Double A Decade | Tbz Kim Sunwoo

double a decade | tbz kim sunwoo

Double a decade—no, more than that. 

​PAIRING » tbz kim sunwoo x gn!reader (proofread twice! lmk if i missed anything!)​ TROPE/AU » ​childhood friends to lovers, non-idol au!, holiday season au! (starts a little bit from christmas up to new years!) GENRE​ » it's so fluffy like wow...i'm not going to write something so fluff for sunwoo for a while after this, a tinge of angst, SUNWOO AND READER ARE BOTH IDIOTS, sunwoo thought his love was one-sided, very shy kim sunwoo, sunwoo being very cute and patient to the reader, reader is sick and sunwoo takes care of them uwu, they platonically share the same bed, big spoon sunwoo who is physically bigger than you and holds you to sleep, MUTUAL PINING REEEEEE, a ton of hugs from kim sunwoo because he's so...ugh, reader blushing cause of kim sunwoo, sunwoo giving his jackets that're oversized for you to use (ahhhh) WORD COUNT » 5760 ESTIMATED READING TIME » ~21 mins WARNINGS (lmk if i missed anything!) » reader is sick with a fever (if you're actually sick, please isolate yourself!), kim sunwoo being a shy idiot, one swear word (but cuts through halfway)

navi/masterlist!! 🤍

my last story for 2023! looking forward to the new year! happy 2024 everyone!

thank you for reading and screaming with me @winterchimez, @heemingyu and @mosviqu !! you three were so chaotic 😭 like ally really whipped out my government name, i couldn't tell whether sana was mad at me or sunwoo, and bar was...yeah...uhm...yeah!

(i suffered so much with the banner, i need to stop looking at it now)

Even you found this situation absurd.

How could something so beautiful cause you to have tissues and wet towels lying around your heating body? It’s bittersweet to know that the things that made you enwrap in the layer of heated and weighted blankets are the same ones every year that fall nicely from the hues of orange and red sky. Maybe it’s the headache or the jealousy as you hear the excited shrills of the children outside the window having fun and throwing the cold ball of death to each other’s faces. It’s probably also the fact that you’re at the time of your month, the cramps around the underside of your stomach in addition to the scratchy itch on your throat that makes swallowing hard. 

In the end, this year’s Christmas has been wasted and you could only cry under the sheets alone, convincing your parents not to enter as you knew they had to return to work as soon as the holidays ended. You truly regretted your past naive and idiotic self for making a snow angel without proper winter battle clothes. The effect took a massive toll on your body, especially with the amount of hours you have been working and the stress of it all. The way you spent Christmas was lonely as you looked down to the ground floor where your family gathered, a warm blanket slouched on your messy, unwashed hair. The distance between your pout and their smiles wasn’t too far but because of your dying voice and their charged voice, even your mother could barely hear your Christmas greetings.

But, there was someone in your life who still barged into your highly contaminated room with his raccoon loverboy beanie and matching handmade raccoon scarf that you gifted for him this Christmas. Even with your refutes and arguments, he just shrugs, refusing to let you spend the holiday season time alone. 

Every year has always been the same at this time of the year. From when the clock strikes midnight when the jingle bells ring from the city hall up to your room, up until around noon, you would spend it with your family. From noon, when you and your best friend would be amazed at how the snowman still kept its shape up until around dinner time, you would be all over the neighbourhood with him. Then cues the opening of gifts underneath the green tree with ornaments from your grandparents’ age, the smile plasters on everyone’s faces as choruses of ‘thank you’s would be said. Three hours before Christmas day passes, you would retreat to your room, only to have a visitor open your door, the pile of snow between the strands of his hair making the wood of your floor a tripping hazard.

Every year has always been the same for you both and Kim Sunwoo is determined to make sure that it would still be that way. The boy has always made every single Christmas memorable from the day you both were in diapers to now. He made sure that Christmas this year isn’t wasted and he proves that solidly.

Now, another day of fighting begins as you pray for your fever to die down in time for the approaching new year. Contrary to your wishes, your whole body feels like it’s been shut down, feeling too effortful to even raise a finger despite it lying on your bed for the last twenty hours.

“Sunwoo…” The tears well up in your eyes, wishing that you could at least pick up the phone to hear his stories about the day. 

“I got you!” 

The door clicks open to reveal his toothy, mischievous smile. In one hand, a filled fabric bag is held as the other fist punches the sky eagerly. If you could, you would’ve chucked all the layers of fabric to the ground for all you care, clinging onto the boy like a koala. He understands the thoughts roaming in your head as soon as he sees the way the ceiling light highlights the sweat on your forehead and the moisture around the bottom of your eyes. 

The once-upturned corners of his mouth dipped and so did his shoulders. With his free hand, the door closed quietly. He slowly approaches you, kneeling on the floor beside your bed. Sunwoo takes his mittens off, tilting his head and his furrowed eyebrows match his solemn smile. 

“The new year is literally in three days and I’m still here all wrapped up like a mummy.” He unfolded one of the new towels on your bedside table, dapping the sweat away from your flushed face. “I hate this…”

Sunwoo couldn’t hide his true feelings either, missing having you healthy by his side for more than a whole week now. The night walks were now leaning more toward miserable than lonely. He misses the way you would wrap your nearest arm with his, the other hand loosely anchoring on as well as you both comment on whatever comes into your mind. It’s during those times that you would be so preoccupied with your words that the world around him becomes silent, looking down at the slope of your nose and the shape of your moving lips dearly. 

If you look up towards him, you can see the way that Sunwoo’s eyes relax and the corners of his lips lift just slightly, looking at you with utmost adore and affection. His cheeks would be red, not because of the chilly wind, but because his heart is telling him to just hold you close, confess and kiss you deeply into the night. 

It’s no exaggeration to say that the fluttering feeling in his heart, gave his body more warmth than the mittens, beanie, scarf and winter outfit.

“It’ll pass soon, don’t worry,” Sunwoo reassures you, straightening his legs and heading to your bathroom. There, he shrieks and the laugh from the joined room, where you lay in bed with a new cold wet towel on your burning forehead tells him that you did it on purpose. “I thought that was real!” His head peaks out slightly from the bathroom door with the toy cockroach in his hand, throwing it on the duvet where it conveniently plops upside down.

“I need some laughs, okay?” It only earned an eye roll from Sunwoo, who closed the bathroom door.

Your eyes widen at the familiar actions, the sprinkling of water confirming your thoughts.

“Sunwoo!” You scold him. “You can’t stay over! I’m literally sick!”

“I’ll be fine!”

These are the only words that he says, ignoring the rest of your complaints and nagging; he knows though, that it’s just because you care for his health and wellbeing.

Your lips could only form a big mountain when Sunwoo finally does exit your now sauna-like bathroom. He had his favourite raccoon onesie on, his used clothes in one hand and was supported with his chest to avoid it from toppling over his hold. A toothbrush is leisurely in his mouth, the frothing around the inside of his lips tells you that he has no second thoughts about staying over. 

“You can’t, Woo.” An exasperated sigh comes out as soon as he slips into the room. “Why don’t you ever listen to what I say?”

The toothbrush stops its rustling sound against his healthy, white teeth and you can tell from the way his hands land on the side of his waist that he has a complaint back about you.

“As if you’ll ever listen to me.” And the rustling continues with a tune of a song.

“Touche.”

There is one thing that changed from your usual sleepovers but again, you’re not complaining as it is the best choice. Sunwoo takes out the spare roll-up mattress after excitedly knocking on your parent’s room for help. You could hear how your parents are beyond surprised by the visit but you could only smile when you hear the way they scold Sunwoo for wanting to stay beside you with your condition.

For some odd reason, he was still able to walk back into your room, showing off the white fabric on his shoulder that he held, shoulder way too high for your liking as his pride replaces the gloomy atmosphere in the room.

“Make some sort of distance between you and my bed please.”

Your tone is no longer playful, almost tired and most definitely worried. Sunwoo nods, his lips pulling into a line. At this moment, when Sunwoo sets up his bed for the night away from you, you don’t realise the clench in your heart, your hand swishing over the space beside you where he would usually cuddle with you to sleep.

“This alright?” Pulling off his sparkly doe eyes, shooting you a smile that you couldn’t possibly refute. “Alright! Goodnight!” He cheers when you nod defeatedly.

With a flick of the switch, the only thing that allows you to see your covered feet is the moonlight from outside. Sunwoo is in a better position because the lower level means that your bed blocks the shine enough for him to slumber back to sleep.

For some reason, you couldn’t. Your body is still, your eyelids shut and your calm breathing would’ve fooled anyone that you were actually in dreamland. In reality, all you could hear was Sunwoo’s more soothing snores, the sudden feeling that nothing was covering you and the uncomfortable feeling of staying awake.

Your eyelids shoot open once more, staring at the lines and scratches that managed to make it there. Maybe it was a chaotic cat? Or a really strong spiky fly? Or maybe, a ghost? Continuing a questionable amount of ideas. You didn’t even realise when your body turned to the side where Sunwoo was. Without thinking much, your arm reaches for the expensive headpiece straight to the once-slumbering boy.

