enough to earn it.”

Your breath caught in your throat, and suddenly, everything he’d said before fell into place. His doubts weren’t just about his work- they were about him. And the worst part was, those same doubts had already crept into your own heart.

Was that why he didn’t feel loved? Because you weren’t showing him enough?

You stayed silent for a moment too long, lost in your thoughts, and Chan looked up, frowning slightly. “You okay?” he asked, his tone softer now, more concerned.

You forced a smile, but it didn’t reach your eyes. “Yeah, I’m fine,” you lied, quickly glancing down at the menu. “Just…thinking.”

Chan studied you for a moment, his gaze lingering on your face, but thankfully, he didn’t push. He sighed, leaning back against the booth, rubbing the back of his neck. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m just tired, I guess.”

You nodded, though the heaviness in your chest made it hard to focus on his words. The conversation from earlier kept replaying in your mind, each sentence twisting the knife of insecurity a little deeper.

The waitress came by to take your orders, and you mumbled something about getting fries and a drink. Chan ordered without much thought, clearly still lost in his own world.

As you waited for the food, you found yourself staring out the window, watching cars pass by on the quiet street. Your thoughts were louder than the hum of the diner, the doubts louder than anything Chan could say to reassure you.

Maybe you weren’t enough. Maybe you hadn’t been showing him enough love, enough care, enough support. If Chan—someone who was adored by millions -felt like he didn’t deserve love, then what did that mean for you? What if you were part of the problem?

Chan was rambling on about something, but you barely registered his words. His voice faded into the background as your mind spiraled. How many times had you thought you were doing enough? How many times had you comforted him, thinking your words were making a difference? And yet, here he was, doubting everything, including whether he deserved to be loved.

You must have spaced out because suddenly, Chan was waving his hand in front of your face. “Hey, baby, everything good? You’re really out of it tonight.”

You blinked, forcing yourself to focus. “Sorry,” you mumbled. “I’m just…tired, I guess.”

Chan frowned, his eyes narrowing slightly. “You sure, love? You’ve been kind of quiet since the studio.”

You nodded quickly, trying to push away the insecurity gnawing at you. This wasn’t about you- it was about him. You needed to be strong, to be the one who could lift him up.

But before you could say anything, Chan leaned forward, his expression softening as he grabbed your hands. “You know you can talk to me, right?”

You swallowed hard, feeling the weight of your emotions pressing down on you, but you forced yourself to smile. “Yeah, I know. I’m just…processing.”

He didn’t seem convinced, but he let it go, turning his attention back to the table. The food arrived shortly after, and the conversation turned light again, though there was an undercurrent of something unspoken between you.

Hours had passed since you both left the studio. Chan’s apartment was usually a safe space, where the weight of the outside world faded into the background, but tonight, the air was thick with unspoken tension. You were both physically exhausted, but it felt like there was more lingering beneath the surface.

Chan sat beside you on the couch, his arm draped around your shoulders, fingers idly playing with the fabric of your shirt. The TV flickered in the dimly lit room, but neither of you was paying attention to whatever show was playing in the background. Your thoughts were miles away, circling back to the conversation in the studio and the strange, uncomfortable tightness that had settled in your chest since.

You had been silent for too long. Normally, the quiet between you and Chan was comforting, but tonight it felt suffocating. He had been distracted, the way his fingers twitched against your shoulder, but you could feel his concern. You could tell he was debating whether or not to ask you once more what was up. He knew something was off with you, even if he hadn’t yet figured it out.

But you couldn’t keep it in any longer. Your unshed tears burning your eyes like acid.

“Do you think I’m doing enough to show you that I love you?”

The question came out before you could stop yourself, your voice soft but weighed down by the emotions you’d been pushing down all night.

You felt Chan stiffen beside you, his arm freezing mid-motion as the weight of your words sank in. Slowly, he turned his head to look at you, brows furrowing as confusion flickered across his face.

“What?” His voice was quiet his thick accent laced with surprise, as if the thought had never even crossed his mind.

You bit your lip, heart racing, unsure if you should continue. But the knot in your chest was too tight now, too heavy to ignore.

“It’s just… earlier, in the studio, you said you don’t feel like you deserve love,” you began, your voice barely above a whisper. “And I started thinking… what if I’m not showing you enough? What if I’m not loving you the way you need me to?” You swallowed.

