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They are screaming at each other.

Mwah!

(Fulvus puts all his Ravenguard training to use for one critical mission; Giving Titus a SMOOCH! Things naturally get silllyyyyyy)

The game was simple; Find Titus without his helmet (easy) and then kiss him before he could reciprocate (slightly difficult) and avoid being found by him until sunset (very difficult). These were the parameters Fulvus set for himself. There was no point to the game, no real end goal, but hey, Titus seemed stressed as of late and had been extra grumbly and broody, so, it was up to him to help his fellow Lieutenant relax.

First, he had to set a trap for him to initiate the first ambush. He took some of his cologne, and spritzed it a few times in Titus' room, ensuring the scent was especially fragrant near the Astartes' bed. Step one is complete. He lowered himself slowly from the vent, rustling the sheets around before leaping back up and settling himself in his hiding spot. He held his breath, slowing his hearts before hearing heavy footsteps. The door opened, and Titus entered the room in all his glory. He was sweaty, clearly fresh from training, his greying hair slicked back, and his nostrils flared as he looked around the room in confusion.

Time to strike. Fulvus dropped down, using his calves to ensure he was still half in the vent. He pressed a kiss on Titus's cheek before pulling himself back up swiftly, leaving the Ultramarine baffled as he looked up at the vent "Fulvus??? What in the world are you doing?" He asked, but Fulvus was already on his way to another ambush point to wait.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆☾⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆☾⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚

Next, Titus would naturally be on edge, and to try to ease that edge he would make his way to the dining hall where Fulvus had placed his next trap; Fudge nutrient paste cookies, which as of this moment were being removed from the oven. Sure enough, Titus entered the dining hall and gave a quick look around before entering the kitchen to grab a cookie. Ambush! Fulvus slid from his hiding place near the fridge, rushing past and pressing a swift kiss to the back of Titus' neck before sliding into the next available vent. Titus yelped in surprise and tried to grab him, but he just wasn't fast enough. Fulvus scurried through the vent to prepare the third trap.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆☾⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆☾⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚

Fulvus positioned himself over the final location; the main vent access. Titus would naturally try to make his way in to find his-Wait. He was distracted as he heard a strange sound. It was loud thuds, followed by some sniffing, and then he heard a familiar voice "Go on, get 'im Matti! Bring us Fulvus!" He heard Chairon shout "Gogogogo!"

He then heard a snarl before the sound of claws on metal filled the air, and before Fulvus could attempt to flee his ankle was grabbed by a giant, clawed hand before he was ripped out of the vent with a startled shout. A towering Space Wolf stood over him as he was dragged into the hall, his short blond hair a mess and his mouth hanging open in a wide smile. Chairon rubbed the man's back as Titus crouched down over Fulvus, a smirk on his face "Ultramarines specialize in strategy, Fulvus." He teased before kissing him.

Yeah, mission failure.

IT’S OFFICIAL, THE SPOOKY SEASON HAS BEGUN

Can't read it rn, will reblog to read later

Comfort

Pairing: Roboute Guilliman x FemReader

Warnings: Some light suggestive content

Description: Lady Guilliman comforts her exhausted husband

Here's my first venture into the world of fanfiction, people. Keep in mind my knowledge of the Warhammer40k universe is mostly second-hand. Details may not exactly line up with canon. Be gentle, please!

By the damned Throne, I am tired.

Roboute Guilliman, Primarch, Lord of Ultramar, Lord Regent of the Imperium of Man, held his head in his hands. The words on the parchment before him blurred. He blinked rapidly, to little effect. His eyes burned.

What time is it, anyway?

The minutes, hours, days even, merged together in his mind. That same mind normally buzzed with a thousand thoughts, plans, theoreticals, and practicals. Not now, though. It seemed exhaustion had finally won. He felt… numb.

Why do I even bother? Why keep fighting?

He rubbed his hands over his face, struggling against the despair that had begun to haunt his waking hours once again. 

Wake up, you fool! Think! There’s too much to do! Too much-

“My Lord?”

