Probably My First Girlfriend

Probably my first girlfriend

wait. if you're mannimarco. and i'm mannimarco... then who's achieving apotheosis and turning into a moon?!

HIM

Honestly, Scorpio is scarily accurate

The Signs and What:

Aries: Something plastic, on the outside at least. Something that can rearrange itself ever shifting body parts into a thousand imperfect forms.

Taurus: Something that wants out. Something fighting to get out. Something that hungers for Latin jazz, and blood.

Gemini: Something with legs like saplings. The forest seems to change every time you turn around.

Cancer: Something ridden with seeds, its touch is a plague of blossoms.

Leo: Something that is a reflection of what it once was. Curiosity assuming a new and curious form. If only it had known.

Virgo: Something that acts as a metronome to hordes of jiangshi.

Libra: A mistake that believes itself more perfect than anything else. Twisted eyes see a twisted world. Twisted arms drag it along imperfect ground.

Scorpio: Something scared and hungry. Something that is so so sorry.

Ophiuchus: Something that plants trees over the bodies. Something that completes the cycle.

Sagittarius: Something covered in the brambles that killed it. Roots and blood intertwined, feeding from sun and stomach alike.

Capricorn: What looks like a german shepard made completely of human hands and smoke.

Aquarius: Something that can almost but not quite copy you. It has trouble with anatomy and scale.

Pisces: Something that remembers being human under all the wings and blood and chitin.

That Libra advice would have been helpful a few months ago when I broke my knee.

Normal Horoscope:

Aries: You are responsible for a tiny piece of the world. Treat it with the kindness you expect of yourself.

Taurus: Relax your shoulders and breathe, dipshit.

Gemini: The stars and I know its scary, but you have to lend yourself the time to not worry. One life ending nuisance at a time.

Cancer: Concern yourself with better things and the pinions that keep you here will slowly rust away.

Leo: Where do you end? How far can your voice travel? Do you know where your borders are? Or do you slowly lose force, like a gravitational field?

Virgo: Habits cannot be broken, they can only be replaced. Addict yourself to more gentle things.

Libra: All endeavors must be self centered in some way or another. Be sure that you are centered on the right parts of yourself. Knees are weak.

Scorpio: The world shapes us in odd ways. We break our toes constantly without noticing.

Ophiuchus: Its a marathon not a sprint. Its not a deathmatch either. Put down the sword.

Sagittarius: Familiar comforts can and will be shed in due time. No need to hurry the process along unduly.

Capricorn: And what, pray tell, is your best interest? Only you can know.

Aquarius: The things that beckon the long dark will have their turn. You have minecraft to play.

Pisces: A sincere apology is a rare thing. Don’t make it worse by adding humiliation into the mix.

The cha cha slide but with masturbation

Donald Trump spreads marmalade whereever he walks,just like a SLUG!

Rust take with a side of brock of lee and mushy potoooooooos