I Cant Do This Anymore

i cant do this anymore

i am thinking so many thoughts

Chapter 3: Bonfire

(Y/N Perspective)

Before I know it, it’s nighttime and the boys are starting the bonfire. Lighting it up, all of us grabbing a glass of Gallys special recipe and sitting down with our friends having a laugh. It’s bonfire nights that I love the most for quite obvious reasons. Having a night like this where we can all just chill and relax feels great. I’m sure it feels better for the other boys because it feels like most of my time during the day is down time. I’m doing the same thing every day and few Gladers come to the med-jack hut anyway.

I’m sitting next to the Greenie with Newt on the other side of us, eating dinner. The bonfire illuminating an orange hue around us None of us really say anything for a bit and focusing on our food instead. That’s until Newt speaks up.

“Hell of a first day, Greenie,” Newt looks at the Greenie while he gives a little nod.

“Here,” Newt picks up the glass filled with Gallys special drink and hands it too him. “Put some hair on your chest,” I give Newt a look as to say what are you doing. Gallys drink is very strong, no one know what’s in it and it taste like klunk. But it’s better than nothing. The Greenie looks a bit hesitant at first but grabs the glass and take a big sip, only to spit it out. Me and Newt look at each other as I let a giggle, and he chuckles. It might be a bit mean but still funny.

“Oh, my God, what is that?” the Greenie questions and passes the glass back to Newt.

“I don’t even know,” says Newt.

“Its Gallys recipe, it’s a trade secret,” I say as Newt turns around and looks at Gally wrestling some of the Gladers, just like every other bonfire night. The boys never seem to get bored of it.

“Yeah, well, he’s still an asshole.”

“He saved your life today. Trust me, the Maze is a dangerous place.” Newt says and we all look out at the closed door and listen to the sounds of the grievers.

“We’re trapped here, aren’t we?”

“That’s until we find a way out, hopefully sooner rather than later,” Newt and the Greenie look at me, but I keep my eyes concentrated on the door.

“But” We all turn out heads around, “you see those guys, there, by the fire? Those are the runners. And that guy in the middle there, that’s Minho. He’s the keeper of the runners. Now every morning when those doors open, they run the Maze, mapping it, memorizing it, trying to find a way out.”

“How long have they been looking?” asks the greenie. “Three years,” the shock on the Greenies face is not hard to miss. Every time someone comes up from the box they hear the same things, and most of the time have the same reaction. Coming up in a random box surrounded by a bunch of boys only to find out that their stuck in here, it’s a pretty shit thing to hear.

“And they haven’t found anything?”

“It’s a lot easier said than done, listen” Newt raises his finger in the air, and we all sit there listening to the walls of the maze changing. “Hear that? That’s the Maze changing, it changes every night,” Another shocked look from the Greenie.

“How is that even possible?”

“You can ask the people who put us in here if you ever meet the bastards. Listen, the truth is, the runners are the only ones that really know what’s out there. They’re the strongest and the fastest of us all, and it’s a good things too because if they don’t make it back before those doors close, then they’re stuck out there for the night. And no one has ever survived a night in the Maze,” As per usual this topic of conversation doesn’t sit too right with the Greenies, but this ones special. He seems to be taking it a lot better than most, even after the stunt he pulled today. Walking up the doors of the maze is a ballsy move.

“What happens to them?”

“Well, we call them Grievers. Of course, no one’s ever seen one and lived to tell about it. But they’re out there.”

“Well this has turned depressing hasn’t it,” I say. I decide that this is the best time to maybe catch up with some of the other boys.

“You’re acting as if you don’t hear me say the same thing every month,” Obviously he’s right but maybe I don’t feel like hearing much more, I already know how the Maze and the Glade works.

“Doesn’t mean it isn’t depressing, I’m going to go. I’ll talk to you guys later, yeah?” I say right before I start walking off.

“I have a question for you,” says the Greenie. “What’s Up.” I answer.