Disturbed between reality and dreams, his body immediately straightens up, turning his head at you. “Hey!”

“Sorry.” You did feel guilty, not knowing that your impulse actions would jolt him so much; but your laugh tells him that once again, you did plan it with some sort of naughty reason.

Like the antagonist of a scary movie, Sunwoo’s head dips down slightly, his bangs covering his eyes and his cheek rising with menacing thoughts in his head. Suddenly, he jumps over to the mattress, wiggling his fingers all over your body.

“S-Stop! Sunwoo!” He didn’t bother doing so, his heart delighted at the sound of your laughter after so long. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry, you pathetic raccoon!”

“Oh, you’re really asking for it!”

It’s a miracle that none of your parents didn’t woke up after almost five minutes of different volumes of laughter. After a week or so of copping up in your room, unable to properly see your best friend, he makes his mark on the winter holiday, knowing that every time you fall sick with a fever, you’ll recall this fun memory.

“Can’t sleep?” 

He retreats to the edge of the bed, his legs dangling. Yet, he has his full focus on the way your smile gradually falls into a frown. His hands move under the blanket, finding yours. As soon as he feels you, his fingers intertwine with yours. Automatically, your thumb caresses Sunwoo’s, calming enough for him to sleep. Eyelids heavy but not completely down yet, your brown orbs observe the way Sunwoo kneels beside you.

“Sunwoo…”

“Hm?” 

“Thank you for staying.” 

His eyes widen slightly but he then lets out a small chuckle. “Just doing your lovely parents a favour.” 

“No.” He gulps at your seriousness, watching the way that even though your back is facing the natural light source, the growing waters underneath your eyelids make his other hand reach out for you, the movement shaking your tears down. “I meant in life. Thank you for staying with me another year.”

Your eyelashes fluttered, the darkness quietly enveloping you. Sunwoo just lets out a soft sigh, your words making his heart beat too rapidly for him to sleep tonight. 

“I love you.” 

There…

He rehearsed the confession in the mirror many times, different scenarios each time, a different object in his hand every time as he imagined the perfect gift that he would give if he was ever given a chance to pour his feelings into you. A part of him wishes you heard it, hoping that you didn’t keep this friendship going. 

The mattress that he worked hard to retrieve from your parents is left untouched for the rest of the night. Forget about his well-being for a second, prioritising the love in his heart. Forget about being sick if it meant being able to hold you in his arms just like all those times. Forget about your scoldings that he would only stick his tongue out nonchalantly to. Sunwoo climbs on the opposite side, his usual spot in your bed. He carefully slips his body inside, the air a thousand times warmer, almost making him wince at the sudden temperature rise that he didn’t expect.

For one last time in the night, he wipes your forehead clean, pressing a lingering kiss on the area. Your body recognises the dip of the bed, turning to the other side and hiding your eyes from the glare of the night into Sunwoo’s beating chest. Perplexed but still somewhat composed, he lets you get comfortable first, both of your hands reaching up to the fabric of his collar, tugging it slightly as a satisfied smile makes its way onto your relaxed face. 

“I love you.” 

He says once more.

“I love you so much, bubs.” 

A little bit louder.

“I love you so much but,” He rests his head on the pillow, pulling you further into his embrace with his hand curling over the shape of your head. “I don’t think I can stay beside you next year.”

Unrequited love his whole life. 

The trade-off between friendship and love is too much for him to fully digest. 

But as the years pass, Sunwoo knows that there is nothing much he can do but drown in his uncertainties. At the same time, he’s no longer sure how much longer he could fake another smile towards you whenever you were taken out for dates. He’s no longer sure how to keep his heartbeat at bay whenever you accidentally whip your hair across his face whenever he scared you, and the way your first instinct is to squish his cheeks, frown and check up for any hurt on his beautiful face. He’s no longer sure if he could hide the urge to pull you into his chest whenever your fingers would lace together even during the hot summer days.

So Sunwoo made it clear to himself that tonight would be the last time he would bask in your presence. Another unsure kiss is given to your forehead and against the screamings inside his head, he follows his heart to press one on each of your closed lids, whispering loving words that he desperately wishes you would hear. 

“I’m thankful for you too.”

True to his words, Sunwoo is gone by the early morning, the white blob on the floor is gone and so are the used towels that you have used throughout the previous day. Judging from the coolness of the sheets beside you, he must’ve left some time ago and it left a bitter feeling in your whole being when he left no note that would usually snap the drowsiness in you to an immediate deadpan reaction, or contrary a dog video that would make up want to curl up and stay in bed for longer.

Three distinct knocks on the door tell you that your mum has breakfast ready but you can’t respond as enthusiastically as you usually would. 

“You’re looking better today, actually.” The plastic tray rests on the corner of your table. The now-occupied space reminds you of last night when Sunwoo used the same space for his worn-out backpack. Satisfied with the way your forehead is no longer burning and almost back to normal temperature, the woman nods and lets out a sigh of relief. “Must be the Sunwoo effect.”

It did make you forget your confusion for a second, the corners of your slumped lips pulling to a straight line. When you were once again left all alone in the room, the loneliness was unlike ever before. The charging cable is ripped away from your device, opening the messaging app to text Sunwoo a very formal, very awkward morning greeting. Your eyes bore into the bottom left of the screen, seeing if the familiar typing icon would pop out but after around four minutes of empty wishes, the way you shoved your phone under the pillow shows how crestfallen you are with his isolating behaviour. It continued for the rest of the day, your phone never buzzing because of him even though his social media activity shows him posting a new memory to share over the internet.

New Year is around a few hours and to you, it looks like Sunwoo has no plans to change his indifference towards you. Even when Eric says he would make sure that Sunwoo sends a message to you, the only thing that changed in your messaging status with him is the ‘delivered’ to ‘seen’ sign.

“The audacity of this little piece of sh—” 

Your fingers tapped rapidly first, and the floating tiles of your keyboard pour your conflicted emotions with a dash of empty threats to him. It’s infuriating that the only thing he did was still, left you on ‘seen’ but this time, in real-time. 

“Okay, fine!”

Why are you so defeated? Frustrated? Annoyed? Irritated? Worried? Sour? Confused? Are you really going to spend the rest of the year without him? Start the new one without him? Is he really breaking the streak of watching the fireworks together and being each other’s first ‘Happy New Year!’s with a bunch of jumping and squealing? 

Is he mad because you’re the reason why you can’t watch the flowers in the sky with him this year? But Sunwoo knows that you’ve been sick! But if he is, is he so mad to the point that he's going to break the streak of being each other’s first ‘Happy New Year!’s next year because of it? But between you both, you’ve always beaten him by a split second!

“Fine! Be that way then!” If the framed picture of you both had noise sensitivity, you’re sure that it would’ve cowered away and fallen straight to the bin next to it. “Ignore me then! Go have fun with the rest of your friends! Why’d you come here and act like you cared when you were just going to avoid me like this?!”

As if the whole universe isn’t seemingly against you already, the bunny doll that Sunwoo won for you smiled sweetly from the corner of your room. The rubber material of your slippers makes high-pitched slaps and your arms snatch the poor plush by its neck, shaking it back and forth as you start to let out all the cursing in all the languages that you know to the boy in your head.

“You got it!”

You couldn’t hide the excitement on your face as soon as the claw hovers in the hole of the machine, a few seconds away from delivering the prize to your hands. Sunwoo rejoices and is proud after winning against the rigged game with only the first try. 

You try to wait patiently for Sunwoo to give it to you, but the way that your upper body bounces, and the way your slightly wavy hair goes along with the motions of your body, only makes it harder for Sunwoo to properly hand you over the gift. You weren’t doing anything special but he was so in love with you that he couldn’t help but let out a shaky breath at the way your eyes sparkle to him—it didn’t help his case that you were cutely drowning in his jacket. 

“D-Do you love it that much?”

Would it be weird if he snapped a photo of you right now? When your cheeks are smushed against the bunny’s fluffy ones? Would it be weird if he wanted to set it as his wallpaper and just stare at it all day long?

“It’s so cute!” 

You indirectly answered, putting your full attention and affection to the animal in your hands. The way you bopped your nose with its own only fuels his adoration for you and because you’re so immersed in your birthday gift, Sunwoo did manage to get the picture that he desires.

Kim Sunwoo also had it as his lock screen, hiding it within a collage of other memories—it’s the reason why he’s been so protective over his phone for the last few months.

Having had enough of giving the inanimate animal a headache, you threw it onto the floor with a huff, blowing the loose strand of hair away from your vision. All of a sudden, the tears finally well up in your eyes and you let out silent croaked sobs. The hunched-over plushie is the catalyst for your head to replay the memories in your head. With your back against your bed, knees folded to your chest and the bunny sitting on top, the outside world blurs out of existence for a while.

Everything is just Kim Sunwoo.

From the way he smiles.

To the way he drools in his sleep.

From the way he would literally hide you from the outside world, arms enveloping and muffling your cries.

To the way he welcomes the series of punches on his chest because life is too much for you sometimes.

From the way he has your mum on speed dial in case he can’t reach you.