Chan blinked, his mouth opening slightly as if to say something, but no words came out at first. He stared at you for a long moment, his eyes wide with shock and something else- something softer, more worried. His arm tightened around you instinctively, pulling you closer, as though trying to shield you from your own thoughts.

“Where is this coming from?” he finally asked, his voice gentle but filled with concern. “Why would you even think that?”

You lowered your gaze, unable to meet his eyes. “Because you feel like you’re not enough,” you admitted quietly. “And if someone like you-who works so hard, who gives so much- feels that way, then maybe I’m not doing enough to help you see how much you mean to me. Maybe that’s why you feel like you don’t deserve love.”

For a moment, the room was silent except for the soft hum of the TV in the background. Chan’s expression shifted from confusion to realization, the weight of your words settling over him like a heavy blanket. He shifted his body to face you fully now, one hand reaching out to gently cup your cheek, forcing you to meet his gaze.

“That’s not-” He stopped himself, his brows knitting together as if he was searching for the right words, his thumb brushing over your cheek in a soothing motion. “That’s not why I feel that way. It’s not because of you. Please don’t ever think that.”

You swallowed, your chest tightening even more. “But Chan, if you’re still doubting yourself, if you still feel like you’re not enough, then how can I not wonder if it’s something I’m not doing? If it’s something I’m not saying?” You pressed your palm to your eye as to not let the tears fall.

His thumb stilled against your skin, and for a moment, Chan just stared at you, a deep frown pulling at his lips. He looked pained, like the idea of you doubting your love for him was something he couldn’t quite comprehend nor deal with.“ No, no…” he whispered, his voice cracking slightly. “It’s not like that. Not at all baby. Not at all.”

“Then why?” you asked, your voice trembling with the weight of the question. “Why do you feel like you don’t deserve love? I love you...”

Chan exhaled deeply, his hand slipping from your cheek to rest in his lap, his eyes dropping as he wrestled with his thoughts. For the first time since the conversation began, he looked vulnerable- completely stripped of the confident persona he so often carried around you. “I don’t know,” he muttered, his voice barely audible. “I’ve felt like this for a long time. Even before you.”

He paused, glancing up at you briefly before looking away again, as if it hurt him to admit this. “Sometimes it feels like no matter how hard I work, no matter how much I give, it’s never enough. I think it’s more about me being stuck in my own head. It’s not about you. You’ve been more than enough for me. You've eased a lot of my insecurities love. I promise. I swear.”

“But how can you say that when you still feel like this?” you asked, your voice rising with frustration. You hadn’t meant to sound upset, but the insecurity you had been burying for hours was clawing its way to the surface, pushing you to confront the painful thoughts you hadn’t wanted to voice. “How can I believe that when you still doubt your worth?” Your lips were trembling.

Chan’s eyes widened slightly at the intensity of your words, but he didn’t flinch away. Instead, he sat up straighter, leaning closer to you, his expression softening in a way that made your heart ache.

“You’ve always shown me love,” he said quietly, his eyes locking with yours. “More than I ever thought I’d deserve.”

His words made your chest tighten in an entirely different way now, a mixture of relief and lingering doubt swirling in your heart.

“But I don’t know if I’m doing enough,” you admitted, your voice barely a whisper. “I don’t know if I’m showing you the love you need. Why can't I fix your doubts...” You looked at him sadly. "Why can't my love fix that?"

Chan’s gaze softened further, and he reached for your hand, his fingers lacing with yours. “You don’t need to worry about that,” he said, his voice low but firm. “You show me love every day, in more ways than you realize. The little things, like how you’re always there for me, how you listen when I’m having a hard time, how you never let me feel like I’m alone.”

You blinked, feeling the sting of tears behind your eyes as his words washed over you.

Chan squeezed your hand gently, his eyes filled with sincerity. “You don’t have to fix everything for me,” he said softly. “Just being here with me, just caring- that’s enough. More than enough.”

You looked down at your joined hands, the warmth of his touch grounding you in a way that made it hard to hold onto the doubt. “But what if it’s not?” you asked, your voice trembling. “What if you still feel like this tomorrow? Or the next day? What if I can never make it better?”

Chan’s expression softened even more, and he reached up with his free hand to gently lift your chin, forcing you to meet his gaze. “I don’t expect you to make everything better,” he said quietly. “You’re not responsible for fixing me, and I don’t want you to think that. I’m working on it, I promise. And one day I won't think about those things anymore. But you-” He paused, his thumb brushing over your cheek once more. “You’re more than enough. You’ve always been.”

