Visual Media Component For I Never Understood Summer Love.

visual media component for i never understood summer love.

read it here !

i’m not a very avid video editor so hopefully this looks as nice as i think it does- the youtube link is down below in case you have trouble viewing it

watch it here !

yes i know wtfock is over and yes i know we will most likely never see jens stoffels again (sad) but i’m still here in 2021 advocating for bi!jens + his shirt is literally the bi colours this is coded.

happy bisexual visibility day to my favourite (non-canon) bi character!! 💗💜💙

See You In Five Years.

a vds one shot. you can find more on my ao3.

( @ apolloswords )

feel free to comment/message me any suggestions for one shot ideas!

Sometimes, making life-long pacts with your best friend is the only way to avoid being alone. Even if you were never really alone to begin with.

Lucas didn't look up from his laptop even as he heard the pitter-patter of the rain against his window stop. He didn't look up when he heard his window slide open and he didn't even look up when he saw a shadowy figure from the distance slip right in. He only looked up when the figure shakes his head, tossing light flickers of water droplets from his dark wet hair towards the entirety of Lucas' room.

Really, he only looked up because some of it fell on his face and he groaned that he had shoved his bed too close to the window, clearly not protecting himself entirely from the now drenched boy staring at him.

Raising a brow, Lucas snickered as he took in how funny Jens looked. His dark hair was sticking towards his forehead, fitted button down shirt completely soaked and there was now a small puddle underneath his feet. Lucas tried to hide his snicker as Jens narrowed his eyes onto him, giving him a beady look.

"I take it the date didn't go so well?" He asked, biting his lip back from releasing his giggles.

Jens snorted. "Do I need to confirm that?"

"Well no," Lucas teased, "But I do want a backstory on how you found yourself climbing through my window in the pouring rain when you still have so much of the night left with your date." He got up from his bed and walked over to his closet, pulling out a clean fresh towel.

Jens just snorted again, as Lucas handed him the towel. The snarl on his face looked playful, but he still narrowed his eyes at him. Lucas just continued to watch as he dried his hair and patted his shirt down a bit, even though it still remained just as soaked.

"Do you have a shirt I could borrow?" Jens asked, clearly averting the topic of conversation. Lucas would let him get out of it for now, but it was going to be brought up again. One way or the other.

For now, he would help Jens avoid making a literal flood on his bedroom floor.

Turning back around into his closet, Lucas rummaged around in one of his drawers. Most of his own clothes were packed and in boxes, but he still left the small section of Jens' shirts and a spare hoodie stored where they always were. Picking up the first red shirt he saw folded up, he repeated the same motion and reached over to hand it to Jens.

"Thanks," Jens said, as he began to unbutton his shirt. "I keep forgetting that I have a stash of clothes at your place."

"You don't remember coming over with a backpack and a bunch of crumpled shirts after the first night you stayed over and claimed my shirt was going to suffocate you in your sleep so you made a show out of it by taking it off?"

"You don't remember my chest about to rip that thing apart and you crying that I was ruining your favourite shirt?"

"I was not crying." Lucas protested, before letting out a light huff.

Jens stuck his tongue out at him before peeling off the soaked button down, and Lucas tried not to look at the broadness of his chest before pulling the shirt over his head. It wasn't the first time he'd seen his best friend shirtless, but each time he did it was like a shock to his system. He always found Jens rather attractive, possibly even being the most attractive person he's ever laid eyes on. He was also convinced he was the most attractive person to roam the earth. But he didn't want to be awkward and make things weird, so he tried to avoid gawking at Jens and his prettiness, no matter how hard he tried.

After all, they were just friends.

Best friends sure, but just friends.

Lucas snapped out of his little thought bubble when he felt Jens unzip his black jeans off, leaving him in his boxers. He flopped onto his bed, enveloping in its soft warmth and Lucas was just glad he didn't crush his laptop. Sighing, Lucas took a seat on the edge of the bed, staring as Jens stuffed his face into a pillow and groaned.

"Dating sucks." He heard him mumble into the pillow. Even though Jens couldn't see his expression, Lucas nodded in agreement.

"Was the date that bad?"

Lifting his head up, Jens turned over and laid on his back. Lucas watched as his dark brown eyes glossed over his ceiling, frowning at the lack of posters that used to hang over his head.

"Did you already remove your posters?" He asked, clearly changing the subject.

Shrugging again, Lucas nodded. "Jens, we literally move into the flat next week. University starts in two weeks." Pausing, he looked at him, quite alarmed. "Don't tell me you haven't started packing yet."