“Why are you the only Girl in here, I’ve been keeping an eye out all day for another girl and I’ve yet to spot another one,” I should have seen it coming. I glance at Newt who is also waiting for the answer.

“Uhm, I don’t know why I’m the only girl. I wish I knew though, being the only girl surrounded by boys isn’t my favourite thing ever, but I guess I didn’t really have a choice.”

He nods. Thankfully, he doesn’t have any follow up questions. “Well, I’m going to go, see you guys around,” I say, and they nod their heads goodbye and I walk over to the other boys. I talk to some of them while we watch Gally fight some other boys, then I notice Newt and the Greenie get up.

I watch them as they walk around, and Newt starts pointing out the other boys and what their jobs are. Jeff and Clint walk past the other 2 boys and then Newt points at me, probably explaining that us 3 are med-jacks. They continue talking until one of the boys that Gally was fighting bumps into the Greenie almost making him fall over.

Gally looks at him “What do you say Greenie? Wanna see what you’re made of?” One of the boys start chanting, “Greenie, Greenie,” and the rest of the boys join in.

I stand up and join he circle that the boys are forming. I hate when Gally challenges a Greenie to fighting, but it’s almost impossible not to watch this all go down. I’m still never impressed with Gally’s antics.

“Okay. All right. The rules are simple, Greenie. I try to push you out of the circle. You try and last more than five seconds,” Gally says being a bastard as always. The other boys laugh. “Ready,” Gally pushes the greenie out the circle, but Zart and some other boys push him back in. Gally grabs him and throw him onto the ground. “Come on, Greenie. We’re not done yet,” says Gally.

“Stop calling me Greenie.”

“Stop calling you that? What do you wanna be called? Shank?” Everyone laughs. “What do you think, boys? Does he look like a shank?” The greenie makes a run towards Gally in an attempt to push him over, but Gally grabs onto him and pushes him back down into the ground. He gets back up.

“You know what? I think I’ve settled on shank.” Gally is nearing the edge at this point to the Greenie makes another attempt to push him out. But Gally grabs onto to him and pushes him back instead. The greenie lets go of Gally and pushes him into the ground. Pretty impressive if I do say so myself. Embarrassing Gally though, maybe not the best idea but what else could he do. I’m looking around the crows and my eyes land on Minho, and even his face shows that he impressed. The Greenie gets back up.

“Not bad for a greenie, huh?” and right as the boy finishes his sentence, Gally kicked his leg which made him fall straight back onto the ground and seems to hit his head pretty hard. All the other boys are cheering.

The greenie whispers something to himself. He gets up “Thomas. Hey. Thomas!” We all look at him pretty confused. “I remember my name. I’m Thomas!” Everyone starts surrounding him and cheering. I stand back a bit and cross my arms with a smile on my face. Me and Newt lock eyes and we smile to each other. I see through the cracks of the boy’s head and see him take another sip of moonshine, this time swallowing it. And then Gally congratulating him.

A loud screeching sound can be heard from the Grievers, and we all look over to the door, as if it’s about to burst through and kill us all. It goes silent again until Thomas speaks up. “What the hell was that.”

“That, my friend, was a Griever. Don’t worry. You’re safe here with us. Nothing gets through those walls,” Gally says.

“All right, guys. Let’s tuck it in for the night. Come on. It was a good night,” says Alby.

I start walking back over to our hammocks to go to bed, and then I feel a tap on my shoulder and turn around to see Newt. “Good night, huh.”

“Yeah, I guess so. But you should tell Gally to stop challenging the Greenies. I know you guys love it but were supposed to be welcoming towards them, not scare them,” I say to Newt.

“Aww come on! It’s just a bit of fun,” Newt says while giving me a smirk. I smile back at him.

“Fun and intimidating are not the same thing, Newt.”

“Don’t worry about, Thomas was fine tonight. Y’know there’s never any real damage.”

“I guess so,” We make it back to homestead and I say goodnight to Newt before heading over to my hammock and getting it in my hammock before falling into a peaceful sleep.

