Hello! It's Me Hi Im The Problem Its Me Percival, And Without Prior Reserve Because I Have Absolutely

hello! it's me⎛ hi im the problem its me ⎠ percival, and without prior reserve because i have absolutely NO ability to calm down, here is kayneth el melloi archibald of fate/zero! his app is under /app :)

Welcome to radiant Isola Radiale, Kayneth!

You'll be placed in HOUSE 116.

You will be given your volumen hydragyrum mystic code, which will allow you to use your Illusions for up to thirty minutes a day!

Enjoy your stay!

– mod solaris

this is a starter call capped at like 3 except castmates of which there are many

You’re so delicious as a concept, but as a real person I worry for you

Thanks

PROMPTS FROM SHREK 2 *  assorted dialogue from the 2004 film, adjust as necessary

quick! tell a lie!

i can't believe you're just gonna walk away from the best thing that ever happened to you.

say something crazy, like "i'm wearing ladies underwear!"

i most certainly am not!

it's a thong!

i don't feel any different. do i look any different?

you still look like an ass to me.

nobody said i have the right to remain silent!

you have the right to remain silent. what you lack is the capacity.

stop. i have misjudged you.

join the club. we got jackets.

look, she's not seeing any clients today.

we're from the union.

we represent the workers in all magical industries, both evil and benign.

are you feeling at all degraded or oppressed?

okay, we're going to have a look around.

think of the saddest thing that's ever happened to you.

oh man. where do i begin?

they all got drunk and started hitting me with sticks, yelling "piñata! piñata!"

i need you to cry!

all i got in my room was shampoo.

i hate mondays.

who on earth are they?

that's not little. that's a really big problem.

we came, we saw them, now let's go before they light the torches.

they're my parents!

good! now's our chance! let's go back inside and pretend we're not home.

quick, while they're not looking, we can make a run for it.

you can do this.

i don't want to die!

oh sweet sister mother of mercy! i'm melting! i'm melting!

i'm sorry, the position of annoying talking animal has already been taken.

oh look! a little cat!

look out! he's got a piece!

are we there yet?

oh god help me! please!

tell the truth. will i ever be able to play the violin again?

i drank the potion and well, now... i'm sexy.

oh pick me! i'll be your true love!

someday i will repay you, unless of course i can't find you, or if i forget.

fear me, if you dare.

i had hoped you would never see me like this.

i'm sorry to both of you.

i just wish i could be the man that you deserve.

go! your lady needs you!

today, i repay my debt.

who dares enter my room?

i hope i'm not interrupting anything.

you are told correct, but for this i charge a great deal of money.

for five minutes, could you not be yourself?

it wasn't my fault! he didn't get there in time!

are you kidding? he's gorgeous! his face looks like it was carved by angels?

i see london! i see france!

why don't we drop in for a spell?

oh mexican food! my favorite!

you have forced me to do something i really don't want to do.

my diet is ruined! i hope you're happy.

they just want to give us their blessing.

who said i want to be part of this family?

look out! here comes the new me!

first things first. we need to get you out of those clothes.

did i miss?

pardon me. would you mind letting me go?

quit messing around!

almost everybody who meets you wants to kill you.

whatever happens... i must not cry.

can i help you, your majesty?

tell us about where you live.

i guess that will be a fine place to raise the children.

oh, stop being such a drama king.

i don't care whose fault this was, just get this place cleaned up.

i'm not going.

he's completely lost his mind!

we can't be lost.

i wasn't the one who refused to stop for directions.

you're so tense.

do you think you could get up there?

i've made changes for you. think about that.

i guess i gave her the wrong tea.

sorry. i thought that question was directed at me.

uh... FYI. not my fault.

we just need to work out something smarter, that's all.

i need to have someone "taken care of."

Kayneth's not sure if it's a good thing to see Reines here- He'd never been much of a family man- not that he didn't want to be, and not that he hadn't cared about his niece, but what time did he have to simply exist like that? The demands of lordship had stripped him of any semblance of normalcy, and as it seemed, the same was true of her. Maybe she was always this way- he'd never really stopped to notice. What he does notice is that she's older, now. He'd been away for a long time, or perhaps dead for a long time- or time had passed differently in this place.

Something told him that he had died. He was fated for something like that, fragile artist's heart that he was.

He should've been there, and instead he rushed off to war. So, what is he supposed to say to her? Sorry I never had time to spend with you? No, that would be too soft, and he had learned to lock that part of himself away long ago. Or, it was easy to lie to himself like that.

It made him more of a mage to be heartless. Someone had told her that, too- because they had both been children once upon a time. He should've stopped for a moment to look back. Especially after she'd been taken in as a sister. He'd seen that as a rather political move, because mages hadn't the slightest clue on how to give a damn about family.

If he'd chosen his artist's path, then ...

No point on dwelling on things from the past like that.

❝ I do hope this place has kept you entertained. ❞ Distant, but not cruel. He has no need to be that way to her. He's simply forgotten warmth.

Better to keep things as they always had been.

❲ @princesselmelloi ❳

take me to art museums and make out with me