Desperately In Need Of A Girlfriend? Well Let Me Tell You Something-

Desperately in need of a girlfriend? Well let me tell you something-

See this is why I was hesitant on putting it there I'll remove it lmao I practically already have one it's not like I want anyone else

I wouldn't do it myself but if someone would kill me I don't think I'd complain

Oh so you kin James Potter?

What's it like being a perpetual people pleaser? What's it like remembering everything about everyone else but sometimes wishing they remembered anything at all about you? Or how you pour too much of your own money or time into other people. How you wish you didn't. How you hate change but won't admit it and even though you seem like a leader you're more likely to be a follower. How does it feel to tell yourself you haven't had it bad enough to consider it trauma? How does it feel, to wish you had someone who reciprocated even an ounce of the affection you give to other people. How does it feel to fall in love with people more quickly than you can register? How does it feel to be an ambivert? To have some days where you can't shut up and others where you hate yourself for it. And tell me how it feels to have no greater desire than some sort of group or conformity to reside in? How does it feel to not know who you are when you aren't around other people? How does it feel to be acutely self-aware and more than logical but to still let your emotions get the best of you? How does it feel, to feel unwanted? How does it feel to blame yourself for things entirely out of your control? How does it feel to lay awake at night thinking about your parents and the stray cat in the alley and the man you saw looking awfully down in some passing moment on some sidewalk today? How does it feel to have used every prayer you ever thought you had on the burdens others carried? How does it feel to have been the little kid adults confided their issues in from an early age? How does it feel to give the best advice anyone could ask for but have no sense of direction in your own life? How does it feel to strike a match on yourself to keep others warm? You only seem to set things on fire that way . How does it feel to have an earth-sized hole in your chest? How does it feel to think with your heart not your head?

How does it feel to feel too much?

How does it feel to own things until they are just near broken because you never learned how to let go? How does it feel to be watering dead flowers? Why can't you let things die? You can't love things that don't want to be loved. You can't care enough for the whole word.

"Your favorite character is James Potter? That's so basic.."

Is it? Is it, because he's consistently looked over in this fandom. His woes and his struggled and his hurt is constantly over or forgotten in media and literature because nobody can stand an unhappy James potter. He's just some dumb guy who like regulus a little too much but to me he's so much more than that. He's sociable and insecure and anxious. He's afraid of being alone. He's afraid of everyone forgetting him some day. And so he's loud and abrasive and too much because he feels like he has to be. He feels as though the minute he stops talking everyone is going to go on with their lives and forget about James Potter. He's just a scared young boy who grew up before he wanted to. Always the therapist never the patient, always the owner never the dog. He was always caring for something and that made him kind of stoic. People like to say regulus never expressed emotions but I'd like to present to you James who didn't allow himself to express sadness. He was always everyone's everything and it wore him out. He was entirely burnt out by seventeen and he only found comfort in the shadow of what he once was. What he was supposed to be. His potential was wasted because of how much he loved everyone else. He gave up every piece of himself until he was nothing. A spool of yarn no thread to spare. A sun that shone his light to the stars, leaving himself in perpetual darkness.

And you don't GET that.

My boys <33

(Art: industrations, sophithil, Alex lopez)

Then I proceeded to change everything BUT my name cuz I can't come up with anything

I just realised I desperately need a new name on here lmao