Aiwendil

Aiwendil

some pic I drew on February...I always post them on LOFTER and forgot I have Tumblr...(little dumb)

my Apollo looks like a mortal man cause now he's healing, he'll be much more big if he want show the power of a god.(maybe tall as 3 meter, even more. :)

An interesting parallel was revealed before me while listening to worship in my catholic school. It certanly helped me view one of my favourite songs in a different light.

(In advance, I feel it’s important to make clear that I’m not a christian. I once was, I’m not anymore. I’m however pretty confident talking about religious themes, due to my catholic upbringing and school. Hope everybody is fine with that.)

Let’s get into it.

A very well known song among christians is the worship song Oceans. If you never heard of it, or just not sure if we’re thinking of the same thing, here’s a video:

It’s a pretty clean example of a worship song. It references the story of Jesus walking on the water, and calling his disciples to follow his example, because the faith in him will keep them above the water and they won’t sink.

The singer calls out to the christian God, saying that their faith and trust in God will keep them similarly safe, that when fear comes and they need reassurance, the presence of God alone (their Saviour’s) will help them. Even when “oceans rise”, they can look above the waves. Because God is always there, he is always reliable, and knowing this, believing sets you free.

The singer also paint their relationship with God as an intimate one. “I am Yours, and You are mine”. Usually lovers say such things — but if you ask any christian, you will soon find out that the love God feels toward his children, and the love a christian feels to God goes even deeper and is more meaningful than the love between lovers. (Or so I’ve been told)

Why am I talking about all of this? Here comes one of the best songs ever written, Marian by The Sisters of Mercy.

If this isn’t the most beautiful song in existence then there is no real beauty at all

If you look at the lyrics, maybe you realise where this post is heading.

In Marian, the singer is singing to the mysterious Marian. It is a call of distress; the singer is “in a sea of doubt”. The image of the sea is used throughout the whole song. The singer is drowning in a metaphorical sea, their only hope is that Marian saves them. Quite a similars setup to Oceans, if you think about it.

Although the singer isn’t sure if Marian can see him struggling, they still trust them wholly, they believe Marian can save them from the horrors. Just as God can lift his followers when their feet fails. They hear Marian calling out their names, just as God calls out for his disciples (or his followers). There is complete trust in both cases, both God and Marian are presented as (somewhat) omnipotent.

It begs the question: is Marian God?

I don’t know. I don’t think that it matters. The personal beliefs of the members of The Sisters of Mercy are unknown for me, and I also don’t really care. Maybe Marian is God, maybe they’re not. You can interpret it as you want, that’s the beauty of art, it’s subjective. Personally I don’t think of Marian as God, but that’s really me.

What matters is the role Marian takes in this song. At first, one could say Marian is simply a love song. Technically would be right, but I think it’s a little bit of an understatement. The singer isn’t just in love in Marian — they look up to them, they adore them. They worship them. The singer is lost and weak, Marian is perfect and powerful (and very far away). If Marian isn’t God, then they’re still in a position usually reserved for gods.

The reason I talked about the love between christians and God is to illustrate the difference between “simple” romantic love and whatever the singer and Marian has going on. By treating Marian as a godly being, the love the singer feels for them is also elevated to a higher level. It’s more devoted, more complex, and one could say it’s also one-sided — although we never hear Marian’s side of things, they never come close enough for us to judge the nature of their feelings.

(This is a stark difference between the two songs, but it’s mainly due to the different themes. In Oceans, the focus is on God’s grace. In Marian, the focus is on the singers loneliness.)

So, to summarize, Marian was a worship song all along, and it took me attending a mass to realize this. Whether or not Marian is the God or just a personal god is up to preference, the song works either way. The keywords are trust, godly love and devotion.

I hope you enjoyed reading this post. I apologise for any grammatical/spelling mistakes, english isn’t my first language.

