Ok Let's Try Something.

Ok let's try something.

Reblog with your favorite TSH lines!

Just, a quote, a piece of dialogue, a random specific passage- anything you'd like that you feel stuck with you!

I'll start- I have several, but the first that comes to mind is this one:

I looked at him. There was so much I wanted to ask him, so much I wanted to say; but somehow I knew there wasn't time and even if there was, that it was all, somehow, beside the point.

'Are you happy here?' I said at last.

He considered it for a moment. 'Not particularly,' he said. 'But you're not very happy where you are, either.'

Camilla isn’t a “not like other girls” character. She’s a lot more “like” other girls in some ways than one may think. RICHARD believes she is not. RICHARD believes that men inherently more intelligent, interesting, authentic and deep than women are, so he thinks that Camilla being an intelligent, interesting person who is engaged in intellectual pursuits as well as the inherent seclusion from her peers that comes with being in the Greek class MAKES her separate from other women. I think the fandom fails to consider that and makes Camilla out to be more gender non-conforming than she is. The “she was still a girl” paragraph is very telling and I think often overlooked because it doesn’t validate that narrative. Camilla is not a Donna Tartt expy. Camilla’s ending fate being complete solitude is a cosmic punishment because Camilla has lived her entire life finding strength in her connections to others. Her and Charles are twins but the role she plays in their dynamic is of the caretaker, and a part of his breakdown is caused by his loss of stability when they divide. She spends the last years of her grandmother’s life as her grandmother’s caretaker. She is not going to ever finish her degree or go on adventures or be a strong independent career woman. She’s going to wilt in solitude. The only reason she ever gives for refusing Richard’s marriage proposal isn’t that she doesn’t want to be tied down or that she wants to go and branch out and see the world, it’s that she doesn’t love him, she loves Henry. She would have said yes if it was Henry. She would have rather been Henry Winter’s wife than a classicist or scholar in her own right. This is not convenient for The Secret History’s fandom discourse and it is not very “feminist”, but it is true.

It's been said a lot of times before but I'll say it again because it's true: the country house section is one of the best, if not THE best section of the book.

It's weird to say considering how "useless" it is in terms of plot (there's the Bacchanal happening in the background but of course we know nothing about it yet), and there are many parts that are way more interesting in which actual things happen. Plus, it is quite long, so a lot of pages of basically nothing.

And yet in retrospect, that's the part that stuck with me the most in the end, and it still is one of the first things that come to mind when I think back on TSH.

It was just that vivid. Maybe it's because I've experienced something similar myself so I could sympathize with how Richard was feeling too. I just remember I was totally immersed in it the first time I read it. I really felt like I was there. And even if it did last longer than I expected and I wanted to go on with the story already, I didn't feel bored.

Apart from simply ✨the atmosphere✨ and ✨the aesthetic✨ being on point, I think the main reason for this is that it really fed the illusion, and it made you FEEL like Richard. We knew from the very first page (lines!) that this book was probably not going to be a joyful one. But while they were in that country house, everything seemed fine. Richard was finally making his way into the group, they were starting to be more open towards him, they were all having a great time together, we got to see their little stupid shenanigans which made us know all of them better and me inevitably attached to all of them (Bunny throwing Henry and Francis in the water will never not be funny to be) and they even started daydreaming about the possibility of living together in that house without anything changing in the future.

It was clear even while I was reading it that all those things would have never become true, and that the illusion would have shattered soon. But still a little part of me kept on believing that maybe that could last, because the way it was narrated by Richard was... weirdly hopeful, which isn't something I can say about any other part of the book I believe. It was hopeful, and yet there was that unsettling sense of dread creeping through the lines, because you KNEW the murder was coming soon and everything would end. But just like Richard, I just... didn't care in the moment.

The country house section to me was somehow a snippet into what could have been if they never murdered Bunny- or even before, if they never had the Bacchanal at all. Could things have gone wrong at some point still, for whatever other reason? Probably yes. Maybe they weren't meant to last anyways, maybe they weren't even friends in the first place, everyone has their own thoughts about this. But it's sweet to think about. Now knowing the whole story and how terrible the situation actually got makes those pages even more painful. Those really were their happiest times.

Also I could talk about Camilla cutting her foot too but that's maybe another post for another day before this becomes way too long lol.

Also also the cherry on top for me was definitely that last couple of lines which got to me HARD and make my heart ache still:

There was a ragged burst of laughter; faint, but clear, it floated back across the evening air. That laughter haunts me still.

“And if beauty is terror,” said Julian, “then what is desire? We think we have many desires, but in fact we have only one. What is it?”

“To live,” said Camilla.

“To live forever,” said Bunny, chin cupped in palm.

We have all spoken at length about how toxic and awful the Greek class is. So here are some sweet moments where they’re actually quite cute:

- Francis putting a blanket over Richard when he falls asleep on the couch

- Charles not ignoring animals in need: rescuing a dog about to be put down and then taking in a stray cat

- Camilla proceeding to be very good to said dog. Then both twins being devastated when it died.

- Bunny writing an “I’m sorry” note to Richard then putting it with a book and mints in his mail box

- Henry taking care of Richard after he almost freezes to death, literally being so gentle and good the whole time. (I get you could argue this was part of the psychotic master plan, but this sequence is still so soft)

- “Forgive me, for all the things I did, but mostly for the ones I did not.“

- The boys being genuinely worried about Camilla when she cut her foot and all freaking out and then helping her and talking so kindly to her

- Bunny getting described as generally very patient and nice to his chihuahua-like girlfriend and calling her “sweetie” and “honey” and wanting eight kids with her, four boys and four girls. (uh, this is before he went crazy)

- Charles and Richard musing about the Greek class all living at the farmhouse together

- Henry winking at Camilla when she did a good job reading

- Bunny genuinely being able to make Henry laugh, like by triple spacing his essay

- Distressed Richard asking Camilla to tell him a story, and her talking about the only memory of her father and how she and Charles, as babies, used to squabble over a tape measurer

- The twins hosting dinner at their apartment every Sunday even though they didn’t have much.

Everyone remembers where they were when reading 'the snow in the mountains was melting and Bunny had been dead for several weeks before we came to understand the gravity of our situation' for the first time.