Jens huffed out a laugh, the creases by his eyes crinkling a bit. "I have not. Thanks for reminding me. Maybe it'll be nice to finally meet some new people."

Raising his brows, Lucas gave him a smirk. "To meet as friends or to go on more horrible dates with?"

Scoffing, Jens wrinkled his nose and looked at him. "At this point, both. You're annoying me and I could easily replace your title of best friend."

"You won't. You already lost your dignity when you drunkenly admitted I was your new best friend. Poor Robbe, I don't think I've seen anyone so heartbroken."

"Yeah well, when you chose kissing me over Kes, I think he was just as heart broken."

"Kes is my best friend!"

"And I'm not?"

"You are. But, you're probably easily replaceable as well. Unlike him."

"Fuck you." Jens laughed, grabbing the pillow behind his head and gently hitting Lucas with that. "Take that back."

"Fine, I'll take it back." He teased, rolling his eyes in fake annoyance. Reaching over, he poked Jens in the stomach. "So, what happened on your date with that hot chick you saw at the club?"

"Hot chick?"

"I'm gay Jens, not blind."

"Fair enough." He snorted. Sighing, he just shrugged. "I don't know, I feel like she was just rushing too into it you know? Like it's our first date, and you're already asking me about a possible future? I don't even know your favourite colour!" Taking a paused, he sighed again. "Can't believe we were already talking about marriage."

"Damn," Lucas replied. He didn't really know what to say, so he gave him another soft smirk. "Doesn't really explain why you crawled through my window though."

"Because I think she wanted to kiss me in the rain but she had this seafood pasta at the restaurant and I was not willing to make out with lobster tonight. So I kind of ran away, realized I was on your street, hid in your bushes and figured I had some luck with your window."

"I have a front door."

"What's the fun in that?"

Giggling, Lucas shook his head. His soft curls, bounced lightly as he felt Jens still smiling rather cockily at his. Giving him a teasing look, he replied.

"I think you're just as much of a bad date as she was."

"Maybe," Jens admitted, laying his head back down on Lucas' pillow. "I hope she finds the guy who's going to agree to her wedding dress on their first date though."

Not really knowing what to say, Lucas nodded. He then decided he was feeling a little drowsy, so he laid down himself. The blankets, sweater and sweatpants he had on felt cozy and warm, but it was also the ease and comfort Jens gave him that made him want to drift off. Closing his eyes, he hummed lightly, allowing himself to listen to the gentle rain hit his windows as Jens breathed slowly beside him. A few minutes passed, and he felt Jens stir a bit. Opening his eyes back up, he took a peek at the boy, who was already gazing at him.

"What are you thinking about?" Lucas asked, taking in the expression on his face. After two years of knowing him, Lucas had gotten fairly good at reading through all his expressions.

"You know, some people have this pact. Like, if in ten years they don't get married, they'll just marry each other. Like a back-up plan."

"So in ten years, you're telling me you won't have one good date?"

"I mean, I didn't say that. But you won't find the one you want to marry I guess. So, you resort to the person you made a pact with. Probably better than being alone."

"Probably. Though, it would suck if the whole thing is orchestrated just so two people don't end up alone. Kind of sounds a bit lonelier."

"Yeah but," Jens sighed. He turned away from looking at Lucas and faced his, now empty, ceiling. "You would obviously make the pact with someone you could see living forever with. Someone platonic enough that you could see yourself being with them for the rest of your life."

There was something in the way Jens was speaking, something hidden. Lucas carefully studied the way his jaw was clenched, hands pressed firmly on his stomach and the intense chewing on his lip. There were many expressions of Jens that he had come to know and love, but this one suddenly felt the most unfamiliar.

"What are you getting at?" He finally asked, forcing Jens to look back at him.

"We should make a pact."

Widening his eyes, Lucas quickly bolted up. He let his jaw hang loose for a second, trying to see if there was anything to hint that Jens was joking. Jens slowly sat up and shook his head, wondering why Lucas reacted to strangely. How else was he supposed to react? His best friend had essentially asked to marry him.

At least, in the next ten years.

"Are you serious?"

"Dead serious. Shitty dates keep happening to us, at least in the end we'll have each other."

Lucas knew what his heart wanted. He knew exactly what he longed for and you know what, maybe, maybe, just maybe, in ten years, he could have just that. There were many risks that could occur if he agreed, but on the bright side, he could deal with it later.

As in, in ten years.

Getting up without a word, Lucas headed over towards his desk. It was probably the last part of his room he had left to pack. Pulling out some of his fancy art paper and some calligraphy pens, Lucas began to scribble about. He could feel Jens eyeing at him, as he tried to make the most impressive contract he could muster up in a few short minutes.

