Now The Meme Is Complete

✨ Now the meme is complete ✨

BSD Characters as Conversations I've Had/Witnessed At School

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Dazai: I really want to be dead . . .

Yosano: I mean, medical euthanization is an option if there's something wrong with your body

Dazai: There's a lot wrong with me in general

Kunikida: We already knew that, but you're in almost perfect health body-wise

Dazai: All I've got to do is fuck up my body as much as my mind? I can do that -

Dazai: *gets up and starts walking towards the door*

Yosano: Where are you going -?

Dazai: To jump into the road -

Yosano: Have fun -

Kunikida: NO! GET BACK HERE-

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Kyouka: Kouyou-san told me men are pointless so I should never have kids -

Yosano: She's right, you don't need men. You can still have kids though, if you want -

Kyouka: How -?

Dazai: *slides in* See Kyouka-chan, when two people love each other very much -

Yosano: *throws book at Dazai full force* Ignore him, it's a medical procedure -

Dazai: You don't know what I was going to say

Yosano; I assumed. And if you don't shut up in the next fifteen seconds I will use this plastic knife to castrate you -

Dazai: *shuffles away*

-

Fukuzawa: *staring at the Agency Members* I've accidently adopted a horde of children

Ranpo: I know, it's terrible . . . So many children

Fukuzawa: You're one of the children I adopted . . .

Ranpo: I know but I'm better than the rest of them

Fukuzawa: Debatable

Ranpo: *offended gasp*

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Atsushi: *struggling to go up the 'down' stairs while carrying a large pile of books*

Akutagawa: Oh look at Atsushi, too good for the rules -

Atsushi: *tries to turn around and a few books fall off*

Atsushi: . . .

Akutagawa: . . .

Atsushi: *starts tearing up*

Akutagawa: Wait no, no no don't cry I'm not emotionally intelligent enough to help you if you cry

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: 文豪ストレイドッグス | Bungou Stray Dogs Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Armed Detective Agency Ensemble & Kunikida Doppo (Bungou Stray Dogs) Characters: Kunikida Doppo (Bungou Stray Dogs), Miyazawa Kenji (Bungou Stray Dogs), Edogawa Ranpo (Bungou Stray Dogs), Yosano Akiko (Bungou Stray Dogs), Tanizaki Junichirou (Bungou Stray Dogs) Additional Tags: POV Kunikida Doppo (Bungou Stray Dogs), Kunikida Doppo Is So Done (Bungou Stray Dogs), Kenji has no idea what he has started, High School Drop Out Edogawa Ranpo (Bungou Stray Dogs), (please make that an official tag it would be so funny), Yosano Girlbossed Gaslighted Gatekeeped her way into being a doctor, Dazai actually being honest for once but Kunikida doesn’t believe him, Humor, is this crack? Idk and I don’t care so I’m tagging it, Crack Treated Seriously, Armed Detective Agency Shenanigans (Bungou Stray Dogs), Just an average day in the ADA’s office, probally way too many tags for a one-shot but who cares (not me that’s who) Summary:

“In my village, the adults all work together to make sure the kids know how to herd cows and plant crops.”

“You learned how to herd cows and plant crops?” Kenji nodded and Kunikida continued. “Not anything… else?”

“Yeah! That’s all you really need to know so there’s no point in spending time learning more when you could be using that time to take care of your cows.”

Kunikida supposed that made sense for Kenji’s former situation, but this was going to have to change.

“You need an actual education! You need to go to school.”

“Why?” Ranpo spoke up from his desk. “School is stupid.”

“Ranpo! How could you say something like that?!”

Yosano snorted in amusement. “I don’t think you’re one to talk, Ranpo. You didn’t even finish high school.”

“Ranpo’s a high school dropout?!” Kunikida whipped around to face Ranpo. “And you work as a detective?”

“To be fair to Ranpo, I worked as a doctor without a license for a while,” Yosano informed them. “But at least I got a license after I turned 18. And I already had a high school diploma.” She smirked. “Ranpo still hasn’t gone back to school.”

Or: Kunikida learns about his coworkers’ education situations.

“It’s never too late to change one’s ways. The sooner the better.”

—

Dazai Osamu, Pandora’s Box

he said the THING