To the way that he would hop into the car to pick you up from your solo late-night, early-morning beach walks still in his pyjamas.

From the way he knew how to comfort you depending on the situation.

To the way he wouldn’t mind submitting his assignment late if it meant that you’ll be able to sleep peacefully.

Your face flares up, recalling the light pressure of his lips on your eyelids the other night and with it, the meaning behind your tight hold on the bunny becomes something entirely different. That’s all it takes for you to rush out the front door, your mum following your rushed actions with her eyes.

“Well,” she shrugs, eyes back to the television of her favourite Christmas movie, “that happened.”

So maybe you should’ve changed to snowing boots or something more appropriate than your slippers but in your body’s adrenaline to keep your body intact for another five minutes when you would reach Sunwoo’s house.

“You’re so—ugh!” 

The crystals falling from the sky are too uncomfortable and you know that you will be bedridden for longer after this but that’s not going to be your fault. Someone else will take the blame for this and you’ll make it clear for him.

It’s only when you reach the front door, hands on your bent knees, throat dry, nose red, cheeks most probably iced due to your tears and the weather that the words all evaporate from your head. Nothing seemed to make sense anymore and with the curtain from the living room open just enough for you to see Sunwoo snuggling in the couch with his cup of hot chocolate, the feelings that you have been hiding from him amplified greatly.

You’re so mad at him but you still think he looks cute with the blanket over his head, covering his shoulders and eyes focused so much to the point the colours of the graphics were being reflected on his eyes. Changing the direction from kicking down the front door, you decided to instead gather a lump of ice into your palm, striking it against the window where his face was. 

His body jolts back but it didn’t take long for his mind to register the white remnants crumbling on the glass, window frame and sill. It takes Sunwoo less than a second to take in your shivering figure on the other side of the window and he knows he’s going to get an earful from his mum when she sees the sweet and sticky drink on her carpet.

The coat hanger rattles and almost breaks an arm with how violently Sunwoo takes two of his warmest jackets, swiftly getting ready to meet the cold and starting blizzard outside. He automatically winced when nature slammed the door open, almost stubbing his toe—but maybe that’s his karma for leaving you on read for more than a whole day without a proper explanation.

Sunwoo took his focus away from the throbbing pain, skipping down the stairs, using the spiky handrail for support as he pushed his body up whenever he went down a step lower, relaxing when his feet landed on the ground safely. It’s only been a few minutes since he stepped out of his blanket but now everything is throbbing—his heart as well for a different reason.

Seeing you still facing the window, your hair flying all over the place, your chin basically on your chest, Sunwoo realises that he hurt you badly. Maybe he should’ve just been honest. If so, then at the very least, you wouldn’t chase him out like this when it looks like you just started to feel better. 

“Hey…” his feet make cautious little shuffles, scrunching the remaining mixes of nature and ice, kind of scared for his life that you would start to (rightfully) punch him. Thankfully, he got close enough to drape his jacket onto your shoulder, zipping up the front without asking you to put your arms. If it wasn’t for the fact that he ignored you, he would be teasing and asking you about what you are mulling over. “Let’s go inside, hm?”

Sunwoo sighs at your stubbornness when you shoved his arm away, feet planted on the ground.

“Go away.” 

His heart clenches at the way you probably meant that. It included a hint of hurt, broken the unanswered questions that were swarming your head.

“I’m sorry,” Sunwoo said so softly that you could’ve missed it if it wasn’t the way you were already actively focusing on him. “So please, let’s just get you inside. It’s my fault, I’m sorry.”

His palm goes over where his heart is and the other hand gives you a reassuring press. Sunwoo knew by the way you refused to look at him despite him bending over to meet your eyes, that this was going to be tough for you to listen to him.

But Kim Sunwoo is patient.

He’s always been patient and understanding when it comes to you. When his hands reach over to envelop yours, you don’t push away how he wraps his own between yours. Your heartbeat picks up its pace when he leads your joined hands into the pocket of his jacket, his thumb gliding over your skin. The act also sends your body closer to his, finally closing the gap between your bodies, sharing body warmth corresponding to the red hues on your cheeks.

Your lips now hover over his outwear and your nose takes his scent in, enjoying breathing in the familiarity after almost two days of no contact. Sunwoo bites his lips, nervous about having you in front of him and the way you tighten your hold on his hands tells him that you have a lot to say. 

“You don’t want to spend the first week of the new year bedridden, bubs.” Wordlessly and timidly, Sunwoo just scans over your facial features, his eyes roaming about while your eyes are stuck on his zipper which is halfway done.

“Don’t call me that…” Because it clicks open the surge of feelings that you have been trying to hide from him for the longest time. “Don’t…”

You were still half awake when he said his words.

Unknowingly to Sunwoo, you heard every single word that you have always wanted to say to him. That night, when his hand wrapped securely around your waist, you had the best sleep in your life, taking a mental note to talk about the topic later on.

Only to realise that you are both idiots with your feelings.

“I’m sor—”

“Stop apologising!” 

And it sends Sunwoo into a puddle of shock and confusion when your eyes send out a waterfall. He separates his hands from yours and they fly quickly to hold your cheeks. Stutters of more apologies string out and his thumbs weren’t fast enough to keep your face dry. 

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry too!”

“Hey, what are you sorry about? I’m the one who left you on read!”

“I’m sorry that I’ve never told you how much I appreciate you,” you hiccup before continuing, seeing a glimpse of Sunwoo’s gaping mouth, “I’m sorry that you’ve always been the one taking care of me and not the other way around,” and you see the way he shakes his head with furrowed eyebrows, “I’m sorry that I ever make you think that I don’t care about you!” 

“Hey, no. Don’t say that, I know you care abo—”

“I love you, Kim Sunwoo!” 

To him, even though Christmas has passed, he’s convinced that it’s a miracle for him. The night when he left to stay in your house, he innocently wished upon the shooting star, closing his eyes and hoping for your health and happiness—but he couldn’t help but also wish that you would love him back even though that’s out of his control.

But what can he do when he’s only loved one person and one person throughout his whole life?

“I’m sorry if I ever made you think that I like someone else because I can tell you now that all those dates I went to only made me sure that I’m so in love with you and you make me feel like I can just be myself when I’m around you and I also feel jittery when I’m around you and—”

This is not the type of confession that he has rehearsed for.

He guides your face into his chest, still sobbing and crying. As always, your hands weakly hit him, your lips still voicing out muffled confessions to him. Sunwoo’s arms wrap around your shoulders, the other on top of it. His head dips, his lips breathing out air near your ear, resting his forehead on his arm for stability. He wants to say something, anything to make sure that his avoidance doesn’t mean that he doesn’t love you back but all he wants to do is to just hold you closer to make it clear that no one could take you out on another date.

Only he can take you out on dates now.

You sniffle, catching your breath after letting your feelings out. The hold around you makes you melt, smiling before turning to where Sunwoo is. At your longing stare, his head shoots back up in surprise, tripping over his own words at how you look at him with beady, watery eyes in adoration. Shy Sunwoo is going to be a sight that you’ll get used to quickly, noting how adorable he is with how his eyes refuse to meet yours and his lips moving without any sound actually coming through.

“I love you.” 

You repeated quieter just for him so that he was the only one who could hear the words.

“I love you so much.”

You stood on your toes, planting a kiss on his chin.

“I love you so much but,” Sunwoo gulps with how you squinted your eyes, “if you leave my side next year, I won’t hesitate to throw a snowball to your face.”

“Oh God, please don’t do that.” Mortified and shaking his head, “I’m sorry, you win. I’ll do anything, just please have mercy on me.”

“Anything?”

Sunwoo gives a series of firm, convincing nods.

“Kiss me.”

The words took a while to register in his mind and he couldn’t help the breath hitching when he realised your request. Sunwoo almost stumbled backwards, your hands tug the fabric of his pockets, pulling him back to you and reality. It caused your foreheads to lightly bump and the impact made you wince at his stupidity. 

“I-I’m sorry! I-I’m—”

“Kim Sunwoo! There’s going to be a mark there! That hur—”

A pair of comforting hands hold your jawline, tilting your face to accommodate the height difference between the two once-best friends. When Sunwoo gets a better grip on himself, he quickly dives in when your lips part, swallowing your complaints and making his dreams come true. 

Double a decade—no, more than that. 

That’s how much he’s waited for this moment with you.

When his lips would slot against yours, hugging your top ones with his before pulling away to give the same amount of affection to your bottom ones. Your noses bump into each other slightly, making the moment seem real and fun, smiling and giggling when you both part for air. Shy and kind of embarrassed with how messy and uncoordinated it is but you both know you wouldn’t want to share each other’s firsts with anyone else. 

At this moment, it’s you and him in this world.

That’s how you ended the year. Clenched fist still inside his pockets, though that didn’t stop you from folding the fabric back so that you could have your arms wrapped around his middle to pull him closer. The sky soon blooms shortly after, and the happy firing noises illuminate the night sky, beating the dull light and colour of the moon that everyone sees every day. Because of the dynamic colours, Sunwoo is able to see the shades of the celebration mirrored on your skin, finding you more beautiful than ever before. 

