Youve Heard OfFake Dating. Now Get Ready For

You’ve heard of “Fake Dating.” Now get ready for

Fake Family

1. “This guy is being a creep and won’t leave me alone. Will you pretend to be my overprotective older brother for five minutes?”

2. “The nurse said only family was allowed back here, so I told her we were siblings. Just go along with it.”

3. “That person asked if I was your S/O. I’m sick of people not believing when I say we’re friends, so I said we were siblings.”

4. “I’m your bodyguard, but the event you’re going to does not allow bodyguards, so I’m now your sibling.”

5. “I was on a date, and the person made me uncomfortable, so I told them my parent was a cop. Only problem: My parents are dead, and you’re the only cop I know. Help?”

6. “We have a very elaborate story of how we’re related that we tell everyone when they meet us. No one has any idea that it isn’t true.” 

7. “I told someone we were siblings, but we look nothing alike, so you said I was adopted. Now they want to have dinner with my family… Are your parents good at lying?”

8. “We always joke that we’re siblings, but someone didn’t realize we were joking, so now we’re seeing how far we can carry this out.”

9. “Our organization is extremely covert, but your friends have caught me at your place a few times picking you up. I just found out that you’ve been telling them I’m your hysterical aunt who calls you every time she has a new heartbreak. Really? You couldn’t come up with a less embarrassing cover?” 

10. “Look, I love you, too, but if you keep telling people you’re my grandchild, I’m going to scream. I’m not that old, you know?”

My heart.

Ow.

The Jedi in Yoda’s vision of a world at peace say so much about who he is. 

I plan on extensively yelling about Yoda’s visions in the immortality arc in the future, but for now please consider this.

Okay, getting this quick remark out of the way: it’s Katooni (the little Tholothian girl) who guides Yoda there. Children are a symbol of innocence, and what’s interesting is that Yoda takes her hand without hesitation after seeing all of the Jedi dead (and specifically Mace, Petro and Ahsoka). Throughout this scene here Yoda is the one asking questions and Katooni is the one answering - she speaks slowly and patiently, almost as if she’s talking to a youngling. –> The embodiment of wisdom manifested to Yoda (in a vision meant to tempt him through his dearest wishes) is a child. Talk about humility. 

Now please pay attention to the Jedi in the background. 

Here, the three Jedi right in the center of the set are Mace, Ahsoka and Petro - the exact three Jedi Yoda just saw dead and cried over (boy, s6 is so much fun, isn’t it?). So a significant part of Yoda’s deepest dreams is seeing other Jedi safe. He knows how to let go - that’s what this whole scene is about - but he still very much yearns for his fellow Jedi’s safety and happiness. 

Onto the even sadder part: have you noticed what’s going on here? Younglings are playing around, and the older Jedi are all talking. Quinlan with Saesee Tiin, Tera Sinube with Gungi, Anakin with Aayla Secura, and Mace with Ahsoka. And not just talking, look at the gif above! Mace is openly laughing at whatever Ahsoka said.

And Ahsoka looks at him like this. (Again, this is right after Yoda’s vision of her dying, desperately asking how the Council could expel her.)

One of Yoda’s greatest hopes is seeing Ahsoka happy with her fellow Jedi, at ease with the embodiment of authority that is Mace. 

Yoda loves Mace - he’s the first person he reaches for in the vision of the devastated Temple - and he loves Ahsoka, and part of his greatest temptation? Is to see the rift between the lost child of the Order and its Head healed. 

Same thing with Quinlan - the known loose cannon - and Saesee - another Council member. And Tera Sinube is an elder Jedi, talking to a youngling. And Aayla is “just” a Knight, almost a random one, and Anakin is chatting with her.

This follows a pattern: the rogue and the conventional, the very old and the very young, the common and the extraordinary - each pair shows opposites enjoying each other’s company, differences embraced. 

(Anakin talking to Aayla instead of sticking to Obi-Wan’s side like he does in the real world is especially interesting - he’s part of the community here, not ostracizing himself like he tends to do. Again, for this to be part of Yoda’s great temptation says so much about how caring he is. He wants Anakin to belong, more than anything.)

And finally, we get this: 

(I couldn’t make this part into a gif because of technical reasons, so enjoy the beautiful family picture.)