My take on that one gif people were redrawing as hannigram on twt

something I find really interesting about hannibal’s character is how he uses people’s expectations and ingrained assumptions to hide himself. no one suspects he’s a serial killer because he doesn’t present as one. he’s elegant and refined and isn’t cruel to animals. he’s highly sophisticated, a polyglot and has a deep admiration for beauty and life. he appreciates saving lives just as much as he appreciates ending them. in fact, this particular aspect of his character is partly why it takes will the entirety of s1 to accept hannibal’s true nature. will saw hannibal save abigail and accompany her to the hospital in apéritif and he also saw hannibal save a man’s life by performing emergency surgery and taking over the operation at the end of sorbet.

this moment in particular is interesting because of how it’s framed to make hannibal look almost godly from will’s point of view:

1) hannibal is positioned immediately higher than will due to being in the ambulance, meaning will is looking up at hannibal, while hannibal is looking down on him

2) hannibal is standing under a bright light as he works to save this guy’s life, while will is standing in almost complete darkness

3) the usual orchestral, classical music is playing in the background, emphasising the apparent “holiness” of the act and framing hannibal as some sort of saviour

the impact of this scene is even more potent when considering the context of the rest of the episode, since will has already stated that the ripper is not the type to save people or enact mercy on anyone. his style of murders doesn’t suggest this characteristic whatsoever, and although will’s assessment is correct, hannibal’s personality and overall demeanour doesn’t match what we’d imagine a person like that might look like. I think will is confronted by this as well, because even if hannibal’s surgical skill means he matches the ripper’s profile (which makes him a valid suspect) his actions contradict will’s image of the ripper, while simultaneously affirming it:

it’s difficult to reconcile these facets of hannibal’s character. it’s inherently contradictory and defies our cultural expectations. nonetheless, hannibal’s inclination to save people is sometimes more insidious than his murders. he doesn’t save people out of altruism, he does it because he thinks he’s superior and enjoys deciding outcomes. he doesn’t view himself as insane, he views himself as god. this is most aptly explored in takiawase, through the acupuncturist/beekeeper killer. here we see a murderer who confesses that she killed a man to quiet his mind, and tells jack that it’s beautiful that she managed to protect him and her other patients. this is one side of hannibal’s character, the one who’s a doctor and therapist and sees death as a cure from disease, even if the ‘disease’ itself is literally just discourtesy. it’s ultimately an act of power.

and yet in this same episode he flips a coin and saves bella on a whim. this of course is framed to others as an act of mercy, however the reality is he took bella’s power away in an act disguised as kindness. once again, he hides in plain sight. this is the other side of his character, and it’s just as deadly.

it’s still about power.

but we don’t associate acts of mercy with monstrosity. when hannibal comforts abigail in trou normand we question whether he’s as bad as we think, because what negative connotations are tied to paternal tenderness? we miss that hannibal is fostering dependency, that he literally looks dead in the eyes as he holds her, and that he blatantly just told us that he’s using abigail to manipulate will:

hannibal often does this actually. he either directly says what he’s doing or suggests that he’s the culprit (often through cannibal puns, as we know) but no one ever interprets him correctly because doing so would contradict the image he’s carefully constructed for himself. it would cause too much dissonance.

and what’s fascinating is that on a subtextual level this is largely what the show is about. the story is an exploration of societal roles and the struggle to fit into stiff categorisation and expectations. will parallels hannibal in this regard because he’s desperately trying to repress his identity by taking on certain roles. and the audience is lured by this persona the same way the characters are lured by hannibal because will defies our understanding of certain tropes. on a genre level, will assumes the detective archetype, meaning we are primed to think he’s inherently good. when we see him say he wants to save people we believe him, even though he often only does so to prove to himself that he’s a good person. will is indeed righteous, a characteristic we often view positively, however he’s violent, wrathful and actively enjoys murder due to how powerful it makes him feel. he’s not dissimilar to hannibal, we just don’t see this straight away because doing so would disrupt our understanding of good and evil.

will hides the same way hannibal does, except will hides from us as well

jesus christ could you get any gayer