Though beautiful, the fireworks did make Sunwoo roll his eyes when he seemingly needed to repeat variations of “Be my girlfriend!” even though you were less than ten centimetres away from his face. He knows after your third “What? I can’t hear you” that you were playing with him, giving you pecks of his lips across your face playfully, enjoying how your laughs neutralised the flowers in the sky. 

You ended the year with the start of a kiss with your best friend.

And start the new year with a new title for your ex-best friend.

With Kim Sunwoo, of course.

navi/masterlist!! 🤍 tags (send a dm/ask if you would like to be here!): @deoboyznet 📢❤️ @k-labels 💙🤍 @k-films 🤎🎞️ @kflixnet 📺🍿

I'M LITERALLY NOT?!

The outside world is so confused 🤣😭

My parents r fighting @from-izzy @heemingyu

honestly during the time i was avoiding you all, every single time you messaged me, my heart literally cried and broke a little bit each time 💔 i love you and thank you for always buzzing my fitbit with notifications at any time of the day

[17:58] | tbz kim sunwoo

» ​PAIRING: tbz kim sunwoo x gn!reader (proofread a couple of times but pls tell me if i missed something!)​ » TROPE/AU​: friends to ??, friends to strangers, friends to 'just classmates', miscommunication (?) trope, i'm sorry i have no idea how to explain this tbh..., high school au!, non-idol au! » GENRE​: angsty hurt but fluffy comfort, 'friendship' breakup (with the intention of coming back together when time is right!), they both say "i love you" to each other and it's meant to be platonic but it can be interpreted romantically, if you do interpret it romantically then mutual pining that is somewhat figured out in the end???, sunwoo is also very comforting, loving, patient and understanding to reader's own worries and trusts reader in their personal journey as they figures out their own hardships in life » WORD COUNT: 3576​ » ESTIMATED READING TIME: 13 mins » WARNINGS (lmk if i missed anything!): hardships with past relationships with others, anxiety and fear regarding making bonds with other people, running away as a mechanism to escape reality

navi/masterlist!! 🤍 part of 'especially to you...'

how blessed i am to have you beside me when real life doesn't work out. how blessed i am to be able to go on the main chat and just be myself. how blessed i am to be able to call you my friends. how blessed i am to be accepted by people over the internet, who ended up supporting me in one of the hardest times of my life.

i love you all. i'm sorry that i'm unable to include everyone but i hope you know that in friendship groups, everyone has an effect on one another. even if person a isn't close to person c, person b may be the reason why you're still in the same group together. we all influence each other and i love you all so much.

i'm so sorry for everything.

"So what? That's it?"

The solemn tone in his voice makes the hues of orange and pink in the sky behind him take away the beauty of the scene you both love. It seemed that even the birds that would usually sing beautifully at this time stopped as soon as you opened the door of your house, knowing well who used his entire fist to bang on your door.

Sunwoo's bangs stuck to his forehead well, showing the physical exertion that his body took to get to your house. His school blouse is half untucked and you realise that maybe he rushed out of gym class in the last period because of his mismatched buttons and how his tie wasn't around his collar properly. His eyes flared with a hint of sadness though the confusion and anger masked most of the emotion behind. Your eyes diverted down to his untied shoelace. Usually, you would scold him and he would give that annoying smile to you, shrugging his shoulders and being completely relaxed whilst answering you with a "You're going to do it for me anyways." Judging by his slumped-over school bag, you guessed that he probably threw it to your 'welcome' carpet as soon as he arrived—even though he knew that he probably wasn't considering that you've been avoiding his entire presence for a whole month.

But even when Sunwoo looks at you with that heartbroken gaze straight to your tired, cold eyes, you don't utter any words to him. The slight bounce of your head made him turn his head away, clenched fists beside his body. You also found your arms crossing around your waist, palms hooked around your figure and your fingers wrapped around your body to ground the tears that you knew would flow if you didn't keep telling yourself to 'keep it together'.

"Don't you think I deserve some kind of explanation?" 

Just from a glance at him, you note the tiredness on his face even with his furrowed eyebrows. Not once did he raise his voice at you even though you can see how he's holding back with how tense his jaw is.

"God, Sunwoo." You exclaim to him with a sarcastic laugh after, "I get that we literally became the best of friends as soon as we met two months ago but shit happens and you can't expect an explanation for everything that happens."

"Of course not!" Sunwoo's voice rises though it doesn't seem to shock you. "Shit happens, I know! But at the same time, I never thought our friendship was so weak and insignificant that you could ignore me for more than a month. I know you read my messages! The app can't show me that but I know!"

"Ok fine, I did!" You spill the truth that you've been holding back. "What are you going to do about it? They’re my messages, not yours!"

Sunwoo didn't know how to counter that. Maybe there wasn't a way to counter the statement because it's true. But you both knew that the unresponded messages were only the tip of the iceberg of why Sunwoo finally decided to confront you for your isolation from him.

"What happened?" Fragile and weak, shoulder dropping closer to the ground, "Talk to me. I'm here for you."

And he breaks. 

The tears that he only released in his bedroom were finally showing itself. He didn't think that it would be infront of you first. He thought that maybe his other friends would see it first but that one tear that escaped was the start of his waterfall. 

"You wouldn't understand." You slightly scowl at the innocent boy, forcing the words between your teeth, "I mean that wholeheartedly and not from some cliche teen romance movie shit." 

The venomous response he gets to his genuine question only makes Sunwoo frown further and he verbally starts to express the tears from his eyes. Seeing him cry and swallow down his whimpers struck a chord in your own confusing heart as well.

The truth is that you're scared. 

You're scared as hell.

You're scared of the fact that even though you met Sunwoo two months ago, you grew so fast to him.

There were days that sometimes he would understand you more than your best friend of five years.

Do you know how scary that is? 

To connect with someone so fast that sometimes all you want to do after a long day is to text them about all the minuscule things to the bigger things that would make your jaw drop.

To open that messaging app, spam him with short sentences, and feel the guilt of passing the dot beside the other messages that your other friends sent first, to just open your conversation with him first?

The confusion that you finally felt at home with someone so quickly and that you felt that when you never expected it to happen? All you ever wanted from your relationship with others was to be included.

Kim Sunwoo did just that in a span of a month compared to five years.

You would spend nights figuring out how it happened but no matter how much you thought of it, you couldn't find that one specific message and timestamp both in your phone or memories of how you would wake up and just hope for a chaotic message from him. 

One mutual turned to two, which turned to three and the euphoric feeling increased exponentially. However, so did the fear escalated further when you got included in the group chat with the friends that he had before you both met. 

You have always been amazed at their friendship. Despite the small age difference here and there between each person, despite using honorifics to still respect that age gap, it never stopped the radiant chaoticness that they brought everywhere they went, in everything they did. Their personalities that are so different but work together so well to the point that it makes you believe that opposites do attract.

Their differing body clocks that would mean that the group chat never dies no matter where the clock hands land. Being able to connect with them, making genuine bonds through all the bullying (that is full of love), heart-to-heart or supportive conversations, relatable life struggles relating to schoolwork and living, fangirling about their achievements in life, asking for help with things that you’re confused about, the fun flirtings that would leave the others speechless—you realise that this is all you've ever wanted and the fact that you received it when you were at your lowest guard, scared every single part of you.

The very first few moments when you came, you were jealous of their bond, wondering how they became so close even through their differences. Then, as time passed and you inserted yourself in the conversations, it felt like you were flying across a cloudless sky, feeling reassured that your wings wouldn't get wet from the rain. After, you became scared of your presence with them, scared of ultimately breaking them apart.

But, do you know the irony of it all? 

You were the one who decided to ignore not only Sunwoo but every single kind-hearted person there. No one pushed that on you. But whenever they would post their photos on the group chat for distribution, reminisce their memories together, or when you would hear one of them talk about it with people outside the group chat, you find yourself jealous and hurt that you weren't part of it all.

Does anyone understand the confusion, guilt, self-hate and pain that it all brings?

"How do you know if I would understand or not if all you've done is left me on read in an app that can't even tell me that?"

Your breath hitches and your voice box only lets out a small gasp. Everything Sunwoo is saying is correct because everything is due to your insecurities and fear that everything will just fall apart. You truly believe in the fact that nothing lasts forever. That belief alone is the reason why you have trouble making friends.

Because for you, why would you put yourself in so much happiness that your cheeks would hurt from the laughter and smiles when you know that everything would end anyway?

But at the same time, your heart is trying to pull you in the opposite direction. Because in a similar logic, if you know that nothing lasts forever, why can't you just accept that fact and cherish him, the memories and the times that you could potentially spend together?

"Sunwoo," right now, you allowed the facts to speak out for you, refusing to follow what you truly wanted, "you have been blessed with the most lovely, encouraging and supportive group of friends. You and me," your index finger points to your chest after pointing at his, "we have experienced totally different friendships."