Once again we find that central theme of healing and wholeness. This part is what convinces Yoda to briefly let go of his (well-founded) doubts and to embrace the vision. It’s his biggest, greatest, deepest desire. The one that could have made him abandon reality itself to stay in this idyllic dream. It’s his unbroken lineage, happy, in the light. 

Yoda just wanted them all to be a family. Obi-Wan clearly adores Dooku in this scene (check it out, his awestruck look is amazing), their body language is incredibly warm and open, and they are completely at ease with each other and delighted to be sharing stories. It just screams domestic life.

And that’s it, that’s all Yoda ever wanted. For the young and the old to be content together, a community bathed in light, the gardens filled with the sound of windchimes and the laughter of children. He just wanted to have his family alive and safe and smiling. 

. . .

Dammit, I love this frog grandpa so much *sobs*

One of the things I love about Mandalorian culture is that it basically involves loving who ever you want, raising as many kids as you want, wearing cool body armor and flying around on highly unreliable jetpacks, and trying to shoot a space wizard who can send bullets back at you which is peak herbo/himbo culture. But seriously you don't get in trouble for picking a laser sword that's the wrong color, being forced to never see your parents as a toddler because you could move blocks with your mind, or never allowed to have family or life outside the Jedi order. One of the things that the EU established is both how family oriented Mando culture and one of the reasons they dislike the Jedi is partially because they force a child to separate from their family.

Hi! If you don't mind me asking, is there somewhere I can read your fanfictions/au's? Thanks!

as of yet no not really, i started writhing but stopped due to depression and personal problems. but if you guys are really interested in my a.us please list them and ill wright a one shot with art to accompany them.

Writing Tip June 4th

A list of body language phrases.

I’ve included a very comprehensive list, organized by the type of body movement, hand and arm movements, facial expressions etc. In some cases, a phrase fits more than one heading, so it may appear twice. Possible emotions are given after each BL phrase unless the emotion is indicated within the phrase. (They are underlined for emphasis, not due to a hyperlink.)

Note: I’ve included a few body postures and body conditions as they are non-verbal testimony to the character’s physical condition.

Have fun and generate your own ideas.:-)

Eyes, Brows and Forehead

arched a sly brow:  sly, haughty

blinked owlishly:  just waking, focusing, needs glasses

brows bumped together in a scowl:  worried, disapproving, irritated

brows knitted in a frown: worried, disapproval, thoughtful

bug-eyed:  surprised, fear, horror

cocky wink and confident smile:  over confidence, arrogant, good humor, sexy humor

eyes burned with hatred: besides hatred this might suggest maniacal feelings

eyes flashed: fury, defiance, lust, promise, seduction

eyes rolled skyward: disbelief, distrust, humor

forehead puckered:  thoughtful, worried, irritation

frustration crinkled her eyes

gaze dipped to her décolletage: sexual interest, attraction, lust

gimlet-eyed/narrowed eyes: irritation, thoughtful, mean, angry

gleam of deviltry:  humor, conniving, cunning

kept eye contact but her gaze became glazed: pretending interest where there is none/bordom

narrowed to crinkled slits:  angry, distrust

nystagmic eyes missed nothing (constantly shifting eyes):  Shifty

pupils dilated:  interested, attraction to opposite sex, fear

raked her with freezing contempt

slammed his eyes shut:  stunned, furious, pain

squinted in a furtive manner:  fearful, sneaky

stared with cow eyes:  surprised, disbelief, hopeful, lovestruck

subtle wink:  sexy, humor/sharing a joke, sarcasm

unrelenting stare: distrust, demanding, high interest, unyielding

Place To Place, Stationary Or Posture

ambled away:  relaxed, lazy

barged ahead:  rude, hurried

battled his way through the melee:  desperate, anger, alarm

cruised into the diner:  easy-going, feeling dapper, confident

dawdled alongside the road:  lazy, deliberate delay for motives, unhurried, relaxed

dragged his blanket in the dirt:   sadness/depressed, weary

edged closer to him:  sneaky, seeking comfort, seeking protection, seeking an audience

he stood straighter and straightened his tie:  sudden interest, sexual attraction

held his crotch and danced a frantic jig: demonstrates physical condition – he has to pee

hips rolled and undulated:  sexy walk, exaggerating for sex appeal

hovered over them with malice/like a threatening storm: here it’s malice, but one may hover for many reasons.

