Anyone Else Have Head-canons About The Voices From Slay The Princess?

Anyone else have head-canons about the voices from slay the princess?

Like, The Contrarian is bisexual, ofc he is

The mf is called The Contrarian you think he’s NOT gonna be somewhat queer? No. Cuz, contrary to popular belief, he likes dudes!

The Cold is gay, but by default hates everyone, even himself (His voice is hot tho-)

The Smitten is probably a little queer, but nobody wants to gaf about him (He’s like the annoying younger sibling)

The Cheated is homophobic probably or REALLY in denial

The Skeptic and Stubborn are best friends

The Paranoid is terrified of taking chances on anything, but if it aids in survival, he’s dammed if he doesn’t sure as hell try

The Hunted def got some intrusive thoughts

The Broken and The Paranoid talk about how depressed they are with each other like the best buds they are

The Hero very low-key hates being the one to make decisions, but as soon as The Contrarian is there, it feels kind of like he’s being relieved of it just a bit bc he makes outright ridiculous statements, catching The Narrator really off guard

And then The Narrator is tired, just trying to keep up with everything happening around him

Sorry for double posting but APPARENTLY those commission scammers have showed up on Tumblr at least for the first time for me.

For those who don’t know what I am talking about, there were/are commission scams going on in Instagram and even places like Artstation where people would pretend to be interested in your work and try to commission a pet or portrait for the sake of trying to get your bank details. Here’s how to (somewhat) sniff them out:

1- They don’t seem to be an average customer/ person that would be involved in your fandom, or has a blank template for an account or don’t even follow you.

2- They ask you to draw a portrait or a pet picture either for themselves or their children/family.

3- They promise to overpay you (in the hundreds) and do not listen to you even if you firmly state the price is cheaper.

4- They are constantly asking for your email name, or private details regarding things like banking details or passwords or other private information others should not know.

5- They try and over reassure you they mean no harm, try to guilt you into giving them the info, or become aggressive over you not giving them what they want.

What should you do if you come across one of these guys? My best advice is to block and report. Sadly these people jump account to account so there isn’t really much to do other than spread this info to prevent artists from being scammed.

the hill me and the mutuals are dying on

Hank J Wimbleton is a fucking Sleep Token fan, prove me wrong

Like

“My love, did I mistake you for a sign from god? Or are you really here to cast me off?”

“I’m a waking hell, and the gods grow tired.”

But I’m also projecting a little, I love Sleep Token

Slay the Princess ending??? Someone tag Black Tabby games /j

Chapter III: The Indomitable Human Spirit

The Narrator: Your on a path in the woods. And at the end of that path is a cabin. And in the basement of that cabin is a princess. You don’t need to slay her. Just turn around and leave.

(Options)

(Leave)

(No, I wanna slay the princess, that’s the point)

(Proceed up the path to the cabin)

(Why can’t I slay her?)

Part A:

(Leave)

The Narrator: You turn your back opposite of where the cabin sits, and you begin to walk.

Hero: Where are we walking exactly? Is there anywhere else to go?

The Narrator: Your going home.

Hero: Yeah, that’s pretty obvious. But…where is home?

The Narrator: Far away from here, I can tell you that. (Laugh)

Hero: Right.

The Narrator: Look at it this way, there was no harm done to you or the princess.

Hero: Mhm.

Part B:

(No, I wanna slay the princess, that’s the point)

The Narrator: That is not your job. Your job is to turn around, and leave.

Stubborn: Come on. Let us at least have a stab at her.

Hero: I mean, at least one? We can’t be sure if we need to leave.

Stubborn: Yeah. At least one. Right into her heart!

The Narrator: No. You’re leaving. There will be no stabbing.

Stubborn: C’mon, just once.

Hero: We can at least try?

The Narrator: Fine. You proceed up the path to the cabin.

(Walking)

(The cabin comes into view)

Hero: Great. Let’s go into the cabin now.

The Narrator: Since when were you the one telling me what to do?

(Options)

(Proceed into the cabin)

The Narrator: You proceed into the cabin.

(In the cabin)

The Narrator: (yapping abt the interior, it’s normal, just take it that way) The only furniture of note is a table, on that table is a pristine blade.

Stubborn: Great! Our trusted weapon.

Hero: Here we go…

(Options)

(Grab the blade)

(Proceed into the basement)

The Narrator: You grab the pristine blade.

(Proceed into the basement)

The Narrator: You walk down the steps, and they creak under your feet. If the princess lives down here, slaying her will probably be doing her a favor. But then, you gaze upon…the princess.

(It shows the princess, she’s not facing the player)

The Narrator: Her back is turned to you. And she seems to be heavily breathing.

Stubborn: She’s the perfect companion for combat! Do you hear her breathing? She’s hungry for blood!

Hero: How can you tell? She’s…not looking at us…why isn’t she looking at us?

The Narrator: I don’t know.

(Options)

(Call out to her)

The Narrator: You call out to the princess. She turns. Her face is dripping with blood. You notice her cheeks are torn open.

Hero: Ohhhh no. No no no no no. Okay. We can go. We can leave. Please?

Stubborn: Seems she’s already claimed her first victim. Let’s be the second!

(Stab her in the back)

The Narrator: You slowly approach her, your steps silent on the ground.

