Tips On How To Dodge Personal Questions In A Professional Setting:

Tips on how to dodge personal questions in a Professional Setting:

I know. I know. I said I will be on a break and I still stand by that but it was difficult to throw away the sudden surge of motivation so here I am.

I received a request to make a post on this long back so here is your girl serving it. Honestly I am not much of an expert at it either but I have some ways that work sometimes so here goes nothing.

1) Do not give in to the pressure.

Literally that's the starting point. Whenever someone asks us a personal question we feel obligated at some level to answer because of xyz reasons. That's why we first need to escape the pressure of answering.

2) Straightforwardly and Politely state I am not comfortable answering that.

The bulletproof method. No explanation needed.

3) If you are in a situation where the person is being really nosy and can't take a no for an answer. Try saying to them,"I don't understand how it's relevant to our topic of discussion."

4) If you are not in a position to decline at all which happens when the person asking the question is of higher authority and has influence in this situation give vague answers that lead nowhere.

Example: So are you dating anyone?

It's tough to say in particular you know the dating scene nowadays it's difficult to put a name on anything.

Or what do you do on your weekends?

Nothing just the usuals. I am an office worker after all.

This creates a sense of familiarity with the crowd but at the same time does not reveal anything in precision.

5) Turn the topic on them. One of the smartest things you can do is make them the central focus. People love to talk about themselves so it works most of the time until you come across someone truly smart.

Example: hey how's the new office? Are you liking it here?

Ans: Well I am still getting used to the environment here. What about you? How long have you been working here?

6) Another thing you can do is dance around the topic but not on the topic. You remember how you used to write a 1 mark question for 5 marks exactly like that. Tell the prequel and sequel of the question but never answer the exact question.

7) This one is kinda rude I won't suggest doing it around randomly but if you have been in the corporate space for sometime you would know that there are some people who like to ask things only to belittle you or spread gossip or to be mean. The jealous ones that don't have a life of their own.

In case they ask something or say something rude or cross a boundary just start singing a song or change the topic completely. Don't acknowledge anything they say and continue with your random talks or humming. Trust me it's the easiest way to get rid of them.

Still some are persistent and will try to get an answer. Simply say it's not worth discussing. It's boring.

8) Apart from that there are subtle things you can do which can create a persona that conveys you are not open towards personal questions. You can do it by simply detaching yourself whenever someone starts talking about their personal lives. Don't be a participant or a listener. It gives a que you are not looking to bond personally and many other similar things.

9) If you are truly in a toxic work culture where your colleagues seem to constantly bug and bully you to share personal stuff (happened with me in my previous workplace) Firmly state,"I come here to work not to make personal relations."

10) Ignore.

I hope it helps even a little there's not much we can do without offending the other person but we can be gentle and polite in our tone and gesture that's the only way.

That's all for today's show on ash-says. Stay tuned for more illegal tricks and explosive opinions.

A coworker was telling me about how she's 27 and doesn't feel ready to have kids yet but feels like she has to, and i told her some anecdotes about women who had kids and regretted it & realized they don't enjoy parenting and she said "oh yeah, postpartum depression is really terrible" and I said "no, not postpartum depression. These women just were unhappy as parents, forever." and she was like "uhhhhhhh..."

one of the biggest things I can advocate for (in academia, but also just in life) is to build credibility with yourself. It’s easy to fall into the habit of thinking of yourself as someone who does things last minute or who struggles to start tasks. people will tell you that you just need to build different habits, but I know for me at least the idea of ‘habit’ is sort of abstract and dehumanizing. Credibility is more like ‘I’ve done this before, so I know I can do it, and more importantly I trust myself to do it’. you set an assignment goal for the day and you meet it, and then you feel stronger setting one the next day. You establish a relationship with yourself that’s built on confidence and trust. That in turn starts to erode the barrier of insecurity and perfectionism and makes it easier to start and finish tasks. reframing the narrative as a process of building credibility makes it easier to celebrate each step and recognize how strong your relationship with yourself can become

workouts for when you don’t want to workout

40 minute yoga workout by lena snow: https://youtu.be/mSpUQMyXYoI?si=n5HB4UeAK2N2joJZ

20 minute slow full body workout by madfit: https://youtu.be/GB5uPT4W6p8?si=7OtK425XUASyOnBS

15 minute slow full body workout by madfit: https://youtu.be/M6m_t10WlfU?si=U_bi7zfbA9zugdUV

15 minute upper body by oppserve: https://youtu.be/3XRzNhPwstg?si=fgEflM6SBysNDaeo

10 minute anti-bloating cardio by blogilates: https://youtu.be/lQDrPsPodA0?si=YelVW1qHeY3Skmie

30 minute pilates for when you are sick by livaligned pilates: https://youtu.be/GZ-6qjHfH14?si=l-mwldr6FyQSAm9p

literally anything by growwithjo (her workouts are a major serotonin boost!)

Achieving my goals has been a walk through a park in spring for the longest time in my life because I aspire to be someone, not to do things. I set goals according to the kind of person I want to be and find the most natural way to go about it that's flexible enough to fit into the kind of lifestyle I live and the nature of my neurodivergence- instead of milestones that I know for a fact I will never hit because I do not have the kind of brain that can hold that train of thought for long enough for achievement.