Finally, he headed over back to Jens. Handing it over, he watched as Jens began to read through it, his brows furrowing at the words on the paper.

"In five years from today, if we have no luck with anybody else, we will go on a date. And whatever happens from there, we will determine into our ten year plan. At least, we can test the waters before diving into, well, marriage." Lucas explained.

Jens nodded, agreeing with what was contracted. He looked up at Lucas, his beautiful brown eyes looking into his blue ones. Holding his breath, he tried not to get lost in them.

"Hand me a pen to sign it." Jens instructed.

And with that, both boys scribbled their names over the hasty black line Lucas had drawn out for them. The blue ink seeped into the paper, running a bit messily over top of each other's signature. Taking a second to admire the agreement, Jens turned his head to smirk at Lucas.

"See you in five years."

-

Banging on the door, Lucas waited impatiently for Jens to open it. He didn't think moving back to Utrecht meant Jens would follow him, but after they both studied at the University of Amsterdam and completed their degrees together, Jens figured it would probably be an easy way to make job connections if he stayed close to where he graduated from. Lucas wasn't complaining, even after the four years he and Jens had lived together during university. And a year later, after landing steady successful jobs, Jens being a producer for upcoming Dutch artists at a record label and Lucas being one of the main managers at a art and history museum, he was still not tired of coming home to his and Jens' shared place at the end of a long day.

Except maybe right now, when Jens was being stubborn and Lucas was getting annoyed at the feeling of wet clothes sticking to his skin.

"Jens, open up." He called out, banging on the door again.

A minute passed and Jens finally did open up. Lucas noticed the set of headphones he had on his shoulders and realized he must have been playing his music too loud to have heard him the first few times. Jens took one good look at the way his curls pressed agains his forehead as water droplets trickled down his face. He tried to look annoyed, but with the wet clothes still sticking onto him, he probably just looked cold and tired. And miserable.

"Jesus," Jens mumbled, opening the door wider so Lucas could come in. "You are drenched. Come in."

"Thanks." He huffed, trying not to sound as sarcastic as possible.

As he peeled off his wet shoes and socks, Jens wandered over to the thermostat to turn it up a bit. It still may be the last few days of the summer, but with how Lucas was shivering underneath his, now soaked, knitted sweater, he could use some extra heat. He peeled his denim jacket off his body as Jens disappeared into his room. Heading straight to the dryer, he dropped it in, ignoring the water droplets that leaked a little trail behind him.

"Here," Jens said, handing him a towel. "I suggest you take off your shirt and jeans off now, before you flood the rest of the place."

Scoffing, Lucas did as told. After he dumped his clothes in the dryer, he wrapped the towel around him "I'm going to head to the bathroom to dry my hair." He chattered, feeling even colder as he stood in just his boxers.

Jens nodded. "I'll bring you some clothes."

"Thanks."

Once he got into the bathroom, Lucas frowned at his reflection. His face looked extra tired, his cheeks sunken in a bit as the bags under his eyes seemed more prominent. This week had been hell, and it finished off just as horrible. A small knock on the door startled him quickly but he relaxed as Jens held a hand out with a change of clothes.

"I'm not looking." Jens announced as Lucas took the pair of sweatpants and sweater from him.

"I know." Lucas said, mustering a small smile.

He looked at the pair of grey sweatpants in his hands and Jens' red sweater, the one with a graphic design and was worn through a large portion of high school. A warmth finally glowed within him, feeling sentimental at the gesture of Jens giving him his own sweater to wear. The second Lucas pulled it over him felt like a warm and reassuring hug. He quickly slipped on the sweatpants and did his best to dry his curls. After freshening up by quickly washing his face and brushing his teeth, he sighed heavily. When he finally felt like he didn't resemble a wet rat, he walked out the bathroom and headed to his room.

He hadn't expected to see Jens laying on his bed. His headphones were now off and set aside on his night table. He hadn't looked up from aimlessly scrolling through his phone, and Lucas took a second to admire him. The blue shirt he wore hung loose over him, but his shoulders and chest had still gotten a little more broader since his teenage years. His gym shorts showed off his tanned legs from the days of the summer sun, which had defined some of his toned muscles. Lucas still considered him to be the most beautiful boy to ever exist. The weight of the horrible week and the horrible date lifted off his shoulders as he realized how lucky he was to come home to this, every single day for the past five years.