Stubborn: And…NOW!

The Narrator: As you launch yourself at the princess, she swiftly turns around and your blade plunges into her hand. She rips it from your grasp. Blood cascades down her arm as she stares at you. Her face is covered in blood, her cheeks have huge gashes in them.

The Princess: You…why are you here?

(Options)

(I’m here to…save you)

(I’m here to slay you)

(Silence)

The Princess: You can’t save me, I don’t need saving.

The Narrator: Her words are sharp and her gaze is angered.

Stubborn: Why would you lie?

Hero: I…I don’t know…

(Options)

(Well…I’m here to slay you)

The Princess: You can’t slay me either. You’re stuck. You need to leave. I never want to see your face again.

The Narrator: She spits the words at you with an urgency. The holes in her cheeks makes her speech slightly slurred.

Hero: But…that doesn’t make sense. Why—

Stubborn: If we’re stuck, one of us will have to die!

(Options)

(Leave)

(Attack her again)

The Narrator: You reach for your blade in her hand, and she yanks it away from you.

The Princess: Please, you’re making a mistake! You need to go!

The Narrator: She’s bloody and she’s dangerous. Listen to her warning. Leave.

Stubborn: C’mon. She’s just projecting weakness.

(Options)

(Leave)

(Leave)

(Leave)

(Leave)

(Leave)

(Attack her again)

(Leave)

(Leave)

The Narrator: (Sigh) You reach for the blade again, this time she doesn’t fight back, and you have the blade in your grasp again. She opens her arms as you stab her chest.

The princess: (Laughs) It’s not going to work.

Hero: Wait what?

Stubborn: She’s- She’s bluffing, stab her again!

The Narrator: No matter how many times you try to stab the princess, she doesn’t budge. She basks in the bloody glory of her wounds.

The princess: You will never kill me. I. Am. Indomitable.

The Narrator: There is a single loud snap. Everything goes dark, and you die.

Part C:

(Why can’t I slay her?)

The Narrator: Because she doesn’t need to be slain.

Skeptic: Who says?

The Narrator: I say. I say she can’t be slain.

Skeptic: She’s just a princess. What harm can she do?

The Narrator: A lot. It’s not your job to dictate whether or not she’s a threat.

Hero: What if she’s a bigger threat than we think?

The Narrator: Well, that’s one way to think of it. Either way, you’re going to leave.

Skeptic: I say we take her head on. How much can she really do, huh?

The Narrator: No. I’m not arguing this with you. We are leaving.

Hero: I say we leave, yeah?

Skeptic: Where are we leaving to? That’s the question.

The Narrator: Somewhere far from here. Very far.

Hero: That doesn’t help.

Skeptic: Do you want to leave or not?

Hero: Fine!

Part D:

(Proceed up the path to the cabin)

The Narrator: You ignore my pleas and walk straight up the path toward the cabin. What are you doing?

Hero: Going to face her, I guess.

The Narrator: (the interior of the cabin is the same) The only furniture of note is a table, on that table is- Nothing? Where’s the blade?

Contrarian: Threw it out the window. Figured we didn’t need it.

The Narrator: Wh- Damn you!

Contrarian: What? You’re the one who didn’t wanna slay her in the first place.

Hero: Well, we kind of needed it this time.

Contrarian: Well, too bad.

(Options)

(Proceed down into the basement)

(Search for the blade)

The Narrator: You open the door and step down into the basement. The walls feel cold, and the steps are rough. If the princess lives down here, slaying her is probably doing her a favor. Suddenly, you hear her cries.

The Princess: PLEASE! PLEASE! LET ME DIE! PLEASE!

Contrarian: Jeez. That’s not something you hear everyday. Or want to hear everyday.

Hero: Definitely not.

The Narrator: You step down the last step, and gaze upon the princess. Her face is drenched with blood, it runs down her neck, and it soaks her dress. She stops yelling.

The Princess: Are you…are you here to kill me?

The Narrator: Her voice reeks of desperation.

(Options)

(No, I’m not)

Hero: Let’s just be honest. She deserves the truth.

The princess: THEN LEAVE! NOW!

Contrarian: Tell her to stop yelling! I’m gonna go deaf!

(Yeah, I am)

The Princess: With what weapon?

Hero: Now that’s tough.

Contrarian: Whoops.

The Princess: WITH WHAT WEAPON!? ANSWER ME PLEASE!

The Narrator: The Princess sobs. She’s anxious for your answer.

(Options)

(With no weapon)

The Princess: No…no weapon?

The Narrator: You and the princess stare at each other.

The princess: FINE! I’ll take it. Just…end my suffering…please.

The Narrator: You come up to the princess, and wrap your hands around her neck. Hesitantly, you squeeze. The princess cracks a smile as she chokes.

Contrarian: This is way too violent for me. I was…I didn’t…

Hero: Just let it happen.

The Narrator: As the air leaves her lungs, your grip loosens. She falls to the floor at your feet.

Contrarian: Holy shit.

(It ends w/ the player leaving the cabin)

Monster fucker this, monster fucker that. What if I want a monster RELATIONSHIP huh?! Monster HAND HOLDING, monster INTIMATE CONVERSATIONS, monster COMFORTABLE SILENCE??