functionaldisaster - Mostly confused
Mostly confused

I'm definitely a mess, but I do get things done. Lived at least 21 years. Expect a bit of everything here. Not too active, uni's attempting to tear my head off. p.s. I'm broke, if you send a personal message asking for money it's a block on sight.

850 posts

In Exchange For A Bountiful Harvest, The Hive Is Safe. The Elder One, Smoke Bringer And Invulnerable

In exchange for a bountiful harvest, the hive is safe. The elder one, smoke bringer and invulnerable goliath, makes it so. A strange and unknowable being, it brings with it arcane artifacts and demands we sacrifice our honey, and in return it grants protection to the swarm

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More Posts from Functionaldisaster

2 years ago

[This idea has been rattling in my brain and I had to share it.]

I know we all love the ‘humans are space orcs’ concept… but imagine, onboard the new ship they’ve been assigned to, the human meets an actual space orc. A massive monster… fangs and tusks and scars and a battle-hardened stare, looming over all the other life forms on the ship in its thick indestructible armour it refuses to remove. It barely drinks, it doesn’t need sleep, its massive shoulders are heavy with the terrible things it has experienced. Compared to the squishy & delicate human body, this thing is a walking tank.

… Except instead of hating/ignoring one another, the human and the monster start bonding over both coming from death planets. The human is excited to find a life form who doesn’t quiver with fear at the vague description of a jellyfish and the monster is ecstatic to meet someone who understands the feeling of being bitten by a qua’lem (cats are pretty close). They sit together and compare dangerous animals and locations as the other aliens look on in confusion and fear… oh, you also have dense jungles of deadly hidden predators, boiling acid lakes, tamed predatory killers, and areas with horrendously high and low temperatures? Sick!! 

It doesn’t take long before the two of them become totally inseparable. The human loves not feeling like some kind of crazy outsider and the monster is overjoyed they’ve finally found an equal in this unkillable marshmallow.

Monster: When I was a youngling, a grol-lik stung straight through my armour. The pain lasted for approximately 16 human hours. Human: Oh yeah man, I get that. As a kid I got a wasp stuck in my shirt. It stung me like four times, it was awful, and all my cousins just laughed at me… Monster: [using their arm screen to research human courting methods] I see.

2 years ago
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2 years ago

That is masterful riding

Description: [A video of a woman riding a galloping horse bareback while holding a large rainbow flag.]

2 years ago
Its My Birthday Today So I Treated Myself To Some Thor Doodling. All Done Over The Past Two-ish Weeks.
Its My Birthday Today So I Treated Myself To Some Thor Doodling. All Done Over The Past Two-ish Weeks.
Its My Birthday Today So I Treated Myself To Some Thor Doodling. All Done Over The Past Two-ish Weeks.

it’s my birthday today so i treated myself to some thor doodling. all done over the past two-ish weeks. also just experimenting with drawing character design/outfit exploration!

2 years ago

Also War's armour being a mismatched collection of what we can suspect is throphies is also an amazing design choice.

Death's grimy hair doubling as a reaper's hood is peak character design.

You know what….I’d never actually considered that.

How has that not ever occurred to me???

Death's Grimy Hair Doubling As A Reaper's Hood Is Peak Character Design.

Art by Joe Maduriera


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