Sunwoo is beyond confused. Of course, he would be. You've never even given him a chance to understand your experiences. What you did was isolate yourself from him and the group chat that has given you hope that maybe, just maybe, this is your group of people. Your heart broke beyond what you could even comprehend when some of them personally sent a message to you, asking your whereabouts and hoping that you were doing well. On lonely nights as you monitor the cheerful group chat, all you can do is intertwine your hands together around your phone, the tips of your fingers turning white due to the pressure as you hold yourself back from including yourself in the fun conversation.

"Sorry but maybe I'm just not ready."

Sunwoo watches your blank stare, your eyes that used to be so full of glimmer and happiness are now void. He took in the fact that you were probably half-conscious at the current moment as you just stared at whatever was just above his shoulder in the distance but he didn't need to turn around to know that you were not focusing on anything in particular.

He wipes the tears that clouded his view of you before carefully asking, "For what?" 

Your shoulders rise but they hold their position for a second longer before falling back down, "For whatever this friendship is."

Your eyes catch the way his eyebrows crash together as well as the audible nervous gulp and shaky lips, "Is our friendship just 'whatever' to you now?" The volume decreases with each word in the question.

The heaviness in your heart that you carried the past month started to take its toll on your head and you closed your eyes to focus on the chilling wind hitting your face. Sunwoo watches quietly, still waiting patiently for you to ground yourself back to the present. The boy watches your arms untangle from your chest, dropping back to the side of your body and he finds himself wishing that if he stepped forward and opened his arms, you would reciprocate the same loving action back. 

But he knew you wouldn't. Not now when you flutter your eyes open so delicately with an emotion that he has never seen from you.

"I'll always love you, Sunwoo.” 

These are the words that manage to both break and put the pieces of his heart back together. There is no way he could admit it to you now, especially with how things are going but deep down in the lonely past month that he spent, it’s the exact words that he has been waiting and wanting to say to you as he wishes that he could hear it back from you. Now that he has heard it straight from you, not through written text or a voice message, but face to face, his world starts to rebuild itself slowly.

You both only focused on each other’s faces like it would be the last time you both would ever be able to do so. You straighten your back, no longer slumping and cowering away in fear now that you’ve said the words that have always been on your mind. With your slightly newfound confidence and a somewhat lighter heart, Sunwoo sees a bit of colour start to paint your once-pale skin. Your slightly pink cheeks that are in the same beautiful shade as your lips. Your eyelashes that flutter silently in the cold weather around you—and he finds himself wanting to bring your body in a hug to bring some warmth for you both—and finally, your eyes that held all the stories, ones spoken and unspoken, the same ones that he would eventually find himself thanking the teacher for assigning your seat next to his. 

In the silence that held many meanings for you both, you observe your best friend as well. Your neck tilts slightly to accommodate the height difference, watching how some of his bangs are now free from his sweat and are now in a mess due to the wind, his big round eyes that would disappear mischievously whenever he would tease you about something, only to soon have his bright, wide smile mirrored back to your face. You realise now more than ever that you may never see that cute gummy smile of his anytime soon. 

But you needed to be true to yourself. You needed to figure out your feelings first before you could commit to another friendship that could tear you apart once again. 

You needed to learn to love yourself again before you could go and introduce yourself to others.

Through your friendship with Sunwoo, though short and sweet but still special, you promise that after this, you will never put someone else in this kind of feeling ever again. Things would change from now on and there’s very little that you can do regarding your friendship with Sunwoo now, especially when you were the one who made the mess.

Maybe now after this revelation, he wouldn’t want to be near you anymore or maybe he will wait for you. Maybe he won’t tap on your shoulder anymore during class when you’re dazing off into the gloomy sky and just let you get in trouble with your teacher who will have called your name multiple times. Maybe as he passes by the hallway, his arms around his friends, he won’t even spare you a glance, reserving his smile for just them instead.

But again, there’s nothing you can do now. The words have been said and actions regarding the words have already been carried out.

Did you regret it? 

The shortest and fastest answer: Yes. 

Maybe you could’ve just come clean and told him how you feel. Sunwoo would then do that thing where you both would walk to the nearby park by the school and listen to your rants patiently, straightening and bending his legs as he sits on the swing to give him a bit of momentum, nodding thoughtfully to your worries. Then after, he would stretch his arm from behind the chains and pat your slumped back rhythmically. Just like every single time after that, you would both go for a bubble tea run before Sunwoo would panic text you about an assignment or homework that he forgot to complete and you would panic with him, helping him through the all-nighter that you both have gotten concerningly used to.

…gosh, why didn’t you just do that?

If this friendship was going to end anyway, why didn’t you take the easier, non-confusing, less painful way for the both of you? Why did you have to drag others through so much heartbreak just because of your cowardice? Why did you have to be so unthoughtful and unfair to everything and everyone that you genuinely love? You don't care if you have to get hurt as long as they're fine.

Please…just not them.

You are so unfair, unkind and selfish. He was the one pulling the weight of the friendship and you led him on blindly with that fake smile of yours, pretending that everything was fine. The audacity of you to even wish during the times when you cried alone underneath the blanket that he would forgive you. 

You wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t—that thought also extended to your other ten dear friends too.

A few more minutes pass and you are the one who breaks the prolonged eye contact after putting the features of his face into your memory. Sunwoo could only let out a solemn smile, his feet planted still on the ground even though his legs shook a little bit and he clasped his hands together infront of him, looking down at the grey pavement of your entrance for the first time since he arrived.

“Okay.”

The words seemed more permanent than both of you liked but it was the only response that Sunwoo could give to you at the moment. He missed the way you dropped your head to face the ground. Your body moves to lean over to one side of the doorframe, both your hands reaching over to clench the white metal to keep your posture and emotions somewhat stable.

The bag that was in your field of vision gets dragged away from your figure and you know from the shadow that Sunwoo is dusting off the dirt, ready to walk away for the day—from the friendship that you ruined. The sun behind him has almost fully hidden itself behind the taller buildings that you would have always thanked whenever you were in your room, wanting to get away from its scorching heat and intense light but now, you wished it would stay around longer…just a little bit longer. 

But maybe, Sunwoo is your sun and he hears your internal pleading because he steps forward, his everyday school sneakers coming into your view. 

“Whenever you’re ready, alright?”

Maybe it was your growing heartache and headache but the way he mutters it, just a volume above the singing crickets as the birds retreat their song for the day, seemed genuine. Most importantly though, it didn’t seem permanent at all. It’s almost as if Sunwoo is telling you indirectly that he will always wait for you. To tell you to figure out your internal fight first but that he’ll always give you a helping hand and that boba treat if you ever call him for help. To tell you that he will always get you in trouble during class and stick his tongue out if he’s successful. To tell you to stop ignoring him in school now that he is getting some sort of closure from you. 

Thankful for the memories and comfort, your head rises from the depths of your darkness and Sunwoo shines brighter than the huge star behind him. For what you both know will be the last one in a while, Sunwoo purposely lets out a loud sigh, one that is playful and is accommodated by the upturned corner of his lips before resting his open palm on the top of your head.

“I will always wait for you.” 

To his words, the stars in your eyes fell and for once, you were glad that you finally showed your tears to him. You hoped that he would know just how much you are genuinely sorry for all of this. Giving him an actually convincing nod that he seemed to accept. You watch your best friend stuff his hands inside his pocket, turning away from your front door and walking his way back down the stairs to being just classmates—just for now.

No more words were exchanged after and everything seems to pass by excruciatingly slow. Neither of you had the courage and strength left in your being to call out for the other anymore. Sunwoo would go back to his friends and you would be left alone but that’s alright because you love them all. You would gladly kick yourself out of the picture if it meant that there would be no awkwardness or unsettling feeling in the group.

As soon as Sunwoo disappears from your sight, he takes all the happiness and warmth that he would offer to you unconditionally, but you also hope that he left all his worries and frustrations here at your front door. The clicking of the door when you close it is empty and the dragging steps that you take to the other end of the hallway to your room are still heavy. You had no more words for the devil in your head that laughed at you victoriously, the insecurities bouncing from the purple walls of your room as you sat at the edge of your bed.

But when your phone turns on with a notification that you didn’t expect, you know that the angel inside your head will be working their hardest to strengthen your mindset. There, visible from your lock screen is a new message from Sunwoo. Between your sniffles, you manage to let out a momentary chuckle at the new profile picture: Sunwoo behind you wrapping his arms around your neck, holding his phone out on selfie mode for the both of you to smile at—it’s the latest picture of you both. Your eyes then divert to the new message, one that would push you to keep going until you could face him once more and be back in his arms:

“I’ll always love you too.”

navi/masterlist!! 🤍 'especially to you...' tags (send a dm/ask if you would like to be here!): @deoboyznet 📢❤️ @k-labels 💙🤍 @k-films 🤎🎞️ @kflixnet 📺🍿

i literally just woke up ☹️

i'm not letting you beta read ever again 😤

(ally even whipped up my government name!!...that's wild!!)

my posting criteria: my heart needs to physically feel something at least three times

no context for the outside world but this story made me realise something. thank you for reminding me, honey bee 💕

Forced Love (Kim Sunwoo)

[Yandere themes. Contains stalking, murder and what not. 6k+ words. Enjoy :) idk what else to write 😪]

Run

That's all you had in mind. Run. No matter what just keep on running. You knew this was one of the only chance you will get. No way you were gonna miss it. All you had to do was get to the roadside and look for someone who could save you. You knew that you could not make it out at night. Looking around, you climbed on the highest tree in hopes of not getting caught. Your adrenaline rush made you lose all your sleep.