Simply put, I focus on who I want to be, effortlessly.

I want to be the kind of person that wakes up at 4 am because that's when my focus is at its peak and daytime is too loud and too bright for me- so I make sure to be asleep by 2300 and have a day that requires vigorous use of my energy so when I hit my bed I just- pass out.

I want to be the kind of person that's always at maximum health so I shop for organic groceries and refuse to consume hyper processed foods or drinks. I learned to make nutrient dense meals at home and took a free online course on Alison on gut health and nutrition and found ingredients in my neighborhood to make meals that I like that appeal to my taste buds while being as healthy as I can get. I consume no alcohol or soda or processed sugars and drink as much water as I can. I take the stairs over the elevator and walk around town instead of taking a taxi and snack on fruits and refuse to have any unhealthy meal in my house if I can avoid it- and eat at home before I leave so the burgers don't tempt me. I learned to fast for the first 5 hours of my day and last 4. I'm easily basically a carnivore and walking around all day forces me to drink water.

I want to be a well dressed person so I only buy clothes that I know will look good on me. I get them tailored to my body and own no single dusty cloth that I know will ruin the self image I'm trying to build, even at home. I get my nails and hair done monthly and retouch my eyeliner tattoo every 6 months. My stud earrings and bracelet are basically permanent at this point I only take them out for cleaning I do not shop online and I'm willing to go thrifting every now and then to find hidden gems that won't cost me my entire net worth if I were to buy at full price. All my clothes are in my color seasons and undertones- even on my worst days I look scrumptious, I can't help it. I have no choice, it's my only option.

I want to be the kind of person that is focused- at least as focused as my brain can be so I give it no distractions. No social media no content consumption no highxlow music , we study at the library and take a walk at the park. We get the penthouse apartment because it's peaceful and we move a little deeper into the country so we are living by the woods. We prefer swimming over partying and do not engage in activities that require short length focus. We only watch long form content, if we do, and never marvel movies because the effects happen too fast and we don't like that- so we only watch slow paced movies. We only listen to white noise brown noise nature sounds and neverrr rap music, ever, so we don't even have Spotify. Ever. Or Netflix. Or Prime or whatever - we go to the cinema when we need to. Slow paced life. Offline hobbies. Off screen lifestyle. Don't even have a TV (appt came with one and i- sold eet hehe)

I want to be the kind of person that's always at peace with the people around me so I limit my interactions with them. I decide which issues are worth blowing up over and which I can let go. I learn the hierarchies of the tables I sit on and respect them, as they are. I know my place, and I stick to it, because I'm comfortable with it. I do not stick to one group of people or identify with it so clique altercations do not get to me, I do not judge or pick sides and I refuse to gossip, ever. I bring the value needed and I take the value I need and go.

I want to be the kind of person that is respected so I live in a way that demands it. I have no enemies and you will NOT catch me on some beef. I dress appropriately and learn the social etiquette of my social group. I bring value as needed, take part in my community and devote myself to my religion. I know my place, I gladly take responsibility for it and have boundaries that I do not relent on, ever. I watch myself around men, single and married, and more around their wives. I do not interact outside social politesse and say more nos that yesses, I don't let people into my house, ever, uninvited or unannounced and I do not go to theirs.

I want to be the kind of- you get the idea. I don't focus on what I NEED TO DO I focus on who I need to become, and strategize from there. Taking a walk is more natural than hitting the gym, isn't it. Having no Instagram is easier than * only spend 3 hours on Instagram*. If you have no ripped denim how will you wear ripped denim on the day you met the person that could give you opportunities? If you are not around talking to everyone how will you start fights and get locked in petty issues? If you have no soda in your house what are the chances of you drinking soda??? If you only make meals as healthy as you can what are the chances of falling sick? Having acne? Skin issues? Weak nails??

Effortlessly. Reaching your goals in the most natural way possible.

As I've kept saying- success is a question of systems, not milestones. It's not what you need to be it's who do you need to be. As naturally and effortlessly as possible, that how you go about it. Systems, so that success is a matter of natural obvious course.

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Hello 👋 how are you? I love your page and you feel like a comfort person. Thank you. I wanted to ask if you have some ideas regarding jobs and finance for those who don't have full time jobs. Do you have any recommendations for jobs that you can do online and earn passively? Thank you ♥

Hi love! Thank you so much. Glad to hear you enjoy my page and its content <3

Some contract/freelance jobs I would recommend to increase your (potential) passive income include:

Sell items online like Poshmark/Depop, eBay, etc.

Purchase & flip domains

Purchase/resell clothing, accessories, and other trending items

Rent out items or owned spaces (in your home, parking spaces, classes you've purchased from a membership, etc.)

Create a social channel (YouTube/TikTok) or blog with ads

Write an e-book/a course/self-published book

Affiliate marketing

Sell photo presets/templates/photography/art online

Investing in a high-yield savings account (/CD) or dividend stocks

Hope this helps xx