dpi-sam - borzoi_lover_2k23
borzoi_lover_2k23

like a marine biologist but for the neurodivergent

143 posts

Peridot Continues To Cure Me Of Everything. I Think Id Be Magnificent If Peridot Continued To Love Wearing

Peridot Continues To Cure Me Of Everything. I Think Id Be Magnificent If Peridot Continued To Love Wearing

peridot continues to cure me of everything. i think i’d be magnificent if peridot continued to love wearing non-gem-projected clothing

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More Posts from Dpi-sam

3 months ago

Not that anybody asked, but I think it's important to understand how shame and guilt actually work before you try to use it for good.

It's a necessary emotion. There are reasons we have it. It makes everything so. much. worse. when you use it wrong.

Shame and guilt are DE-motivators. They are meant to stop behavior, not promote it. You cannot, ever, in any meaningful way, guilt someone into doing good. You can only shame them into not doing bad.

Let's say you're a parent and your kid is having issues.

Swearing in class? Shame could work. You want them to stop it. Keep it in proportion*, and it might help. *(KEEP IT IN PROPORTION!!!)

Not doing their homework? NO! STOP! NO NOT DO THAT! EVER! EVER! EVER! You want them to start to do their homework. Shaming them will have to opposite effect! You have demotivated them! They will double down on NOT doing it. Not because they are being oppositional, but because that's what shame does!

You can't guilt people into building better habits, being more successful, or getting more involved. That requires encouragement. You need to motivate for that stuff!

If you want it in a simple phrase:

You can shame someone out of being a bad person, but you can't shame them into being a good person.

3 months ago

early stages of friendship are Soooo embarrassing like yea sorry....... it's me again............ i enjoy talking to you and spending time with you....... you can shoot me point blank if you want i dont mind

3 months ago

I should run for president so the media can find my tumblr posts and show them to america