His words hung in the air between you, and for the first time that night, the knot in your chest began to loosen, the weight of your insecurities lifting slightly. You could still feel them there, lingering at the edges of your thoughts, but Chan’s presence- his warmth, his reassurance -made them feel more manageable. Less suffocating.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, feeling a tear slip down your cheek. “I didn’t mean to doubt you…or myself.”

Chan pulled you into his arms then, wrapping you up in his warmth, his chin resting gently on top of your head. “You don’t need to apologize,” he murmured against your hair. “I’m sorry that I made you feel like that, baby. I never want you to think you’re not enough for me. You’ve given me more than I could ever ask for.”

You closed your eyes, letting the comfort of his embrace wash over you. His heartbeat was steady against your ear, grounding you in the moment, reminding you that you were here, together. That you didn’t have to carry the weight of your insecurities alone.

The doubts might still be there, but with Chan by your side, they didn’t seem so overwhelming anymore.

“Thank you,” you whispered, your voice muffled against his chest.

Chan pressed a soft kiss to your forehead, his lips lingering there for a moment. “I love you,” he whispered back, his voice filled with quiet sincerity.

And for the first time that night, those doubts were finally quiet.

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LEE KNOW X READER

a/n: thank you so much for your request <3 hope you like it @bodybahng

Argument

The silence in the room felt suffocating.

You sat on the edge of the couch, hands clenched tightly together in your lap. The ticking of the clock on the wall seemed louder than ever, each tick reminding you of the words you wished you could take back. Your heart pounded as you replayed the scene in your mind—Minho’s face, the hurt flashing briefly in his eyes before he masked it with that familiar cool distance.

He hadn’t said anything when you snapped at him earlier, and that silence felt worse than any argument. He had offered to make you tea, to take care of you, and you… you had pushed him away.

Your words echoed in your mind: “I just need you to stop!”

Minho had always been reserved when it came to expressing his emotions. While his actions were caring, he rarely let on how deeply he felt things. But you knew him well enough to recognize the subtle shift in his demeanor after your outburst—the way his shoulders tensed, the way he avoided your gaze as he quietly excused himself from the room.

And now, he hadn’t come back. The minutes dragged on, turning into an hour, and the more time that passed, the worse the guilt gnawed at you.

You stood up, pacing the living room, hands running through your hair as your mind spiraled. What if he was angry? What if you had gone too far?

No matter how much you reassured yourself that Minho wouldn’t hold a grudge, the silence that hung between you both felt like a chasm you couldn’t bridge. You bit your lip, anxiety gnawing at you as you considered going to him, but the thought of seeing that distant look in his eyes again made your chest tighten.

He’s upset, you thought bitterly. And I did that.

Taking a deep breath, you walked toward the hallway, feeling like your legs might give out at any moment. Minho was in the bedroom, you knew that much. You could hear the faint rustling of him moving around inside, though it wasn’t enough to tell you what he was doing. Part of you wondered if he was busying himself with something just to avoid talking to you.

You hovered outside the door, heart pounding. You couldn’t put this off any longer. You had to talk to him.

Finally, you knocked softly, waiting for any sign that he wanted you to come in. There was a pause before you heard his voice, low and unreadable.

“Yeah?”

You pushed the door open slowly and found him sitting on the bed, his back toward you. His posture was relaxed, but you could tell it was forced—the way his shoulders were slightly slumped, the way his head was tilted down as if he were focusing too hard on nothing in particular.

“Minho?” you said quietly, stepping inside. He didn’t look up. You hesitated, nerves prickling under your skin as you shifted your weight from one foot to the other. “Can we talk?”

He didn’t respond right away. For a moment, you thought he was going to brush you off, pretend like nothing had happened, but then he sighed softly. “I figured you’d want to.”

The heaviness in his tone made your heart ache. He still wasn’t looking at you, and that hurt more than you expected. Normally, Minho was so attentive, so in tune with everything around him—but right now, he seemed… distant. Withdrawn.

You swallowed hard and walked closer, standing in front of him now. He still wouldn’t meet your eyes, and it made your chest tighten with guilt. “I’m sorry,” you blurted out, unable to bear the silence any longer. “I didn’t mean to snap at you earlier. I just—”

“You didn’t mean to?” Minho interrupted, his voice calm but edged with something sharp. His eyes finally flickered up to meet yours, and you saw the hurt there, the frustration that he’d been holding back. “Because it felt pretty intentional to me.”