Guilliman’s eyes snapped to the tall, armored figure standing before his desk. He hadn’t even noticed the Ultramarine’s approach.

“Yes, Sicarius?”

To anyone else, the Captain’s face would have been a stoic mask. But Guilliman could see the slight twist of the lips that marked his disdain. That was a look he usually reserved for-

He pushed himself upright in his chair. “She’s here.”

Sicarius nodded stiffly. “Lady Guilliman,” he said your title like it tasted sour in his mouth, “has requested an audience.”

Guilliman winced. “Were those her exact words?”

“She requested,” again the look of disdain, “I repeat them verbatim, my Lord.”

Guilliman stifled a sigh. “See her in.”

A few moments later the door slid open and you entered. Guilliman felt his hearts stutter. Nearly a Terran standard year since the wedding, and the sight of your face still made him catch his breath. So small, so soft, so lovely.

And so very annoyed.

“My Lord,” you murmured, dropping into a formal curtsey. 

Oh yes, you were most definitely annoyed.

He spoke your name, loving the way the syllables rolled off his tongue. The irritation in your eyes faded softly as they glided over him.

To anyone else he knew he would appear the image of the semi-divine Primarch. Indomitable and confident. He knew you saw more. You saw the furrows between his brows. You saw the hollows in his cheeks. You saw the weariness in his eyes. From the first moment he’d met you, he’d sensed your uncanny ability to strip away all pretense and see things clearly.

To see the man behind the demi-god.

“Oh, Roboute.”

Throne… 

He could listen to you say his name for hours. He had, in fact. He’d heard you pant it. He’d heard you scream it. He wanted to hear you do so again.

Your eyes widened. Then the annoyance on your face vanished completely and you laughed.

“No, no, Roboute. You’re not distracting me so easily this time.” You approached, circling the desk you could barely see over to stand next to him. “We need to talk.”

“I can guess what about.” With effort, he tore his eyes from you and refocused on the stacks of paperwork littering the desk.

You reached out and laid a hand on his thigh. “You’ve been in here for a week, my love. An entire week. You haven’t eaten. You haven’t slept.” You sniffed, then wrinkled your nose. “You haven’t bathed.”

He felt his cheeks heat. “I have been working.”

You continued as if he hadn’t spoken. “The administrators and officers are concerned. The serfs are whispering. Roboute, look at me please.”

He did, reluctantly.

“Your sons are even starting to notice something’s wrong.”

His eyebrows shot up at that. “They’ve… spoken to you?”

“Lord Calgar himself suggested I might talk to you, Roboute. It’s gotten that bad.”

“Sicarious hasn’t seemed unduly concerned.” 

You rolled your eyes. “That man has all the emotional sensitivity of a hunk of ceramite. Besides, I think he’d rather be fitted for a dreadnought than ask my help on anything.”

Guilliman huffed a short burst of air through his nose. “Still not getting along, I see.”

“I practically had to order him to let me see you. Yes, yes.” You waved a hand. “I know you’ve given me the authority. But I can’t imagine pulling rank on The Cato Sicarius will endear me to him.”

You shook your head. “All that is beside the point. In all the time we’ve been married, you’ve never shut yourself away for this long. You’ve never shut me out for this long. Roboute, what’s wrong?”

He stared back at the never-ending paperwork. Frustration welled within him, momentarily displacing the exhaustion.

“What’s wrong? Void, what isn’t wrong?!” He stood suddenly, causing you to shy back. “Here, a missive from the Ecclesiarchy, pontificating on and on about my lack of ‘enthusiasm’ for their nonsensical rituals. There, another Inquisitor foaming at the mouth about supposed heretics within my own Ultramarines. And there, the damned High Lords of Terra respectfully refusing to put another of my reforms into effect!” He slammed a fist onto the desk, cracking the priceless wood. “And all this while planets are screaming for aid from Tyranid hive fleets, Astartes chapters are stretched to their breaking points, and millions of lives are being snuffed out by the day! Stupidly! Wastefully!”