hunched over to look shorter:  appear inconspicuous, ashamed of actions, ashamed of height

leaped into action feet hammering the marbled floor:  eager, fear, joyous

long-legged strides:  hurried, impatient

lumbered across:  heavy steps of a big man in a hurry

minced her way up to him: timid, sneaky, insecure, dainty or pretense at dainty

paced/prowled the halls:  worried, worried impatience, impatient, diligently seeking pivoted on his heel and took off:  mistaken and changes direction, following orders, hurried, abrupt change of mind, angry retreat

plodded down the road:  unhurried, burdened, reluctant

practiced sensual stroll:  sexy, showing off

rammed her bare foot into her jeans: angry, rushed

rocked back and forth on his heels: thoughtful, impatiently waiting

sagged against the wall:  exhausted, disappointment

sallied forth:  confident, determined

sashayed her cute little fanny:  confident, determined, angered and determined

shrank into the angry crowd:  fear, insecure, seeking to elude

sketched a brief bow and assumed a regal pose: confident, mocking, snooty, arrogant skidded to an abrupt halt: change of heart, fear, surprise, shock

skulked on the edges of the crowd: sneaky, ashamed, timid

slithered through the door:  sneaky, evil, bad intentions

stormed toward her, pulling up short when: anger with a sudden surprise

swaggered into the class room:  over confident, proud, arrogant, conceited

tall erect posture:  confidence, military bearing

toe tapped a staccato rhythm:  impatience, irritation

tottered/staggered unsteadily then keeled over:  drunk, drugged, aged, ill

waltzed across the floor:  happy, blissful, exuberant, conceited, arrogant

Head Movement

cocked his head:  curiosity, smart-alecky, wondering, thoughtful

cocked his head left and rolled his eyes to right corner of the ceiling:  introspection

droop of his head: depressed, downcast, hiding true feelings

nodded vigorously: eager

tilted her head to one side while listening:  extreme interest, possibly sexual interest

Mouth And Jaw

a lackluster smile:  feigning cheerfulness

cigarette hung immobile in mouth: shock, lazy, uncaring, relaxed casualness

clinched his jaw at the sight:  angered, worried, surprised

curled her lips with icy contempt

expelled her breath in a whose:  relief, disappointment

gagged at the smell: disgust, distaste

gapped mouth stare:  surprised, shock, disbelief

gritted his teeth:  anger, irritation, holding back opinion

inhaled a sharp breath:  surprise, shock, fear, horror

licked her lips:  nervous, sexual attraction

lips primed: affronted, upset, insulted

lips pursed for a juicy kiss

lips pursed like she’d been chewing a lemon rind: dislike, angry, irritated, sarcasm

lips screwed into: irritation, anger, grimace, scorn

lips set in a grim line: sorrow, worried, fear of the worst

pursed her lips:  perturbed, waiting for a kiss

scarfed down the last biscuit:  physical hunger, greed

slack-mouthed:  total shock, disbelief

slow and sexy smile:  attraction, seductive, coy

smacked his lips: anticipation

smile congealed then melted into horror

smile dangled on the corner of his lips: cocky, sexy

smirked and tossed her hair over her shoulder:  conceit, sarcasm, over confident

sneered and flicked lint off his suit: sarcasm, conceit

spewed water and spit: shock

stuck out her tongue: humor, sarcasm, teasing, childish

toothy smile:  eagerness, hopeful

wary smile surfaced on her lips

Nose

nose wrinkled in distaste/at the aroma

nostrils flared:  anger, sexual attraction

nose in the air:  snooty, haughty

Face in General

crimson with fury

handed it over shame-faced

jutted his chin: confident, anger, forceful

managed a deadpan expression:  expressionless

muscles in her face tightened:  unsmiling, concealing emotions, anger, worried

rested his chin in his palm and looked thoughtful

rubbed a hand over his dark stubble:  thoughtful, ashamed of his appearance

screwed up her face:  anger, smiling, ready to cry, could almost be any emotion

sneered and flicked lint off his suit: conceit, derision, scorn

Arm and Hand

a vicious yank

arm curled around her waist, tugging her next to him:  possessive, pride, protective

bit her lip and glanced away:  shy, ashamed, insecure

brandished his fist:  anger, threatening, ready to fight, confident, show of pride