Finally, Lucas sighed and wandered over to the empty space on his bed. He flopped down and groaned into his soft pillow, earning Jens' attention. Jens looked away from his phone and smirked at him, before reaching out to push a few damp curls away from his face.

"I take it your date didn't go so well?" He teased, his smirk growing.

Lucas snorted. "It was probably the worse thing to happen to me all week. And that includes how I completely set up the wrong exhibit and had to stay until midnight to set up the correct one."

"You'd think we'd have some luck with dates by now. Let alone relationships."

Furrowing his brows, Lucas looked at him confused. "Didn't you have a boyfriend in your third year?"

"You mean the guy who just wanted me to have a threesome with his actual girlfriend? You can't really think that counts as something good." Jens scoffed. "I wasted a good six months on that asshole."

"At least you didn't get your date coming in with his boyfriend and asking for a threesome on the first date." Lucas groaned. "At least your asshole waited six months. Mine waited like, two hours."

"Holy fuck." Jens said, a laughter erupting from his chest. He tried to use his hand to cover up his wide grin, as means to empathize with Lucas, but it was no use. Laughter still escaped his body.

"Holy fuck," He repeated, as he tried to calm down from his outburst. "Is that why you're here so early? I wasn't expecting you to come until much later. Honestly, maybe not even until the morning."

Lucas snorted again. "Yeah, I decided to lie and say I was headed to the bathroom. That asshole and his boyfriend could pay for dinner for all I cared. But then I realized I didn't really know where I was and walked in like, fifteen blocks of pouring rain."

"You poor thing." Jens replied, finally slowing down from laughing so hard.

There was a sparkle in his eyes that seemed to create warm sparks throughout Lucas' body. The lamp that was dimly lit warmed up the soft smile on Jens' face, and his dark brown eyes looked rather golden. Outside his window was the soft pitter-patter of the rain, sounding much more gentle rather than the aggressive rain that had made it its mission to drown him on his walk home. Even when bad days, or bad weeks, occurred, Lucas always forgot about them the second he came home.

The second he came home to Jens.

"I found something while cleaning out my closet today." Jens announced in a whisper. Lucas finally remembered the curiosity about the sparkle in his eyes and widened his own eyes in response.

"Is that how you found your old sweater?" He asked, gesturing at the one he was wearing. "You haven't worn this since your first year at University."

"Kind of grew out of it." Jens explained. "But, I knew it would fit you still, so you can have it. You haven't grown much."

He tried to hold back his giggle and frown at the statement, but Lucas couldn't help the grin on his face as he knew Jens was giving him his sweater. Sure, it made sense, since there was no way it would fit him now, but it was still forever going to be Jens' sweater to him.

Even though it was on technically now his.

Whacking him playfully, Lucas rolled his eyes. "So, what did you find in the black hole of your closet?"

"Very funny." Jens retaliated. He rummaged his hand in the pocket of his black shorts and pulled out a neatly folded piece of paper. The look on his face was soft and shy, almost hesitant as he handed it to Lucas.

Unknowing what it could be, Lucas took a look at Jens, completely puzzled. Jens just shrugged and Lucas sat up before unfolding it. As the paper's words began to jump out, he felt his heart leap suddenly and couldn't help but drop his jaw.

It was the contract they had made five years ago. The one in which they had made a pact to go on a date if they were both single and not seeing anyone else. The silly date that was supposedly going to lead them to a marriage in the next five years. Lucas didn't actually forget it, but he didn't think it was serious enough to bring up again. He also figured they had lost it in the process of moving in and out of their residences and towards Utrecht.

"Check the date." Jens whispered. "It's dated five years ago today."

"Which means," Lucas whispered back. "Today is the day the agreement is supposed to occur."

Jens flashed a rather sympathetic smile. "Look, I know you may have thought it was stupid when we made it. I thought it was stupid too. But don't you think its a bit funny how five years later, we're in the same position we were in when we wrote that?"

"I guess it is all very coincidental." Lucas agreed.

"Luc, I don't know about you but when everything in my life went wrong, you were the last thing I saw at the end of every day. And I also realized that you were maybe the only thing I ever got right." He paused and bit his lip. "I'd be lying if I said you weren't who I wanted to be with for the rest of my life."

The smile on his face couldn't stop from growing and Lucas could feel himself about to burst with pure happiness. Jens still looked a little lost with the lack of response, so Lucas just gave him a playful wrinkle of his nose.

"If, you would like to take me out tomorrow for breakfast at the place down the street, I wouldn't oppose to it. In fact, I would actually look very forward to it."

Now Jens wrinkled his nose, but snickered lightly. "Did you just ask me to ask you on a date?"