He only realized he was shouting when he saw the pained look on your face, hands clasped over your ears.

The frustration drained away, suffocated once more under the tide of exhaustion. “I am sorry, my love.” He slumped back into his chair. “I… I am sorry.”

“Stand up.”

“What?”

You smiled gently up at him. “Please, Roboute.”

He stood. 

“Thank you. Excuse me.”

Blinking burning eyes, he watched you scoot past him and clamber onto the seat of his chair. Then, after carefully moving a few stacks of paperwork aside, you climbed onto the desk itself, settling on your knees. Now your head was nearly at the level of his chest.

“Love? What on Terra are you-?”

You shushed him. “Turn the chair around, push it back against the desk, and sit down.”

He was a fool for you, that was the only possible explanation. That, and he was simply too tired for questions. He did as you asked, now facing the great window looking out upon the starry void. He took in the constellations and idly calculated the Macragge’s Honor’s exact position.

“Lean back.”

Something soft cushioned his head. Two somethings in fact. Two somethings he was quite familiar with under different circumstances. Then delicate fingers carded through his hair, nails scratching lightly at his scalp. 

Oh. Oh Throne, yes.

You laughed softly at the groan that emanated from his throat. When one of your hands moved to knead the back of his neck, he swore he was melting.

“I cannot halt the Tyranids, or increase the Astartes.” You whispered. “I cannot talk sense into the Ecclesiarcy or the Inquisition. I could possibly chastise the High Lords, if I didn’t know they’d go straight back to being idiots as soon as my back was turned.”

Guilliman closed his eyes and focused on your words, your touch.

“I cannot take care of the Imperium. That is your duty, and no one else could do a better job.” Warm lips pressed against his cheek. “My duty is taking care of you. I knew it from the day I met you.”

“I love you, Roboute.”

“I love you too, my hearts.” He pressed the words past the lump in his throat.

“Then please, please let me do my duty. Let me care for you.”

What did I do to deserve this woman?

The fact that you’d come to him when he was at his lowest was almost enough to make him believe there was some all-knowing force for good in the universe. Almost.  He nodded, not trusting himself to speak.

You sighed in relief. “Thank you, my love. First, we’ll return to our quarters and you’ll sleep. Then, I’ll have the cooks prepare a meal. A real meal, not that vile sludge you feed your sons. Then, a bath.”

“You’ll join me?” He muttered, already feeling the lure of sleep.

“I will.” Your voice was suddenly right next to his ear, “And, if you're very good, we’ll do more than bathe.”

At that his eyes opened and he craned his head back to look at you. You blushed at the look of hunger on his face.

“Sleep and food first, my husband.”

Suddenly energized, he surged to his feet, turning and sweeping you into his arms. “We’ll see about that, my wife.”

As you gasped and giggled, he smiled, truly smiled, for the first time in weeks. The universe was still on fire. The Imperium was still a cesspit. A million problems still awaited his solutions.

But you were here. His personal symbol of all that was still good in humanity. His one comfort.

He would keep fighting for you.

@lemon-russ @moodymisty @cosmic-cryptid-from-beyond @bispecsual @kit-williams @sleepyfan-blog

(I would tag more but I don't want to annoy anyone who didn't specifically ask for it. I'm just going to hope this makes the rounds eventually.)

And than he ordered to wrap all xeno tech cargo into bubble film :D

Funny how it looks without text, how many meanings come into looks and the sigh. Like he is so tired, but resistance is futile :D

I cannot emphasize enough how much of a life hack it is to exclusively be friends with, date and marry people who are not constantly mean assholes to you.

happy x files season

Bg3 as unhinged posts part 26/?

Part 25

bg3 companions' responses to "I want a baby"

Pretty boy eyes! 🥺

reblog if you're a sick individual who's attracted to women over 30

Konrad is indeed a big nudist.... Mainly because he doesn't understand nudity taboos, hell I don't think he even really wore clothes growing up on Nostramo, just what ever rags or skins worked.

