Totally How That Scene Went Right.

totally how that scene went right.

bonus:

"NORMAL" FOR YOU (JASON TODD)

notes/cw ~ GN!reader, fluff, minorish angst (idk to me it's minor), has been renamed, (also this is only my second time ever writing in second person, i'm still learning so plz cut me some slack)

It’s 4:36 in the morning when the soft thud of boots landing on the fire escape outside your apartment interrupts the sleep you were finally starting to slip into; and it’s 4:37 when the window in your bedroom is pried open by large gloved hands, followed by the maneuvering of a large figure through said window.

Even with increased agility from years of training, he still manages to knock over a couple of the trinkets occupying your windowsill; and even though you can feel how tired he is from feet away, he still picks each item up off the floor, examining the objects for cracks or breaks before placing them back in their rightful spots.

“I don’t know why you keep coming through that window.” Drowsiness drips from your voice, but you know it’s nothing compared to what he’s feeling. “I cleared off the one in the living room to avoid this exact situation.” 

“Coming in this way is just better.” 

“Yeah, maybe for you, but not for my stuff.” 

A breathy laugh escapes his lips, and he walks over to your side of the bed, placing his knee on the edge and his hands beside your head. His palms dig into the plush cotton of the pillows and blankets around you, and he hovers for a second, before dipping down and placing a soft kiss on your lips.

“I like when you’re the first thing I see after patrol.” 

You look up at him to see the sleazy smile you know is on his face, but all you can focus on is the exhaustion evident in his features. Bags under his eyes and deep-set lines that would disappear with a couple of nights of good sleep riddle his face, and your mouth turns downward in a frown as you think about how badly he needs a night off.

He notices the way you react to the effects of his nightly activities and immediately gauges what's on your mind. “I can't,” he says, pulling back from you, standing up and turning around, starting the process of removing his tactical gear.

You suck in a tense breath, the sudden change in atmosphere giving you whiplash.

You watch his back as he removes the multiple layers of protective clothing that keep him coming home to you.

“Can’t what?” It’s a dumb question that you both know the answer to and have always known the answer to. 

It’s a dumb question that you both know the answer to, but you ask anyway even though the answer remains the same and has remained the same since you found out about his ‘occupation.'

He lets out a sigh, moving towards the dresser and opening a drawer to find some pajamas. 

“I can’t take a night off.” He lets his head drop, hands gripping the knobs, “and I can’t give you the life that you want…the normal life that you deserve.” The words come out strained, like they’re paining him, and they’re definitely paining you. 

You refrain from saying anything, knowing that when he gets like this it’s better to give him some time to let his rationale come back instead of trying to sway his thoughts.

A beat of silence goes by, and he pulls out some clean clothes then disappears into the bathroom across the hallway, not before gently closing the bedroom door behind him, ever the considerate boyfriend, even in his self-loathing moments.

The back of your head hits the pillow behind you, and you exhale lightly. Eyes drooping and body feeling heavy, you pull the blanket up to your neck and try to let sleep takeover. 

A few minutes pass before the soft sound of hinges squeaking interrupts the silence around you, and Jason shuffles around the room, quietly locking the window and putting stuff away.

The bed dips and he climbs under the covers, sliding one arm under your head and the other over your hip. Even in a sleepy, semi-agitated state you readily accept his warmth as a safety net.

“I wouldn’t be with you if I didn’t want to be.”

You feel him sigh against the back of your head, pulling you as close to him as possible, “I know.”

“Do you really?” You say slowly, fighting sleep. “Because it often feels like you don’t.” 

No response.

“I don’t know what you think ‘normal’ is Jason, but if it doesn’t include you then I don’t want it.” 

“I’m sorry," He whispers tentatively.

And your heart aches knowing the amount of love you give him may never be enough to heal the deep wounds leftover from years of being made to feel like a burden.

“You don’t have to apologize, but you do need to stop questioning my decision-making skills.” Your body shifts in his arms so you’re face to face with him, “I could do a whole lot worse than you.”

He lets out a wry chuckle that hides some sadness in it, “yeah…you’re right.” 

You hum, satisfied with his lack of protest, and open your eyes long enough to see a content look on his face, before closing them once more.

For a few minutes you lay in silence wrapped in his arms, reveling in the comfort of each other's company.

But eventually you lose the battle to sleep, and your brain drifts off into a dream land. Everything in the world around you is temporarily gone while you explore the expanse of your subconscious, and a world where Jason takes a night off every once in a while.

“I love you.” He says quietly, barely audible.

And he knows you don’t hear it, so he’ll say it again in the morning; and every morning after that as long as you’re by his side.

i’m just a girl who loves a guy with a big red helmet and who died from a clown 🎀🎀🎀

i thought this would take me five minutes to make it took 20 minutes 😭

Take this Jason Todd for your travels ✈️

there's genuinely so much love in sharing food, like i'm so serious. imagine the foods you share with jason throughout your relationship. a bag of pretzels when stuck in standstill traffic, a milkshake in the booth of a diner followed by the sweetest whipped cream frosted kiss, a bag of fries in the middle of the night when nothings open but fast food places and you've both got the munchies. when you go out to restaurants you always share appetizers and taste eachothers entrées. (he'll go 50/50 on it if you ask, honestly he'd give you the whole plate if you really wanted it.) sharing a bucket of popcorn at the movies, and a stick of cotton candy at a carnival. it seems a little trivial right? sharing food. it does, but it's really not if you think about it. sacrificing some of your sustenance so the other can get a little taste, maybe even more than that and regardless of whether or not you know they like it? there's a potential risk factor, waste. a faste of food, time, money, etc. no one wants to risk wasting any of those things, that's why people say 'sharing is caring' because it doesn't really come natural to humans right? it goes against the grain of self preservation in a way. but sharing with you is more natural than anything jasons done in his entire life, he thinks. he'll share food with you, a bed with you, a home with you, and if you'd let him...even a life.

ro my dear i am cradling you in my arms while we share a plate of strawberries. i am cutting the little leaves off with a knife and pressing the berries into your waiting fingers. this is so good!!!!

just, thinking about jason coming from a background where getting his next meal was a concern. where food was precious and scarce and didn’t always taste good but he ate it anyway. now he’s older and he chooses to share his food with you, a precious resource that he sometimes still has trouble believing isn’t scarce anymore. he never wants you to know hunger the way he’s known it. so a handful of candy here, half a bowl of pasta there, it all adds up. makes him feel good to know that you’re eating well, that he’s helping you eat well. he likes knowing what you like because it’s more information to hoard away about you.

jason cooking for you. sharing the recipes he got from alfred or picked up on his travels. sharing pieces of his past with you in each bite. love and effort and time gone into everything he makes. getting you to teach him new recipes for foods you like, adding bits of you to the story of his life as told by his hands and the ingredients around him. jason sharing and making the most basic elements of life with you because he wants to build a life with you.

ro you’ve got me swooning over here.

hello hello

i have a need for jason posed as st sebastian pls 🙏🙏🙏 i love your art and you're the first person i thought of who could do this justice 😳😳😳

wow we are the same person. well my commissions are open if your needs are urgent! otherwise i will try and get a sketch out for you when time allows. thank you for the idea 💝