
Member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Author of "The Point of Magic", Teacher of 6th graders
272 posts
Afterlifeincorporated - Afterlife Inc. - Tumblr Blog
Noice
ps5 brain monday
if not stopped I may make a post on character dynamics in the Algebra the Easy Way series

“Are you the witch who turned eleven princes into swans?”
The old woman stared at the figure on the front step of her cottage and considered her options. It was the kind of question usually backed up by a mob with meaningful torches, and it was the kind of question she tried to avoid.
Coming from a single dusty, tired housewife, it should’ve held no terrors.
“You a cop?”
The housewife twisted the hem of her apron. “No,” she muttered. “I’m a swan.”
A raven croaked somewhere in the woods. Wind whispered in the autumn leaves.
Then: “I think I can guess,” the old woman said slowly. “Husband stole your swan skin and forced you to marry him?”
A nod.
“And you can’t turn back into a swan until you find your skin again.”
A nod.
“But I reckon he’s hidden it, or burned it, or keeps it locked up so you can’t touch it.”
A tiny, miserable nod.
“And then you hear that old Granny Rothbart who lives out in the woods is really a batty old witch whose father taught her how to turn princes into swans,” the old woman sighed. “And you think, ‘Hey, stuff the old skin, I can just turn into a swan again this way.’
“But even if that was true – which I haven’t said if it is or if it isn’t – I’d say that I can only do it to make people miserable. I’m an awful person. I can’t do it out of the goodness of my heart. I have no goodness. I can’t use magic to make you feel better. I only wish I could.”
Another pause. “If I was a witch,” she added.
The housewife chewed the inside of her cheek. Then she drew herself up and, for the first time, looked the old woman in the eyes.
“Can you do it to make my husband miserable?”
The old woman considered her options. Then she pulled the wand out from the umbrella stand by the door. It was long, and silver, and a tiny glass swan with open wings stood perched on the tip.
“I can work with that,” said the witch.
we call that Muddie Buddies

Puppy chow is Chex Mix cereal coated in a melted peanut butter & chocolate mixture, dusted with powdered sugar.

Aura for aura

A very specific and powerful Kryptonite: cheerfully dumb characters with one (1) intense skill that they don’t even realize is difficult and are therefore not prideful about. Bertie Wooster can flawlessly sight-read brand-new pieces for jazz piano while also sight-singing the lyrics, but only does it because he wants to listen to the song and he has to perform it in order to hear it. He finishes virtuosic prima vista performances with “I say, jolly clever lyric, that,” as if he’d been listening to it on the wireless. He just somehow drank an entire martini while simultaneously playing a ragtime piece by ear, and all he knows is that he is ready for a refill. He thinks his greatest talent is the ability to grow a mustache.

View on Twitter
These pictures are killing me





Twitter is sometimes worth keeping around because of posts like these
The Jane Austen retelling I want to read and lack the science skills to properly write: Persuasion retold in a somewhat scientifically-accurate sci-fi universe.
It takes place in a universe with near-light-speed travel. The government of Anne Elliot’s home planet is exploring/fighting a war over a planet roughly 3-ish light-years away and is sending the military to deal with the situation. Anne falls in love with Wentworth, a lieutenant on a spaceship. He proposes, but Anne is persuaded not to marry him, because even if she’s allowed on the ship with him, the time-dilation of near-light-speed travel would separate her from her family and her world by keeping her forever out of sync with their timeline.
Wentworth leaves for his tour of duty–only a year or two for him. For Anne, eight long years pass. When Wentworth comes back into her life, her regret over him has faded into an old ache. To him, the wound is still fresh, and he’s still angry about it. Anne is now older than him (giving him plenty of fodder for bitter remarks about how time has changed her), and has to watch in despair as he chases after younger women who are now closer to his age. And there’s all the tense interactions and painful longing of the original novel, with an added sci-fi gloss.
The fact that less time has passed for Wentworth might dilute some of the impact of that final letter’s declaration of love. But it provides pain in so many other ways, which is part of the point of Persuasion. So I think it could be a really interesting twist.
Lolol sometimes it’s so funny reading peoples posts about “Mormon” theology that is based on Exmo stories, tradition/culture but not doctrine, and like random statements by some church leader 200 years ago that was not put into doctrine/canonized, or that he was corrected/reprimanded on, and all of us look back on like “well that guy was racist/sexist. Anyways moving on…” like tbh it just makes me laugh. Like I know our theology is a bit different than mainstream Christianity but y’all don’t need to make it sound like we are out here truly believing half the stuff you say about us.
10 Non-traditional virtue names for your new baby boy:
1. Sinbad
i think if i were a scientist i would publish all my research and findings and whatnot in latin like it's 1641 just to annoy people
did hope fail to come with the dawn or am I just sick?



Glad everyone is getting so much joy from early Quaker names! Looking forward to seeing any future pets/children/bands/drag acts named after stuff on this list.
oooh. im love it.



Patterns are really fun I have decided. This pattern is reminiscent of something that might grow on Neptune. So I’m going to refer to it as Neptune Floral
me: oh man im starving but im not sure what i should make for dinner……
the spirit of a 12th century templar knight that died a horrific death due to torture that started haunting me after i found a sword in the middle of the woods: spaghetti once more, prithee?
me: henry you are brilliant. spaghetti it is
Here's the notes on the Medieval Fantasy Star Wars au! I'll add to this as I do more. If you're new here, this is the saga of me drawing Star Wars but like what if it was Fantasy?










where's that masterpost of quotes that have no right going as hard as they do. I'd like to submit "Protagonism is best left to teens and the insane"


by Alexander Pisarev