"Was that not the plan we made five years ago?"

"You're right." He laughed. Turning quickly, he pulled up the blankets to Lucas' chin, snuggled under it himself and turned off the lamp. It took a second for their eyes to adjust in the darkness, but when they did, Lucas didn't mistake the way Jens was smiling at him.

"Are you sleeping with me tonight?" He giggled.

Jens nodded, still keeping his smile plastered on his face. "Yeah, so maybe then, you'll be the very first thing I see at the start of my day."

Lucas grinned and huddled towards the empty space between them. He felt Jens put an arm around his waist, pulling him in closer to his chest as his hand gently played with Jens' dark hair. Their feet were a tangled mess but that was just fine with him. He was warm, safe and in the arms of his best friend.

Though, if things finally went right, if he finally had a good date after an endless string of bad ones, maybe being just friends would be a title of the past.

Within a few minutes, Lucas felt his body drift off into a gentle slumber. The last thing he saw before his eyes closed was the way Jens admired him under the soft moonlight making its way past the rain clouds. The last thing he heard was Jens humming them both to sleep softly, their breathing in sync and chests rising together. The last thing he smelt was the faint smell of Jens on his sweater, but the strong scent of Jens and his mixture of shampoo, faded cologne and fresh laundry surrounded him, completely enveloping him. The last thing he felt was Jens pulling him in even closer, his hands having a firm but gentle grip on him, his arms holding the entirety of his body closer towards him and the gentle kiss placed on his forehead.

And finally, the last thing he thought of was how he couldn't wait for the morning.

fantasy vds is such a cool concept and i’d like to write more but then i recall that actual turmoil writing “somewhere only we know” cuz i cant write action scenes or create lore to save my life 🥲

I Never Understood Summer Love.

a vds one shot. you can find more on my ao3.

( @ apolloswords )

feel free to comment/message me any suggestions for one shot ideas!

Jens and Lucas experience a summer love together, but even when the seasons change, the feelings they have shared do not.

( jens and lucas | i never understood summer love )

I never understood summer love. Lucas thought to himself. Because I'll never know why they call it summer love when I still long for you as the leaves begin to fall.

-

The early chill of the autumn air was crisp this morning, as both boys slipped on their jackets before heading out for another day of school. The navy blue jacket of the taller raven-haired boy felt soft around his body. But not as soft as the gentle brown curls and skin belonging to the boy of his past. His summer past. And from across the school's courtyard, the boy of the summer sat, hugged by the denim jacket he had always found security and comfort in. But not as much as he found security and comfort in the boy his eyes could never break gaze from. Without even realizing it, he was watching him again. Wondering how they were once so close and intimate, to barely even holding an exchange of greetings now. Actually, he didn't need to wonder. He knew how they had become sudden strangers. But even if he knew the question to his own answer, that didn't break his stolen glances.

Until the other boys' dark brown eyes met his blue one, and he averted his eyes, looking away quickly. Ashamed to have been caught staring.

But he didn't know why he felt ashamed, why he felt like he needed to be ashamed. Lucas figured that when they went back to school, he would forget about Jens. Forget about the way the sunlight kissed the tip of his nose as he tossed his head back, laughing at some snarky remark he made. Forget about the way Jens looked at him, like he was the reason the sun stayed out all day. Forget about the way his hands trailed and wandered all over him, the curve of his shoulders, dip in his back and sharpness of his lithe jawline. Forget about Jens entirely.

Yet, even from across the courtyard, as both boys pretended they were nothing but someone passing by, he knew there was no way he could forget any of that. And as the autumn leaves rustled behind him, disrupting his golden memories, Lucas continued to long for the summer he once knew.

Frustrated, and feeling rather even more sorry for himself, Lucas got up and walked away.The newly fallen leaves felt loud underneath his feet, and with each step, it felt like he was walking away from more than his spot on the courtyard. His cheeks were a little pink from the harshness of the colder air, spiking his skin. Lucas could do nothing but just sigh. Deep down, he felt himself walk further away from what he had found familiarity with.

It wouldn't have been the second time he'd done that to avoid confronting the way he felt.

-

It started out like any other summer. Basking in the warm sunlight all day, partying under the moon all night. Yet, it was so much more different this time around. Lucas would have to leave everything he once knew behind. He would have to leave everything in his familiarity. It was no surprise that Lucas resented heading over to live with his cousin Milan, but since he was still in high school with no actual parent around, he had to find family elsewhere, And the closest thing he had to family was all the way in Belgium. Granted, it wasn't super far away, but Lucas already felt an ache in his heart the second he departed from his friends at the train station. Long gone were the days of Utrecht, and now were days of Antwerp.