So imagine being a poor remembermancer, you are assigned to the most pants shittingly scary Legion of them all, you are strolling/sneaking along the ship and bamn, Konrad walks around the corner with it all flopping out.

Every time Konrad gets mentioned I am reminded that the man isn't just a clown, he's a goddamn circus.

hear me out if you play 40k then "brother" and "Sister" becomes gender neutral labels of address in the same way "dude" is gender neutral if you're from california. use them interchangably dependant on the context for extra gender fuckery

it's never not funny to address your freinds like you're all space marines or sisters of battle, even in the most mundane of circumstances

you and your freind are eating together, then one of you turns to the other and says, in the manner of a space marine asking for ammo, "Brother, would you care to pass me the condiments?" "Have faith in the emperor, sisters! we shall not be defeated!" you are in the middle of a tedius house chore trying to keep one another on track

you see my vision

The feather cloak part got me XD Hell, even the book with a heavy emphasis on the Night Lords (and Curze for that matter) is titled "Prince of Crows" as if his lil bro wasn't the one named after the Corvidae family lol Somehow, this is the height of hilarity to me The rivalry between the two goth primarchs

stop calling curze a hypocrite

curze hating his sons? NON hypocritical, he genuinely believed his philosophy and followed it, which his sons were not. we see him taking actions against this, and his secret sadism doesnt change this.

curze hating his sons? part 2 late curze edition? NON hypocritical. his sons were monsters and he hated them for it, he was a monster and he hated himself for it. hell he died for it!

curze hating chaos? NON hypocritical. being tainted by chaos when youre chilling with the traitor crew is unavoidable, and not the same as worshipping/falling to/even liking chaos.

curze blowing up nostramo? NON hypocritical. nostramo like... deserved it... and like... okay think of how many unnessecary deaths he prevented in the long run, like the long long run, like 10,000 years down the line. it probably balanced out by now.

curze wearing a feather cloak? NON hypocritical. he hated corax for non-style reasons and curze wore it better anyway.

Decided to draw interpretations of 20 characters from the video game Vampire the Masquerade: Bloodlines

Space marines just grab random baseline humans they like and make them their personal serfs and I think that's funny

like "You're my friend now. We're having soft tacos later :)"

Someone on discord said they thought the McFarlane Toys Titus looks like he ate a lemon. And so I made this

Two eager parents......

Wait a damn minute....

(also I didn't add details in case you guys want to color your own beakie.)

From Ravenlord, Corax reminisces about that one time he bitch slapped Horus:

.

The love of the Primarchs for their lover (Part 4)

Almost finished

Perturabo. His love is like a siege: persistent, unrelenting, and unstoppable.

His love for you is a love he cannot contain. He loves with an intensity and a purpose that few can understand. It's a love that's as relentless as it is passionate. He cannot be satisfied with anything short of their complete and utter devotion and he won't stop until he gets it.

His love is a force of nature, a force to be reckoned with. You cannot stop him, and you cannot stop his love for you. He will love you no matter what.

His love is, as you might expect, powerful. He doesn't know a softer kind of love; he loves with fire and iron. His love is passionate, determined, and focused. He loves as a blacksmith loves the process of making a great weapon and his love doesn't stop until he's created the ultimate creation.

The only way for Perturabo's love to be demonstrated is through work and his work is all about expressing his love and his devotion to his lover. He doesn't see a divide between his work and his love. To him, these are all a part of the same passion, the same love. And so long as his efforts achieve their intended purpose that is to honor and cherish the one he loves then that love is a success. It is a love that is about dedication and accomplishment and he is dedicated to his love.

Konrad Curze. His love is like the coming of night: terrifying and unstoppable.

His love is one that he cannot escape from. He is cursed to love you, and you are cursed to love him. He is plagued by an intense, all encompassing love that terrifies everyone else. Nothing can stop his love for his lover and there is nothing that can stop his lover from loving him.

His love is one of passion, but also of obsession and obsession alone. It is a love that is all-consuming and one that will never, ever end.