Relaxing for a bit but still being alert you carefully looked down...seeing how Sunwoo was looking around while looking for you. You held in your breath as you saw how he stopped right under you. One wrong move and you're done for...he stopped for a while as he was catching his breath. As he started running again you finally took a deep breath.

You stayed on the tree till Sunwoo came back again. As soon as he came back you waited for some time to make sure you were not caught. After a while you slowly got down and started running towards the road side.

You have been running for quite awhile. You frantically looked around for a place from where you could call your sister. You knew it was best to call from a telephone. On a distance you saw a telephone booth. It looked quite old so you hoped that it would still work. Immediately running there you removed the few coins you had stollen from Sunwoo.

You waited for the other other line to pick....ring after ring..."Hello?"

As soon as I heard her voice my tear's started flowing. "Miyeon..." "Y/N? Is...is that really you??" I could hear how shocked she was. Chocking back my sob "Yes...can you come pick me up? I don't know where I am. I am really scared. It's a blessing I still remember your number. I am really scared unnie..." forming these words got more hard as you started noticing how much of a bad condition you were in. "Stay...stay where you're! I will track your location down with police help! I am coming, hmm?" "Please come fast. I can't hold up any longer. And I don't know on when he will come back again. Please I don't want to go there again unnie." "I am coming. Just be on the line!"

Those small minutes felt like hours. Being here was already hard enough knowing Sunwoo can come here anytime. As I was about to doze of I saw a car coming in front of me. Looking up I saw Miyeon coming out of the drivers seat. I immediately stood up and ran towards her.

"Oh my god. Y/N...baby you look so thin. Come on. Sit." Saying that she made me sit beside her as she immediately started the car. As soon as I came in the care of my sister I immediately dozed of because of fatigue and lack of sleep.

"Y/N...wake up." I slowly pried my eyes open as I saw that we were in a drive thru. "Would you like some burger and chicken wings?" I nodded at whatever she said. "Here. Have some Matcha latte till we get the order." I slowly took the drink from her hand as I took a sip of it. With a content sigh I slowly looked out the window. "For...how long was I missing?" I asked slowly as I turned my head towards Miyeon... "6 months. Each day felt like hell knowing you were in trouble. I tried everything. I even called Kevin to look for you but there were no traces of you. It's like.....you just disappeared." I took in everything she said. I knew that I was missing for a long time but almost a year? Who would have known what would have happened if I wouldn't have escaped Sunwoo....

"Oh here. Eat up. With Kevin's help I have booked a flight for both of us. We will board the flight tomorrow night. It is the best if you don't contact anyone....we're going back to mom and dad. Joshua is also with them. Don't contact anyone till we're in the plane."

I nodded my head as I took a bite of my burger. I was definitely not going to take any risk of getting caught. So contacting anyone else is something I would not even think about.

🐾The next day 🐾

I was packing all my clothes in my luggage. I am not at all gonna take anything thing else from here rather then the clothes same goes to Miyeon. Who knows what Sunwoo might have done to them.

We even bought a new pairs of shoes in case there was a tracking device on the previous ones. Right now Kevin was in my room helping me pack my clothes.

"Well I guess that's all...." I said as I looked around the room incase I left something... "thank you for coming to help me Kev. I really appreciate it.."

"It's okay Y/N. Oh by the way I will also come to Canada after settling some things here."

"Please be careful now that you will be alone here. I don't trust Sunwoo. Settle everything as fast as possible." I was worried that Sunwoo might hurt Kevin. Knowing how he can get I was worried about Kevin's safety.

"Don't worry. I can take care of myself. I will make sure not to be out late at night. Come on. Let's order some Chinese food." We that we both exited my room as we went to the living room.

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

I was busy keeping my bag in the backseat as Miyeon was having some talk with Kevin. I sighed as I waited for her and Kevin to come. Miyeon came and sat in the backseat as Kevin sat in the drivers seat.

He started the car as soon as they both got in.

As we were on our way to the airport I kept looking out the window.

"What's bothering you?" I heard Kevin ask as I looked at him. I shrugged my shoulders as I looked out the window again.

"I...I don't know. I am just worried that what if Sunwoo finds me again. Just nervous that's all."

"Hey you don't have to worry. Nothing will happen to you there. We will make sure of that. I will make sure of that. You can also pursue your career in literature how you always wanted to. I know some great universities and Joshua is also there for you."

I sighed as I nodded my head. I am just overthinking probably. Nothing can go wrong. We just have to board this plane and this nightmare will come to an end. I closed my eyes as I wanted to have some peace.

"Um...Kev...do you see that car? I think we're being followed..." as soon as I heard what Miyeon said I shot my eyes open as I looked at the rear view mirror. Seeing that car bought back...memories. Unwanted memories. I looked at Kevin. "That's...that's Sunwoo's car Kev. What do we do now??" I said nervously as I glanced at him. He had a straight face on as she slowly started speeding up.

"Kevin you can't stay here. He knows you now. You have to come with us. It's dangerous for you to stay here alone. Once we get to the airport he won't be able to do anything in front of all those people. Let's book a flight for you, if we can find one with us it's better. I can't let you be alone here." Miyeon said as she contacted someone on her phone.

"Yes Kev. You can't stay here any longer. At least alone. Sunwoo is dangerous. You will have to come with us." I said that as I rubbed his hand in assurance which was on the side.

Kevin glanced at me as he gave me a small smile. "I will. Don't worry. I can't leave you alone there when I know  what you have been going through."

I grew anxious every passing second. As soon as we got to the airport me and Miyeon went out of the car as we took our bags. Miyeon had called one of our close friends to come and pick up our car.

From my side I could see Sunwoo getting out of the car making me panic. Miyeon immediately took my hand as we ran in the airport. Kevin went ahead to get a ticket for himself.

"Did you get a ticket?" I asked as I nervously looked at him

"Yes. Luckily there was one seat left. Come on now."

We immediately boarded the plane. As we sat down on our respective seats I looked at Miyeon with a worried look.

"Sunwoo now knows that we're going to Canada....we can't stay there...what do we do now??" I asked as I started biting my nails in nervousness.

"Don't worry. As soon as we get of this plane we will immediately board the plane which will take us to LA. We can't stay a night in Canada. It will be dangerous. You stay here. I will go and talk with Kevin about this." Saying that she kissed my forehead as she walked away.

Sighing I decided to take a nap.

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

We just got of the plane. Miyeon was booking our flight tickets as we both sat down. I was looking around as Kevin spoke up

"You up for Starbucks? I am thirsty and we could use some coffee to keep us awake." I nodded at him as I stood up.

Me and Kevin went to Miyeon to ask her if she wanted anything. After that we both went to Starbucks. As we gave our order to the cashier we both sat down at a vacant table.

"So what are you gonna do in LA? You got dragged in all of this because of me." I said that as I looked at Kevin with a small pout on my lips.

"Hey. None of this is your fault. I decided to help you. And I can do some work there. Till we settle down I can work in a cafe or something. Then I can start my art there too. Let's see what life brings ahead of us. Cheer up now." I nodded as I gave a small smile to Kevin.

We went back to Miyeon once we got our order.

"Where's my sandwich and drink?" She asked me as soon as she saw me.

"Calm down woman. Here's your order. I may have drank some of your drink." As soon as I said that she glared at me and hit me on my head. "Where's your food?" Miyeon asked as she took a bite of her sandwich. I looked at Kevin as he passed me my food.

"At what time is the flight?"

"In a hour or so. We will reach LA late  at night. So we will have to book a hotel room for us. I already looked for some nice hotels there. You both can choose one amongst yourself." I nodded as I took a bite of sandwich. Silence fell upon us as we enjoyed our food.

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

We all boarded our plane to LA. It has been a while since we're on the plane. Miyeon and Kevin were asleep. I couldn't get myself to sleep again. This all still feels like a dream. Escaping from Sunwoo and now getting away from him.

I was lost in my thoughts when I heard Miyeon shuffling in her sleep. I looked at her as she slowly opened her eyes. She looked at me as she gave a small smile to me.

"Can't sleep? Something bothering you?" She asked as she drank some water. I slowly shook my head as a no as I placed my head on her shoulder. She slowly started patting my head in a soothing manner as I started speaking.

"I just can't grasp the situation fully yet. I am still processing. In a short amount of time a lot has happened. I just wish....it stays this way." I said that as I stared up at Miyeon. She looked down at me as she booped my nose making me whine lowly.

"I also wish that nothing more bad happens. Well on the bright side...mom, dad and Joshua will be here in LA till Sunday. They have a house here in LA. We can stay there. Now come on. Get some sleep. I will wake you up once the food comes." I shook my head at her words.

"Let's talk....order some coffee. Let's have some talk. I wanna catch up with you." I said that as I looked up at her. Miyeon smiled widely at my words as she immediately ordered coffee for us.

