Shit post cm 18+
126 posts
Ewpudding - Cm & Pudding - Tumblr Blog
nothing beats the spititual connection you get when someone defends you in among us. ur just my best friend now.
My mom taught me to exaggerate my pain so that doctors would take me seriously and all I'm saying is that it hasn't failed me yet
The reading comprehension and overall common sense on this website is piss poor.
Okay so Norway is like such an odd country cause like listen to this
Norwegians consume 9% of all Pepsi max produced
Norwegians eat the second most tacos in the world, just after Mexico
Norwegians drink the second most coffee in the world, just after USA
Norwegians read the second most comic books in the world, just after japan
There are only 5 million people in Norway
TEEN HORSE GIRL MOVIE WHERE THE HORSE DIES AN HOUR IN AND THE SECOND HALF IS THE GIRL LEARNING OCCULT SCIENCE TO REANIMATE IT SO SHE CAN WIN THE BIG DERBY
“I hope this email finds you well.”
How this email finds me:
congrats on 1k!! not really an au but can you please do some hcs where peter messes with tony by calling him nicknames like “dude” or basically talks to/about him like theyre the same age and tony goes “im not your bro, child” or something like that djsjsnsj
Thank you! ❤
it doesn’t start immediately
in fact it takes quite a while until the word “dude” slips over his lips the first time
Tony is showing Peter something in lab (the first nanobots, a cool update, explains him the arc reactor in detail, take your pick)
and Peter says “dude, that’s so cool!” in awe
he doesn’t even notice that he said it
Tony notices it immediately and he doesn’t know how to feel about it
like he’s happy that Peter isn’t that intimidated by him anymore
but he also feels kinda too old to be called dude
(however, he will forever deny that he called himself “too old” for something)
so, Tony ignores it, thinking it was a one time thing because Peter has been hanging out with Ned before they met in the lab
but it keeps happening
again, Peter isn’t really realizing that he calls his idol “dude” and “bro” and every other variation of it
it just feels natural
because that’s what he calls his friends, and Tony and Peter are friends now
(which Peter still can’t really believe)
Tony keeps noticing, of course
and one day when he feels especially old because he woke up to back pains and he found a record amount of grey hairs in his beard and a kid on the street described him as an “old man”, Tony kinda snaps
“I’m not your bro, child” he says (pouting a little bit)
Peter stares at him. “What?”
“You keep calling me dude and bro. I’m not your dude, I’m not your bro. Stop calling me that.”
“But... I call that all my friends. Does that mean you’re not my friend.”
Tony sighs. “Of course, we are friends, but I don’t like being called those nicknames. They make me feel... old.”
and Peter, instead of being hurt and feel insecure about this, decides to be a little shit.
“Oh, my apologies, sir! It won’t happen again, Mr. Stark, sir!”
Again, Tony picks up on it immediately. He squints his eyes at him. “No. Bad intern. Stop that.”
“Sir, I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m only treating you with the kind of respect an... elderly person like you deserve, Mr. Stark.”
Peter continues to be overly polite and to drop as many adjectives and names that basically say old person into his conversation as possible
Peter’s texts to Tony look like this
Dear Mr. Stark, I hope this text finds you well. My name is Peter Parker, I am your personal intern who spends three afternoons a week with you and every second weekend. I am writing you in regards to your inquiry about my preferences for dinner tomorrow evening. I am happy to say that I do agree with your choice of Italian food, and I would be absolutely delighted to have pepperoni pizza for dinner. Thank you for your time! Sincerely, Peter Parker (personal Intern)
Tony hates it (okay, not completely, he is quite amused by it but he can never let the kid know)
which, of course, makes Peter go to even more extremes
he spends more and more time formating those text
eventually he writes a real letter and and faxes [sorry, but is that the right form of this verb? like, the verb to fax but I have to add an s to it because Peter is doing it. Is faxes really correct? It looks so wrong] it to Tony’s lab
Tony didn’t even know he had a fax machine in his lab
he’s convinced Peter secretly placed it there for this joke
Tony regrets getting attached to this teenager
no he doesn’t
you can learn a lot about a person by what songs are in their sad playlist
what the actual fuck
The Hotch Olympics
Stacking– the rules are simple: catch Hotch on the phone and see how many things you can hand him before he notices. The record to beat is over twenty things including a stapler, a pack of paper, three legal pads, his own badge, and (although it was only done once) a printer. If he catches you, pausing his phone conversation, you’ve been “caught” and must start over at zero. The Winners: Garcia for handing him the printer (you just can’t beat that) and JJ for the twenty items (it was a long meeting)
The Suit Jacket– that man will die in his suit jacket in the summer because he’s so damn stubborn. So, the challenge is successfully getting him out of it but he can’t suspect a thing. Some classics are the “jeez, it’s kinda cold inside the precinct :(” and making sad faces until he shrugs it off and hands it to whomever is complaining but only JJ and Garcia can pull this one off. Plus the hard part is then hiding it from him for hours. The Winner: Emily because she has balls of steal and poured coffee on his jacket while he was in it, no one can top that
The “Misplaced It”– there are two ways to successfully qualify for this one. Either move his file/pen while he’s doing paperwork on a case or shifting everything in his office two inches to the left. The Winners: Emily for moving everything in his office, Reid for moving his pen and file to the opposite side of the able where Hotch had been sitting (he didn’t notice either).