Tags:@honethatty12

Sorry this took me so long to get out, I honestly don’t even know what happened. Also, so thankful that I never have to write the word Greenie ever again. Also not edited sorry for any mistakes

Chapter 2: Greenie

(Y/N’S Perspective)

I was sitting around in the med-jack hut doing nothing. It was greenie day, and I was waiting for here those blaring sirens, so we all know the new greenie was on his way. Plus, a bunch supplies that the Gladers needed. I loved greenie days mostly for the fact that she knew there would be more supplies waiting in the box for her. I’d had given up ages ago on hoping for a girl to come up, even though a little part of me was always hoping a girl, it never was, and I had to accept that (whether or not it frustrated me.)

Then as if on cue those sirens started. I jumped right out of her seat and followed Jeff and Clint to the box. Once I made it over, I found herself next to Newt and gave him a smile. We’ve been close ever since his accident in the maze. He knows she doesn’t care about the greenie and just wants to see what supplies have been brought up.

The buzzer blares and Gally opens the box. Everyone looks inside to see the greenie. If I’m being honest, I’ve always felt quite bad for the greenies that come up. All your memories gone, you don’t know where the hell we are, and I don’t blame them for having questions but sometimes it just gets a bit too much. Luckily, it’s not my job to show the greenie around and hear all the questions. Unlucky for Alby, because that’s his job as first-in-command I do like to say hello to them at the bonfire though.

Gally jumps in the box. “Day one, Greenie. Rise and shine,” I like to think of it has a pretty iconic line. Every single greenie hears it. Gally gets the greenie out of the box and shoves him on the floor pretty harshly. Everyone gathers around him to get a good look. “Kid looks like a slopper to me,” someone yells out. “I could use some help in the kitchen,” says frypan. Pretty understandable considering he’s the only cook. Everyone else was just laughing at him. Poor shank.

Assuming that he was scared like most greenies when they first enter the glade, he got up and made a run for it. I have to go it to him, he’s quite fast. Runner material if I do say so myself. That was until he tripped and fell right on his back. That’s also when the laughs started. I did let out a little giggle myself.

The greenie got up and looked around. The first time a greenie gets a good look at the glade is memorable one. A look at the place that me and the other Gladers have been for a long time, a place that they will be for a long time. It has to be quite scary seeing the big walls surrounding them, keeping them from the outside world. But there’s not much we can do about that is there.

To keep him from running again the boys throw him in the pit, for good measure. And then everyone got back to work. I helped getting the supplies out seeing if there was anything good, which as usual there was. Just a bit of medication that we were running out of and some gauze. I grabbed everything that was for the med-jack hut and went back with it.

Once I finished putting all the new supplies away, I stood out at the door of the watching Alby show the greenbean the glade. I know doubt that he has loads of questions, unlucky Alby. While watching them I see Newt walking up to the two boys with his little limp. A smile forms on my face when I see him. Every time I’m around Newt he never fails to put a smile on my face, which isn’t too surprising because he is my best friend. One of the only boys who keeps me sane.

I watch the boys conversate and before I knew it newt had left the two boys, probably going to find Chuck I assume. I stay in the doorway of the med-jack hut, people watching. There isn’t always a lot to do so it’s a good past time until I can make myself useful. Alby takes the greenie up on the lookout, Newt goes and finds Chuck, The Gladers do their respective jobs. All is well.

I continue watching everyone. My eyes lingering on Newt for a bit longer than I would like to admit. I see the greenbean walk away from Chuck and towards the entry to the maze. Chuck catches up to him and try’s his best to persuade the greenie not to go out there. Seriously he’s a tough one. One out of the three rules is to not leave, and what does he want to do as soon as he leaves Alby’s eyesight. They can tough sometimes that’s for sure.