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

We just got of the plane. I stretched my body as me and Kevin waited for Miyeon to come. We three took a cab to our hotel. We had already booked a room for us. We were staying in the same room....Miyeon said that it's the safest this way for now. Incase something at night happens we will be there for each other to protect us.

"Kev...can you order something sweet for me?" I said that as I was doing my night routine. Kev looked at me as he sighed.

"Y/N...we're about to go to sleep. Do you have to eat something sweet?" I nodded my head eagerly as he shook his head while getting to the telephone.

Once the food came. I shared some of it with Miyeon and Kev. I brushed my teeth after eating as I went to bed.

"Can we get myself a phone or something? I would need it anyways." I said that as I was getting my bed ready. I saw how Miyeon nodded her head.

"We will get a MacBook for you. Mom already transferred some money in Kevin's account. We can go there tomorrow."

🐾The next day🐾

I wore a a pair of shorts with a crop top and a pastel colour cardigan on top. Me and Miyeon headed out as Kevin was getting ready.

As we reached the mall I immediately went in the store.

"Are we only gonna buy a MacBook for me?" I said as I look at Miyeon and Kevin. Kevin shook his head as he came beside me.

"We're gonna get ourselves a phone. We will get new sims for both of us same goes to your once we buy a phone for you. For now a MacBook should do..."

"But won't I need a phone to use a MacBook? I can't use my old iCloud account." I looked at Miyeon with a questionable gaze.

"Oh...you're right. Let's also buy a phone for you." I clapped my hands as we started looking for a phone.

After we were done shopping we went to a nice restaurant which was in the mall.

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

It was Sunday today. We three went to the airport to pick up mom, dad and Joshua.

As were were waiting for them I saw a familiar figure coming out of the airport.

"Shua! Here!" I heard Miyeon scream on top of her lungs.

The figure who was supposedly Joshua looked at us as he went back inside. In a while he came back outside with mom and dad.

My eyes immediately welled up with tears as I ran towards my dad and hugged him.

"Look at you. All grown up." He said that as he caressed my hair in a loving manner. I broke the hug as I looked at my mom.

"Why have you grown so tall? You're taller then me now. And were you not eating anything. Look how thin you've become." She kept going on as I just hugged her. Breaking the hug I looked at Joshua as he opened his arms.

I immediately went and hugged him as he caressed my back. "Gosh...peaches. You're still a cry baby."

"How can I not cry?! I missed you so much when I was in Korea. Especially at that time." We both broke the hug as Miyeon was with mom and dad.

Kevin and Joshua hugged each other as we all went and sat in the car.

"Y/N do you wanna eat some food before going home?" I heard mom ask from the front seat. I shook my head as I just wanted to go home and rest in my room there.

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

It has been a while since we all settled here in LA. My life here was getting better. I got into a good university with Kevin's help. I was starting to get more comfortable with Miyeon then I was before.

You can also say that I might have a potential boyfriend. We have not started dating yet because of my past trauma but he was okay with it. He was okay to wait for me which I was glad about.

Right now me, Miyeon, Kevin, Joshua and Minhee were in this cafe we just found.

I was just sitting while listening to music when Kevin removed my headphones and screamed in my ear.

"What is wrong with you!" I screamed at him as I rubbed my ears. He just smiled at me as he started speaking.

"Go and order some drinks for us. You're the only one who is sitting here and doing nothing. All of us are busy doing work unlike you." I just glared at him as I kicked him under the table while standing up.

"Fine. What do you guys want?" I asked as I stood beside Minhee.

"Strawberry milkshake for me!" Miyeon said as she gave me her wallet.

"Americano for me and Caramel Java Chip Frappuccino for Kevin." I looked at Minhee as he stood up.

"I will come with you. You can't bring all of this on your own." He said that as I smiled shyly. Joshua saw me as he nudged both Miyeon and Kevin.

I just walked away from there as fast as possible knowing how they will tease me. I went to the front as I waited for someone to come and take our order.

In less then a minute a guy came out. He looked a bit older then us. He stared at me for awhile before he started speaking. Minhee must have noticed that as he protectively held his hand on my waist.

"Hi. What would you like to order?" The guy said as his eye's never left my face. I slowly went and stood beside Minhee trying to hide myself as much as possible.

"A strawberry milkshake, Two Americano's, one One Caramel Java Chip Frappuccino and what do you want Y/N." my attention immediately went to Minhee as I answered his question.

"Chocolate chip Frappuccino for me." I said as I held Minhee's hand more tightly.

We were told that they will come and serve our drinks to our table so we went back there.

I slowly sat down as I looked at Minhee "Did you also find that guy weird or was it just me?" Minhee gave me a nod as he took a seat beside me.

"Even I found him weird. Maybe it's just our mind playing games with us." After that till our order came we talked about some random things.

In a while the same guy came back to our table with our orders. The more I looked at him the more he looked familiar to me.

"Hi I am Eric and here is your order. Hope you guys enjoy it." As soon as I heard that name I started thinking more.

I have heard that name somewhere...where was it? Was it-

"Y/N? Yah!" I heard Miyeon yell as she kicked me under the table. I rubbed the part where she kicked me as I looked at her with a annoyed expression.

"Stop kicking me will you?" I said as I took my Frappuccino from Kevin's hand who was about to take a sip.

"What were you thinking about?? You looked so lost." Joshua said as he took a sip of his americano. I shook my head as I took a sip of my drink.

"That Eric guy...he looked oddly familiar to me. Even his name. It's as if I have seen him somewhere. I just can't recall where." I said as I started thinking again.

"It must be nothing. Your mind must be just playing games. Stop thinking about him."

"Maybe you're right..."

We all were just enjoying our time together. We didn't even realise that it was starting to get dark outside.

We immediately packed our things as we exited the cafe. As I was the last person to do so. I looked inside the cafe again to see that Eric guy staring at me.

I immediately exited the cafe after seeing that.

"It is her. I am sure of it. I even saw that Kevin guy with her and her sister. But the thing is...there was this dude with her. He was way to close to her for your liking."

"When are you coming? Till Monday? Okay. Yeah sure...I will keep an eye on her...Sunwoo don't worry."

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

It has been a few days since we went to that cafe. After that small incident I stopped going out a lot. Scared something might happen.

Whenever I went out it felt like I was being followed but I didn't see anyone. That's why I now always carry pepper spray with me. I make sure that it is with me.

I was in my room doing some of my university work when Joshua entered my room. I looked at him as I went back to what I was doing.

"Y/N~ can you do me a favour?" Joshua said as he sat down on my bed. I turned my chair towards him as I told him to go ahead.

"We're out of ramen. Can you go and bring some?? And also bring some ice cream? Please."

I sighed as I stood up while nodding my head. I have been locked up inside this room for way to long. Might as well go and do some work.

I went out of my room with him following me. 

"Do you only want ramen and ice cream?? Nothing else?" He nodded his head as I stepped out of the house. I put on my hoodie as I started walking ahead with my hands in my sweatpants pockets.

As I was getting close to the convenience store I felt like I was being followed again. I slowly turned my head around trying not to look suspicious as I saw a figure walking behind me.

I almost froze as I immediately recognised that figure. No it can't be....I removed my phone from my pocket acting as if I was changing the song.

I clutched the pepper spray in my hoodie pockets tightly as I entered the store.

I immediately called one of my university friends. Calling Minhee could put him in danger. I don't want that. She lives really close to the store so she can reach here in two minutes or so.

"Hey...um can you come to the convenience store near your house. I am there right now...yeah. Sure."

I went to the ramen section as I picked some of them. I put them in the basket I took on the way here as I went to get some ice cream.

As I was getting the ice cream I felt the presence beside me. I tried ignoring him but he held my hand when I put it in the fridge.

"Long time no see...puppy." I immediately froze when he started talking. I looked at him for a brief second as I pulled my hand away from him.

I took the ice cream as I went to the cashier but before I could get there Sunwoo stopped me and turned me around.

"I looked for you everywhere and this is where you came? Tell me how more dumb can you get."

He said that as he held my jaw and came close to my face. I immediately pushed him away from me.

"Stay away from me. I don't want anything to do with you! You ruined my life enough already. Please don't ruin it more. Just stay away..." I said those words as I rushed to the cashier.

The cashier saw my distressed face as he asked me if I was okay. I nodded my head and kept looking back. As soon as I got my stuff I left the store. I knew he was gonna follow me so I kept the pepper spray bottle close to me.

As I was walking I saw my friend, Erica coming in this direction. I immediately ran towards her as I hugged her tightly.

"Y/N? Hey. What happened? Why do you..." her voice trailed of as she saw a figure standing not so far away from us. As if she understood what happened she took my hand as we headed to my house.

She took the keys from my hand as she opened the door.

"Miyeon! Are you home?" Erica yelled as she took me to the couch. She went away and came back in less then a minute with a glass of water.

I took the glass in my hand but it kept on shaking so Erica took it and helped me in drinking water.

Soon we heard footsteps coming downstairs. I was still in shock so I didn't even care to look up. I brought my legs up to my chest as I stared at nothing.

