So Today I Made Myself Eggs For The First Time, Im 13 So Heres Some Quotes

so today i made myself eggs for the first time, im 13 so heres some quotes

“one egg can’t burn down a house, two’s a little dicey”- me, 2022

i came here for some water, but now im gonna need a fucking cigarette because this’ll be stressful”- my uncle, 2022

“em, you are SO close to being grounded”- mom, 2022

stay tuned for more on, ‘emmerzone can’t fucking cook but xe’re trying’

*starts looking around the room* aight, where the HECK were the cameras placed?

All c!wilbur apologists know is kin wilbur soot, listen to ycgma, write dissertations on his character, cry because nothing makes sense anymore, eat hot chips and lie

Now *this* is what I call comedy

i need you all on tumblr to know that tumblr’s official twitter acc is currently hosting this space where the host is muted and a bunch of twitter peeps are discussing why the fuck tumblr has the gall

That's a brinjal

Yo tumblr tf is an aubergine

pls help

But ultra watermelon. Idk how to describe it but it's like, spinkle slonmk if that makes sense

I don't trust people who like Monster Energy. You have been bedeviled by that strange drink

WHERES’ THE CLPI?????? I NEEED ITTT

wilbur literally covered the entirety of alexander hamilton with a new zealand accent. he is the definition of scrunkly.