clamped his fingers into tender flesh:  anger, protective, wants to inflict pain

clenched his dirty little fists: stubborn, angry

clapped her hands on her hips, arms crooked like sugar bowel handles:  anger, demanding, disbelief

constantly twirled her hair and tucked it behind her ear:  attracted to the opposite sex, shy crossed his arms over his chest: waiting, impatient, putting a barrier

crushed the paper in his fist:  anger, surrender, discard

dived into the food: hunger, eager, greedy

doffed his hat:  polite gesture, mocking, teasing

doodled on the phone pad and tapped the air with her foot:  bored, inattention, introspection

drummed her fingers on the desk:  impatient, frustrated, bored

fanned her heated face with her hands: physically hot, embarrassed, indicating attraction

fiddled with his keys: nervous, bored

firm, palm to palm hand shake:  confident, honest

flipped him the bird: sarcastic discard

forked his fingers through his hair for the third time:  disquiet/consternation, worry, thoughtful

handed it over shame-faced:  guilt, shame

held his crotch and danced a frantic jig:  physical need to relieve himself

limp hand shake:  lack of confidence, lack of enthusiasm

propped his elbow on his knee: relaxed, thoughtful

punched her pillow:  restless, can’t sleep, angry

rested his chin in his palm:  thoughful, worried

scratched his hairy belly and yawned:  indolent, bored, lazy, relaxed, just waking

shoulders lifted in a shrug:  doubtful, careless discard

slapped his face in front of God and country:  enraged, affronted/insulted

snapped a sharp salute:  respect, sarcastic gesture meaning the opposite of respect

snapped his fingers, expecting service:  arrogant, lack of respect, self-centered

sneered and flicked lint off his suit

spread her arms wide: welcoming,  joy, love

stabbed at the food: anger, hunger, determined

stood straighter and smoothed his tie:  sudden interest, possible sexual interest

stuffed his hands in his pockets: self-conscious, throwing up a barrier

sweaty handshake:  nervous, fearful

touched his arm several times while explaining:  sign of attraction, flattery, possessive

wide sweep of his arms:  welcoming, all inclusive gesture, horror

Sitting or Rising

collapsed in a stupor:  exhausted, drunk, drugged, disbelief

enthroned himself at the desk:  conceit, pronouncing or taking ownership

exploded out of the chair:  shock, eager, anger, supreme joy

roosted on the porch rail like a cock on a hen house roof:  claiming ownership, conceit, content

sat, squaring an ankle over one knee:  relaxed and open

slouched/wilted in a chair and paid languid attention to:  drowsy, lazy, depressed, disinterest, sad, totally relaxed, disrespectful

squirmed in his chair: ill at ease, nervous, needs the bathroom

Recline

flung himself into the bed: sad, depressed, exhausted, happy

prostrated himself: surrender, desperate, miserable, powerless, obsequious, fawning, flattering

punched her pillow:  can’t sleep, anger, frustrated

threw himself on the floor kicking and screaming: tantrum

Entire body and General

body stiffened at the remark:  offended, anger, alerted

body swayed to music:  dreamy, fond memories, enjoys the music

bounced in the car seat, pointing:  excitement, fear, eager

cowered behind his brother:  fear, shyness, coward, desperate

curled into a ball:  sorrow, fear, sleepy, defensive

heart galloping:  anxiety, joy, eager

held his crotch and danced a frantic jig

humped over his cane, each step shaking and careful: pain, aged

inhaled a deep breath and blew out slowly: buying time to find words/thoughtful, reconciled

quick and jerky like rusty cogs on a wheel:  unsure of actions, self-conscious, tense, edgy

rocked back and forth on his heels:  impatient, cocky, gleeful

manhandled the woman into a corner:  bully, anger

slumped shoulders: defeat, depressed, sad, surrender

stiff-backed:  priggish, haughty, affronted

stood straighter and straightened his tie:  sexual interest, wants to make an impression

stooped and bent: aged, arthritic, in pain

stretched extravagantly and yawned:  tired, bored, unconcerned

sweating uncontrollably: nervous, fear, guilt

tall erect posture:  confidence, military bearing

was panting now at:  afraid, exhausted, out of breath, sexual excitement

-Sharla Rae