Hi Guys I Just Want To Say That I Am So Appreciative Of Every Single One Of You Who Has Interacted With

hi guys I just want to say that I am so appreciative of every single one of you who has interacted with any of my posts. seriously. i really really am. it feels amazing to know that you’ve heard some of my words and liked them enough to heart or reblog them. and it makes me feel much less lonely and much more connected. thank you guys I love you so much and hope you’re all doing well

thinking about the dichotomy of being a queer woman who fits into neither the feminine nor masculine category. the clear privilege I have when I am embodying a more feminine presentation and am therefore straight-passing. then the fear I experience when I align my appearance with a more masculine presentation and I know that this makes me appear more outwardly gay. the sort of imposter syndrome I have…like can I really claim oppression and voice my experiences with micro aggressions and homophobia as a queer woman when I can also adjust my appearance to appear straight and avoid those things? I have been dwelling on this idea of gender expression and the ways in which my presentation effects peoples treatment of me, but I find it important for me to say that no matter how you express your sexuality or gender identity outwardly, you are still valid in your experiences with oppression and hate. You can both acknowledge that you may have privilege within your queerness while also acknowledging that your identity as a non-straight or non-cis person makes you inherently hold less privilege than straight and cis individuals. anyways…

guys pls help me!!!

okay I really like this girl. buttttt…I’m not sure if she’s straight or not!!

tips on how to approach that question or how to figure out whether or not she likes girls without making it awkward?!

Olivia Rodrigo was so real when she said:

I think boygenius’ dynamic as a whole but in particular Lucy Dacus’ music is so beautiful because it depicts friendship with a level of genuine love that I find western society (and arguably the majority of cultures) undervalues so constantly we often forget it exists. Next to no other artists write songs about friendship which play like love songs in the way her music does.

I have a highly complicated relationship with almost everything in life, but most especially with my creativity. I have such a deep, desperate need to create. Every single day without fault I am brought to tears by the idea that my voice will never be heard. It is not that I feel particularly special or that I believe that I deserve to have a voice, but it simply saddens me so much to see a life for myself without that happening. looking at my favorite artists and the ways in which they’ve been able to impact and connect with others through their creations has been the fuel for this ravenous need of mine to create. However, it is not enough for me to just create. I must create something that transcends all expectations. I must make something so impactful, so special, and so meaningful that it tops anything I could have imagined. I need my work to be perfect. It has to be that good because it’s made by me. If my work is not to be tainted by my own hands, then it must be made to be so perfect that not a trace of me is left within it. Of course, this mindset of mine is detrimental to the art itself. Perfectionism, perfectionism. I cannot make something perfect, so I will not make something at all. It is absolutely stupid, and yet this is a constant looming feeling that I cannot escape. And of course, my depression and anxiety create further difficulties for my creativity. I have this pressing, urgent, desperate need to create something so beautiful…and yet, I cannot bring myself to get out of bed and put my hands to work. I believe, somehow, that I have something that I need to say…and yet, I hesitate to share any of my words and I find it immensely difficult to believe any of my work to be worthy in comparison to those already in existence. It feels as though I am a shell. I was born to be an artist and I feel that pressure constantly, yet it feels as though every factor of my existence is working against my ability to create. I feel something just beneath the surface, an eruption of ideas and words waiting to be expressed, but I’m not quite confident that I hold the artistic abilities to translate them effectively. It feels as though someone with more talent and motivation could have been given my brain, and they could have really made something of it. It is a crushing feeling, one that weighs me down more as each day passes.