It made him feel even more alone than he already did.

But that was until he saw him. He remembered the first time he had seen him. It was when he and Milan had gotten high at some park, laying in the grass that tickled the back of their necks and their fingertips. Milan had sat up, calling a group of guys over and even though Lucas' mind was a little hazy from the weed, he couldn't mistake how beautiful one of the boys jogging over looked.

He was tall, dark hair flowing as he came forward, skin so very sun kissed from spending all his days outside in the summer sun. The grin on his face was playful, but also rather teasing. Something in between a smirk and the start of a laugh. Lucas felt like he wasn't high anymore, as the world just seemed to clear and become in focus around him. But, at the same time, his whole body felt afloat. He felt a sense of euphoria, a rush of both serotonin and dopamine running through him.

The second their eyes locked, both of them stared a little too long at each other. Their gazes lingered, as they studied their unfamiliarity, but felt the pull towards each other. Lucas knew instantly. He couldn't mistake the way his heart skipped, the way he felt his cheeks go into a mellow pink and the small grin on his face, as he smiled to the ground. But the boy and his warm eyes, only gave him a smile back. Knowing the same thing Lucas did.

"Hey, I'm Jens." The raven haired boy introduced, a glint in his eyes as he eyed Lucas up and down.

"I'm Lucas." He replied back.

As the summer began to continue its long days, Lucas and Jens grew closer. The pull between them only seemed to get stronger as cryptic messages laid between their quiet conversations with words only shared between them. As their smiles became a little less secretive, and more knowing. Lucas didn't know what to describe this feeling as, but he didn't think he could even if he tried.

And even if he tried to deny it, to repress the confusion and second thoughts, he was at least sure of one thing.

There was more to this summer, this new life in Antwerp, than he had imagined. And more towards Jens, who he couldn't seem to get enough of.

-

Last night was a blur in Jens' mind. He didn't remember how it happened, couldn't remember how it could've happened. But one thing must have led to another, because he did recall bringing Lucas home after a quite eventful night of partying. The way Jens couldn't keep his eyes off of this new Dutch boy, and how even from across a crowded room, he searched for him. Looking around frantically until he was met with the sparkling blue eyes clearer than the bright blue sky and a pair of pretty pink lips turned up into a an even brighter smile.

It took him a second when he woke up, seeing the way the morning set aglow on a still sleeping Lucas to fully believe it. To fully believe he was right there. Jens got up for a second, pulling on his red crewneck and wandering out of his room for a second.

Maybe it was a dream, maybe it was all in his head. The endless pining over Lucas had finally caught up to him, the way he loved looking at the stars reflect in his bright blue eyes, freckles dance over his nose and smile light up each one of his days. But when he wandered back in, he saw him again. Saw the way Lucas still hadn't stirred awake and was nothing but a peaceful sleeping beauty.

Jens couldn't help but continue to admire him. Him underneath his bedsheets, his brown curls splayed all over his pillow. Jens felt his heart beat faster, even if his whole body remained at ease. There was something special about Lucas, something he had never seen in someone before. Let alone feel for someone before. But it didn't scare him. Even if his feelings were just as much confusing as they were strong, he wasn't scared.

Because when Lucas, very hesitantly, reached out to hold his hand the day before, Jens didn't need to be scared. Not when Lucas and his love made him feel safe.

So Jens held his hand back, feeling the cool metal of Lucas' silver rings against his fingertips. Long slender fingers intertwined in his own calloused ones. Lucas' hand in his, and his hand in Lucas'.

-

The night fell on both boys, but that didn't stop the glow from both of them light up Lucas' room. He and Jens had stumbled home from another party, both too sober to be willing to be around those not. But that was because they were intoxicated with each other entirely. Jens let his eyes watch Lucas in front of him, the way he touched his body like he was a sculptor sculpting his own self. The way Lucas' hands let the shadows of the night paint him like a masterpiece. Jens was didn't think he had ever seen anything so ethereal, nor did he think he ever would.

But here was Lucas, in front of him. The way he moved, the way he was just so himself in front of him. The vulnerability of both boys, looking at each other like nothing else in the world existed outside of them.

So when Jens pulled Lucas in, letting his hands now wander over Lucas, he was definitely sure nothing did exist outside of Lucas. The way their lips touched, creating both actions of desire and affection dictate their next move. The way Jens actually did think Lucas was something sculpted by a god himself, something so far out of humanity's reach. The way Jens poured every single part of him into entirely loving Lucas in a way he had never loved before.