The words hit you harder than you expected. Minho rarely spoke like this, rarely let his emotions show so openly, and hearing him admit that he was upset made your stomach twist. You opened your mouth to respond, but the words got caught in your throat.

“I was just trying to help,” Minho continued, his gaze steady now, though there was a flicker of vulnerability behind his eyes. “I thought maybe if I did something small, it would make things easier for you. But instead…” He shook his head, looking away again, his jaw clenched. “You pushed me away.”

Guilt washed over you, heavier than before. “I didn’t mean to push you away,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. “I was just… overwhelmed. Everything felt like too much, and I needed space, but I didn’t handle it right.”

Minho’s lips pressed into a thin line as he listened, but he didn’t say anything right away. The silence that followed felt thick with unspoken emotions, and for a moment, you thought he wasn’t going to respond at all. But then he let out a long breath, his shoulders slumping slightly as if releasing some of the tension.

“I get that you needed space,” he finally said, his voice quieter now. “But you didn’t have to snap at me like that. You know I’m not good with… this.” He gestured vaguely between the two of you, frustration flickering across his face. “I’m not good with feelings, okay? But I try. I try to be there for you.”

The vulnerability in his words hit you like a punch to the chest. Minho wasn’t someone who easily opened up, even to you, and hearing him admit that he was trying—really trying—made the guilt twist even deeper.

“I know,” you said, your voice thick with emotion. “I know you’re trying, and I didn’t mean to make you feel like you weren’t. I was just… I wasn’t thinking. I was caught up in my own head, and I didn’t consider how it would affect you.”

Minho was quiet for a moment, his eyes fixed on the floor as he processed your words. Finally, he nodded slowly, though the tension in his posture remained. “I just…” He paused, running a hand through his hair. “It felt like I was doing something wrong, you know? Like no matter what I did, it wasn’t going to help.”

Your heart clenched at his words. You hadn’t realized how much your reaction had affected him, how deeply it had made him doubt himself. Minho was always so steady, so sure of himself, but now, seeing this vulnerable side of him, you realized just how much he cared—how much effort he put into trying to be there for you, even when it wasn’t easy for him.

“I’m sorry,” you said again, your voice trembling slightly. “I didn’t mean to make you feel like that. You weren’t doing anything wrong, I promise. I was just… I was overwhelmed, and I took it out on you. That wasn’t fair.”

Minho finally looked up at you, his expression softening slightly as he studied your face. The anger and frustration had faded, replaced by something more fragile—something that made your heart ache.

After a long moment, he sighed and stood up, closing the distance between you. He hesitated for a second before gently taking your hands in his, his touch warm but tentative. “I just want to understand,” he said quietly, his eyes searching yours. “So I can be better for you.”

Your heart swelled at his words, the sincerity in his voice making your chest feel tight. You squeezed his hands gently, your throat constricting with emotion. “You already are,” you whispered, feeling the tears prickling at the corners of your eyes. “You’re more than enough, Minho. I just… I need to communicate better. I need to tell you when I’m feeling overwhelmed instead of bottling it up.”

He nodded slightly, his thumb brushing over the back of your hand. “We both do, I guess.”

You smiled faintly at his attempt to lighten the mood, but the weight of the conversation still hung between you. After a moment, Minho pulled you into a gentle hug, resting his chin on top of your head as he held you close.

The tension slowly melted away as you stood there in his arms, the warmth of his embrace grounding you. You breathed him in, his familiar scent calming the storm that had been raging inside you all day.

“I’m sorry too,” he murmured softly against your hair. “For not giving you the space you needed. I just… I didn’t want you to feel like you were alone.”

Tears stung your eyes at his words, and you buried your face against his chest, overwhelmed by how much you loved him—how much he cared, even when it wasn’t easy for him to show it. “I never feel alone when I’m with you,” you whispered, your voice thick with emotion.

Minho’s arms tightened around you, and you could feel the tension in his body ease as he let out a quiet sigh. “Good,” he said softly. “Because I’m not going anywhere.”

You smiled against his chest, feeling the warmth of his words settle deep in your heart. You stayed like that for a long time, wrapped in each other’s arms, the silence between you now filled with the quiet understanding that no matter how tough things got, you would always have each other.

And that was enough.