Without My Mental Illness I Wouldn't Know Who I Am But, Because Of My Mental Illness I Have No Sense

Without my mental illness I wouldn't know who I am but, because of my mental illness I have no sense of self. Like the logic is super crazy.

bpd math :

slight change in the tone of their voice = they hate me and wish i was dead

The One People Loses

I'm the one people leave when life gets tough,

The one they only want when no one else is there,

And I'm the one they discard when they get what they want.

In fact, I'm the only one in their life they can easily let go of.

I'm the one who's picked up last,

The one whose jokes go unnoticed, never laughed at.

I won't be the one people think of when good things happen,

They don't scan the room to see if I'm sharing their laughter.

They don't consider me when they need someone,

I'm the one who always faces the choice between begging and leaving,

Because people consistently make me feel this way.

So ultimately, I'm the one people lose,

Because I always choose myself over being chosen.

🫶

the urge to get into an accident just so people would start caring about me

BPD math: they said I can come “if I want” instead of “you should come” so that means they hate me and they wish I was dead.