"Y/N? What happened peaches?" I heard Joshua asking as he rushed towards me. He immediately sat beside me as he took me in his embrace.

I started crying in his embrace.

"Erica...what happened?"

"I don't know actually. She called me a while ago saying that she is being followed and told me to come to the convenience store. As I reached there she immediately ran up to and hugged me. She was shaking badly till I reached there. When I looked back there was a man standing there in all black. Taking the clue I immediately brought her here."

"I see...thank you for bringing her Erica. Why don't you stay here. I don't think it's safe for you to go out now."

As I calmed down till then everyone was already there. I slowly sat straight and brought my knees near my chest.

"He is back...Sunwoo is back." I said quietly but they heard it.

"Are you sure?" Joshua asked as he looked around to see everyone's faces.

"I am sure Shua. I saw him. He talked with me. I am scared. I am scared to be alone. I am scared to even step outside of this house."

My tears slowly rolling down my cheeks. Joshua again hugged me as he rocked me back and forth.

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

It has been a week or so since I had that encounter with Sunwoo. I was always in my room the entire time.

Minhee came to check up on me from time to time. I was thankful for that. I just wanted all of this to end.

Today was a bit different tho. Today was Miyeon's birthday. She wanted to go to this club which is near my university. I never really had any reason to go there until today.

I got dressed in a black short dress as I wore a pair of heels. I didn't want to go but because today is her birthday I decided to do what she wants.

It was already 8 pm. I went downstairs to see Miyeon and Joshua together. Kevin and Minhee were not in sight. I was about to ask them about Minhee when Joshua beat me to it.

"Minhee and Kevin both are in the car peaches. Come on. Let's get going." I nodded as we three exited the house.

🐾In the club🐾

"Why did I agree to this again?" I said as soon I entered the club. Miyeon just pushed me so that I can walk ahead.

"Have some fun. Relax and chill out a bit. You worry to much." I shrugged at Miyeon's words as I went to get myself a drink.

"We all are going to the VIP room. Come there once you get the drinks." I heard Kevin say as they all went ahead except for me and Minhee.

"So...how are you holding up?" Minhee asked as he waited for our drinks to arrive. I shrugged while looking around. "It's so so. I know that anything can happen so I still have my pepper spray with me." Minhee smiled at me as he ruffled my hair a bit.

As soon as the drinks arrived we headed towards the room. As we entered the room we saw the three of them doing...something. We just set the drinks on the table as they all took one for each.

🐾Few hours later🐾

"Miyeon stop drinking! Kevin stop whatever you're doing! Minhee Y/N! Help me. Come on guys. It's late already we have to go home- no Miyeon!" We all looked at Miyeon as she started puking.

I sighed as I went towards her and held her hair up. "Shua you clean her up. I will go and find someone who can clean this up." "Take someone with you" I shook my head as I headed outside "I will be fine. I will be back in no time!"

I exited the room as I looked for a staff who could clean all the mess we created. As I was looking around I saw a figure leaning against the wall towards the washroom. I was about to head back when I saw Eric in front of me.

I gulped as I looked at that figure again. I decided to go past him but he held my hand as he dragged me with him. Coming to a abrupt stop I saw Sunwoo in front of me. 

"Had fun puppy? Now how about you come back to me?" He said that as he rubbed his thumb on my lower lip. I sighed as I looked for a way to get out of this situation. "Eyes here puppy. I am speaking with you!"

"Why don't you just stay the hell away from me? What did I ever do to you!"

"I am like this because of you! It's all your fault I am obsessed!" I scoffed at his words as I moved my hair back.

"I never even talked with you! Hell I didn't even know you existed till you came in front of me that day!"

"That's the thing! You didn't do anything yet I am behaving like this crazed maniac! All you have to do is submit yourself to me! Do that and we can live happily!” He said all that as he kept coming close to me.

I took slow steps back. When I knew that Eric wasn't paying attention I immediately pushed him hard as I ran out of there.

I didn't even make it till my room when I was pulled somewhere. Before I could scream I was hit on my head with something heavy.

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

I woke up to my body hurting all over. I looked around but I couldn't see anything. My whole body was paining.

As I was trying to figure things out I heard the door open and close. I tried my best to stay calm but the minute the cloth was removed from my eyes my blood ran cold.

There stood Sunwoo in front of me with blood all over his clothes. I hoped that what I was thinking was not true.

"It looks like my puppy is awake now. Wanna know what I did with Miyeon? But I am afraid you will feel sick while hearing all of that. Why don't I just take you to her?" Before I could even respond he harshly held my wrist as he pulled me up.

Now looking down I saw how there were numerous cuts on my whole body. I was walking wherever Sunwoo was taking me.

He stopped in front of a room making me halt my steps. "I am telling you. All of this happened because of you puppy." As he said that he opened the door.

Fresh smell of blood hit my nose making me gag. I looked around in horror. Miyeon and Kevin were in this room. They both were badly injured. Injured might also be the wrong word. They looked dead.

"You can consider them dead at this point. They shouldn't have helped you to be fair. Face the consequences." My legs gave up on me as I fell down on the cold ground. Tears streaming down my face endlessly.

"Why...why are you doing this to me?" I lowly whispered as I looked at Kevin and Miyeon.

"I told you puppy. Do something unforgivable...then you face the consequences. Hell you ran away from me for months. Now get up. You would now also want to check up on your little lover boy. Eric took care of him. Hope he didn't do much damage to him and your brother."

Seeing that I had no signs of getting up myself he picked me up as he took me to another room. I kept staring at Miyeon and Kevin as tears didn't stop for a moment.

Sunwoo and I entered the room. I gasped as I saw Eric making cuts on Minhee. As soon as Sunwoo put me down I was ready to run towards him when Sunwoo held my hand again.

"Where do you think you're going?" Sunwoo asked as he glared at me. "You will kill him! Stop it. Please. I...I give up." I yelled as I kept on trying to break free from Sunwoo's grip.

"Y/N that is not how it works dear. To be fair...this guys life is in my hands." I heard Eric say as he walked towards us.

"You want me right? Please let them go at least. I will do anything, hmm? No more, plz.” I pleaded as I hoped these two will listen to me.

"No more." Sunwoo walked towards Minhee

"Y/N...I...I love yo.." before he could even finish his sentence Sunwoo shot him dead.

"Nooooo!" I yelled as my legs gave up on me.

"Why are you crying over him!? He is nothing to you! I should be the only one that should matter to you!" Sunwoo yelled as he came towards me.

"You...you killed him...you killed everyone I love. There is nothing left for me all because of you!" I yelled as I glared up at him.

"We will get that attitude out of you but before that.." he turned back as I followed his gaze. My eyes widened as I shook my head.

"Sunwoo...please no don't do it. I..." before I could even finish my words I heard the clicking of the gun and he shot him.

I screamed as I saw Joshua dead in front of me.

"You can't do this to me! Let me go please." I kept thrashing around in Eric's arm as he tried calming me down.

Seeing no response from Sunwoo I screamed more. Slowly my body started giving up and soon everything went dark.

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

I entered the room Y/N was in. I slowly put the first aid box down as I started treating her wounds trying not to wake her up.

After I was done I stared at her as I moved some strands of her hair away from her eyes.

"Why did you have to runaway? I thought we were doing good." I said as I looked at her sleeping figure.

Looking at her like this in this condition made me feel bad. I knew that she shouldn't go through this...but I can't live without her. She is everything I got.

Sighing I stood up and exited the room and locked it from outside. I stood outside the room as I was lost in my thoughts.

"Everything alright?" I turned my head to the voice and saw Eric coming out of his room. I merely nodded my head as I started walking downstairs.

"Now that you got Y/N...what will you do?"

"I...I will go back to Korea once she recovers. I wanna start new. I don't want her to be scared of me."

"She will come along...soon. I mean I hope she does."

🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾

I stared out of the window as I had nothing to do. I was to weak and hurt to escape right now and the door was locked.

Soon enough I heard the door unlocking as Sunwoo stepped inside.

"Hey...here. Your breakfast." He said as he kept the food in front of me. I pushed the food away from me as I heard him sigh.

"You haven't eaten anything since yesterday. Have some please. You're already weak." I shook my head at his words as he sat down in front of me.

"Puppy...don't make me mad. Eat this. Now." I stared at him for a bit as I took the plate in my hand and took a bite. "Eat everything. You will need some energy to argue with me."

After awhile I was done. I set the plate down as I took some sips of water.

"Y/N....once you're healed. We will go back to Korea. Everything is over. Only you and me. You don't need anyone else. I am all you will ever need now." As he said that he kissed my forehead and stood up.

Before he could exit I spoke up "You're a fucking maniac Kim Sunwoo...you're forcing your love on. I will never love you." I said as I wiped my cheeks.

He turned around as he spoke with his hands in his pockets "Call it whatever you want Forced Love or not...you're still mine. At the end of the day. I am everything you got puppy." He exited the room before I could reply.

Tears slowly started flowing down my eyes. I really am stuck with him now. There is no one who can help me out now.

———x———

Tagging: @deoboyznet