Lucas wasn't just a boy he was lucky to meet and have a connection with. Lucas was a world all on his own, and Jens didn't think he could ever reach out and feel the wonders of a universe at the edge of his fingertips.

-

Yet, like all good days, the sun sets into the darkness of the night. And while some nights can be lit up by the brightness of twinkling stars and the illuminating beauty of the moon, some nights are filled with the darkness.

"We don't have to end it." The boy pleaded, his dark brown eyes widening as tears began to fill them.

"You're right we don't. But we lived a summer dream and I don't think it can continue."

"Why Lucas? Why must things change? Why are we doing this?"

The boy, who's blue eyes were just as teary tried to hold back the tremble in his voice but to no avail. "Because, things change. People change. And we have to go back to our normal lives now."

"So I can't make you apart of mine?" He cried, his voice cracking out of frustration. Jens felt like he couldn't breath. His chest ached from the anger and sadness, but not as much as his heart ached for losing Lucas. For losing his lover.

Lucas only bit his lip and shook his head. He knew Jens was right, he was allowed to be with him. He could be with him. But Lucas didn't know how he could accept Jens changing a huge aspect of his life to be with him. To be out, to be unafraid of being in love with a boy. To being in love with him, with Lucas.

"I can't have you changing your life just because of some summer where we hid in the shadows of the sun. I can't have you changing your life for me."

"Do you not want this anymore?"

Biting his lip again and finally letting the tears streak his face, Lucas shook his head. "No."

He'd never lied to Jens before, never felt like he had too. But he just did. To protect and hide the truth from someone he cared about. He couldn't let Jens know how much this ached him. He couldn't let Jens know that all of this was another change to his life, one he was afraid to accept, no matter how good of thing it was.

So as the summer sun began to hide behind the autumn leaves changing colours, Lucas figured that he had to let go. Let go of the boy who was more than just a summer love.

The truth was, Lucas had no problem loving Jens at any point of the year. In every month, week and day. In every hour, minute and second. In every season, life and universe.

-

Sometimes when Lucas was sad, he would lay down on the floor of his room and simply put on his headphones. If it was any other day, he would probably scroll through the abundance of playlists he'd curated, ranging from eccentric 70's pop to Lana Del Ray's discography. Now, he would scroll through his library of records and listen to the soft strums of the guitar. Sometimes the songs played with covers of songs he knew, other times, they were just an abstract mess of melodies meddling together. Whatever it was, he enjoyed it.

He would think about the times he'd heard Jens mess around on his guitar, when they were both hanging out and not really doing much but enjoying each other's company. Jens was shy at first, almost refusing to even let Lucas hear him play, but after a few hangouts, he smiled at him and let him listen. Jens tried to impress him at first, wanting to show off his impressive guitar playing skills, but that wasn't what ended up impressing Lucas.

"Play that again." Lucas had told him. "Play that thing you just played.

Jens raised his eyebrows, letting out a confused laugh. "You liked that?"

He shrugged, not seeing why it was a big deal. "Yeah I did. It sounded really good."

"I was just messing around." Jens admitted, blushing slightly. "It was just something that came to me, nothing that special."

"Well," Lucas smiled at him. "You should mess around even more. I think what you just played may have been my favourite thing yet."

So that's what Jens did. They spent the rest of the quiet summer afternoon messing about on his guitar. And Lucas recorded it, wanting to keep something of this moment forever.

And now, when he was alone in his room, he realized it was a good thing he did. It might be the last thing of Jens he had.

-

Lately, Jens had started to take the long way home. Not because he was rather adamant on getting home, or because he enjoyed walking, but because he considered it to be more scenic. Walking through the small part of town, with the local shops decorating their fronts to fit the autumn aesthetic was definitely scenic, but that wasn't what caught his eye. What caught his eye was the boy in the window, the one who was busy working in some local boutique by helping. Lucas had begun working there, shortly after school started, from what he heard from Milan. And Jens never had the nerve to step inside, he knew the reaction he'd get from him if he did.

But Jens couldn't help himself from taking this route. Aside from seeing Lucas at the courtyard before school, the slight passing by in the halls and from his back seat in History class, it was one of the other times he could see him. He would have loved to talk to him, to strike up conversations like they once had.

He knew he couldn't. He couldn't mistake the way Lucas avoided him, instantly looking away or leaving the second he caught Jens looking at him. Or when Jens caught him looking. Whatever it was, he knew Lucas wanted to be left alone. Jens wished he could convince him otherwise, but that probably would only make things worse.