Then Minho and Ben emerge from the maze, taking a look at the Greenie running straight past him. And there the Greenie goes again, trying to ‘have a look at the maze.’ And now obviously he’s getting a bit too close, and some Gladers are noticing this. One of them being Gally. Gally being the hot-head he is goes straight up to the greenie and shoves him straight to the ground. The Greenie gets a bit agitated and grabs some Gladers attention, me included. I get up and start jogging to where the boys are.

“What the hell is wrong with you guys,” the greenie spits out. “Just calm down alright,” says Newt. “No why won’t you tell me what’s outs there,” says the greenie again. “We’re just trying to protect you man,” Alby states. “For your own good,” says newt.

“you guys can’t just keep me here!” Obvious distress.

“I can’t let you leave,” says Alby.

“Why not?” the greenie says and is if on cue we hear the walls. The rumbles signalling that they are about to close. We all focus our attention on the wall while it shuts close. Hopefully scaring the greenie enough.

“Next time, I’m going to let you leave,” says Gally, trying to prove a point. As always.

The Greenie starts at the walls in shock as if he just saw his whole family die right in front of him. I start to walk off as all the commotion has ended until I hear my name being called from behind me. And I can immediately tell from his accent that its newt. “Y/N!” Newt calls.

I turn around and looks at him. “What’s up,” I call out while he walks over.

“Are going to say hi to greenie yet or what?”

“y’know I only do that at the bonfire, that’s when they have the most questions.”

“of course, I guess we’ll talk then.”

“Yeah, see you later,” I call out while walking off. Newt shouts a little see ya while he walk in the other direction. On greenie days I never really have enough time to talk to Newt until the bonfire at night. Which is 100% the worst part of greenie days. Not being able to talk to my best friend for the whole day. It could be worse though.

Tags: @honethatty12

 Sorry the chapter took so long to get out. This chapter is a bit shorter than the first one. Also, this was written at 3:00 AM and I just used the editor thing on word to edit because I cant be bothered so im sorry if someone this does not make sense.

falling in love more and more everyday

It’s giving boyfriend material 🤭

Chapter 4: Ben

(Third Person)

Alby wakes up early one morning, with the intention of waking up Thomas so he can carve his name into the maze wall. He quietly walks around all the boys sleeping, trying not to wake them up. He gets over to Thomas and covers his mouth with his hand. He lets out a quiet “Thomas” and shushes him. He takes his hand off Thomas face and asks him to follow him. Thomas quickly gets up and follows him.

While Alby and Thomas Walk towards the maze wall Alby decides to tell him a little snippet about how it was in the glade. “It’s peaceful, isn’t it? I know it’s hard to believe, but it wasn’t always this way. We had dark days. We lost a lot of boys to fear, to panic. But we’ve come far since then. Established order, made peace.”

“Yeah, why are you telling me this,” Thomas says still looking confused as always.

“Because you’re not like the others, You’re curious. But you’re one on us now. You need to know what that means,” says Alby while placing a knife in his hand.

He points at the wall behind Thomas to show him the names of the other Gladers, some crossed out for obvious reasons, but Thomas still looks concerned.

“What happened to them?” Thomas asks and points at the names crossed out on the wall.

“Like I said dark days, Thomas,” Alby says with a little crack in his voice, as if he was reliving horrible memories.

Thomas takes a few steps closer to the wall and holds up the knife to a free space at the wall and starts to carve his name, like he’s finally become a real Glader.

(Y/N’s Perspective)

I was sitting in the Med-Jack finishing wrapping up a slicers hand after he damaged it. I let him go knowing that he’s going back out to continue working hoping that he doesn’t cut it up again. Clint and Jeff are also in the Med-Jack hut helping bandage people up. I decide to clean up the place a little, but before I could get to it, I hear someone yelling help from outside. I look at Clint, Jeff and their patients and they all have their heads looking at each other as well. I immediately start to panic. Last time I heard someone screaming out for help was when Newt had his accident.

I rush out the door and look to see where the sound is coming from. In the distance I see a group of boys near the Gardens. I start running over to see the commotion with a bit relief that it wasn’t a situation like Newts. Once I get over, I squeeze through some of the boys to see that situation. Ben on the ground with Gally, Newt and Frypan holding him down.

