Anyway Adults SayingI Dont Know Isnt An Answer Is Part Of The Reason I Learned To Lie And Bluff So Well.

Anyway adults saying “I don’t know isn’t an answer” is part of the reason I learned to lie and bluff so well.

low empathy in autism is often misunderstood. i want to explain it with some examples here to hopefully help you understand how it can affect people (this is how it affects me)

low empathy actually looks like: i don’t understand that what’s fun for me might not be fun for you. i might think i’m sharing Good Feelings with you by telling you about something i love or making you play my favorite game with me, and not realize that you’re not enjoying it because i have a hard time distinguishing that people interpret and enjoy things differently. i might be confused or upset when you don’t want to hear about something that makes me very happy, because it doesn’t make you as happy as it makes me and that’s hard for me to grasp. it is hard for me to put myself in your shoes and consider that other people might not get the same excitement and joy that i get out of these things. conversely, i might refuse to participate in something most people enjoy and come off as a “buzzkill” or self centered because i don’t understand that other people enjoy something that only makes me upset. i may be confused as to why everyone is engaging in something so upsetting or simply boring, like watching sports or listening to music that i don’t want to hear.

low empathy does NOT actually look like: i don’t understand that other people have feelings and therefore, i do things that i know are wrong because i don’t care about how my actions affect other people, or don’t understand THAT they affect other people. i am mean and rude because i don’t think it has any consequences (as opposed to being rude without realizing it, which is related to social skills, not empathy)

i think that… approximately 100% of the time, parents, teachers, etc… have this misconception that neurodivergent kids & teens don’t know anything about how to handle their neurodivergence.

for years, i suffered through people making suggestions of things that were things i had done, and either weren’t worth the effort or they actually made things worse. i told them this, and if i was still having any issues with the same problem they’d say something about “well if you’re not gonna listen to any suggestions…” when I did. they’re the one who didn’t listen when i told them that doesn’t work for me. They assume that because I didn’t try it in front of them (which is often impossible), I never tried it. I tried doing my homework as soon as I got home. I tried doing my homework at the table, I tried working where I was comfortable. I tried listening to music, I tried working in silence. I tried using a planner, I tried setting reminders on my phone, I tried. I tell people that I have executive functioning issues and they say that I have to work on it like I haven’t been doing that as long as I’ve had to do things and it’s so much better than it was before. I’m as able as I am now because I’ve spent 18 years working on it.

One of my friends has ADHD, and at one point when her grades dropped her parents took her phone, despite her telling them that the only way she can focus on her homework is to listen to music, for which she needs her phone.

I was in a study hall with another friend, who also has ADHD. Sometimes, they would be able to focus and do their work. Others, they would end up being entirely unable to and would do other stuff. The “instructional support” person would start bothering them about it, insist that they try. As if they hadn’t already done so.

I am tired of watching people assume that neurodivergent people aren’t trying, or we haven’t tried. We’re always trying.

“Why do people like a character who’s committed war crimes but hate this other character just because they’re annoying” because it’s fiction Susan, and being annoying in fiction is a greater sin than being a supervillain, because it won’t make me want to read about them. It isn’t difficult to understand

My mom always underclasses her pain because she thinks of the scale as "10 is the worst" she's ever experienced and that, for her, is labor. It is for a lot of women. That doesn't mean your pain is less real than anyone else's and look at this scale for reference if you can!

My mom taught me to exaggerate my pain so that doctors would take me seriously and all I'm saying is that it hasn't failed me yet

I found the cutest picrew!! I figured I’d share it with you guys!❤️

HERE’S THE LINK

I’m tagging @n0wornever @cordeliascrown @alexpjoyner and @jaskiers-sweetkiss but anyone who wants to do it is welcome to!💖