He's a man of extremes, a man of contrasts and his love for you is no exception to that rule. He loves you with an intensity that borders on obsession, but at the same time, he finds great happiness in the mere thought of being with you.

His love is one of passion and obsession... and yet, it's one that finds a kind of calm in knowing you'll always love him in return. His love for you is a contradiction that he would never even begin to comprehend. And it's one that makes his life worth living.

His love is not the most pleasant.

It's an aggressive, violent thing that comes without remorse or sympathy. His love is a violent and harsh thing that comes with no warning and it will do whatever it takes to ensure its own survival.

He loves in a way that is selfish. He loves in a way that is self-sustaining. But most importantly, he loves so that he may hate. The hatred that he so desperately crazes is what truly drives him. His love for you is unique in that it is violent and destructive... Yet, it is also tender and loving. It is a love of great extremes and of even greater desires. There is a passion in the desire to love his lover that cannot be matched by anything else.

Ferrus Manus. His love is like iron: strong, unyielding, and powerful.

His love is one of great intensity, but also great restraint. He loves like iron is made.. and he is like iron in his ability to overcome any threat to his love.

His love is one that is unbreakable... and one that will never be shaken. No matter what the world throws at him, he'll remain strong... and he will remain steadfast in his love for his lover.

He has a steely resolve, and he is a man of action. He shows no weakness, and he shows no mercy to those who oppose him. He is always on the offensive, always fighting. He will never give in to doubt, and he will never give up on his love. No matter how many things try to destroy his love.... he will never yield. His love is his strength—and he will never let it go.

His love is powerful, but also reserved. It is a love that burns with great passion, but is also very controlled. There is a balance between these two things that he has achieved... and it is in this balance that he has found a great deal of happiness. He loves you deeply and passionately, but he is also capable of restraint. It is a unique kind of love, one that requires great strength of spirit… and yet, there is nothing that he cannot do for the sake of the one he loves.

Horus Lupercal. His love is like a well-refined machine: powerful and unstoppable.

He loves with the intensity of a war engine and he is an unstoppable force of destruction when it comes to his love for his lover. He is a juggernaut and his love for you is an unstoppable one. He will never stop until he has conquered everything in his path and, hopefully, in the end, he'll conquer his lover as well.

His love is a unique one. It's a love that combines elements of both passion and desire with those of violence and domination. It's a love that's just as much about passion as it is about control and it is an unstoppable force of destruction and power. It's a love that'll consume you and it'll take everything from you.

There can be no doubt about the sincerity of his feelings; he is an unstoppable force of power and passion and he will never give up the fight. His love is an all-consuming force, a force that no one can resist. He will find you and he will bring you to their knees.

Corvus Corax. His love is like a fog: impenetrable even to the most powerful of lights. It is a love that is like a ghost, ever-lurking, ever-haunting, ever-following. It is an ever-present force that cannot be stopped or hindered and it is one that, when it catches hold of his lover, will never let go. His love is an insidious one, an impenetrable fog that hangs over him and his lover. A fog of love and a fog of misery, both eternal and indestructible.

He is consumed by a fog of love and a fog of misery. He is consumed by the spirit of love and the spirit of sorrow, both of which are as ever-lurking and ever-haunting as one another. He has accepted that fact and he has accepted the fact that his love is like a fog. He is surrounded by a great cloud, a great fog, a great spirit one that will forever haunt the heart of his lover. Yet, he still loves. And he will forever love, despite the sorrow that he feels. Despite the misery that he can only escape through his love. 

He loves with both passion and desire, but also with the deep sadness of one who can never fully love. He is a man who feels things deeply, and it's in those feelings alone that he finds some measure of companionship. He loves like the curse of eternity, an inescapable chain that pulls you to him, just as it pulls him to you.

His love is like a dream that never wakes up. His love is a beautiful one but it is one that is tainted by sadness. He loves with great passion, and his love is one that will never die. He loves like the beauty of a dream, a dream that will never come to an end. For he dreams only of his lover and yet, in that dream there are other things too. Things that he cannot shake away, things that weigh on his heart. His love is a perfect and beautiful dream but it is also one that's laced with darkness.