“Yo, What the hell happened?” Asks Frypan.

“He just attacked me,” Thomas says while quickly getting up and wiping dirt off himself. Alby walks over and Ben has a look of some sort of realisation in his eyes.

“No, No, No,” Ben starts wriggling around. Alby notices that something is off. “Alright, Lift his shirt.”

“I didn’t mean it,” Ben screams out as Newt lifts up his shirt to reveal a nasty sting. My hand covers my mouth immediately. I can feel everyone around my move back a little, quite obviously scared.

“He’s been stung, in the middle of the day,” Gally points out and Alby crouches down beside him. It is scary to think about that. No one had ever been stung in the day before, which I think had everyone a little on edge.

“Help me, please. Please. Please, just help,” Ben cry’s out. I can tell he’s in a lot of pain by the way he’s keeping his eyes closed tightly, his whimpering and rapid breathing. Right now, there is no time to worry about his pain, it’s clear he’s going to be banished for trying to attack Thomas.

“Put him in the pit. Come on, everybody help,” Alby says, and everyone starts to back away while Gally, Newt, Frypan and Jeff carry him away while everyone walks back to work.

(Third Person)

Everyone is gathered around the opening of the Maze door with their sticks. “Just listen to me. Just, please, listen to me. Please Minho,” Ben growls out while Minho walks him to the front of the Maze door and in the middle of everyone. Minho forces him down onto his knees and cuts the rope that was holding his hands ties together. Thomas and Chuck are watching this from the outside the circle.

Ben is sitting on his knees coughing and crying. “No, no please. Please don’t. Please don’t do it,” Ben cry’s out. Minho throws in Ben’s pack and then the maze door starts rumbling signalling that they’re going to start closing.

“Poles!” Alby calls out and everyone faces their poles towards Ben. “Move in,” Alby calls out again and everyone starts inching closer to Ben. By this point Chuck has walked away leaving Thomas to watch this all by himself. Everyone start pushing Ben closer in while the door is inching closer and closer.

“No. No, no, no. Please. No. Please. Please. Please don’t! No, I can get better! Please! Just listen to me!” Ben continues to cry out for help as the boys continue to push him into the Maze. The boys fully push him in and now he as no other choice. He either has to be squished by the maze doors or go inside the maze.

“I’ll get better! I’ll get better!” Ben screams out desperately. Ben takes one last looks inside the Glade before the maze doors fully close of him.

Everyone stands in place without saying a word. Alby looks around at everyone until his eyes land on Thomas who has an upset look on his face.

“He belongs to the maze now,” says Alby before walking off. All the boys and Y/N lay their poles against the maze walls and also walk off.

(Y/N Perspective)

Later that night I’m laying in my hammock trying to get to sleep. In the distance I can see Gally crossing out Bens’s name on the wall, with a couple of the other boys holding fire so he can see properly. It essentially lights up that whole corner of the Glade.

“Do you think he might make it?” Thomas Asks Chuck. Thomas is sitting down on his hammock also watching Gally, While Chuck is laying down in his hammock.

“Ben? No. No one survives a night in the Maze. You just gotta forget about him,” Chuck replies to Thomas. It’s pretty solid advice. No one is ever going to see Ben ever again; we all know it and there is nothing anyone can do to change it. Chuck rolls over facing away from Thomas.

“Go to sleep, Thomas. He isn’t going to come back,” I say to Thomas.

He turns and faces me, then nods his head before laying down in his hammock and falling asleep.

Tags: @honethatty12 @sagittariusmoonlover

Boring chapter I’m sorry. Also not a single bit of interaction with newt in this but maybe next chapter. I was trying to find a place to write any interaction between because I don’t know.

When does a new chapter come out?

im aiming for before the end of this month, but im a bit busy rn because of family stuff and school starting again soon. but i will try and get it out ASAP