Okay Yuri Experts I Need Help

Okay yuri experts I need help

What does she mean by this?

My childhood trauma didn't make me stronger. it made me a people pleaser. it made me forgive way too much. it made me not speak when i'm supposed to. it made me an extreme empath.

I'm willing to risk it

something i never see anyone talk about is how lonely autism can be. not because we don’t fit in or whatever, but because our love languages are so fundamentally different from the rest of the world.

i won’t always hear it when someone tells me they love me. i won’t always understand it when someone shares a kindness with me. sometimes it hurts to be touched. sometimes i interpret genuine care as mocking or insincere because i’ve been burnt so often, and i have no way of knowing otherwise.

when i spend time in my room engaging in interests i enjoy, but i leave the door open to let my friends come in and out and interrupt as they please, that’s love. when i send someone a long ramble about something i care about, that’s love. when i let someone hug me, that’s love. when i try a food even though it’s not a safe food, because my friend made it and is very proud of it, that’s love. when i take the time to tell you when i need space and that i’ll come back when im able, that’s love.

i don’t think people hear me when i tell them i love them. i don’t know if i can hear others when they say it either. i feel very alone most of the time, like there’s a glass barrier between me and the rest of the world. i can see them mouthing, i love you, i love you, but how can i believe them? they’re nowhere near me. no warmth and no life in it.

Neurotypical Person: "Just talk to people. Stop being afraid of rejection. The only way you'll fail is if you don't even try. Have some confidence."

Autistic Person: (asks whatever questions they can think of from a prepared list and the conversation ends up being awkward and forced)

Autistic Person: (infodumps about their special interest and gets labeled as annoying)

Autistic Person: (comments on something they observe and gets labeled as judgmental)

Autistic Person: (approaches random people in random places, not realizing that there are some places where people don't expect to be approached, and gets threatened)

Autistic Person: (talks to someone, misses a subtle cue that they want to be left alone, and gets labeled as disrespectful of boundaries)

Autistic Person: (tries to join someone's conversation and gets labeled as an eavesdropper)

Autistic Person: (teases someone as a joke because they've seen that that's how a lot of people interact with each other, not realizing that they don't have enough of a connection with this person to do that, and gets labeled as mean)

Autistic Person: (tries to talk to someone who's already talking to someone else and gets labeled as rude for interrupting, and waiting until they're alone to avoid interrupting isn't an option because that rarely ever happens)

Autistic Person: (approaches someone or faces in their general direction while trying to think of what to say to them, and gets labeled as a creep for hovering or staring)

Autistic Person: (talks to someone too often and gets labeled as clingy)

Autistic Person: (talks to someone, by some miracle it works and this person actually enjoys the conversation, but now they have to do it again and again and again, and they eventually run out of things to talk about or do something wrong)

Autistic Person: "I don't get it. I talked to people. I did exactly what I was told to do. And I didn't say anything sexual, anything gross, anything about death, or anything else that would be considered 'obvious'. But it didn't work. It can't be because I did something wrong, because I followed the advice exactly and so many people insisted that that's all I have to do. There must be something wrong with me. Maybe I'm just unattractive."