Curze grinned at the First Captain suddenly, transforming his visage into a death’s head rictus lit by febrile eyes. ‘Now you have met my brother, you must surely prefer crows to ravens.’

That was a joke, thought Sevatar. He did not understand jokes. ‘My lord, are we finished?’

For some unfathomable reason, that made Curze cringe, and he nodded like a rebuked child.

Konrad Curze: The Night Haunter by Guy Haley.

What are your thoughts on Sevatar? And what are your thoughts on Sevatar?

My thoughts are completely normal and work appropriate tyvm.

My SFW thoughts? He's refreshing. And I can relate to him a little-WAIT NO HEAR ME OUT!!!!

He calls out his dad for for trying to justify his genocidal actions as somehow a necessary evil. When Curze tries to make out the destroying of his home world as a Just Cause, Sevatar just kindve looks at him like- "so we're just outright lying now?"

Sevatar doesn't pretend to be a good guy, unlike MANY Space Marines (before the Horus Heresy), who believe to be doing a service to humanity, and ignoring the literal worlds filled with innocent people and xenos that's they've destroyed in the name of growth. Sevetar doesn't even bother with such delusions. He likes killing, he likes skinning people, and he enjoys the pain he causes. Why lie? It's a refreshing take for a Space Marine to have, it's even better that he calls out his own Primarch on his hypocrisy as well. Even more interesting is that he is still a victim of an abusive parent at the end of the day. Almost like a kid who makes up excuses for their shitty parents, Sevatar justifies his father's mania with "yeah he's crazy but he's not delusional y'know?" (I'm paraphrasing) and it's kinda sad. He even tries to save his pops but just ends up getting nearly choked to death for not accepting Curze's BS. No joke, he at one point asks Curze "Why do you hate your sons?" Like some teary-eyed little boy hoping to hear his old man actually DOESNT hate his kids.

Some other neat things I love about this guy:

The fact that he was the first EVER to say the iconic phrase: "Death to the false Emperor"?!?!? King behavior.

The man is hilarious, which is ironic considering he doesn't understand jokes (albeit Konrad's jokes suck ngl)

He likes birds which is cute, and he's a feminist??? (That last part is a joke, but there are two female characters whom he treats with some level of humanity)

I love that son-of-a-bitch so much. He easily earns a place in "Most Bestest and Hottest 30k Space Marines" right along Sigismund, Garviel and Khârn. (Also, talk about a dream line-up great googly moogly)

The human skin cloak thing is meh, but I'm sure I could fix him.

Now, my THOUGHTS on him?

I would let him own me. Use me. Destroy me. There is no level of depravity I wouldn't let him commit on my person. I need him to smile that sinister little smile while he chokes the life out-of me.

He's a cannibal for God's sake, he's a literal EATER. He'd eat you out to the point of torture for his own amusement.

He might just gnaw on your thighs, neck, ass, and chest till he breaks the skin-just a little taste, little one.

You're his little Starling, his song bird, his tiny fledgling, his Canary in a cage. He thinks you'd look so cute begging for whatever scraps he deems to give you.

He's not a nice man, but he can be more human than his father and most of his brothers. He may leave bruises, nip on your skin till you bleed, but you're like one of his crows. You're a companion, a pet, and he finds you amusing.

It would be in your best interest, little birdy, to keep him in a good mood. That mouth sings so prettily for him. He's sure you can put it to use in other ways as well.

He's one of the few men in the galaxy who can fuck you gently and make it more terrifying than if he just used your body up till you broke. Intelligent creatures like crows enjoy toying with their food, setting up traps and taunting them until they collapse from exhaustion, unable to fight back. He fucks you with a goal; to consume.

When you can no longer sob, every breath is exhausting, and you have no more orgasms to be wrung out of your limp body... Only then will he let go and completely ravish you. It's a good thing he's a busy captain; Otherwise, you wouldn't last a week under his attention.