“Steal His Coffee!!”– This one might be bullying but he drinks way too much coffee so it’s for his own good. This one is an ambush sort of situation. Every time he pours a cup of coffee, take it. Even if it’s nine in the morning (because more than likely, he’s already had three cups). The Winner: Morgan took about three cups from Hotch in the break room and then drank from them in front of Hotch
“Literally Anything that Isn’t His Name”– this one is wholesome despite it’s name. This one can only be done once a year or so because they all have to do it. The rule is simple: for the day you can’t call Hotch any variation of his name. Some classics are: “dad” (Reid), “kiddo” (Dave), “dude” (Morgan but it’s really funny to see Hotch actually respond to it), “A-Aron” (only allowed because it’s funny), “mac daddy” (Emily and her balls of steal
Hotch is very aware that his team is messing with him. He doesn’t say anything because they’re having fun and most of their little games work in his favor. Besides the name one, he hates that one. There’s something deeply unsettling about Emily Prentiss calling him mac daddy while she tells him what she found at the coroners. She only pulls out in the worst possible times too. (he does secretly enjoy being called kiddo and dad though…)
in theory i coild have the coolest neck in the world and yall wouldnt know
im the perfect balance of “idc whatever” and “fuck i care so much hhjjgfdgjk”
we should abandon the current US government system and replace it with the ranking system in warrior cats don’t @ me
No matter what a post on tumblr tries to tell you, your moral and ethical stances will never be determined by what you reblog and what you scroll past. Don’t let manipulation tactics force you into doing anything you don’t want to do.
Seattle: A Series
Chapter 15: Transfer
(A/N): Better late than never today, right? Because it’s happening! It’s finally happening!! Time for lots of snark and pettiness!
Series Summary: From the moment they are assigned to each other as partners at their first placements at the FBI’s Seattle field office, Special Agents Y/n L/n and Aaron Hotchner are clearly the perfect match for each other: driven, intelligent, courageous, and both working towards the ultimate goal of becoming profilers. While learning the ropes of the Bureau, they become everything to each other: a rock, a confidant, the person they trust their life with, best friends, and maybe even something more.
Series Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Mentions of Normal Criminal Minds Things, Mentions of Sexism, Season 5 and 9 Spoilers, Mentions of Infidility/Cheating, Mentions of Divorce, Mentions of Death.
Word Count: 2.6K
Song: In Your Atmosphere by John Mayer
Seattle Playlist
Seattle Masterlist
– – – – – – – –
“Maybe one day we’ll meet again and explain to each other what really happened. Maybe one day we’ll finally understand. Until then, I hope you live your best life. And I hope you really do all the things you always said you wanted to do.” -R.M. Drake
– – – –
FOUR YEARS LATER
“Alright, I think all that’s left is your closet,” Aubrey said as she reentered, looking around my living room at all the recently packed and sealed cardboard boxes. She gave me a watery smile, which I returned with one of my own. Aubrey was someone I was going to miss the most.
We grabbed a few of the remaining empty boxes and walked back into my bedroom, most of that takedown having been done by myself and Mikey yesterday. The last of the remaining sunlight, which was coming earlier and earlier now that it was November, streamed in from the large windows I loved so dearly as we began pulling the hangers from my closet. Some clothes went into a donation pile, a few went into the trash, and most went into suitcases or boxes.
Keep reading