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Cqraline - Tumblr Blog
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morning fairies
laugh-out-loud sapphic comedies
i promise not all sapphic movies are indie sad shit. here are the best ones to watch with all ur gay friends. no yearning. just laughs.
But I'm A Cheerleader (1999)
This movie has everything. Aesthetic. Slapstick. Gay wrists. Natasha Lyonne plays a cheerleader who is informed that she is a lesbian by her parents (she is a vegetarian and listens to melissa etheridge) and is sent to a comically inept conversion therapy program run by a milf and RuPaul wearing tiny shorts. It ends very happy (and very funny).
Wild Nights With Emily (2018)
Less slapstick, more dry wit. This movie focuses dually on the wild life of Emily Dickinson as well as her cousin's (successful) attempts to erase her lesbianism from history. My personal favorite scene involves the cousin in question speaking of Emily and her lady friend's chaste friendship over a montage of them fucking vigorously. Also also also: milfs. This movie has milfs aplenty.
D.E.B.S. (2004)
I cannot describe this movie as anything other than "lesbian Sky High." An excellent combination of intentional spy movie parody, unintentional early 2000's cheesiness, and an enemies to lovers storyline worthy of ao3. This move is objectively quite bad, but it is also adorable and most certainly entertaining.
Birds of Prey (2020)
The criminally underrated solo film about the bisexual badass Harley Quinn after her breakup from the Joker features a cast of...colorful characters. Basically, everyone in this movie is extremely weird, extremely goofy, and also extremely sexy. This movie is the female gaze bottled and sold. A large part of the plot involves Harley trying to get her child protege to shit out some diamonds. It's great.
A League of Their Own (1992)
So let's get this out of the way first: yes, it's not technically a sapphic movie. However, it has very gay vibes and this is because 1) women playing sports and 2) the real life story it was based on is about a lesbian couple. there's a netflix documentary about it. Anyway, this movie is basically about a ragtag group of misfits playing women's baseball during World War II. Madonna and Rosie O'Donnell are clearly dating. Tom Hanks pisses a lot in this movie.
Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter (2001)
Okay, I know this one's a wild card, but hear me out: yes, this movie is terrible. Yes, you're only going to like this movie if you already like watching shitty movies (this is for the Cats, Boss Baby, Bee Movie, The Room, etc. crowd). HOWEVER. This movie is actually very progressive in terms of bisexual representation. The vampires being hunted in question exist to mock the predatory lesbian trope, except for one, who is openly bisexual and proud of it. (If you liked Velocipastor you will probably like this too.)
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CELEBRÉ Y CELE CELE. CELEBRÉ Y CELE CELE. CELEBRÉ Y CELE CELE. CELEBRÉ. ESTA JOYA ME PESA. TO ESOS GATOS ENCIMA E LA MESA. ME PROMETIERON MUCHA ABUNDANCIA. PERO YO ME NEGUÉ A SER SU PRESA
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Anya Taylor-Joy
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