So Jens would just sigh. Even if the small glimpse lifted his spirits up and made his heart swell for even the slightest second, he only felt worse each time as he walked away.

-

"I just don't get it." Jens said as Lucas felt his heart beating. "I don't get why you think you can't be in my life."

The last thing Lucas ever expected was to see Jens stumble into the boutique just before he was about to go on his break. It had been a month since they had their last conversation. He expected to feel euphoric seeing Jens come in and ask to talk to him, but he could only be reminded of their good times and felt his heart shatter as he realized that he was the one who put an end to that. And because after all this time, Jens hadn't forgotten about him.

Lucas let Jens lead him to some nearby park, to talk before Lucas had to head back to work. For the first minute, they sat in silence. It wasn't uncomfortable, but it was not the comfortable silence they used to bask in. They were both struggling on what to say, now that they had telepathically established what they would be talking about.

"I don't get why you think the summer was the only time we could be together. Fuck, I know some things don't always make sense but, I don't know why you think this does. This silence, this avoidance. At first I thought maybe I was just a fling, something for the summer. But I see the way you still look at me Luc, you and your big beautiful eyes staring at me and I feel my entire world just go to a still." Jens continued to ramble.

He looked up a bit, shocked how much Jens had observed about his recent behaviour. The words were caught in his throat, but he tried to force some sort of response out.

"You think my eyes are beautiful?" He choked out, his mouth quivering and his voice trembling.

Jens snorted, but nodded with a light laugh. "Yeah Luc, I think your eyes are beautiful. I think what we had was beautiful and fuck, I think you're beautiful. Okay? That's it. I think you're beautiful, I always have. It's not just your eyes, your smile or anything in specific, it's just you."

He still couldn't give out a response, at a complete loss for words. But he did the most natural thing he could do, the most natural things that Jens made him do.

Lucas smiled. He smiled his soft smile at Jens as his cheeks turned pink, a few shades lighter than his warm sweater against the cold air. Jens smiled back. Because even if Lucas hadn't said a word, much like the past few weeks, at least this silence was a bit more familiar.

As they smiled at each other, they realized the world around them didn't seem so cold anymore. There was another hint of the familiarity, a warm glow emitting from the both of them. Even in the later days of autumn, the summer didn't feel so far away anymore.

-

"I can't do this anymore. I can't keep seeing you and pretending this is okay. I can't keep doing this Luc, so just tell me. Satisfy me, make some shit up but tell me what I've been begging to know." Jens pleaded. "Why didn't you want it anymore?"

The party felt far away, even though they were only in the kitchen of the house. Lucas didn't know how to go about stringing the words, rather they were lies or the truth. When no response came out of him again, Jens just nodded to himself. Without a word, he turned, finally being the one to walk away.

"Do you really not get it?" Lucas blurted out, surprising the both of them. Jens turned around quickly, his mouth slightly hanging open and his eyes wide. It urged Lucas to continue, finally admitting the truth.

"That I'm fucking in love with you." He breathed out. "You came into my life while everything around me was changing and I didn't think that I'd have something good come about that. But you came and you were a good change, a good thing. The first good thing in awhile and maybe even the best. And I know it didn't scare you, but it scared me. I lied when I said it was for your sake, because it was for mine. I was the one thinking you couldn't be in my mess of a life, couldn't be caught up in the mess that is me. I loved you too much and I knew you deserved better, better than me."

Smiling softly, Jens shook his head like he was about to tease Lucas. "I can love you anytime I want Luc, and the funny thing is I do. Because while things do and will change, some things don't. And for me, it's the way I feel for you." He paused, coming closer to him and placing gentle hand on Lucas' jaw. Whispering, he added. "Because I'm in fucking love with you too."

-

A few weeks later, Jens was holding Lucas back into his arms in the later hours of the night. The familiar feeling of his bedsheets against his bare skin, Lucas beneath him and the brisk of the night through his slightly open window let shivers down his spine. But they were quickly counteracted by the sparks igniting through him from the smaller boy who was a bundle of warmth against him. Jens smiled down at him, against the soft tickles of his curls against his face and vibrations of his light snored against his chest. He kissed the top of Lucas' head, wishing him a good night's sleep.

I never understood summer love. Jens thought to himself. For how could I only love you in in one season, when you were meant to be with me in each and every one.

ahahahaha what is with all this bike content??? first we get nathan promoting some sort of bike company and then we get flo on noah’s story biking and being really hectic???

i mean i am LIVING for the parallel but bikes were not in my top 3 ways nathan + flo could be interconnected