This Took Way Longer Than Expected

This took way longer than expected

Faces of Hachi

I wanna go back to a minute ago when I didn’t understand this

And then he exploded

Soundwave doesn't really have a face so I made this bonus image to really convey the subtle emotion I was going for

...

end me

Tinky about Ted lmao <3

based on this post:

Kobeni from Chainsaw Man is a D&D Fighter

Okay yeah crazy people make dumb shit in D&D all the fuckin’ time, you can just say what the fuck on the internet. Some idiot made an article on how to play Cyberpunk Edgerunners characters in D&D what’s the big deal?

The big deal is that the D&D Fighter isn’t really…well represented in actual fiction. Controversial take, I know, but most uh…most mundane characters in fiction don’t really fit the bill of ‘Only good at combat but in a mostly superficial way that’s completely outclassed by the real shit of the setting’.

They’re not this:

This unique blend of…hell on earth that just isn’t present in actual fiction. One could say completely fucking unplayable. For those not in the know, this is D&D 3.5′s iteration of Fighter. For those who play 5e, this is basically the widely-mocked Champion Fighter subclass.

They’re proficient with all simple weapons, all martial weapons, all armor, and all shields including tower shields. They also have the following class skills: Climb (Str), Craft (Int), Handle Animal (Cha), Intimidate (Cha), Jump (Str), Ride (Dex), and Swim (Str)…with a grand total of 2 + Intelligence bonus skill points per level. That’s right, if you’re a Fighter of Average intelligence, you get to be okay in…2 skills.

And their saves are atrocious. If something even slightly scary shows up, the average Fighter is shitting themselves and running for the fucking hills.

This is obviously wildly fucking unrepresentative of any character in fantasy fiction. Too many demonstrate the ability to do more than just fight, and the characters who are famous for focusing on fighting are in series where being good at fighting means you can cut mountains in half or blow up the moon. And they’re all so…brave. Immune to fear even.

Enter God’s Chosen Failwoman

She’s a Public Safety Devil Hunter from the hit manga Chainsaw Man. She does this because her family made her, and it was either killing devils or prostitution.

Kobeni is a massive coward and in the first arc she’s introduced in with The Eternity Devil, she’s all too willing to simply kill Denji and give his heart up. When something scary is happening, Kobeni is the first to coward out.

Kobeni also isn’t very skilled. She quits public safety to go work fast food, and she can barely do that. Fast Food, literal entry level positions in this hellish system we call an economy.

And yet, something curious.

When it comes to completely normal, completely mundane, completely comprehensible violence, Kobeni is unphased, and is insanely good at it. Sure, her partner got shot, but her reaction was to simply kill the shooter

and then go find the perpetrators

And when confronted by a frankly mundane demon attack, it doesn’t even touch her:

She’s also good enough with that knife, which for all intents and purposes is a completely mundane kitchen knife to slice clean through bone:

It’s groundbreaking. I’ve searched far and wide, but I’ve never found a character in fiction who perfectly lines up with everything that D&D 3.5 and even core Pathfinder 1e Fighter sets out to emulate. Someone who’s only good at violence, who’s insanely good with only one weapon, but can never break out of being completely mundane with their violence. Who, no matter how strong they get, how hard they work, is only human, with entirely human limits.

Here’s how you build Kobeni.

You need a high Strength and Dex. You need to be a Human. You need Weapon Finesse. You need to take Weapon Focus and Weapon Specialization, the full featline, with whatever knife of your choice (Weapon Focus, Weapon Specialization, Greater Weapon Focus, Greater Weapon Specialization, Melee Weapon Mastery). Take Lighting Reflexes. Take Light Armor Specialization.

Hell, if you want to more closely emulate how Kobeni functions, take the Combat Focus featline, which puts you into a sort of battle trance once you make a successful attack that lasts for about 10 rounds, which gives a bonus to will saves and other effects. Effects you can only get in Combat.

And guess what? You’ll be getting the genuine Kobeni experience. Being only good at completely mundane violence in a world that dramatically ramps up in stakes and moves past you.

hello sam nation. i have not played the smoke room yet ❤️